Coaching to Hold Others Accountable

Holding people accountable can be one of the most terrifying tasks of management. In our society, we tend to take responsibility for the feelings of others. Since holding people accountable involves the potential of hurting feelings, we tend to shy away from it and procrastinate. There can be a lot of anger and frustration in this area. As managers, we tend do what we have committed to do. When an employee or team member shows little or no responsibility, it’s frustrating. I have witnessed many teams dissolve or fail to achieve results because they didn’t or couldn’t hold each other accountable.

There have been reports of business owners knowing that an employee was stealing from the company but they were so afraid of confronting that person that they let this go on for months. When an employee is hurting a company and its reputation, or has an obvious clash in values, other team members’ attitudes can be negatively affected. Not holding an employee accountable can quickly lead to a quick disintegration of leadership authority and respect in the eyes of others.

Here are a number of key points concerning holding people accountable:

1. Employees will assume that their behavior is correct unless it is corrected.

2. Holding people accountable is 90% communication and problem solving and 10% discipline.

3. You will never feel comfortable holding people accountable. There will always be a point of hesitation right before you hold someone accountable but as a leader, your job is to forge ahead.

Our main fear in holding people accountable is that our interaction with the employee will be emotional. To get over this fear we must understand that there has to be emotion, or no change can take place.

Conflict usually occurs around ideas, but coaching involves emotion and we fear the emotion, yet without it we cannot understand the problem and find a solution. When someone is not performing correctly they are either unconscious of what they are supposed to be doing (Unconscious Incompetent) or they are choosing not to perform as required (Conscious Incompetent).

Therefore, this is either a talent developmentneed or an attitude problem. When we hold someone accountable we are simply bringing to the forefront the desired behavior and making it know that this is what is required. We are allowing them to become conscious of the requirements andreinforcing the reason for our company existence and their job. They can choose to comply or to play the blame game. To force this action, there must be some form of emotion.

As managers, you are the spark that raises this consciousness. As you do this more and more, it will get somewhat less painful, yet the uncomfortable feelings will never totally go away. There tends to not be any gain without some pain.Remember that successful people do the things that failures dislike and refuse to do. A manager cannot manage without performance coaching and holding people accountable. It is a high priority to master this skill.

The best way to hold someone accountable is state the problem behavior that’s occurring and then say “Tell me about it (TMAI).” Or “Help me Understand (HMU)”

To really be effective and nonjudgmental, use the 3-step feedback model. For example: “Pam, I have been noticing that you and Sara have been having harsh words. Tell me about it.” After stating this, be quiet and listen. What you are doing is going right to the core. You are taking the problem behavior and putting it on the person’s shoulders without saying they are to blame or it is all their fault. You are simply stating what you have observed. By saying “Tell me about it”, you are opening the door to all possibilities.

In some cases, an employee may be showing up to work late because of a family issue, but he or she has not told anyone about it. By approaching the problem without assumptions, you won’t look bad if they do have a legitimate concern or need some skill development. In 90% of the cases just using the ‘tell me about it’ or “help me understand” method will solve the behavior. You have brought it to a conscious level and there has been some emotion. The person now has clarity about what is required and expected. You can now work together towards solving the problem. And 99% of the time you and the employee will feel better afterwards! This is even true if the person refused to do what you needed him or her to do. At least now you know where the person stands.

The Five Step Performance Coaching Process

  • Approach people within 48 hours of problem behaviors.
  • Use the TMAI or HMU method
  • Listen.
  • Follow up.
  • Recognize good behavior – catch people doing something right – to reinforce new behavior changes.

Editor’s Note: What we ultimately want to create is a culture where everyone on the team holds each other accountable instead of coming to management with issues and problems. To do that, we need to build trust and get everyone on the same bus and in the right seats – in other words, they need to commit to a process or action step, even if they don’t agree with it 100%. The leadership team still needs to make good decisions, but people need to feel comfortable expressing ideas, asking questions and sharing insights. If you work on those things, accountability will come too, but keep in mind that it is the hardest skill to learn. This process is much easier if you select prospects who are a good fit with core behavioral values in the hiring process.

Kristine Ranger, 7