Sequel to Getting out Working Tittle: South of the River 2018
Sequel to ‘Getting Out’ Working Tittle: ‘South of the River’ 2018
Period 1974 – 1976. MI5 is Britain's domestic secret intelligence service
Main Characters:
Dicky Frame – Field Agent - Based on Anthony Bryan
Charlie Panarti - Field Agent - Based on Dick Smith – Whereabouts Unknown - Real name unknown.
Fiona Renwick – Head of Section – Prohibited – Head of Counter Subversion
Eleanor Mark - Assistant to Fiona Renwick
Reg Ockwell– Security – Reg Ockwell – Deceased – Security & Clean-Up Squad
Ann Armsby – PA to Fiona Renwick - Deceased
Peter Walston - based onCaptain John Colin Wallace
Andy Carrol of the Carrol Foundation based on Gerald Carrol
Squadron Leader Coates-Appleton – basedSquadron Leader John Coates-Appleton
Lord Cowplain – Contributor / Recruiter / Member Secret Management Executive MI5– based on Lord Cowdray/ Viscount Cowdray
BBC ON THIS DAY. March 16. 1976:
Prime Minister Harold Wilson resigns. Harold Wilson, Labour leader for 13 years and prime minister for almost eight, has stunned the political world by announcing his resignation”
Cover
Dicky Frame was way in over his head when he accepted an offer to join the ranks of the British Secret Service. After being held hostage and tortured in the Middle East when his first operation went sour, he decided to leave, but soon found that it was not that easy to quit. He made a pact with his partner Charlie Parnarti to leave MI5, only to be drawn into an international triangle of drugs, arms and politics reaching from Saudi Arabia to Ireland. Less than a year later Dicky and Charlie are drawn into political intrigue and an attempt to blacken Harold Wilson’s government. Dicky and Charlie are no strangers to the ‘dark side’ of life but they need all the black humour they can muster to get through the latest list of perverted demands from the boss Fiona Renwick, the Head of Counter Subversion. Only recently transferred to Fiona’s Desk at special request the two are exhausted already, partly due, perhaps, to the abuse heaped on them just months previously. Dicky and Charlie’s first concern is ‘why has Fionarequested them? – the one’s she has always called Mr. & Mrs. Fuck-up…………
Author Bio
Introduction:
1974-6 - In his second term as Prime Minister burglaries and dirty tricks are carried out against Harold Wilson, his associates and senior staff by MI5 tried to reverse the situation
Dick took the call, as usual, because Charlieflatly refused to stay by a phone. Charlie said it was because he needed to concentrate on his principle purpose for existing -which is to fuck as many women as possible.
‘Charlie had recently stepped-up his constant advice to Dick on how to satisfy women and keep them coming back until they were no longer required.’
Its 04:30 hours Thursday February 1974 >
Dick had been in bed for less than three hours when his pager beeped and then his brand new red plastic rotary dial phone started to scream. Dick snatched the phone, more in fear than hope –
“Hello?” Dick croaked, “How can I help you?”
The voice at the other end had more polish than a whore’s backside.
“Is this Mr Frame?”
“Yes”, Dick managed,
“Ramsbottom, here from head office” The clipped male tone said.
“Who?”
“R-ams-bottom, Mr” the caller said patiently as though he was speaking to a slow child.
”Just think back to those happy school days Mr Frame - St Edmunds - I seem to remember reading in your file – not the best school but I’m sure whoever paid the fee’s meant well,” he tailed off.
“Listen you horse’s ass ...I don’t appreciate being woken up in the middle of my sleep to discuss the merits of British educational alternatives. Get on with it or fuck-off.”
Unflustered Ramsbottom carried on.
“Very well, I just need to ask you a few, brief and I do mean brief security questions.Mr Frame may I have your NI number?”
“Fuck-off!”
“Correct answer Mr Frame – brilliant. Now one more if you will permit me.Yourmother’s maiden name?”“Whore of Babylon.”
“Perfect Mr Frame – I could not have done better myself. Now Frame you are to be at 6 BDS - BR4 by 07:00 hours and bring your 2IC “ Dick knew that 6BDS was6 Bedford Square Bloomsbury West London and BR4 was simply Briefing room 4.
“You will be up in front of the boss and a number of VIP’s so put on your best civvies and make sure your other half is sober.” Ramsbottom said pleasantly.
Dick did not even think about telephoning Charlie.Charlie was too seasoned to pick up a phone or respond to a page. Dick had been suffering working with Charlie for some time and they had a strong bond built on some very nasty shared experiences working in Ireland and the Middle East.
It was about twenty minutes’ drive from Dick’s ‘Charles Church’ Mock Georgian house in Camberley up the A30 toCharlie’s ‘Charles Church’ Mock Georgian house in Sunningdale. They had similar tastes, and they were both mates with the man himself, Charles Church, which made for a good deal.
The houses were more image than substances but - what the heck - the money was pouring in now and the style impressed the knickers off the women – well that’s what Charlie said, anyway.
When Dick arrived at Charlie’s home a little after 04:30, the first thing he noticed were lights on all over the house. This was not so unusual as Charlie often partied after working long hours - always a mystery to Dick who just wanted to try and get some sleep after a long session dealing with the ‘firms’ dirty work. These daysthat seemed always to necessitate the use of Mandrax sometimes known as "Quāālude”.
Dick rang the doorbell on the huge and ornate front door – no answer. He sighed and reverted to the tried and trusted method of shouting through the letterbox.
Assuming there would be at least one female inside
“Good morning darling – is the Lord of the Manor available?”
The second.. thing Dick noticed,when one of Charlie’s girls, dressed in stockings and suspenders and no knickers opened the door,was a young black and very unconscious guy tied to the not very sturdy Charles Church staircase railings.
Dick quickly closed the door behind him, sensing this situation was something that needed discretion – although it seemed he was the only one at all bothered.
Dick refocused his eyes and mind to the girl with no knickers who was now offering him a cup of – well who knows what butthat, in the event, turned out to be a very welcoming coffee.
“No sugar, right?” said the girl.
“Right, how did you know that darling?”
“Because there is no sugar in the house I searched – no honey either – which made Charlie very angry when we got back here about 3 – Charlie said he wanted to sweeten me up but no stash of honey and no sugar either – I looked but everywhere and Charlie said that sugar is no good – too abrasive – what does abrasive even mean mate?”
Dick was always amazed at how Charlie got these girls to parade around like this – stupid or not. At home Dick’s wife insisted they turn the lights-out before they had sex.
“Where is our Charlie darling and... If you don’t mind me asking who is this gentleman, tied to the stairs?”
“Oh, that’s not a gentleman that’s the nigger who tried to mug Charlie last night up West” she said casting the man a disgusted look.
“ I see, well, granted darling… that was very rude of him… but it seems is he unconscious – I mean are you sure he is even still alive?”
“Can’t be dead because one of the other girls was playing with his cock just now and God what a rooster!”
Dick shrugged. “Fair enough, I guess you can’t be dead and get a hard on for long.
Anyway!Entertainingand lovely as you and this conversation are our pretty boy and I need to get to work – where the fuck is he?”
Charlie Panarti appeared at the top of the stairs wearing what looked like a lady’s nightdress – it was pink,baby pink if Dick’s memory served.
“Dickless good morning son – thanks for dropping in – unfortunately I’ve not been home long and not a minute’s rest, as you can see. I’m completely wrecked and not going to be good company. I think I’ll give this one a miss mate.”
“Very funny Charlie,since when you have had a fucking choice? What is going to happen you waste of space is we will clear this lot out and make haste up West. Work to be done my little faggot friend.”
‘It’s OK for you. When you left home the wife was snoring – look at this mess – life is just more complicated for me Dick – what about the nigger for a start?”
“Point taken, this calls for an emergency plan. Is there room for my motor in the garage?”
“Yeah, no problem, I’ll open the doors mate.”
Dick backed his car into the garage and closed the garage doors coming back into the house through the connecting door in the kitchen;he checked the life signs of the unfortunate guy tied to the stair rail.
“Charlie what the fuck have you done with this cunt?”
“This fucking nigger only tried to roll-me outside the front door of Charlie Browns Club – fucking embarrassing mate.”
“I understand your annoyance Charlie but what exactly did you do to him? This fucker has aheart rateof less than 60 BPM and he ain’t walking out here with a skip in his step anytime soon. And we have dragon Eleanor waiting for our arses up West, before we get within striking distance of the lovely Fiona!”
“Listen Dickless the bird with no nickers has some smack – I suggest, as we are pressed for time, we shoot-him-up and dump him on Wimbledon common on the way up”
“Charlie, mate. One of the many psychological problems you have is this tendency to over-react, why not put some fucking clothes on him and just dump him on the common?”
“OK Dick I concede I might be a little OTT on this occasion! The only problem I can foresee is his clothes are gone! I’m sure the tart can lend him some clothes.”
“What do you mean lend him? You think this black bastard is going to return them? – No matter - get your girlfriend to dress him and we will dump him up there – old Bill will just think one more faggot’s beenkicked shitless by skinheads.”
Going back into the garage from the kitchen, Dick and Charlie loaded the almost lifeless young black man into the trunk of Dick’s car and theydrove towardnot to attract attention by driving too slowly. It’s always a nervy time with a body either dead or unconscious in the boot of the car. The last thing they needed was a pull by Mr Plod with Eleanor waiting. Eleanor was less than understanding when it came to tardiness.
“Dick mate, have you noticed how everyone refers to us as Dicky Frame and Charlie Panarti?”
“What’s your pointCharlie?”
“What’s wrong with that?”
It’s not alphabetically correct for one and secondly, I’m superior to you in every conceivable way. Dick, I suggest work on this important issue when we have dropped the coon off.”
‘”OK Charlie,“ Dick knew it was pointless to argue.
Wimbledon Common, far from being deserted, appeared to be a hive of activity.
“Crap, what the fuck are all these people doing here?” Dick said.
“Well at a guess I would say they are looking for someone just like sleeping beauty here, to do over.”
Charlie wound down the window and whistled to a group of skinheadsdraped over a bench, their spliffs little dots of light and the heady aroma of their joints drifting towards the car.”
“Fuck off!” one of them slurred.
“Aw now don’t be like that fellas! We brought you something to play with.” Charlie said.
The men shuffled towards them like drugged up zombies.
“Oh yeah?” one of them said “Well here’s something for you two weirdo fuckers to play with!”
A blade flashed in the light from the street lamp.
Charlie turned to Dick.
“Jeez, you try to do something nice and you just get attitude!”
“Uh, Charlie, I don’t think these guys are messing around.”
Charlie turned the interior light on and beckoned the blade owner with a crooked index finger.
“Last chance now, sure you don’t want something to play with?” He leaned his head slightly sideways towards the back seat.
Warily the skinhead shuffled further forward and peered into the back window. The unconscious black man dressed in a short pleated skirt and boob tube was apparently having a nice dream if the tenting affect on his rah-rah skirt was any indication.
“Hey bros, there’s another weirdo in the back!”
“I resent that.” Charlie said. “So do you want him or not?”
“Why don’t you want him?”
“Places to go, people to see.” Charlie said, “Besides which he could have someone’s eye out with that” he indicated the black mans large erection. “Put that blade away and I’ll give you a hand getting him out.”
The gang member hesitated for a moment and then stuffed the knife through his belt.
Charlie jumped lithely out of the car and opened the back door. Taking a leg each he and the skinheaddragged the black man out onto the verge where the other gang members gathered around staring at the black man’s huge cock now exposed because his skirt had rucked up to his waist as he was pulled from the car.
“Enjoy!” Charlie said jumping back into the car.
“I feel a bit sorry for the jungle bunny.” Dick said as they drove off.
“Ah, fear not, I think the cavalry has arrived in the nick of time.”Charlie said as a blue light illuminated the interior of their retreating car and came to a stop behind them, at the spot where they had dropped off their rampant cross dressing guest.
The rest of the journey into London passed in companionable silence.
“Looking forward to seeing the fragrant Eleanor?” Charlie asked as they pulled up to the curb in Bedford Square. In the building beside them a couple of lights shone out in the dark. Dick could see that meeting room four was one of those lit up and he sighed deeply.
“Courage dear heart!” Charlie laughed, “Let’s go and see if Eleanor is getting on top of her facial hair problem, if not I might have a suggestion or two for her.”
“You wouldn’t.” Dick said although he could not help smiling.
“No I wouldn’t but its good to see smile on your miserable face. God anyone would think you were being asked to put your scrawny arse on the line for Queen and country.”
The houses in Bedford Square look modestly proportioned at first glance but are enormous inside. At that time of night, the parking was easy and only a short distance from the house. Charlie and Dick were greeted at the door by two MOD security personal wear corps of commissionaire’s uniform.Entry formalities completed, they continued along the corridor to briefing room four. Eleanor Mark was in the corridor outside waiting for them.
EleanorMark was a woman of indeterminate age with a bun that was pulled so tight that some of the hairs on her temple had given up the struggle and come loose from their moorings, their roots dangling. At this time there was a distinct look of a five ‘o’clock shadow around her goatee line, something that Dick’s wife had told him was likely caused by polycystic ovary syndrome. As he looked at her Dick found it amazing that any female organ could survive in such an inhospitable host. In contrast to her boss, Fiona Renwick, she was a Rottweiler.
“Eleanor, I swear you get younger every time I see you!” Charlie beamed.
“Shut up and sit down Panarti.”
“Aw Eleanor – don’t be like ….” Dick shuddered as a gaze fuelled by such venom stopped Charlie in his tracks.
“OK you two. God knows if they had anyone else they would sure use them, but you two fuck ups are goingto have to raise your game to be an actual game and deliver this time.”
Charlie was looking at his shoes so Dick said.
“Yes, of course.”
“This is the pre-briefing. Our posh cousins south of the river SIS and TheSouth African Bureau for State Security, often incorrectly given the abbreviation BOSS by journalists, are targeting the PM because of their perception that he is sympathetic to the anti-apartheid movement. The word from Intel is that they are progressing with an operation to undermine the government. Fiona and the other VIP’s will see you soon to give you a full briefing.
Charlie made a tutting sound
“Panarti?”
“Nope, nothing, just disturbed at what you are telling us ma’am.”