Title: The Real World: New Jersey
Author: Anny again lol
Genre: Comedy mostly. and of course, what's an Anny fic without some Smut? . oh and Drama?
Rating: R
Summary: What happens when people stop being polite and start getting real? Okay, this is basically a parody of The Real World, one of the stupidest reality shows out there . It is full of common stereotypes, so I hope you're not bothered by that . oh and everything that happens, is happening on camera, unless I say its not, like when they're having sex or something lol. I hope you get the beeping out of the bad words!!
Disclaimer: I don't own MCR. I own everything else in my crazy imagination though
Note: Please tell me if I should continue this and give me feedback. I just started writing it today. Episode one is long, so I divided it into two parts.
Enjoy!
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Episode One: Meeting Strangers
First Ever Confessional: Introduce Yourselves
Gerard: Hi. My name is Gerard. I’m 24 years old from Belleville, New Jersey and I’m gay. I think. *smiles sheepishly*
Tara: My name is Tara. I’m 21 years old. I’m from Jacksonville, Florida and I wanted to be on the show so I could change for the better and stop strippin’. *looks down at own boobs in awe*
Frank: My name is Frank. I’m 19 years old. I’m from Belleville, New Jersey and I’m here because…well I don’t really know why I’m here. *stares blankly at camera through fringe*
Aris: My name is Arisleida. But please call me Aris. I’m 18 years old from Brooklyn, New York. I’m here to make new friends and hopefully have a life-changing experience. *smiles*
Ray: Hey there! Ray here from Kearny, New Jersey. I’m 24 and I’m on the show because I want to have some fun and meet hot chicks. *thumbs up*
Bob: Yo, yo I’m Bob. I’m 23, from Chi-town. And I want to meet new people. Nah. I just wanted to get out of this really crappy job I had at Burger King. Goodbye Burger (beep) King! * throws up random gang signs*
Jessebelle: My name is Jessebelle. Don’t call me Jess or anything else but Jessebelle. I’ll break your fingers one by one if you do. *puffs on a cigarette and looks menacingly at camera*
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Aris’s POV
I’m standing at the Port Authority Bus Terminal, my fingers literally shaking. I’m supposed to meet someone named Gerard, (what kind of name is that anyway?) one of my roommates. I didn’t think I’d ever actually get to be on this show. I’m from the worst neighborhood in all of Brooklyn, and it was a priority to get out after high school. So there I was, graduated from high school with nothing to do. I heard about the auditions for a Real World New Jersey and thought “Why the hell not?” A chance to meet new people, a change of scenery, and possibly a night without gunshots ringing in my ears. It was so enticing that I send in a tape and viola! Here I am.
In my hand is a small suitcase with the only clothes I have. I’m hoping that it’ll last the four months that I’m here. If not, it’s back to Brooklyn to go shopping at the thrift store for new stuff.
I can’t seem to stop my hands from sweating as I situate myself on a bench outside the bus terminal. Meeting new people always excites me, I love finding out where they’re from, what’s their background. It’s one reason why I want to be a journalist. But I’ve been waiting for at least an hour and still no sign of Gerard. He has the key to our new house, which I know will be incredible, as these Real World houses always are.
I look at my watch. “He was supposed to be here an hour ago. Where the hell is he?” I ask myself. I feel a tap on my shoulder.
I turn to the right and find a rather cute-looking guy standing there. He has black hair and possibly the most incredible green eyes I’ve ever seen. He smiles at me nervously. He is clad entirely in leather with a Spiderman t-shirt under his jacket and a black paperboy hat, never mind it being a really hot day in June.
I give him a huge smile and stand up. “You must be Gerard. I’m Aris.” I give him my hand to shake, but he ignores it and hugs me. I’m taken aback but I eventually hug him also, patting his back awkwardly. White folks sure are friendly.
He steps back and says, “It’s great to meet you Aris. Where are you from?”
“I’m from New York. You?”
“Right here in Jersey.” He pauses for a second. “I’m gay.” He blurts out.
“That’s nice.” What a way to introduce yourself. I feel like laughing, but I don’t want to be rude.
He smiles nervously again. “Sorry, that kind of just slipped out.”
“It’s okay.” I laugh. “Let’s get going to the house. I can’t wait to see it!”
“Yeah, me neither.” He picks up my suitcase and two of his own.
“Thanks.”
“No problem.” He’s struggling with all of the bags, his face bright red.
“You need help?”
“No I’m fine.” He says, barely able to breathe.
“Okay then.” Gerard makes me laugh. He’s one funny dude. I have a feeling we’re going to get along great.
Ray’s POV
This is gonna be great. Four months in a cool house with 3 hot chicks, a vacation to somewhere or other, and partying every single day. It’s like a dream.
The real reason why I came on the show is to party. Hard. I need some enjoyment in life after graduating in the top of my class in college and essentially being a total dork for most of my life. There, I admitted it. I’m a dork. I’ve never had a real girlfriend (unless my blow-up doll counts). I’ve been getting pretty buff these last few months though. I flex my arms a little. Oh yeah, look at those guns.
I’m waiting at NewarkAirport for some girl named Jessebelle from Detroit. Those Detroit chicks are sex-crazy I’ve heard.
I see a scary looking girl approaching me. She looks like one of those hardcore death metal heads. She’s wearing combat boots and a long black trench coat. There are tattoos on what little parts I can see of her body and she has piercing in places where I didn’t even think you could get a piercing. Her hand, her wrists, and both sides of her mouth are all covered in metal. Ouch. Hopefully this isn’t Jessebelle.
“I’m Jessebelle.” She says unceremoniously. Her hand is on her hip and she’s carrying what looks to be a huge duffel bag stuffed with a dead body of some sort. I wouldn’t be surprised if it was.
“I’m Ray, your new roommate.” I hold my hand out, which she steadfastly ignores and walks past me. Yeah, she’s not exactly the nicest person in the world. She leaves behind her duffel back for me to carry. It weighs at least 3 tons. We walk to the van that’s waiting for us with my stuff already inside of it.
“Um, any reason in particular why you’re on the show?” I ask politely.
“No.” she says, not even bothering to look at me.
“Okay. Where are you from?”
“I think you know where I’m from. Now stop asking me questions. By the way, did something crawl onto your head and die?”
I stop walking and place my hand on my helmet of hair. I feel embarrassed. People have always made fun of my hair, but its what I’m known for, my huge afro. I wouldn’t be me if I ever cut it. “No.”
“Then you should get your head examined. I have a feeling that thing is gonna bite someone someday.” She laughs at her own joke. I can’t help but notice how her green eyes light up when she does. She’d be pretty if she weren’t such a bitch.
“Haha. Very funny.” My face is hot. I let go of her bag. “Carry your own (beep) Jessebelle.”
She cuts her eyes at me. They’re razor sharp. If looks could kill, I would’ve been dead. “(beep)hole.”
I give her a triumphant smile. We reach the van and they load her stuff up. She climbs into the back seat, I sit in the front, both of us not saying a word.
We hate each other already. This is going to be even more interesting than I thought.
Tara’s POV
New Jersey people are awfully nice. Everyone is helpful and they carry my stuff for me at the airport and everything. I’d never been on a plane before, so a nice man who was sitting next to me showed me how to breathe in and out if I got nervous. He even put his hand on my chest to see if I was doing it right. How nice!
My roommate is going to be here soon. Bob is his name. I take out a hand mirror and look at myself. My makeup is perfect and my blonde hair is silky and shinier than ever. First impressions are very important to me, that’s why I’m dressed in my best jean mini shirt and half-top. I’m lookin sexy, if I do say so myself.
Having never lived anywhere but Florida, I’m not used to very big cities and loads of people like I’m already seein in New Jersey. I didn’t finish high school and I don’t plan on going to college, but I do want to stop strippin and get me a real job. Maybe get my GED.
I don’t realize that there’s someone standin behind me and when I look up I just know its my roommate. He looks funny, unlike any other guy around where I live. He’s wearin one of those baseball hats to the side and jeans that look like they’re about to fall off of his ass. A long chain hangs from his neck. Oh yeah, I know who he reminds me of. 50 Cents. Or one of those other rapper type fellas.
“Hi! I’m Tara. You must be Bob!” I say. “It’s awfully nice to meet you.” I shake his hand really hard, to show my enthusiasm.
He looks at me all funny, like if I have something hangin off my face. “Yeah yo, I’m Bob. Good to meet you too shorty.” I notice that his eyes are on my chest, somethin I’m quite used to already when I first meet men.
“Shorty?” I’m really not that short.
“Yeah, shorty.” He has really blue eyes, as blue as the sky. A girl could get lost in em if you know what I mean.
“Okay, whatever.” I laugh. I guess I am short compared to him. “Where are you from? I’m from Jacksonville, Florida.”
“I’m from the best of the Midwest, Chi-town baby. All day, every day.”
I have no clue what the hell he’s sayin. “Chi-town?” He also has a really strange accent.
“Chicago ma, Chicago.” He laughs a little.
“Oh.” I laugh too and wonder why he’s callin me “Ma”. We head on to our ride, a big black van. “I’m really excited.”
“Yeah, me too. This is gonna be really cool.” It sounds like his voice changed but then he clears it and goes back to that other strange voice. “Can’t wait to see the other honeys. If they’re as sexy as you, there’ll be no problem.” He winks at me. I can’t help but blush.
Frank’s POV
I’m alone. As usual. It’s not a surprise that I’m waiting by myself in front of the house for all the other roommates. I’m usually always by myself. Always.
I have no friends, but that’s by choice. Or it could be that I have social anxiety and freak out around people. I seriously have no idea what possessed me to go on this show. I never thought I’d actually get picked, I guess.
I blow my hair out of my eyes and scratch myself underneath my tight black t-shirt. I feel like getting naked, it’s so hot, but I don’t want to freak any of my roommates out with all the tattoos I have and/or my disgustingly bony body. I’m sitting on my suitcase in front of the house, almost biting my whole hand off from nerves. I force my lip ring into my skin so hard that it bleeds a little. I probably won’t even be able to speak to these people. I’m hoping they just ignore me and leave me on my merry way. Dammit, why did I send that fucking tape in?!
The only thing that I’m hoping for is that they’ll be so astounded by the house that they won’t even notice that I’m there. Fat chance. When I first got to the house I thought “What the fuck?”
I’ve lived in Jersey all my life and its safe to say this is probably the ugliest house I’ve ever seen. Even I live in a better house than this. I thought The Real World was about having an awesome house and we have to live in this? The budget for this season must be like $10 dollars or something.
Just another disappointment on an already long list of them. Life is so fucked up. I put my head in my hands and feel like crying. Instead I decide to listen to some music. I’ve already cried enough for today. My iPod goes in my ears, the only thing that comforts me. The sounds that escape from the headphones are soothing my soul to no end. I shut my eyes and just enjoy it for a few moments.
I hear a huge something pull up alongside of me. My roommates are here. I feel like throwing up…
Gerard’s POV
“Why are you all covered up Gerard? Damn, its like 90 freakin degrees outside.”
“I hate the sun. I’m a vampire.” I show her my ‘fangs’ and start tickling her. We both laugh.
The van screeches to a halt and me and Aris stop joking around. She’s an awesome girl. We’re practically best friends already.
The excitement that had been building up all day suddenly drops to the floor as we climb out of the van. Aris’s normally smiling face falls. The house is definitely not what we had expected.
The white paint is pealing off in places and there’s no porch, just a dirty brown bench in the front. The second floor has two windows and it looks shabbier from the outside then the first.
“This has to be a joke. I live in the projects and my apartment is nicer than this.” Aris says.
It can’t be a joke because the driver is already pulling away, our stuff on the floor by our feet.
“Maybe the inside is nicer?” I venture. “It is New Jersey. I wasn’t expecting the White House anyway.” But I definitely wasn’t expecting this.
“Yeah but…this?” I feel so bad at how disappointed Aris looks. I found out she comes from a very poor neighborhood, and she was hoping to finally live somewhere nice and safe, I can imagine.
We’re so caught up with the house that we don’t notice someone sitting to the far right from us. He’s looking at us like a deer in headlights. He looks terrified actually. He’s the emo-est kid I’ve ever seen in my life.
“Hey.” I wave at him and Aris finally notices him too. She waves also, motioning him to come over. He hesitates for a second but eventually stands up and grabs the suitcase he had been sitting on.
“I’m Aris. What’s your name?” she smiles at him warmly.
He mumbles something that sounds like “Fuck.” Fuck can’t be his name so I ask him again. “Sorry, I didn’t hear you. What’s your name?”
“Frank.” He’s not looking at either of us, but at his dirty sneakers. Okayyy.
“Good to meet you Frank.” I hold out my hand. He looks at it like if it was something that could bite. He’s scrawny. Definitely not my type.
“Did you see this (beep) house Frank? It’s practically falling over!” Aris says.
“I noticed that.” Frank says. He looks to be smiling a little, a good sign. I don’t want him killing himself or anything.
“Lets check the inside.”
“Hold on! Let’s wait for the rest of the roommates.” Aris says.
“Okay.” I say. I’m not as excited as I once was. I came on the show to meet people, to open myself up more, to have fun. This house definitely doesn’t look fun. It looks haunted.
Aris’s POV
I really don’t want to show how disappointed I am, but I can’t help it. The house looks awful. I wanted to get away from the ‘hood. It seemed like I just stepped into a worse neighborhood than my own.
Where’s the big, wonderful mansion? The colorful paint? The anything? Plus this new guy Frank is pretty weird. He’s actually pretty cute in a really emo way. Okay fine, he’s quite hot. But I’m afraid he might start crying at any moment.
Another van pulls up. Goody, more roommates…
Bob’s POV
Tara is nice. And hot. But I can’t think of any other girls. I left a girlfriend back in Chicago. She has no idea why I’m doing this. It’s not only because I wanted to get away from my horrible job, but away from everything in Chicago.
Everyone thinks I’m a fake because I act black. But I love the culture, the music, the style. Why do people hate me for it? I just try to ignore them whenever they call me a ‘wigga’. I can’t say it doesn’t hurt.
Tara seems to understand though. She looked at me strangely when we first met and she couldn’t understand what I was saying. She is kind of slow. It’s okay though, her great boobs make up for it.
We finally pull up to the house where I see three people standing in front of it.
“Yo, wake up Tara.” Her eyes open slowly. Time to put on my ‘gangsta’ hat.
Jessebelle’s POV
Great, more fucking asshat roommates to meet. I only auditioned for The Real World because I lost some stupid bet. I had to leave Detroit and my whole life behind.
This stupid, dorky guy doesn’t help anything either. What did he say his name was? Gay? Or Mr. Something-is-Nesting-In-My-Hair? I suppose he thinks it looks cute. It kind of does in a nerdy sort of way. Grrr. This heat is really getting to me. It never gets this hot in Detroit.
I already feel so much animosity towards him. I already feel animosity towards them and I haven’t even met them yet.
In front of the house there is standing a really short, scary skinny looking kid. I’ll have to make him eat something so he won’t die. Next to him is possibly the gayest guy I’ve ever seen. Some Spanish chick stands next to him. I won’t like her, I know it.
I burst out laughing when I see the tall blonde guy. He looks like a misplaced rapper. Some bimbo with huge boobs makes me laugh even harder. Ray looks at me as I laugh.
“What are you looking at?
“Oh my God, The sky is falling, Jessebelle is laughing.” He says, rolling his eyes.
Stupid fucker.
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Confessional: Meeting Your Roommates
Gerard: Aris is awesome. I can’t wait to hang out more with her. Everyone else is cool too. Frank seems to be scared of everyone, so I’m hoping he’ll open up. Jessesbelle is sort of scary. *laughs*
Tara: Wow, I’ve never met a real gay man before! This is exciting! *claps*
Aris: I love my roommates! Jessebelle could be a little nicer though. Well, a lot nicer.
Frank: I know people think I’m strange. They were looking at me like if I was from outer space. Except Aris. She’s pretty. *blushes*
Ray: Tara has huge boobs. Aris is really pretty. Bob seems like a cool dude, he just needs to speak a little more coherently. I won’t say anything about Jessebelle. *frowns*
Bob: Son, those people are all crazy! They’re probably all on (beep) medication. Aight, aight, some of them are cooler than others. Peace out! *random gang signs once again*
Jessebelle: I hate all of them. They could all go to hell. *stomps out of confessional*
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