Resolving Conflict (Remember: RAs are available to help)

If leaving for the weekend, we prefer that we:

Inform each other of where we are going and when we’ll be back

Inform each other of when we’ll be back (only)

Other (please specify):______

If we are upset with each other, we prefer to...

Have a 1:1 conversation about the issue immediately

Give ourselves time to cool down before we confront the issue

Consult our RA for help confronting the issue

Other (ie. notes, email, voicemail):______

(*Please note: Face-to-face communication using “I statements” is recommended. Conversations with people outside of the conflict should promote the integrity of each person living in the shared space. Gossip/negative talk should be avoided.)

If we feel there are violations of this agreement, we would prefer to...

Settle the issue between ourselves

Try to settle the issue on our own, involving the RA only if necessary

Consult our RA to help settle the issue between us

Other (please specify):______

(*Please note: This agreement form can be reviewed and edited as needed. Repeated violations of this agreement may result in a meeting with Residential Education staff.)

Additional Comments(ie. pet peeves; non-negotiables):

We agree to be civil and respectful of each other’s individuality and to abide by what we have discussed in this agreement. We acknowledge that residents should be able to pursue their social and private lives in our community without being threatened by discrimination, disruption, or harassment of any form. By signing below, I agree to the guidelines listed in this document and agree to review these guidelines if necessary:

______

Roommate A Roommate B

______

Roommate C Resident Assistant

Residence Hall Roommate Agreement

Residence Hall NameRoom Number

______

Roommate A Roommate B

______

Roommate C

Why should you complete this agreement?

Sharing a space and living with another personnecessitates that you and your roommate form agreements regarding sleep hours, visitors, cleanliness, using each other’s belongings, etc. Putting your understanding in writing is often the best solution to avoid verbal agreements being forgotten or misinterpreted after the fact.

Helpful Tips!

  • Adapting to living with a new roommate takes time. You won’t need to be best friends, but you will need to learn how to coexist in the shared space.
  • Be respectful and open to different opinions, values, conflict resolution styles, and backgrounds.
  • Communication is key. Don’t expect your roommate to read your mind, and try not to let your concerns or frustrations build up.
  • Consult your Resident Assistant if you have questions or need a neutral party to help facilitate a conversation.

Instructions

  1. Spend time individually thinking about the following questions.
  2. Sit down with your roommate to complete the Agreement.
  3. Meet with your Resident Assistant to discuss the Agreement and sign the form together with your roommate.
  4. Keep and refer to this Agreement when needed.
  5. Don’t be afraid to have open, honest, respectful, and empathetic conversations with your roommate if discrepancies arise or revisions need to be made throughout the year.
  6. Have a great residential experience!

In the Room

Most days, weexpect to go to bed by ______and wake up by ______.

I ______take naps during the day: (Initial next to individual preference)

____, ____, ____Frequently

____, ____, ____Occasionally

____, ____, ____Seldom

I prefer to sleep when the...(Initial next to individual preference)

____, ____, ____Lights are off.

____, ____, ____Apartment is quiet.

____, ____, ____Doesn’t matter. Nothing bothers me when I’m sleeping.

____, ____, ____Other (please specify): ______

When studying, I prefer... (Initial next to individual preference)

___, ____, ____Total silence.

___, ____, ____Some noise is ok (ie. Phone conversations; music; television).

___, ____, ____Anything. Nothing bothers me when I’m studying.

Additional Comments:

Friends and Guests

We prefer that guests can stay overnight...

Only during the week.

Only on weekends.

Never

(*Please note: All guests (max: 2/resident) must be registered and accompanied by their host at all times. Guests may not stay for over 3 consecutive nights. See your RA and Housing Contract for more information.)

If I am away and my roommate has a guest, I...(Initial next to individual preference)

___, ___, ___Do not mind if my roommate’s guests sleep in my bed.

___, ___, ___Allow my roommate to sleep in my bed, but prefer guests do not.

___, ___, ___Prefer that my bed not be used.

Additional Comments(ie. Are there times that are off limits for socializing? Are there gender specifications for overnight guests? How much advance notice should be given when having guests?):

Cleanliness

In regard to our room’s appearance, we prefer that the room...

Always be kept neat and orderly.

Sometimes be kept neat and orderly.

Additional Comments:

In regard to cleaning, we prefer that...

We cooperatively will clean the entire room.

We will clean up after ourselves and clean our own space.

We will develop a cleaning schedule.

Additional Comments:

Sharing Items

Television / Share Ask First Don’t Share
Electronics (speakers, game consoles) / Share Ask First Don’t Share
Clothes / Share Ask First Don’t Share
Food / Share Ask First Don’t Share
Kitchen Supplies (dishes, utensils) / Share Ask First Don’t Share
Cleaning Supplies / Share Ask First Don’t Share
Toiletries / Share Ask First Don’t Share
Other: / Share Ask First Don’t Share
Other: / Share Ask First Don’t Share