April Meeting: April 10, 2012 at 7:30 P.M.
The Hills Church of Christ, 6300 NE Loop 820, North Richland Hills
New Members
We want to extend
a very warm, loving,
and understanding “Welcome”
to our new friends who attended
the March meeting:
Kathy Bond
for the loss of her daughter
Cindy Golus
for the loss of her son
Amy Maddux & Marty Sullivan
for the loss of their son
Greg & Angee Peeples
for the loss of their grandson
Birthday Table
April birthdays
will be celebrated
at this month’s meeting.
If your child’s, grandchild’s,
or sibling’s birthday
is in April,
please feel free to bring
a photo or memento of them
for the birthday table.
The mission
of The Compassionate Friends
is to assist families
in the positive resolution
of grief following the death
of a child of any age
and to provide information
to help others be supportive.
We offer friendship,
understanding and hope
to bereaved parents,
grandparents and siblings.
There is no religious affiliation and
there are no membership dues or fees.
The secret of TCF’s success is simple:
As seasoned grievers reach out
to the newly bereaved,
energy that has been directed inward
begins to flow outward
and both are helped to heal.
The vision
of The Compassionate Friends
is that everyone who needs us
will find us
and everyone who finds us
will be helped.
Picture Button Machine
We will have the picture button machine at April’s meeting. Please bring a 4”x6” copy of a picture of your loved one if you wish to have a button made.
Upcoming Meetings
Apr. 10th – Tear Soup video
May 8th - Angels Across the USA
Tour with Alan Pedersen in the
chapel downstairs
Jun. 12th, 7 P.M. – Butterfly Release
at Holy Family Catholic Church
Love Gifts
A Love Gift is a donation made in honor of a child who has died or as a memorial to a relative or friend. Newsletter sponsorships are available for $250, which is the current cost of printing and mailing over 250 newsletters each month. They are tax deductible and are the only means that allow us to reach out to other bereaved families through books, programs and this newsletter. If you would like, you can specify that your love gift be used for the newsletter, continuing education/workshops, or books for our lending library.
If you wish for your love gift or sponsorship to be listed in a particular month’s newsletter, it must be submitted by the 15th of the previous month.
Send donations to Steve Roberts
3240 Jetranger Rd., Hurst, 76053
TCF Fort Worth Chapter
Steering Committee
Chapter Leaders
Jeff & Marty Martin
817-991-9121
Treasurer
Steve Roberts
817-914-8689
Hospitality
Marty Akeman
817-636-5645
Christine Anderson
817-300-6196
Lydia Moore
817-829-3801
Newsletter
Becky Long
817-275-9297
Librarian
Patty Gallagher
817-861-1491
Committee Members
Charles & Genie Dean
Janet DuPertuis
Steering Committee
Meeting
Our next Steering Committee meeting will be Saturday, May 12th. Membership in the Steering Committee is open to all chapter members. Please join us.
Regional Coordinators
Joan and Bill Campbell
972-935-0673
Fort Worth Chapter Website
www.thecompassionatefriendsfw.com
Need to Talk?
Listed below are parents, grandparents and siblings who
have walked where you are today.
If you are having a difficult day
and just want to talk, please call.
Addiction
Helen
817-431-6964
Auto
Jeff & Marty
817-991-9121
Multiple Loss/
Loss of a Grandchild
Lydia
817-829-3801
Drowning
Debi
817-523-5037
Long Term Illness
Marty
817-636-5645
Homicide/Only Child
Steve
817-914-8689
Suicide/Only Child
Joy
817-453-2227
Suicide
Glinda
817-485-3772
Siblings
Cheryl
817-624-7043
Middle of the night calls
Liz
817-726-3999
Want to share?
We encourage you to submit
your own works of poetry or
prose for our newsletter.
TCF National Office
The Compassionate Friends
P. O. Box 3696
Oak Brook, IL 60522-3696
Fax: 630-990-0246
Toll-free: 877-969-0010
9 A.M. - 5 P.M., CST, Mon.-Fri.
Email:
Website:
www.compassionatefriends.org
The website contains links to TCF’s brochures, e-newsletter, online support community, We Need Not Walk Alone magazine,
“Healing the Grieving Heart” and “The Open to Hope Show” radio archives, webinar archives, chapter websites, and other resources.
Register for Webinar
Grief & Religion - How Religious Symbols and Rituals Can Assist in Our Grieving
April 12th,, 7 P.M.
As bereaved parents, we know that there are times when there are no words to describe the depths of our pain and devastation. As someone has wisely said, “When There Are No Words, Have A Ritual!” Our presenter is Dennis Apple, who lost an 18-year-old son suddenly to mononucleosis in 1991
Reserve your seat now at https://www2.gotomeeting.com/register/883960578
Upcoming webinars include Grandparent Grief and Sibling Grief. Webinar registration opens approximately one month prior to the presentation.
Facebook:
The Compassionate Friends/USA
In Spanish:
Los Amigos Compasivos/USA
Twitter:
Text follow TCFofUSA to 40404
Our April meeting will include the Tear Soup video with time for small group sharing afterwards. Due to time constraints in March, we were unable to begin the video “Good Grief - Living with What We Got,” as planned. We will view the two parts of this video later in the year.
Angels Across the USA Tour
In May bereaved parent, singer and songwriter Alan Pedersen returns to share an evening of music, hope and healing in the chapel downstairs. Alan’s pain and journey toward finding joy again following the death of his only daughter Ashley in 2001 have been the subject matter for four highly acclaimed CDs of original songs. Alan’s message is simple, “We were put on this earth to love them for as long as WE live, not for as long as THEY lived.” He believes that healing comes slow, but does come as we reach out to others who share this journey and offer our hand to help. A gentle mix of humor and straight-from-the-heart talk wrapped around powerful songs about love and loss make a unique, healing and memorable concert experience. Please note that it is not suitable for small children.
Butterfly Release in June!
Our annual butterfly release will be held on June 12th, at 7 P.M. at Holy Family Catholic Church. Join us to release a butterfly in memory of your loved one. Feel free to bring other family members, children and friends to this special event. We ask that you bring a dish to share afterwards.
Firemen’s 5K
The 14th annual Firemen’s 5K will be held at 8 A.M. on Saturday, May 26th at Arborlawn United Methodist Church, 5001 Briarhaven, Fort Worth.
All proceeds from this race of over 800 runners benefit the Fort Worth Chapter of The Compassionate Friends and The WARM Place. This is a major source of funds for our chapter.
Volunteers are also needed to pass out packets, point out the route or distribute water to the runners. If you can commit to a Thursday evening meeting and the Saturday morning of Memorial Day weekend, please call Lori Carver at 817-819-5530 or e-mail .
We invite you to join us and walk or run in memory of your loved one. Online registration is now available at www.active.com. Registration fees are $18, until May 16th, $20 after May 16th, and $25 on race day.
A registration form and pledge sheet are at the back of this newsletter.
Refreshments
If you would like to bring refreshments to an upcoming meeting, please sign up at this month’s meeting or call one of our hospitality committee members. Many members bring refreshments during their loved one’s birth month, to celebrate their birthday with the group.
Please note that drinks, cups, napkins, plates, and utensils are always provided by our chapter.
Registration for National
Conference Now Open
Registration is now available online or by mail for The Compassionate Friends 35th National Conference/ 5th International Gathering July 20-22, 2012 in beautiful Costa Mesa, California! We recommend registering early as this is likely to be one of the best-attended U.S. TCF National Conferences in history with more than 1500 expected at the Hilton Orange County Costa Mesa Hotel.
If you're seeking a way to remember and grieve for your child, sibling, or grandchild with people who understand and don't expect you to be "back to normal," why not give yourself a gift this summer by attending the Conference? This is a unique opportunity to be surrounded by a safe-haven that comes along only once a year.
Combine your California visit with a pre-conference excursion on Thursday, July 19 to the Huntington Library, art collection and botanical gardens, plus Monday, post-conference transportation to Disneyland (special discounted tickets available to purchase online direct from Disneyland).
TCF has also arranged with American Airlines to provide our attendees a 5% discount. The valid travel dates for this discount are July 14-27, 2012 and apply to flights to John Wayne Santa Anna (SNA), LAX, and Ontario (ONT) Airports.
The national website has complete details on the excursions and the airfare discount, as well as a conference brochure with a list of workshops, schedule and registration form.
Tuesday to Friday
On Tuesday I never told you
I got your letter in the mail
On Tuesday I never told you
All the news I had to tell
On Tuesday I never asked you
Were there more gifts to buy
On Tuesday I never asked you
I only wondered why
On Tuesday I never asked you
What time you would be home
Because on Tuesday it all ended
And you were suddenly gone
On Wednesday I can’t remember
How many came and went
I sat with solemn graveness
Knowing good times were spent
On Wednesday I stood with family
To pick your casket with care
I stood with so much pain
Not wanting to see you there
On Thursday my heart broke
When I saw you lying there
How could this have happened
It was all so unfair
Now Friday was the hardest
Knowing the time was near
What really was happening
Will never be that clear
How we got through it I wonder
When we left you there
The heaviness inside us
Was too much to bear
I always feel sad and lonely
Many tears run down my face
You filled our lives with laughter
And no one can take your place
How do you say good-bye
To someone like you
With you He took our joy
And all our happiness too
Every day is Tuesday to Friday
With it all still so real
But no one really knows
How we really feel
I think the hardest of all is
To know you’ll never be here
But we’ll never say good-bye
To our sister so dear
By Lisa Anne Sockwell
In memory of her only sister, Ashley Marie
Reprinted from Camden Co., NJ Newsletter
The Mended Heart
The heart is oh so fragile,
although the muscle’s strong.
It goes on beating even though
continued life seems wrong.
When devastation makes its mark
and chisels in the pain.
It seems as though the heart will not
ever know joy again.
Good News! The heart will mend itself,
but not just like before.
Remember, like a broken bone,
original is no more.
There is a tender spot in both
where once the gap was wide.
The beating heart that gives us life
has courage on its side.
And as the broken bone may ache
because of rain or cold,
The heart may ache with longing
for the one whose bell has tolled.
There is no guarantee that life
will ever be the same,
Bur when you do find joy in life,
the heart should feel no shame.
By Karen Longbrake
TCF, Hardin Co., Ada, OH
Prayer for spring
Like springtime, let me unfold
And grow fresh and new
From this cocoon of grief
That has been spun around me.
Help me face the harsh reality of
Sunshine and renewed life
As my bones still creak from
The winter of my grief.
Life has dared to go on around me.
As I recover from the insult
Of Life’s continuance,
I readjust my focus to
Include recovery and growth
As a possibility in my future.
Give me strength to break out of
The cocoon of my grief.
But may I never forget it as
The place where I grew my wings,
Becoming a new person
Because of my loss.
By Janice Heil
TCF, Vancouver
“We cannot prevent the birds of sorrow from flying around our heads, but we must keep them from building nests in our hair.”
Chinese Proverb
Time for Spring Cleaning
The smell of spring is in the air. At your house it’s probably lilacs, lilies and hollyhocks, but at my house, it’s Lysol, Lemon Pledge and Clorox. These fragrances are the harbingers of my favorite secular celebration, spring cleaning. I admit it friends; I love to clean.
I learned the joys of tidiness at my mother’s (housemaids’) knee. She is Norwegian, and for centuries the women in her family have dedicated their lives to cleanliness. Early in my indoctrination, my mother taught me the old Norwegian expression “Ingen kysten skogen mogen!” which loosely translated means, “When in doubt, toss it out.”
I’m pretty sentimental myself but, until recently, I was never a saver of things. That changed when Blake died. I found that I could not part with anything that his little hands might have touched, from his childish scribblings to lucky rocks to plastic dinosaurs.
Shortly after he died, I went through all of Blake’s clothes and gave away his newest and Sunday best. The things I saved were his play clothes. The shorts and shirts with mud and pizza stains that never quite came out, his favorite pajamas, and his Charlie Brown underwear. My mother and I gently packed them away in tissue paper as if they were the finest silks and linens. Sometimes when I open that drawer, I think I catch a sniff of Blake’s musky little-boy scent. The yearning it awakens in me is almost more than I can bear.