Ministry LIFT Conference 2014

Small Groups in the Context of Discipleship

“A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another; just as I have loved you, you also are to love one another. By this will all people know that you are my disciples, if you have love for one another.”

- Jesus (john 13:34-35)

Questions to Consider:

Have small groups overpromised and under-delivered?

Are small groups the only way people can relate to one another and grow spiritually?

The Challenges of Small Group Ministry:

  1. ______
  1. ______
  1. ______
  1. ______
  1. ______

6. ______

“Christians expect to find community by attending churches and coming to small group. However, it is possible to hold a weekly small group meeting without adding the elements that make for real community. Because of our idols and the habits of our hearts church events simply become places that ‘individuals focus on themselves in the presence of others.’” - Tim Keller, Gospel in Life

“If community involves such things as knowing and being known, serving and being served, loving and being loved, then most relationships, Peck asserted, are constantly devolving into pseudo community. It’s the great temptation for small groups of people to slide into a state where they’re not ‘quite’ telling each other the truth and they’re not ‘quite’ celebrating each other. Instead, they tolerate each other, they accommodate each other, and they settle for sitting on the unspoken matters that separate them.”

“I have often heard ministers say to their congregations, "We're glad you're here. But if you really want to know what it's like to be part of our congregation, participate in a small group." The implication is that small groups are the best-if not the only-way to build authentic community. Almost every book I read on developing a successful church touts small groups as the key. But I have read that churches that provide small group opportunities can expect about a thirty percent involvement at best from the congregation. Even if thirty percent involvement is higher than it is in churches without small group programs, it is still not good. Why only thirty percent? Because small groups do not accomplish the promise of fulfilling all facets of a person's search for community. Small groups deliver only on one or two specific kinds of connection. A person's search for community is more complex than this.” - Joseph Myers, Search to Belong

The Complexity of Human Relationships - Four Relational Spaces (Joseph Myers)

______– these belongs are committed and participate in many ways, but may not fit into our box

______– neighbors, pool of possible friends

______– where we share private, but not naked experiences, feelings, and thoughts

______– where we share naked experiences, feelings and thoughts.

Myers Observations:

1. We need to ______the real community that can happen at all four levels.

2. In all four spaces, community needs to happen ______.

3. We need to switch from group programmers to becoming group ______.

The challenge of fostering Group Life in the church is to create opportunities for relational connections to be made. You will need to make choices as to where to begin facilitating relationship building given your cultural context, your church’s history, personality, and spiritual maturity.

The Goal of Spiritual Transformation

“Him we proclaim, warning everyone and teaching everyone with all wisdom, that we may present everyone mature in Christ. For this I toil, struggling with all his energy that he powerfully works within me.” - Colossians 1:28,29

We believe that the goal of discipleship is Christlikeness.

We are environmentalists shaping a climate where spiritual growth can take place organically as we become a spiritually transforming community.

We believe that discipleship is intensely relational and advocate group life, mentoring, and coaching as essential elements.

“The church needs to remember that the gospel intends not simply to make conversions, but to make Christlike people. And Christlike people are formed in the context of Christ-centered community. And Christ-centered community is created by Christ-centered leaders. Whether someone needs to relearn how to trust, how to express their darkest doubts and fears, or is simply lonely and without hope, the role of community is critical. The gospel is intended to permeate every aspect, every dimension and every fabric of a person’s life, worldview and core belief system. But again, it rarely does that without a community who helps people heal, change and find traction with what the gospel is and can do in their life. That’s why community is so critical to the holistic journey of someone’s spiritual life.” - Steve Saccone, Protégé

DISCIPLESHIP TASK ONE: HELPING PEOPLE MOVE CLOSER TO CHRIST: THE DISCPLESHIP PATHWAY

Becoming a fully devoted follower of Christ is an ongoing, lifelong journey. Spiritual development is a process of growth that unfolds as we move closer toward knowing and following Jesus Christ. The five steps in the discipleship pathway are:

______with Christ - “I am not really into religion or God & I am not sure I am interested.”

______Christ - “I believe in God, but am not sure about Christ. My faith is not a major part of my life.”

______in Christ - “I believe in Jesus and I am working on what it means to know him.”

______in Christ - “I am seeking to be closer to Christ and depend upon him regularly for guidance.”

______in Christ -“God is all I need in my life. He is enough. In most everything I do I seek to be a reflection of Christ.”

We want to help you take the ______in your relationship with Christ.

DISCIPLESHIP TASK TWO: HELPING PEOPLE BECOME MORE LIKE CHRIST – THE DISCIPLE’S PROFILE:

Loving God:Loving Others:

Believes what Jesus Believed (convictions)Loves like Jesus loved (community)

Models what Jesus Modeled (character)Serves like Jesus served (ministry)

Walks like Jesus Walked (spirituality)Leads like Jesus led (mission)

“Spiritual formation is the dynamic process whereby the Word of God is applied by the Spirit of God to the heart and mind of the child of God so that she or he becomes more like the Son of God. “ – Rowland Croucher

Spiritual Transformation In Relationships (Caliguire)

The Discipleship Question – What kinds of groups will enable people to belong and engage discipleship wherever they are on the spiritual journey? What kinds of relational connections do they need to take the next step in their spiritual growth?

Stage of Growth
Spiritual Continuum / Unfamiliar With Christ / Exploring Christ / Beginning In Christ / Growing in Christ / Centered in Christ
Relational Dynamic / Getting Together
Walk Across a Room / Exploring Together
Relate / Learning Together
Direction / Journeying Together
Direction/Discernment / Following Together
Discernment
Needs / Expressions of Love &
Sacrifice / Friendship
Information
Practical Love
Invitation
Hospitality / Biblical & God
Knowledge
Core Beliefs
Learn to Relate to God
& Others
Support & Modeling / Putting Off/Putting On
Safe Relational
Environment
Strong Spiritual
Environment
Appropriate Curriculum / Ongoing Awareness of
Spiritual Journey
Surrender
Contentment
Abandonment to God
Participation in Ministry
Effective Relational
Connections / Hospitality
Meet a Need / Services
Alpha Group
Hospitality
Task Group / Life Group
Bible Study
Alpha Group
1 X 1 Mentoring / Discipleship Group
Spiritual Formation
Class
Spiritual Friendship
Spiritual Direction
Counseling
12 Step
Focused Retreats / Spiritual Friendship
Spiritual Direction
Group Spiritual Direction
Ministry Team
Key Discipleship Principle (MOVE) / Openness to Christ / Accept Christ / Growth in Knowledge / Establish Spiritual Disciplines / Giving Your Life Away
Benchmarks of Spiritual Growth / Openness to contact / Express Interest in Christianity
Ask questions
Visit Group/Service
Help out a Ministry / God Awareness
Personal
Encouragement
Openness to God’s Wisdom
New Attitudes & Behaviors / Acceptance of Brokenness
Steady Faith
Growing Dependence on God
Freedom from Past
Ability to recognize God’s Activity
Increased Awareness of need for Grace
Yieldedness & Obedience to God
Growth in Humility / Willingness to admit mistakes and be honest
Openness to seek help
Growing commitment to engage the world through service
Self-awareness
Embracing suffering as growth opportunity
Engage in sacrificial service
Fulfillment in being used by God
Developmental Path – B. Hull / “ Go & Make” / “Come & See” / “Come Follow Me” / “Come Be With Me” / “Remain in Me”

Selected Reading:

Caliguire, Mindy, STIR: Spiritual Transformation in Relationships, Grand Rapids, MI, Zondervan, 2013.

Engelmann, Kim V. Soul-Shaping Small Groups: A Refreshing Approach for Exasperated Leaders, Downers Grove,

Il, IVP, 2010.

Gladen, Steve, Small Groups with Purpose: How to Create Healthy Communities, Grand Rapids, MI, Baker Books,

2011.

Gorman, Julie A., Community That is Christian: A Handbook on Small Groups, Grand Rapids, MI, Baker Books,

2002.

Hawkins, Greg L., and Parkinson, Cally, MOVE:What 1000 Churches Reveal About Spiritual Growth, Grand

Rapids, MI, Zondervan, 2011.

Hull, Bill, The Complete Book of Discipleship: On Being and Making Followers of Christ, Colorado Springs, CO,

NavPress, 2011.

House, Brad, Community: Taking Your Small Groups Off Life Support, Wheaton, Il, Crossway, 2011.

Miller, Tara, and Peppers, Jenn, Finding the Flow: A Guide for Leading Small Groups and Gatherings, Downers

Grove, Il, IVP, 2008.

Myers, Joseph R., The Search to Belong: Rethinking Intimacy, Community, and Small Groups, Grand Rapids, MI,

Zondervan, 2003.

Wilhoit, James C., Spiritual Formation as if the Church Mattered: Growing in Christ through Community, Grand Rapids, MI, Baker Books, 2008.

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