Goodrich/ Sordid Secrets/ Chapter 34/ Page 1
Chapter Thirty Four
“Do you think it’s safe for us to leave Tessa with Sara to dress?” Marc grinned, while straightening his crisp white cravat.
Colin didn’t raise his head as he muttered, “if only Sara rubbed off on Tessa.”
“You’re in a foul mood.”
Colin didn’t answer, but re-buckle his shoe to tighten its fit. There was a light tap at the sitting roomdoor and Tessa entered in a dazzling pale blue and cream gown. Her hair was neatly pinned in ringlets on her head with a tiny diamond band sweeping her blond tresses from her crown. She was stunning, though Colin wasn’t enchanted. His mood was far too rotten to be lightened by a pretty face—even one as extraordinary as Miss Gray’s.
Tessa tapped her fan in her gloved hand. “Lord Marcus, I didn’t know you were courting Lady Cawood.”
“Is Sara gossiping to you in the next room?” he sighed.
She turned to Colin. “Did you know your friend was courting—”
“I knew,” he curtly interrupted.
“Well, you mustn’t keep her in Dover, Marcus. She must come join you here or how will this suit ever improve?”
Marcus laughed at her concerned tone. “There isn’t a commitment, yet, my lady.”
“That’s not what Sara says,” she hinted. “Please Colin, convince Marcus to bring this girl here and marry her in London.”
“Marriage?” Marcus nearly choked.
Colin lifted his harsh eyes to her. “I shall do no such thing as to give him advice or blessing, if it were to lead him to marriage.”
“Colin!” Marcus gasped.
The room fell silent. Colin knew he was out of line. His friend and fiancé knew he was as well. Feeling his direct and pointed comment, Tessa immediately turned and dashed from the room. Marcus pushed his friend’s shoulder, completely confounded by his vicious words.
“What is wrong with you?”
Colin sighed and rested his head in his hands. “Marc, I just snapped.”
“Well, you need to go apologize to Tessa. What has gotten into you? You’ve been unpleasant all week, especially today. Have you and Tessa been arguing much lately?”
Colin just shook his head.
“Then what is it?”
“You wouldn’t believe me if I told you.” Colin lifted his blue gaze to Marc.
“I’d believe almost anything you told me to explain why you are deliberately being cruel to Tessa. You may be many things, my friend but cruel is not one of them.” Pulling a chair to sit near him, Marc offered, “Colin, I’ve known you for more than a decade. Our families have been to war side by side together in this society. All this time you’ve never hidden anything from me.”
“Well I’ve never had anything of worth to hide, contrary to societal belief.” Colin’s tone turned sharply stern “But may I tell you of something that will shock you?”
“Of course.”
Colin clasped his friend’s arms and warned, “Marc, you must swear to not only listen to me, but hold true to such confidence as my friend. And I swear that when you’re in trouble, I’ll be there.”
Marcus began to become uneasy. “What’s this about?”
“I found her.”
“Who?”
Colin rose and began to pace in explanation. “I had conceded my search, but she came to me.”
“What on earth are you speaking of? I haven’t seen you this unsettled since…” Marcus looked to at first to be wracking his brain, but he slowly leaned back in his chair as if he understood completely. “You can’t honestly be speaking of that girl from Lisbon… what was her name?”
“Nic.”
“Ah, yes, Nic. You foundthis Nic here in England? That can’t be a coincidence.”
“She found me, though she was in the last place I’d ever look.”
Marcus furrowed a brow, completely puzzled.
“She’s privy to our circle.”
“She’s a part of the ton? That’s a good thing, right?”
“Not with her.” Colin ran his fingers through his hair in frustration.
“But if your Nic is society, then you can pursue her in a more honorable fashion than as some wench you picked up on the streets of Portugal—”
One look from Colin stopped Marc mid-sentence. Colin ended his stride, facinghis friend fully to finally confess. “Marc, I call her Nic, as you know… as in Nicolette, as in Noble.”
“You lie!” Marcus shot out of his chair, dashing to Colin. He fought between screaming and gasping in shock at his friend’s news. “But she hates you. Wait—you hate her! I saw the hatred at Stonefield.”
“It’s all a cover.” Colin fell back into his chair with a thud.
“A cover? There is more? You have been with her? A Noble?”
“A little less than two months. I found her at Lady Katherine’s London debut.”
Marcus shook his head, still in disbelief. He covered his face with his hands in order to hide from this admission. The pieces of Colin’s entanglement were slowly coming to him, as if the past two months of erratic moods and disappearances were finally clicking in Marcus’s mind. “I now know why we stayed at Stonefield.”
“So I could be with Nic.”
“This is mad, Colin. Your father—let alone her brothers – will destroy the both of you if they discover the truth.” Marcus had taken Colin’s place in pacing.
“No one should uncover anything. Nic and I broke our relations last week.”
“Which explains your foul mood.”
“Marc, you don’t understand. I’ve always believed I at least had a choice in my life until I met Nic, but she has all control over me. I love her.”
“Love?”
“Love.”
Marcus’s features softened and he finally began to understand what his friend had been enduring all this time. Marcus returned to his chair next to Colin and sincerely asked, “then why have you broken the relationship?”
“She does not feel the same.”
Marcus’s eyes suddenly looked worried for his friend.
“Regardless, we decided to end this affair after it became too tangled and complicated. As Tessa is my diversion for this affair, Nic also has also endured the lies and deceit of her own cover for our affair.”
“The Earl of Brinner.”
“Yes, but Tessa is catching onto our scheme. I’ve made so many mistakes in attempting to hide this affair, though I don’t think she has it solved. It is all unraveling, so we must change the game between us before it is all discovered.”
“I’m afraid to ask what now?”
“Nic and I have a plan to assure that Tessa never suspects Nicolette Noble as my mistress. So Nic and I are going to stage a feud between our families tonight at the ball. Tessa assumes with the rest of the world that I hate her for her last name. But this shall wipe any doubt from her simple mind.”
Marcus furrowed a brow and took a moment of silence to think through all of these new actualities he had been completely oblivious from. “Colin, if you’re trying to end your affair with Nicolette and solidify your relationship with Tessa, then why did you just snap at her?”
“That’s what I can’t even explain to you, my friend.” Colin rose to find his dress jacket. He kept his eyes from Marc’s as he confessed. “I’m not sure that I want to end it with Nic.”
“You must!”
Colin knew this. There was no doubt between Colin and Marcus on this fact. But he quietly whispered, “But I can’t stay away from her.”
“It must end, Colin.” Marcus stood to face him. “Nicolette and you could never be a match in society. Your father would rather have you both vanish and I can’t imagine how Alexander—let alone Asher – Noble would react. They are incredibly protective of their younger sister.”
“I know.”
Marc again paced the room. “No, not just protective, but I’ve heard stories where Asher has been all these years. If even a few are true then you would prefer to face the wrath of your father. Oh, I can’t believe any of this!”
“I know. And I regret that I’ve burdened you with this secret. But I need to hear your reasoning. I’m far too involved in my feelings for her toever return to the dismal life I held before. She’s permanently under my skin, Marcus.”
“No, Colin, this talk is mad. Is Nicolette willing to risk the same as you?”
He had never asked himself what she was willing to risk. Nicolette risked her reputation, by sneaking into his room at Stonefield, then again when she followed him to London. She told him that they must part, when she broke their affair. But when they contrive this entire plan for the benefit, she wept for hate of losing him. Could she be as confused as he about their dissolution? No, she must have just been confused over the situation, for Nicolette never returned his professions of love. Colin shook his head, “I know she doesn’t want to endure all the secrets, her family is exhaustively persistent with this Earl.”
“Then you must stick to your plan to end this. As she has chosen the Earl, your duty lies with Tessa.”
“Forget duty! When can do I get to be content? I have followed duty in school, profession and now marriage.”
“There isn’t a choice, Colin.”
“Why?”
Marcus raised his voice to match his friend’s. “Because that’s the way things must be. You are a member of society. We all face these consequences. Are you willing to risk yours, Tessa’s and Nicolette’s family reputation on this?”
Colin fell back in the chair, knowing his friend was right. “I hate this.”
“I wish it were different for you.” Marcus clasped his shoulder in support and then moved to sit beside him. “Look, friend, just finish the plan tonight. Tomorrow we can abandon it all again and flee all of this. We can go by Kenton Park, for Dane would love to join us.”
Colin whispered lowly, “Do you think she will leave my mind, just because Iwon’t see her?”
Marcus was growing exasperated. “No, but over time it will change.”
They both took a long sigh to compose themselves. Colin ran his hands through his thick hair, as Marcus sat back in his chair. Colin wasn’t sure why he had even confessed to Marcus; his ideas of society were so far from his own. Colin supposed he was just looking for someone to confide in. Marcus had always been the man he went to with his manifold of predicaments, but this was beyond anything he had ever known. Perhaps his friend was valid and he just couldn’t concede to what he must do.
Marcus broke the silence by offering, “Colin, I apologize for losing my temper, but you’ve seemed to have lost all reasoning.”
“No, you’re right. If my closest friend can’t understand what I feel for Nic, then the rest of this false society certainly can’t.” He slowly rose from his chair and began to check himself in the mirror.
Marcus’s large dark blue eyes followed him as he tried to insist, “Colin, I understand. I just also know the dangers behind your pursuit. Everyone will lose in the end.”
“I know,” he muttered, then turned back to his friend’s grave complexion. “All I need to do now is pretend I don’t love her. Pretend she doesn’t creep into my mind with every thought.”
“I’m sorry, Colin, but it’s for the best.”
“I know. I’ll just keep this constant charade. And Marcus, only you and I shall know that I’ve sworn to never forget.” Colin progressed to the door of their dressing room, but Marcus hailed him to stop.
“Colin, I…”
“No, it’s all understood my friend. Now, I need to apologize to Tessa and pretend I love her instead.”