Talking Points for the Bully Power Point
Page 1
- 1 incident of bullying every 7 minutes
- Adults intervention in only 4% of the incidents
- Peers intervention in 11% of the incidents
Children learn more powerfully from what they see adults do than what they hear us say.
No intervention by adults = Bully thinks it must be ok
No intervention =Target may feel they deserve it
Adults can and must intervene
FIRST STEP---identify unacceptable behavior and all adults on campus know and agree that the behaviors are unacceptable
- Physical Aggression/ kicking hitting pushing choking
- Verbal Aggression/ starting rumors threatening hate speech
- Exclusion/ systematical exclude others i.e.: NO ONE PLAY WITH MARY
This does not mean the expectation is that every student will be friends with every other student
PAGE 2
Bullying is
Done by someone with more power or social support toward someone with less power or social support
It often includes the abuser blaming the target for the abuse
Often leads the target to blame self for the abuse
In most bullying situations the target can not stop the bullying by their own actions
Bullies can be happy and self confident/ many are popular
Page 3
How has our school reacted to abuse?
Do we deny? Do we ask the target to solve the problem without help?
Handout 1 & 2
Reminder: Adult intervention occurs in only 4% of bullying situations
Reminder: We all have made these mistakes in dealing with Bullying
Page 4 & 5
Handout on video game…. Have staff read and make a few comments
AGGRESSION IS A CHOICE PEOPLE MAKE
When we see bullying as a choice made by bullies and realizes that bullies are quite comfortable with their behavior then we can begin to look at the effects of bullying and can really develop techniques for making our schools safer.
Page 7, 8, 9
Consciously Choosing Language
Examples;
He/She is being bullied because He/She is being bullied about (takes blame away from victim
I feel I notice
Stop tattling Thank you for telling me
Nice Job I noticed that you
What happened What did you do
Just ignore it or work it out What have you already tried
Why did you do that We do not allow that here.
You are a bully or You are bullying We do not allow that behavior here.
Forced apologies from aggressive students are ineffective
- Unlikely to be genuine
- Make aggressive youth feel better without changing their behavior
- Pressure targets to forgive before they are ready to do so
- When we force a student to apologize we teach them to lie
HANDOUT 3 Rubric
Page 14
Bullies benefit when peer bystanders consciously withdraw
Every time bystanders act effectively to stop bullying they see their own potential to make a positive impact on the world
Teach bystanders that they are like the Neighborhood Watch program
You teach them to pay attention to what is happening around them and report the truth
Teach them to challenge the CODE OF SILENCE by creating a Supportive environment