Synthesis AP
These are my observations from scoring the synthesis question for AP in Daytona, Florida. There were 900 teachers and we were divided into three groups by question. The synthesis question was “What are the effects of advertising?”
Introductions: Things NOT to do: Examples taken from student essays (in italics)
1. Do not use source material in the introduction. This includes the wording of the prompt. Many students used the prompt as a springboard and copied it almost word for word. This was not considered plagiarism but was very repetitive for the reader.
2. Avoid these type of openings: *
Since the beginning of human existence
From the beginning of time
Advertising has been around for centuries
*Most of the scorers do not believe the cavemen advertised clubs and animal skin attire on their cave walls.
3. Avoid weak positions/thesis
I am just indifferent really but lean toward good effects
This writer is more fixed on a neutral position
4. Avoid the obvious—the following two beginnings were in about 50% of the essays. Tell the reader something she doesn’t know.
Advertising is everywhere
Advertising is a major part of everyday life
Things TO do
1. Spend time crafting a thesis statement that has complexity or originality. Metaphors are usually appreciated. The following thesis statements are from high scoring papers.
Advertisements are the plague of modern society with the highest casualties being individuality, and personal willpower.
Advertising is like an insidious weed.
The naïve assume that advertisers seek to take advantage of existing demand, but the real goal is to create demand. By appealing to subconscious insecurities and desires, advertisers create eager customers for the products they are pitching.
2. This was from a 6 paper
Advertising benefits society by informing the public of important world events and problems, creating another source of income for small businesses, and by boosting the economy through promotion of free trade.
3. This is from a 4 paper.
Advertising has many positive effects.
4. Use an anecdote to start your essay
The day after the recent Super Bowl, my friend and I were discussing the game. While my friend could not remember the exact score of the game, he could, however, recall his favorite commercials.
5. It is better to shorten your intro than to talk in generalities that will sound like every other student’s essay. Some students use a bullet thesis and that is acceptable. This means the intro virtually consists of the thesis without extra padding. Then the student can spend more time on the body.
Body
1. You must use at least 3 sources—we do count them. If you use less than 3 you can not receive higher than a 4.
2. Use sources sparingly—the readers know the sources by heart, so it becomes repetitive. The readers are interested in YOUR commentary. Some students virtually only used the sources and got a low score
3. Unless you have a good reason, do not use quotes from source material as your first sentence or you last sentence in a body paragraph. You should be directing the material—not the source material.
4. Don’t spend time summarizing the source material. Again, the readers KNOW the source material by heart—we want your analysis of the source material as it relates to your thesis.
5. Many essays receiving high scores made references to philosophy and economics. References to Thoreau and Adam Smith and others added depth to the discussion.
6. For your commentary, use your OWN examples. Again, tell us something we don’t know--a story about an anorexic friend, your own brainwashing through advertising as a child.
Conclusion
1. Make it short.
2. Aim for closure not a repetition of your introduction
3. No Blah, blah, blah
In conclusion, advertising is everywhere. . .