Primary TAs: Anger Management

0001 10:00:00:01 10:00:02:14

(narrator) In any

boisterous playground,

0002 10:00:02:14 10:00:06:01

it's easy for tempers to flare up

and for anger to spill over.

0003 10:00:06:01 10:00:10:12

Managing children's anger

is a critical skill for all staff.

0004 10:00:11:12 10:00:13:15

Often it's down

to teaching assistants

0005 10:00:13:15 10:00:15:19

to sort this out

in the heat of the moment,

0006 10:00:15:19 10:00:18:02

whether in the playground

at break times

0007 10:00:18:02 10:00:21:14

or in the class so

the teacher can continue teaching.

0008 10:00:21:14 10:00:26:01

In this programme we'll follow

Jackie Roberts and Valerie Vassell,

0009 10:00:26:01 10:00:30:00

two teaching assistants

at KingswoodSchool in South London.

0010 10:00:30:00 10:00:32:03

They're going to explore

some techniques

0011 10:00:32:03 10:00:34:23

for helping children

manage their anger.

0012 10:00:34:23 10:00:38:23

All behaviour is difficult to deal

with because you go in blind.

0013 10:00:38:23 10:00:41:01

You could have a child

that's hungry.

0014 10:00:41:01 10:00:43:20

If you're hungry,

you're going to be angry

0015 10:00:43:20 10:00:45:16

because you can't think straight.

0016 10:00:45:16 10:00:48:20

Maybe they've been fussing

and fighting with their siblings

0017 10:00:48:20 10:00:50:22

or they went to bed late last night.

0018 10:00:50:22 10:00:55:06

Some children might just not feel

like being in school today

0019 10:00:55:06 10:00:59:16

and display behaviour

that is not appropriate for class.

0020 10:00:59:16 10:01:04:06

As a TA, my role is to really

remove the child from that class

0021 10:01:04:06 10:01:06:13

and to try and deal with it.

0022 10:01:08:22 10:01:10:17

(narrator) Valerie and Jackie

0023 10:01:10:17 10:01:13:11

have come to talk to

the learning mentor at the school.

0024 10:01:13:11 10:01:15:21

- You all right?

- Yeah, thanks.

0025 10:01:15:21 10:01:17:24

(narrator) Sarah Harris

is experienced

0026 10:01:17:24 10:01:20:10

in helping children

manage their anger,

0027 10:01:20:10 10:01:22:21

and they've come to see

if any of her techniques

0028 10:01:22:21 10:01:25:16

can be adapted

for their work as TAs.

0029 10:01:25:16 10:01:28:08

The carpet is the worst time.

0030 10:01:28:08 10:01:31:06

There's prodding on the carpet,

there's whispering,

0031 10:01:31:06 10:01:32:16

especially after play

0032 10:01:32:16 10:01:35:18

when they've brought in

issues from the playground.

0033 10:01:35:18 10:01:39:10

Someone's just suddenly erupted

for no apparent reason

0034 10:01:39:10 10:01:41:20

and then you've got someone crying.

0035 10:01:41:20 10:01:46:19

So you've got four things,

four little people depending on you

0036 10:01:46:19 10:01:50:12

to deal with all these issues

all at the same time.

0037 10:01:50:12 10:01:53:20

Which is more important?

And they want justice now.

0038 10:01:53:20 10:02:00:14

Sometimes they don't know

how to explain how they're feeling.

0039 10:02:00:14 10:02:05:18

Then I find it difficult to explain

to them because I don't know.

0040 10:02:05:18 10:02:08:14

Often the mistakes I've made

when dealing with anger

0041 10:02:08:14 10:02:11:13

is the language

I've been using with children.

0042 10:02:11:13 10:02:16:04

When you walk into a situation and

assume you know what the problem is

0043 10:02:16:04 10:02:18:09

before you've actually tried

to find out.

0044 10:02:18:09 10:02:21:19

I've told children off,

told the wrong child off,

0045 10:02:21:19 10:02:25:03

then I'm, "I'm really sorry."

0046 10:02:25:03 10:02:29:19

It's not about you having to know

what's going on with the child,

0047 10:02:29:19 10:02:33:14

it's about them identifying

their own feelings

0048 10:02:33:14 10:02:39:03

and going, "What choices

do I have to make to cool down?"

0049 10:02:39:03 10:02:43:00

And you support them,

you walk alongside them, I suppose,

0050 10:02:43:00 10:02:45:20

because... I don't think

we're mind-readers.

0051 10:02:45:20 10:02:50:11

(Sarah) Anger's healthy

because everybody gets angry.

0052 10:02:50:11 10:02:54:13

And it's no different for children.

Children get fed up with each other.

0053 10:02:54:13 10:02:59:13

I think if we ask children

to restrain from showing that anger

0054 10:02:59:13 10:03:03:11

they start to bottle it up and

that's when you get a big explosion.

0055 10:03:03:11 10:03:05:14

Anger management, what you're doing

0056 10:03:05:14 10:03:09:03

is you're allowing children

the space to be angry,

0057 10:03:09:03 10:03:11:19

but you're helping them

to channel that anger

0058 10:03:11:19 10:03:15:13

into something that's going to be

a lot more positive.

0059 10:03:15:13 10:03:17:15

(Valerie) "Are you a volcano?"

0060 10:03:17:15 10:03:19:17

This we could definitely

have done with

0061 10:03:19:17 10:03:21:22

- because he was...

- He was impossible.

0062 10:03:21:22 10:03:24:08

He was awful.

0063 10:03:24:08 10:03:30:07

- (Jackie) We're laughing, but...

- Biggest eruption ever.

0064 10:03:30:07 10:03:33:20

(narrator) They will look

at some techniques that Sarah uses

0065 10:03:33:20 10:03:37:03

to see how they can be adapted

for teaching assistants to use

0066 10:03:37:03 10:03:39:23

in their day-to-day work.

0067 10:03:39:23 10:03:42:00

They will look at three aspects -

0068 10:03:42:00 10:03:44:24

the physical symptoms of anger,

0069 10:03:44:24 10:03:48:05

some boundaries

for anger management,

0070 10:03:48:05 10:03:51:11

and different strategies

for expressing anger.

0071 10:03:51:11 10:03:53:09

(Sarah) We've got

some pictures here.

0072 10:03:53:09 10:03:56:24

On my first picture, what do you

think is going on in that picture?

0073 10:03:56:24 10:03:59:01

The boy's angry with his dad.

0074 10:03:59:01 10:04:01:10

(narrator) Valerie and Jackie

observe Sarah

0075 10:04:01:10 10:04:04:05

working on a one-to-one basis

with a pupil,

0076 10:04:04:05 10:04:06:14

exploring the physical symptoms

of anger.

0077 10:04:06:14 10:04:09:20

(Sarah) Can you describe

what they're doing and show me?

0078 10:04:09:20 10:04:12:08

They're going like...

0079 10:04:12:08 10:04:14:21

Their faces are really red

and they go...

0080 10:04:14:21 10:04:15:24

(Sarah) Mm.

0081 10:04:15:24 10:04:20:07

Siobhan is a child who used to have

severe anger-management problems.

0082 10:04:20:07 10:04:25:22

Her anger used to manifest itself

in the form of shouting,

0083 10:04:25:22 10:04:30:20

not listening to adults trying

to talk her through her anger,

0084 10:04:30:20 10:04:34:00

getting very wound up

in the playground, hitting children.

0085 10:04:34:00 10:04:37:16

Is there anything else about

her body that tells you she's angry?

0086 10:04:37:16 10:04:40:24

The girl won't let the other girl

play with her toys

0087 10:04:40:24 10:04:43:04

and she's shouting

at the other girl.

0088 10:04:43:04 10:04:47:08

Can you show me what she's doing

with her face? Can you show me?

0089 10:04:47:08 10:04:49:10

She's shouting, isn't she? Yeah.

0090 10:04:49:10 10:04:52:16

Is there anything in these pictures

that seems familiar to you,

0091 10:04:52:16 10:04:55:06

that you might do that's the same

when you're angry?

0092 10:04:55:06 10:05:00:13

Shouting and my face gets red

and I'm frowning.

0093 10:05:00:13 10:05:02:13

And I clench my fists.

0094 10:05:02:13 10:05:04:07

What the children have to do

0095 10:05:04:07 10:05:08:17

is identify what parts of their body

are affected when they feel angry.

0096 10:05:08:17 10:05:11:13

Some children might get

really hot in their face

0097 10:05:11:13 10:05:14:02

or some children

really clench their fists.

0098 10:05:14:02 10:05:17:08

Children who have difficulty

controlling their anger

0099 10:05:17:08 10:05:21:16

quite often don't make the link

between, "I'm angry",

0100 10:05:21:16 10:05:23:21

and, "My body feels different."

0101 10:05:23:21 10:05:27:05

We're going to write this

on our piece of paper.

0102 10:05:27:05 10:05:29:13

But we get to add

a bit of colour to it.

0103 10:05:29:13 10:05:32:08

For a hot face

what colour might we think of?

0104 10:05:32:08 10:05:33:23

- Red.

- Red, yes.

0105 10:05:33:23 10:05:36:24

It's nice for them to have

this picture in front of them -

0106 10:05:36:24 10:05:39:16

and they can add colour to it

and they can label it -

0107 10:05:39:16 10:05:42:15

of what happens to them

when they feel really angry.

0108 10:05:42:15 10:05:46:23

When we know how our body feels

when we're feeling angry,

0109 10:05:46:23 10:05:49:00

then we can start to deal with it.

0110 10:05:49:00 10:05:51:02

(narrator) Having watched

the session,

0111 10:05:51:02 10:05:53:18

Valerie and Jackie

are going to try these techniques

0112 10:05:53:18 10:05:57:07

with a small group of children

from their different classes.

0113 10:05:57:07 10:06:01:10

Both of them regularly run

small circle-time groups.

0114 10:06:01:10 10:06:03:12

They've devised

some icebreaker games

0115 10:06:03:12 10:06:06:09

to start the children thinking

about anger in general

0116 10:06:06:09 10:06:11:10

before exploring their own anger

and its physical manifestations.

0117 10:06:11:10 10:06:16:08

So who can tell me first

what they think anger means? Neesa?

0118 10:06:16:08 10:06:18:15

When you're not happy

with something.

0119 10:06:18:15 10:06:20:17

(Valerie) When you're not happy.

0120 10:06:20:17 10:06:22:00

Nishka.

0121 10:06:22:00 10:06:27:01

Anger means when you're,

like, physically sad

0122 10:06:27:01 10:06:29:11

and not feeling well.

0123 10:06:31:06 10:06:38:04

Anger means when you're getting

ready to punch someone in the face.

0124 10:06:38:04 10:06:39:24

That's what anger means.

0125 10:06:39:24 10:06:42:11

There's all different kinds

of anger,

0126 10:06:42:11 10:06:46:18

but the main anger is when you

really want to beat someone up.

0127 10:06:48:03 10:06:52:18

I think anger

is when you lose your cool

0128 10:06:52:18 10:06:56:21

and when your emotions have risen

to the top like a volcano.

0129 10:06:56:21 10:07:01:08

Siobhan, show me your facial

expressions when you're angry.

0130 10:07:01:08 10:07:04:11

(Sarah) It's important children

can recognise their anger

0131 10:07:04:11 10:07:08:04

because if they don't know

what's happening to their body,

0132 10:07:08:04 10:07:11:00

they don't know the link

between that and feeling angry,

0133 10:07:11:00 10:07:13:16

then you can't work with them

on strategies

0134 10:07:13:16 10:07:16:11

they can use

to calm themselves down.

0135 10:07:16:11 10:07:19:21

When I get angry I explode.

0136 10:07:19:21 10:07:22:04

When I get angry I squeeze my hands.

0137 10:07:22:04 10:07:25:03

When they recognise

"When I'm angry...",

0138 10:07:25:03 10:07:27:08

say, a child

who clenches their fists,

0139 10:07:27:08 10:07:31:02

if they know that's what they do,

you can teach them to just let go.

0140 10:07:31:02 10:07:35:22

On this we're going to label

the different parts of the body

0141 10:07:35:22 10:07:41:13

that will tell us about

the way we feel when we're angry.

0142 10:07:50:07 10:07:54:08

If you were really angry

or anybody in your class was angry,

0143 10:07:54:08 10:07:57:08

what do you think

some of the rules should be?

0144 10:07:57:08 10:08:02:01

That they don't fight back.

Be tolerant.

0145 10:08:02:01 10:08:07:09

OK, so we put "No fighting." Yes.

0146 10:08:07:09 10:08:09:21

Janai is a child

I've been working with a while.

0147 10:08:09:21 10:08:13:11

He's also a child who had

difficulty controlling his anger

0148 10:08:13:11 10:08:15:21

and his anger came in the form

0149 10:08:15:21 10:08:18:12

of he used to get very upset

when he felt an injustice,

0150 10:08:18:12 10:08:22:07

he felt like somebody

had told him off

0151 10:08:22:07 10:08:24:19

or he had been in trouble

and it hadn't been him.

0152 10:08:24:19 10:08:28:21

He would get angry by kicking

his chair or getting very upset

0153 10:08:28:21 10:08:31:03

and crying about what was going on.

0154 10:08:31:03 10:08:34:15

- What about your chair or table?

- Yeah, I banged my chair.

0155 10:08:34:15 10:08:37:05

When I was pushing my chair back,

I banged it in.

0156 10:08:37:05 10:08:38:22

So you banged your chair in.

0157 10:08:38:22 10:08:42:05

Is there a rule

that we might need to put in there?

0158 10:08:42:05 10:08:43:16

Care for equipment.

0159 10:08:43:16 10:08:46:19

So we could treat equipment

with care.

0160 10:08:46:19 10:08:49:10

Anger rules

build on the first lesson.

0161 10:08:49:10 10:08:54:05

Children now know what physically

happens to them when they are angry,

0162 10:08:54:05 10:08:56:10

and by introducing the rules

0163 10:08:56:10 10:08:59:11

they know that then there's

boundaries to their anger.

0164 10:08:59:11 10:09:02:24

It doesn't take away from them

that they can't feel angry

0165 10:09:02:24 10:09:05:19

because they know it's OK.

But then if they have rules

0166 10:09:05:19 10:09:08:18

then they need to find strategies

to deal with their anger,

0167 10:09:08:18 10:09:11:18

or solutions that keep to the rules.

0168 10:09:11:18 10:09:14:02

- Does talking about it help?

- Yeah.

0169 10:09:14:02 10:09:16:22

- It does help?

- It brings your stress down.

0170 10:09:16:22 10:09:19:13

It does. It brings

your stress down, doesn't it?

0171 10:09:19:13 10:09:21:23

(narrator) Valerie and Jackie

get their group

0172 10:09:21:23 10:09:26:03

to come up with

their own anger rules in pairs.

0173 10:09:26:03 10:09:29:02

Now we're going to feed back

to the group

0174 10:09:29:02 10:09:32:12

our ideas on anger. So, Janai?

0175 10:09:32:12 10:09:34:24

Don't hurt property.

0176 10:09:34:24 10:09:37:19

- Not to slap them.

- (Jackie) Try not to hit.

0177 10:09:39:14 10:09:42:17

Don't hit other people

and think about what you're doing.

0178 10:09:42:17 10:09:45:12

(Jackie) Think about your actions

before you do it.

0179 10:09:45:12 10:09:48:05

- I like that one.

- Do talk about it.

0180 10:09:48:05 10:09:51:21

Talk about your feelings, is that

what you want to say, Siobhan?

0181 10:09:51:21 10:09:57:01

Talk to someone

before you hurt them.

0182 10:09:57:01 10:10:00:04

(Sarah) It might be possible

for a teaching assistant

0183 10:10:00:04 10:10:02:00

to refer to the anger rules

0184 10:10:02:00 10:10:06:04

when they're working with a child

who has come into school

0185 10:10:06:04 10:10:10:08

and you can see that the anger is

building and an explosion is coming.

0186 10:10:10:08 10:10:13:23

The rules allow you to be proactive

rather than reactive.

0187 10:10:13:23 10:10:16:21

When they know the rules,

you can move on to the solution.

0188 10:10:16:21 10:10:20:02

Never take your actions on anyone.

0189 10:10:20:02 10:10:22:15

Marvellous. I love that one.

0190 10:10:22:15 10:10:25:11

Because we do that so many times,

don't we -

0191 10:10:25:11 10:10:28:22

take our anger and our frustrations

out on other people?

0192 10:10:32:19 10:10:35:24

If we were to come up

with some things that happen to us

0193 10:10:35:24 10:10:38:10

when we're angry,

that are not the nice things -

0194 10:10:38:10 10:10:40:17

the things we do

that are not so nice,

0195 10:10:40:17 10:10:42:16

what kind of things would you say?

0196 10:10:42:16 10:10:46:12

- Beating someone up.

- OK, beating someone up.

0197 10:10:46:12 10:10:49:10

The difference between

dirty and clean anger

0198 10:10:49:10 10:10:53:22

comes from either anger that breaks

the rules, which is dirty anger,

0199 10:10:53:22 10:10:56:11

and anger that keeps the rules -

clean anger.

0200 10:10:56:11 10:11:00:01

So examples of dirty anger,

they might kick the chairs,

0201 10:11:00:01 10:11:03:24

or they might punch another child,

or they might shout at an adult.

0202 10:11:03:24 10:11:07:09

And that breaks the rules

because they are hurting property

0203 10:11:07:09 10:11:09:08

and they're hurting other people.

0204 10:11:09:08 10:11:12:23

If we had to come up with some ways

that we could be angry

0205 10:11:12:23 10:11:15:00

but we were following

the anger rules,

0206 10:11:15:00 10:11:18:05

what kind of things could we do?

0207 10:11:18:05 10:11:22:06

- Don't fight back.

- What could we do instead of that?

0208 10:11:22:06 10:11:26:07

- Go to the teacher.

- OK.

0209 10:11:26:07 10:11:30:20

Clean anger might be going for a run

around the playground at lunchtime,

0210 10:11:30:20 10:11:35:15

or talking to their friend about it,

or ten deep breaths.

0211 10:11:35:15 10:11:39:05

So they're things that allow

the child to calm down

0212 10:11:39:05 10:11:42:01

and they also stick

to the anger rules as well.

0213 10:11:42:01 10:11:44:19

Sometimes it's hard

to talk about our feelings,

0214 10:11:44:19 10:11:49:10

but when we write it down,

sometimes we can make sense of it.

0215 10:11:49:10 10:11:52:10

Yeah. The last one

could be counting to ten.

0216 10:11:52:10 10:11:54:15

Counting to ten. Fantastic.

0217 10:11:54:15 10:11:57:14

(narrator) This session

lends itself well to role-play,

0218 10:11:57:14 10:12:00:19

to get children to think about

managing their own anger.

0219 10:12:00:19 10:12:04:22

- Hey, stupid.

- Hey, fat pig.

0220 10:12:04:22 10:12:06:24

Hey, fathead.

0221 10:12:06:24 10:12:10:01

Get out of my face.

0222 10:12:10:01 10:12:13:21

- Get out of my face.

- (Valerie) Thank you.

0223 10:12:13:21 10:12:19:18

Now I'm going to choose two children

to show us what they could've done.

0224 10:12:19:18 10:12:22:14

Right. Nathaniel and Janai.

0225 10:12:24:10 10:12:26:22

- What are you doing?

- Do I know you?

0226 10:12:26:22 10:12:29:20

Yes, you do know me.

Why were you fighting me last night?

0227 10:12:29:20 10:12:32:06

- (Nathaniel) I didn't.

- I want a fight.

0228 10:12:32:06 10:12:34:17

- Well, I don't want a fight.

- Well, I do.

0229 10:12:34:17 10:12:36:17

Well, I don't.

0230 10:12:37:24 10:12:40:07

Excellent. Well done.

0231 10:12:40:07 10:12:43:17

And what do you think

the best choice you made was?

0232 10:12:43:17 10:12:46:09

- I walked away.

- You walked away.

0233 10:12:46:09 10:12:48:21

That's absolutely excellent.

0234 10:12:48:21 10:12:51:11

(Sarah) It's important

to give children choices

0235 10:12:51:11 10:12:53:11

because you involve them

0236 10:12:53:11 10:12:56:15

in the management of their own

behaviour and their own anger.

0237 10:12:56:15 10:13:00:15

And that's really powerful, because

if you were to tell them what to do

0238 10:13:00:15 10:13:02:22

they're less likely to do it.

0239 10:13:02:22 10:13:06:02

How did it work when you put it

into the group situation?

0240 10:13:06:02 10:13:08:19

Did you find the strategies

were useful for you,

0241 10:13:08:19 10:13:11:00

moving from one-to-one into a group?

0242 10:13:11:00 10:13:14:05

I found it lot easier

than I actually thought

0243 10:13:14:05 10:13:19:08

because they fed off each other

when it came to different ideas.

0244 10:13:19:08 10:13:23:08

I thought also getting them

to role-play was very good for them,

0245 10:13:23:08 10:13:26:19

because sometimes when you

put them on the spot they freeze up.

0246 10:13:26:19 10:13:30:00

But they really got into

their roles, didn't they?

0247 10:13:30:00 10:13:33:17

Another thing I learned

was I'd always said to a child:

0248 10:13:33:17 10:13:37:24

"Why are you angry?

What do you have to be angry about?"

0249 10:13:37:24 10:13:39:22

I'm always saying that to them.

0250 10:13:39:22 10:13:43:17

But I learned today that,

yes, it is all right to be angry.

0251 10:13:43:17 10:13:48:00

It's not, "Why are you angry?" it's,

"How are we going to be angry?"

0252 10:13:48:00 10:13:50:15

I learned a lot

about those children.

0253 10:13:55:17 10:13:58:15

Visiontext Subtitles:

Katherine Appleby

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