Bonding with Baby Without Co-Sleeping

Bonding with your new baby is important. Spending quality time with your new baby helps them feel loved and safe and is critical for the baby’s healthy growth and development. Each baby is different and responds differently to parents. Bonding takes time and you might get frustrated. Many parents want to sleep with their baby to bond with the new baby. However, co-sleeping can be dangerous and isn’t a safe option for bonding. Try some of these bonding tips instead of co-sleeping.

Tips for Bonding

When Feeding Your Baby:

  • Breastfeed your baby if at all possible – this creates specific times for mom and baby to bond
  • Use feeding times to look into your baby’s eyes, smile, and talk to your baby

Pay Attention To Your Baby:

  • It’s important that you pay lots of attention to your baby – you will learn their cries, expressions, etc. and learn how to respond
  • Listen to the baby’s cries – lots of crying is normal for a new baby – you will learn the difference in the cries and how to respond – this helps the baby learn to trust you and attach to you – you are NOT a bad parent if your baby cries and you don't know why – that's normal!
  • Your baby will grow and change quickly – paying lots of attention will help you bond with them as they grow

Spend Time With Your Baby:

  • Babies love to cuddle – spend time holding them each day – reading books, singing, or rocking them to sleep are good ways to spend time together even when your baby is very young
  • “Wear” your baby – wearing your baby in a sling allows you to be up close and personal with your baby while still doing other things – be sure to use the sling safely and properly to avoid injury to you or the baby(slings should not be worn with infants under 4 months, was born prematurely, or was less than 5 pounds, 8 oz. when born)

Be Creative!

  • Try baby massage –the skin-to-skin contact with your new baby helps you communicate with your new baby – great way for dad to bond too!
  • Play on the floor with your baby – “tummy time” is important for your baby’s growth and development – interact with them during this time
  • Read, sing and play peek-a-boo – babies love human voices
  • As your baby gets older, you can change how you interact with them – use toys, puzzles and books to interact with your baby

Other Resources

These sites can provide you with more information on bonding with your new baby. Remember, if you have concerns about your baby's bonding or attachment; be sure to talk to your doctor or your baby's pediatrician.

General Bonding Information:

Interacting and Playing With Your Baby:

Reacting to Crying:

  • purplecrying.info

Baby Massage: