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Changing Lives Seminar

Gospel-Centered Counseling:

How to Care Like Christ

© 2016

Robert W. Kellemen, Th.M., Ph.D.

RPM Ministries

Christ-Centered, Church-Based, Comprehensive,

Compassionate, and Culturally-Informed Biblical Counseling

Session One: The Story

“Open the Eyes of Our Hearts, Lord”: Ephesians 1:15-23

Introduction: Changing Lives with Christ’s Changeless Gospel Truth

What do we do after the hug? What do we say after the prayer?

Helping hurting people can feel like a maze!

We need a GPS!: Gospel Positioning Story—Romans 15:14; Philippians 1:9-11; 1 Timothy 4:16

AshleyNate’s Story: Hurt, Hardness, Help, & Hope

After listening to Ashley and Nate’s story, ponder:

  1. How would you begin to respond to Nate’s questions, “Can you help? Does the Bibleofferany hope for my wife?” How would you begin to see their situation/soul throughChrist’s eyes?

2.How would you respond to Ashley’s soul struggles? How would you begin to enter her situation and her soul with Christ’s grace and truth?

I. 3Portraits of Gospel-Centered Counseling: God’s Story Invading Our Story

A. Portrait # 1: Past/Faith/Cross

In gospel-centered counseling, the Bible’s grand redemptive narrative is the controlling lens through which we understand and interpret our counselee’s life story—We remember the ______with ______and see life with ______-eyes.

B.Portrait # 2:Future/Hope/Eternal

In gospel-centered counseling, together with our counselees we derive our understanding of earthly life from heaven’s perspective—We remember the ______with ______and see life with ______-eyes.

C.Portrait # 3:Present/Love/Grace

In gospel-centered counseling, the whole Bible story impacts the whole person’s whole story—We remember our ______calling to ______and see life with ______-eyes.

II. 8 Words Capturing the Gospel Story: Genesis 3:15 with Revelation 19:7, 17

In 8 words or less, summarize the Bible’s story/the message of the Bible:

______

A.The Bible’s Big Picture: Cover to Cover—Genesis to Revelation

“Christ ______the ______and ______His ______!”

______the ______; ______the ______!

B.The Bible’s 2 Suppers: Revelation 19:6-9, 17

  1. Rev. 19:7-9: The Wedding Supper of the Lamb (Wedding—______/______)
  1. Rev. 19:6, 17: The Great Supper of Our God (War—______)

III.3 Foundational Questions forGospel-Centered Counselors

A.Premise # 1: Life Is 1 Story with 2 Story Interpreters Asking 1 Question—Genesis 3:1-7

The Trust Question: “Do I______that God has a ______?”

B.Premise # 2: As Counselors We AllFollow Some “Script” that GuidesOur Counsel—

2 Corinthians 10:4-5

The Word/World Question: “Whose ______am I proclaiming?”

The Surface/Soul Question: “Am I giving good ______(solutions) or am I sharing the good ______(soul-u-tions)?”

IV. 8 Ultimate Life Questions from the Bible’s Drama of Redemption

  1. (Bookend 1) The Word: Ultimate Life Question # 1
  1. The World’s Question: “What is truth?”
  1. The Word’s Question: “Where do we find ______for life in a ______world?”
  1. (Prologue) Community/Trinity: Ultimate Life Question # 2
  1. The World’s Question: “Why is there something rather than nothing?”
  1. The Word’s Question: “Who is God?” “What comes into our mind when we think about God?” “Whose view of God will we believe—______or ______?”
  1. (Chapter 1) Creation: Ultimate Life Question # 3
  1. The World’s Question: “Who am I?”
  1. The Word’s Question: “______are we?” “In what story do we find ourselves?”
  1. (Chapter 2) Fall: Ultimate Life Question # 4
  1. The World’s Question: “Why do we do the things we do?”
  1. The Word’s Question: “What went wrong?” “What’s the ______of our problem?”
  1. (Chapter 3) Redemption: Ultimate Life Question # 5
  1. The World’s Question: “How do people change?”
  1. The Word’s Question: “How does ______change people?” “How does Christ bring us peace with God?”
  1. (Chapter 4) Church: Ultimate Life Question # 6
  1. The World’s Question: “Where can we find help?”
  1. The Word’s Question: “Where can we find a place to ______, ______, and ______—like Christ?”
  1. (Epilogue) Consummation: Ultimate Life Question # 7
  1. The World’s Question: “Where are we headed?”
  1. The Word’s Question: “How does our ______destiny impact our lives ______(as saints who struggle against suffering and sin)?”
  1. (Bookend 2) Progressive Sanctification: Ultimate Life Question # 8
  1. The World: “Why are we here?” (To Be a Better Me)
  1. The Word: “What’s our calling/purpose?” “How do we become like ______?” “How can my inner life increasingly reflect the inner life of Christ?”

Taking It Home with Us:

Applying The Story to Our Life and Ministry

  1. What difference can it make in your life/ministry to see the Bible as win the war/wed the bride?
  1. How could you begin to apply these tweet-size summaries to your life? To your ministry to others? If you were counseling Ashley and Nate?
  1. To view the Bible accurately and to use the Bible competently, we must anchor our counsel in the Bible’s Grand Story: The relational drama of redemption.
  1. Competent counselors are captivated by the Gospel story.
  1. To offer wise and loving biblical counsel, we must ask and answer gospel-centered biblical questions.
  1. Which of the Bible’s 8 ultimate life questions are you most excited about exploring and applying to your life and your ministry? Why? How?

Session Two: The Grace & Truth Story—Colossians 1:6

“Gazing on the Beauty of the Lord” (Psalm 27:4): Life Questions # 1-2

Introduction: The Written Wordthe Living Word

Helping hurting people still can feel like a maze!

Mike’s Story: Casting All Your Care on Him, Because He Cares for You

After listening to Mike’s story, ponder:

  1. Is the gospel sufficient for helping Mike with his anxiety, fear, and panic? If so, what would it look like to apply the gospel story to Mike’s life story—in a rich, robust, relational way?
  1. Is Christ sufficient for helping Mike with his anxiety, fear, and panic? If so, what difference could Mike’s relationship to Christ make? How?

I.Be ______in the Wisdom of the Word: You Can Handle the Truthfor Life!—Colosians1:27-29; 2:2-3; (and all of Colossians); John 2-4

A.God’s Written Word Is Sufficient: Relevant, Relational, Rich, Robust, Real, Raw

B.God’s Living Word Is Supreme: Jesus Knows People!

II.______of the “Wisdom” of the World: People Separated from the Life of God Can’t Tell Us How to Live Life for God—Colossians 2:4, 8

III.Be ______!: Don’t Spoil the Egyptians, Impact the Babylonians—Col. 4:3-6

IV.______!: Be Bowed Down and Bowled Over!—Colossians 1:18

Premise # 1: “What comes into our minds when we think about God is the most important thing about us” (A.W. Tozer).

Premise # 2: When we are confused about how to respond to the broken person sitting in front of us, our first thought should be about our Triune God of holy love—grace!

Jesus: “Inviting Troubled Hearts into the Joyful Trinity”—John 14-17

I.2 Biblical Portraits of Our Triune God of Holy Love—Grace

A.Our Trinitarian God: John 1:1 and Perichoresis

B.Our Holy-Loving God:

1.Isaiah 40:10-11

2.The Cross: Romans 3:25-26

II.4 Biblical Counseling Implications of Our Triune God of Holy-Love

A.Relate ______-to-______Because God Is Trinitarian: John 1:18

B.Make Biblical Counseling All About ______: John 17

C.Know the Soul Physician______to Be a Soul Physician: John 17:20-26

D.Our Most Practical Counseling Ministry Will Involve Helping People to Explore Their Functional ______of ______

Taking It Home with Us:

Applying The Grace & Truth Story to Our Life and Ministry

How could you begin to apply these tweet-size summaries to your life? To your ministry to others? If you were counseling Ashley and Nate? If you were counseling Mike?

1.We discover wisdom for how to live life in our broken world from the wisest Person who ever

lived—Christ!

2.The purpose of the written Word is to produce aweat the living Word

3.The battle for our minds and hearts is won or lost according to our image of God.

Session Three: The War and Wedding Story

“Paradise Created, Rejected, and Reclaimed”: Life Questions # 3-5

Introduction: The Bible Is ______, Not ______

Helping hurting people still can feel like a maze!

Ray’s Story: Hardwired for Worship

After listening to Ray’s story, ponder:

  1. What “heart” issues would you want to probe with Ray in order to diagnose, not just symptoms, but root causes?

2.Ray, like all of us, typically comes to us asking-without-asking, “Can you change my circumstances and fix my feelings?” With Ray, what would you focus on instead of or in addition to changed circumstances and fixed feelings?

I.Pursuing God’s Target: God’s Wonderful Design for the Soul

A.Premise # 1: God Designed Us to ______Him—The Imago Dei: “Very Good!”

Living on Purpose: Glorifying God by our inner life increasingly reflecting the inner life of Christ

B.Premise # 2: God Calls Us Not to Solution Focused Therapy but to ______

Focused Biblical Counseling

Counseling on Purpose: The whole gospel story impacting the whole person’s whole story. Of all people, biblical counselors should be the most comprehensive in our understanding of people.

II.Taking a Biblical X-Ray of the Heart in the World: The Imago Dei

An Image Dei Maturity Inventory

The Heart in the World: Reflecting Christ’s Relationship to God/People

  1. Journey with Everlasting Beings: Designed for God as Our Ultimate Environment (Coram Deo)—Luke 4:1-2a; Acts 17:28; 1 Corinthians 10:31

Like Christ, do I judge my circumstances through the grid of my Father’s love rather than judging my Father’s love by my circumstances?

2.Journey withEmbedded Beings (Life-Situation): Designed to Be Connected to and Impacted by One Another: Matthew. 26:40; 1 Corinthians12:24-27

Like Christ, do I candidly experience life in this broken world?

3.Journey withEmbodied Beings: Designed to Be Body/Soul—Genesis 2:7; Matthew26:41;2 Corinthians 4:7

Like Christ, do I depend second-by-second on the Spirit because I know I have the treasure of the image of God in a “jar of clay” (2 Corinthians 4:7)?

4.Journey withEmotional Beings: Designed to Feel Deeply—Psalm 139:13-14; Mathew27:46

Like Christ, do I face my feelings face-to-face with the Father?

5.Journey withVolitional Beings: Designed to Choose Courageously—Joshua 24:15; Mathew 26:39

Like Christ, do I surrender and entrust my will to the Father’s will?

6.Journey withRational Beings: Designed to Think Wisely—Matthew 6:9; Romans 12:1-2; Philippians 2:5-11

Like Christ, do I interpret life through the grid of the Father’s awesome glory? Do I make decisions based upon what will “hallow” the Father’s name?

7.Journey withRelationalBeings: Designed to Love Sacrificially—Matthew 22:35-40; John 3:16

a.Journey withSelf-Aware Beings: Designed for Relationship with Our Self—Identity in Christ (Psalm 42:5; Luke 2:49; Romans 12:3)

Like Christ, do I find my identity in my relationship to the Father?

b.Journey withSocial Beings: Designed for Relationships with One Another—Mutual SacrificialMinistry forChrist/to One Another(Genesis2:18; Matthew 22:39-40; John 10:11)

Like Christ, do I make sacrificial ministry the goal of my relationships to others?

c.Journey withSpiritual Beings: Designed for Relationship with God—Trusting Worship of Christ (Matthew22:35-38; Luke 23:46)

Like Christ, do I entrust my soul to my Father’s good heart?

I. Not the Way It’s Supposed to Be

The Grand Canyon:“This ain’t the way it’s supposed to be!”

II.Taking an MRI of Our Sin-Sick Heart: Sinful Chambers of the Fallen Heart

A.Diagnosing Fallen Heart Chamber # 1: Spiritual/Relational ______— False Lovers of the Soul: Jeremiah 2:2; 13; 20-25, 31-33

Sin is not simply a thief caught in a crime; sin is an adulterer caught in the act!

B.Diagnosing Fallen Heart Chamber # 2: Heart______—Foolish Idols of the Heart: Jeremiah 2:5, 19, 29, 31

I.Gospel Amnesia and New Covenant Counseling: 2 Peter 1:3-4, 12-15

Refresh Our Memories: 2 Peter 1:3-4, 12-15

II.4 Life-Changing Results of Our Union with Christ: Applying Our Complete Salvation to Our Suffering, Sin, and Sanctification

What difference does the gospel make as we face suffering and fight sin?

A.Applying Our Justification: Our New Pardon—The Judge Declares Us “Not Guilty!” Forgiven!”

B.Applying Our Reconciliation: Our New Peace—The Father Says to Us, “Welcome Home!”

C.Applying Our Regeneration: Our New Person—The Creator Says to Us, “You Are a New Creation in Christ! Saints!”

D.Applying Our Redemption: Our New Power—The Victor Says to Us, “You Are More Than Conquerors through Christ! Victors!”

Summary of Our Complete Salvation, Sin, and Sanctification

Justification: “To your sin and condemnation, the gospel says, ‘Not guilty! Forgiven!’”

Reconciliation: “To your lostness and aloneness, the gospel says, ‘You are accepted. Adopted. You are family—sons and daughters. Welcome home!’”

Regeneration: “To your fallenness and heart of stone, the gospel says, ‘You are a new creation in Christ. Saints!’”

Redemption: “To your enslavement to sin and defeat at the hands of the world, the flesh, and the devil, the gospel says, ‘You are more than conquerors through Christ. Victors!’”

Taking It Home with Us:

Applying The War & Wedding Story to Our Life and Ministry

How could you begin to apply these tweet-size summaries to your life? To your ministry to others? If you were counseling Ashley and Nate? If you were counselingMike? If you were counseling Ray?

  1. We understand who we are by understanding Whose we are and Who we are to reflect.
  1. The essence of sin is spiritual adultery and heart idolatry: loving and valuing anyone or anything more than God.
  1. The root source of our problem: we’ve lost our first love for God because we’ve lost our first awe of God.
  1. We must build our lives and our counseling models of change on Christ’s gospel applied to Christians: justified, reconciled, regenerated, and redeemed people.

Session Four: The Rest of the Story

“Living the Gospel Together”: Life Questions # 6-8

Introduction: From Here to Eternity

Helping hurting people still can feel like a maze!

The All-American Family Story: Being the Church

After listening to the All-American Family story, ponder:

  1. How should the “typical/average” church respond? What does the “typical/average” church have to offer this family in crisis?

I.2 Competitors for the Church: Then and Now

A.Competition Then—In Paul’s Day in Colossians

B.Competition Now—In Our Day

II.2Callings for the Church Today: “Don’t Take a Back Seat to Anyone!”—Ephesians 3:17-19; 4:11-16

A.Grasp the Gospel ______with All the ______!: Ephesians 3:17-19

B.Grow in the Gospel ______by Being a Church ______Biblical Counseling, Not Simply a Church ______Biblical Counseling: Ephesians 4:11-16

I.1 Picture from John of the End of the Story: Revelation 7:15-17

II.1 Picture from Bob of the End of the Story: Michael Jordan and the Chicago Bulls

We’ve Read the End of the Story: ______!

I.2 Biblical Answers to the Question, “How Does Christ Change People?”

A.Gospel Indicatives: Ephesians 1-3

Christ has already changed us by JRRR!

B.Gospel Imperatives: Ephesians 4-6

Christ’s calls us to put off the old way and put on the new way empowered by God’s grace, Spirit, people, and future hope.

II.12 Progressive Sanctification Questions: A Growth in Grace Inventory

  1. By grace, am I growing more and more captivated by the gospel story demonstrated by increasingly anchoring my life and counsel in the Bible’s relational drama of redemption?
  2. By grace, am I increasingly discovering wisdom for how to live life in a broken world from the wisest person who ever lived—Christ?
  3. By grace, is the written Word increasingly producing awe in me at the Living Word?
  4. By grace, is the battle for my mind and heart being won more and more by my growing grasping of God’s holy love—grace?
  5. By grace, am I progressively understanding who I am by understanding Whose I am and Who I am to reflect?
  6. By grace, am I becoming increasingly convicted that the essence of my sin is spiritual adultery and heart idolatry—loving and valuing anyone or anything more than God?
  7. By grace, am I growing increasingly convicted that the root source of my struggle with sin is that I’ve lost my first love for God because I’ve lost my first awe of God?
  8. By grace, am I progressively building my life and my counseling on Christ’s gospel applied to my new heart as a justified, reconciled, regenerated, and redeemed son/daughter of God?
  9. By grace, am I increasingly growing in Christlikeness in a community journey by grasping grace together with all the saints?
  10. By grace, am I progressively gaining courageous hope in the midst of my earthly story by rejoicing in the end of my eternal story with Christ?
  11. By grace, am I progressively growing in sanctification by applying my complete salvation (my justification, reconciliation, regeneration, and redemption) to my life through God’s grace, God’s Spirit, God’s people, and God’s future hope?
  12. By grace, as I believe the gospel story, am I progressively becoming like the gospel story—full of grace and truth, full of love and holiness?

Taking It Home with Us:

Applying The Rest of the Story to Our Life and Ministry

How could you begin to apply these tweet-size summaries to your life? To your ministry to others? If you were counseling Ashley, Nate, Tim, Ray, or the All-American Family?

  1. Our growth in Christlikeness is a community journey.
  1. Rejoicing in the end of our eternal story with Christ gives us courageous hope in the midst of our earthly story.
  1. Sanctification is the art of applying our complete salvation (JRRR) by God’s grace, God’s Spirit, God’s people, and God’s future hope.

4 Biblical Compass Points for Gospel Conversations:

How to Care Like Christ

Introduction: Christlike Care

The Soul Physician and the Spiritual Friend

Helping Hurting People Still Can Feel Like a Maze

We Need a GPS!: Gospel Positioning Story

  • 1 Thessalonians 2:8: Sharing Scripture (Gospel) and Soul
  • Ephesians 4:15: Living Gospel Truth in Love

Gospel Conversations Portrait # 1: We first understand the gospel story, then we seek to understand our friend’s story, then we journey together to intersect God’s eternal story and our friend’s earthly story.