FAMILY IN DANGER
The title of today’s sermon is “Family in Danger”.
The reason I picked this topic is because I believe the modern Christian families are in great danger and losing its influence on the secular society. You might think our society is peaceful, and there is no shortage of food for most of us. The advancement of technologies have provided us with convenience and entertainment that previous generations had never experienced. Facebook and IPhone have fundamentally changed the way we live and communicate. In the Western world, things don’t look too bad.
But I am here to tell you today that our society is falling apart. The moral standard is breaking down. Families are disintegrating. National debts are so high that we have to measure them in trillion of dollars. You probably heard on the news recently about the shooting in Scarborough and Colorado. Streets are not safe anymore. Drugs, violence and premarital sex are rampant among high school and college students.
Here statistics and national wide polls that were done:
· 41% of children born in 2009 did not have a father, comparing to 6% in 1960
· Almost 50% of marriages end up in divorce
· 70% of young men do not grow up before age of 30, meaning they can’t find a job after graduation and play video games in their parents’ homes
What about Christians? There is a shocking finding from Barna Research Group that 88% of all evangelical, born-again Christian young adults leave the church at age 18 – NEVER to return.
Brothers and sisters, our faith, family and freedom are in danger.
· The governments in general do not like Christians. The legalization of abortion and homosexuality are good examples that the law of God is absent from the Parliament.
· The public schools do not allow Christian material to be used. The student would get into trouble if she dares to mention the name of Jesus Christ.
· On the other hand, our children are taught that evolution is science and the Bible is simply a book of fables. Our children are encouraged to listen to the homosexual agenda put forth by hugely influential superstars such as Lady GaGa and Katy Perry. Our children and even young adults are indulged in video games and pornography like never before.
· The moral standards are lower every year and behaviors used to be “taboo” by secular society benchmark 40 years ago (such as immodest dressing and divorce) are now acceptable among Christians.
Another crisis for Christian families is the invasion of the Islamic faith into the Western world.
· The Muslims have already taken major political control in many European countries, such as United Kingdoms, Sweden, France and Germany. Muslims communities are growing very fast and its influence can also be seen here in Ontario. You see more Halah food in the grocery stores.
· Public schools allow Muslims students to practice their daily prayers and wear the headcovering while they ban Christian students to bring the Bible to school. If we as Christians do not wake up and start rebuilding our families, we are going to lose this country over to humanism and Muslims.
I can go on forever about these issues but I believe you have now got a grim picture of the challenges we are facing. Most of us are oblivious to the massive fall away of Christianity in the Western world. Personally I believe one of the major reasons for these problems is due to the disintegration of the traditional Christian families. Why is family so important? Because strong families would lead to strong churches, strong churches lead to strong communities, strong communities lead to strong countries where the law of God and love of Christ rule the hearts of men and everyone can enjoy maximum freedom, peace and joy in the Lord. So let us find out from the Word of God what should a biblical family or a Godly home should look like.
Biblical Family starts from marriage
First of all, when does a new family start? Well, a new family is formed when a man and a woman gets married. Let us read Mark 10:6-9:
10:6 But from the beginning of the creation God made them male and female.
10:7 For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother, and cleave to his wife;
10:8 And they twain shall be one flesh: so then they are no more twain, but one flesh.
10:9 What therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder.
Here, we learn a couple of things about marriage.
First, it is God who designs and institutes marriage between a man and a woman. Marriage is not between 2 men or 2 women, but a man and a female. We have to stand on the definition of marriage firmly. The Canadian law that legalizes gay and lesbian marriage is a direct violation of the law of God. We have to draw the line when we come down to issues such as the sin of homosexuality because it threatens the foundation of marriage.
The second thing we learn from the text is that a young man would take the initiative and find a suitable woman to be his wife. He would now leave his parent’s support and protection and form a new family unit with another woman. That’s not to say the young man cannot get assistance from his parents but by and large he is financially and spiritually ready to lead his dear wife. I think most of Christian fathers today fail to prepare their sons to be future husbands.
Third thing we see is that the husband and wife becomes 1 flesh. Physically they are still 2 bodies but their hearts should become one now. They would serve God and others together.
· Through intimate relationship they would start to know and cherish each other.
· After God, my wife should be my closest person in the world. Not my children, not my parents, not my buddies but my wife.
Last thing we learn is that God hates divorce. I know people would argue that the Bible allows divorce, but look at the previous verse in Mark 10:5 And Jesus said to them, “Because of your hardness of heart he wrote you this commandment.
· What kind of testimonies we give the world when there is a 50% divorce rate in the church? When we say in our wedding vow: “Till death do us part”, do we really mean it?
· Remember, marriage is holy and it is God’s desire that a man and woman would grow old together regardless of the challenges and hardships of life. It is God’s desire that the husband and wife would wipe each other’s tears and share each other’s joy every day.
Each Sunday in the announcement we bless the couples for their anniversary. We ask them “How many blessed years together?” 20 years, 30 years or 50 years. People from the secular world would be amazed and bewildered when they hear these answers. To them, 5 years of marriage is considered to be long. So I am here to encourage everyone who is married here to understand and uphold the holiness of marriage.
OK, let us move to different roles in the family. Husband has a role, the wife has a role, the children also have their roles. The apostle Paul gives us these teachings in the Book of Colossians.
Col 3:18. Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as it is fit in the Lord.
Col 3:19. Husbands, love [your] wives, and be not bitter against them.
Col 3:20. Children, obey [your] parents in all things: for this is well pleasing unto the Lord.
Col 3:21. Fathers, provoke not your children [to anger], lest they be discouraged.
And again he said this in the Book of Ephesians:
Eph 5:22. Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord.
Eph 5:23. For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church: and he is the saviour of the body.
Eph 5:24. Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ, so [let] the wives [be] to their own husbands in every thing.
Eph 5:25. Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it;
Eph 5:26. That he might sanctify and cleanse it with the washing of water by the word,
Eph 5:27. That he might present it to himself a glorious church, not having spot, or wrinkle, or any such thing; but that it should be holy and without blemish.
Eph 5:28. So ought men to love their wives as their own bodies. He that loveth his wife loveth himself.
The rise of secular humanism and feminism since 1900s have greatly affected the church. Men have abandoned the traditional roles of being the leader of the home while women seek to replace men in every aspect of the society. We have to realize that both men and women are equal before God, but they hold different roles and are given different responsibilities in the family.
Role of Husband/Father
Eph 5:23 Eph 5:23. For the husband is the head of the wife. God has ordained the husband to be the leader of his family.
Being the leader means the husband is responsible for everything that happens in the home. For example, if you are a manager at your workplace and something goes wrong with a project, your boss is going to hold you responsible, right? It is the same with husband because God is going to hold him accountable on Judgement Day. Who took the forbidden fruit from the Garden of Eden? It was Eve. But the Bible told us it was Adam who sinned because Adam was the leader of Eve and so he was the one to be blamed.
Now, being the leader does not make the husband more important or valuable in God’s eyes, but it does mean the husband needs to make careful decision and be ready to accept the consequences of the directions he has set for his family. Eph 5:25 tells us that the husband should love his wife as Christ loves the church. How did Jesus demonstrate his love for his church? He died on the cross for the church. He gave his own life for the church. Brothers, we also have to sanctify our wives with the Word of God. How do we do that? I believe we would take the initiative to pray with our wives, to teach and discuss the Scripture with them, to observe their spiritual needs and help them to grow in the Lord.
Just as Jesus Christ holds the positions of the king, prophet and priest of this universe, a father is also a king, prophet and priest in his home. When I describe these positions, keep in mind that we are looking to the perfect man Jesus Christ. He is the ultimate biblical man we would like to become.
· A father is a king because he is a leader, provider and protector.
o We have talked about the leadership role that God gives to a father. The father provides for his family, just as God the Father provides us with everything we need in this world. Not only the father has to put physical food on the table, but also he needs to provide his family with spiritual food by leading the family in worshipping God. The father protects his family from intruders into the home. He makes sure his home is safe and sound to live. But more importantly, the father needs to be the watchman or the gatekeeper of his home so that no evil and worldly influence can sneak into the family.
· A father is prophet because he is the moral teacher and enforcer.
o (Eph 6:4) And, ye fathers, provoke not your children to wrath: but bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord. In the Bible, when it comes to the education of children, it is the parents whom God identified as the instructors, particularly the father. Men, it is not the public school teacher, not the Sunday school teacher, not the youth pastor who is responsible for the education of your children; it is the father. Of course, the mother is also the teacher of her children together with her husband, but the father is the one who would set the goal of education for their children and provide the necessary resources to carry out the academic plan as well as the spiritual training.
o When the children need discipline, the father should reprove and restrain their bad behavior. I believe in spanking and I know some child experts criticize the use of the rod. But listen to God’s Word in the book of Proverbs. (Prov 13:24) He that spareth his rod hateth his son: but he that loveth him chasteneth him betimes. (Prov 23:13) Withhold not correction from the child: for [if] thou beatest him with the rod, he shall not die. (Prov 23:14) Thou shalt beat him with the rod, and shalt deliver his soul from hell. Just like everything else, there are parents who abuse the rod and cause injury of their children. However, if the rod is applied properly, when the father spanks the children not in anger but does it calmly and out of love, the child would be corrected and would not grow up to be a fool and rebellious against God. You see, when the father becomes the enforcer at home, he sends the message to the child that when you do something wrong, there are consequences and punishments that follow. It makes them respect and fear authority. When the children grow up, it would be easier for them to fear a higher authority than the father: God Almighty Himself. And it would save them from facing the eternal wrath of God in hell.
· A father is a priest because he is the intercessor and worship leader.
o In the Old Testament, the job for priests from the tribe of Levi were mostly praying and performing the sacrificial ceremonies on behalf of the Israelites. In other words, the priest represents the people before God. In the New Testament, anyone can come to the throne of Grace without the need of a priest because Jesus Christ has become our mediator between us and God. But the father holds a special position of priesthood because he is the family head. He prays for the protection, forgiveness of sins and blessings from God on behalf of his family.