Gary and Brooke met at a Cubs baseball game and began dating. They live in a condo in Chicago. Gary and his two brothers own a touring company and Brooke is an artist
And works at an Art Museum.
Gary comes home and Brooke is cooking.
GARY
Hey Honey!
BROOKE
Hi!
GARY
How’s it going?
BROOKE
It’s good
Gary enters the kitchen
GARY
Oh wow, you got a lot happenin’
He puts the lemons she requested on the counter.
BROOKE
I know! Very exciting.
They kiss
GARY
I’m starving
Gary picks some food up with his hands.
BROOKE
Oh careful that’s really, that’s very hot
GARY
Ohh! That’s hot hot hot hot hot.
BROOKE
Yep.
GARY
Jesus.
BROOKE
Hey you gotta really, you should get ready k?
GARY
Oh, You look great.
BROOKE
Thank you.
Gary goes to get a beer from the refrigerator.
GARY
Got a lot of nice stuff.
Got a pizza.
BROOKE
All kinds of stuff.
GARY
Terrific.
Gary leaves the kitchen.
BROOKE
I just need you to decide what to…
You know, I did everything.
Gary turns the tv on. Brooke looks in the bag to find Gary
Only brought her three lemons.
BROOKE
Gary?
GARY
Yeah?
GARY (cont’d)
(at the tv)
Oh, come on! Really?
BROOKE
You got three lemons.
GARY
What my baby wants, my baby gets
You know that
BROOKE
Yeah, but I wanted 12.
Baby wanted 12.
GARY
Why would you want 12 lemons?
BROOKE
Because I’m making a 12 lemon centerpiece.
GARY
So, no one’s actually even eating them?
They’re just show lemons?
BROOKE
Yeah. They’re just show lemons.
Shown in the center of the table.
I’m glad you find that amusing,
But I cannot fill a vase with only three lemons.
GARY
Well, can’t you just use, like,
Maybe a drinking glass?
BROOKE
I’m not going to use a drinking…
GARY
We could have a smaller version of a centerpiece
BROOKE
I’m not going to use a drinking glass for our
Centerpiece.
GARY
You know what?
I’ve got an idea.
Why don’t we go ahead and scratch the centerpiece idea
Altogether, because the chicken that burnt my mouth. Could
Maybe use a bit of lemon on top of it. Guess what?
Now we’ve made a better meal versus something visually
Nice to look at.
Brooke realizes that Gary is watching sports and
Drinking a beer instead of getting ready and helping her.
BROOKE
What are you do…
What’s happening here?
What are you doing?
What are you doing?
Gary begins to studder.
GARY
Oh, I had such a long day on the bus.
I need a little bit of down time.
My feet are killing me
BROOKE
Gary, come on, my feet are killing me too
GARY
I’m exhausted.
BROOKE
I worked all day. Went to the market.
I cleaned this entire condo and then I’ve been cooking
For the last three hours.
Come on, help set the table.
She walks back into the kitchen.
GARY
Sweetheart.
BROOKE
What?
She walks back in the living room
GARY
You’ve done such a great job already. Don’t
You want to just finish it yourself and
Have that personal power of that accomplishment?
BROOKE
Set the table
Brooke walks into the kitchen
GARY
Listen to me.
Do you think Michelangelo, right,
Was painting the sixteenth Chapel, that he said,
“Hey guys, you know, I did pretty good on
The first 15 chapels, but why don’t you help me
Design this one. And maybe you could help me…
Give me a brush and you guys can grab brushes, and we can all
Make a great chapel.”
Uh Uh. No he didn’t And you wanna know what the
Results were? A masterpiece.
BROOKE
Okay. It’s the Sistine Chapel not the sixteenth,
And I bet when Michelangelo asked for 12 brushes
They didn’t bring him three.
GARY
Yeah. Okay, all the talking is really
Starting to drain me, and now I’m going
To have to watch the highlights later
To see what I missed here.
They began to overlap their replies.
BROOKE
Honey, Look, Gary, just…
GARY
Down time’s important
BROOKE
Gary please just take a shower, okay?
BROOKE (cont’d)
Cause this is what I don’t
Want to have happen.
I don’t want the doorbell to ring.
I’m then forced to answer the door,
Entertain people, and I’m still cooking dinner.
GARY
Yeah.
BROOKE
Okay?
GARY
You’re absolutely right. Let’s do that.
The second this inning’s over…
BROOKE
Gary.
GARY
There’s one out already.
BROOKE
They’re going to be here in 20 minutes.
GARY
Baby have you ever seen a shower of mine take more
Than four minutes?
BROOKE
Yes, I have. Come on.
Doorbell rings
BROOKE
Oh, great!
They’re here. Okay.
Gary chugs his beer.
BROOKE(cont’d)
Table’s not set.
Dinners not ready.
Would you please just let my parents in?
GARY
I gotta jump in the shower
BROOKE
What?
Doorbell rings again
GARY
I gotta go
Gary jogs down the hallway
BROOKE
Gary. Gary.
Doorbell rings again.
Brooke sighs and goes offstage to answer it.