Posted By: Danebramage on May 31, 04 8:37 Pm Profile
Archives: May 2004
Mon May 31, 2004
Memorial Day 2004
I want to formally thank everyone who ever laid their life on the line for this amazing country.
Thank You ALL !
db
Posted by: DaneBramage on May 31, 04 | 8:37 pm | Profile
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Sat May 29, 2004
The Sugar Story
It was a Sunday afternoon in 1997. My Pappaw, my mom's dad, was living with my parents and Dane and I were staying with him for a couple of hours that day until they got home from an out of town trip.
At some point while we were there, Pappaw says that we need to go to the store to get some sugar. It sounded a little strange, but we had to get some groceries for ourselves, so we all got into the car and went to the local supermarket.
All seemed normal until we were checking out and Pappaw makes a beeline to the customer service counter to get himself a carton of cigarettes. That may not sound too unusual except for the fact that he was not supposed to be smoking. My mom was always afraid that he would burn the house down (he had some dementia, Dane thought that was Bullshit). The thing was that he always managed to get his hands on a pack of smokes.
We got home from the store and, lo and behold, I looked in the cabinet and what do I find but three 5 pound bags of sugar, one of them open. I think that maybe I knew Pappaw was playing us, I don't know.
This is one of the funniest memories I have of him. He died a few months later.
By the way, he had been smoking since he was 7 years old and died at the age of 86, despite what some would consider a not so healthy lifestyle.
Posted by: UziQ on May 29, 04 | 12:29 pm | Profile
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Fri May 28, 2004
A nice post on Curmudgeonly pushing my song:
Check it out and support that blog!:
http://www.terpsboy.com/
Also, cj, feel free to call me while I am in Chicago... You have my cell nuber I believe...
Keep posting everyone!
Posted by: Yarbz on May 28, 04 | 7:33 am | Profile
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A nice post on Crumudgelnly pushing my song:
Posted by: Yarbz on May 28, 04 | 7:33 am | Profile
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Thu May 27, 2004
ITS SNOWING - SORT OF
Treasury Secretary John Snow should be ashamed of himself. Seems that he didn't read ANY of his personal financial statments last year. OOPS!!! I guess it should not come as a suprise. When he became CEO of CSX Corp, they were the largest railway company in the US. When he left to go to the White House, they were the third largest. Kinda working backwards huh? I guess it makes sense why O'Neil was fired and Snow was hired. Bush wanted someone else around that doesn't like to read stuff.
Eating yellow Snow...
Posted by: The Theorist on May 27, 04 | 8:02 pm | Profile
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Next Weekend Plans are Final
Testicle Festival*
June 5, Lake Ozark
Free! Being free is the best part, but there are lots and lots of Harleys, music, food, booze, other stuff, and fights....
Almost forgot, also there are lots and lots of cops, sheriffs, local PD, and highway patrol.
Bummer.
Posted by: cj on May 27, 04 | 3:48 pm | Profile
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Top Ten Answers To The Question, "How Tough Are The Marines?"
This could be Yarbz speaking:
10. "So tough, we jump from air transport planes without parachutes"
(Sergeant Enrique Larrea)
9. "So tough, none of us have slept or eaten in over two years"
(Sergeant Edwin Toribio)
8. "So tough, I hate not going to the dentist"
(Sergeant Herbert Johnson)
7. "So tough, I wear my 'Boston Sucks' hat at Fenway"
(Sergeant Adam Deluca)
6. "You know how the Army does more before 9am than most people do all day? We get all that done by 7"
(Staff Sergeant John Werner)
5. "So tough, we haven't taken a sick day since 1978"
(Staff Sergeant James Taylor)
4. "So tough, if our tank breaks down, we'll carry it to Jiffy Lube"
(Gunnery Sergeant Albert Fowler)
3. "We're really tough. Sorry, I'm not that creative"
(Gunnery Sergeant James Meek)
2. "So tough, we didn't even cry while watching 'Divine Secrets of the Ya-Ya Sisterhood'"
(Gunnery Sergeant Darin Harris)
1. "So tough, if you want we can take care of your little Lakers problem"
(Gunnery Sergeant Mark Butler)
Posted by: cj on May 27, 04 | 2:47 pm | Profile
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Too Loaded to Come to the Phone!!
I fear this is what is going on with Shrub today, a repeat of the Nixon years. I can still see him with his quote fingers up, "I am not a criminal." Yeah right.
Posted by: cj on May 27, 04 | 11:51 am | Profile
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A big mystery: Why do we laugh?
Laughter is part of the universal human vocabulary. All members of the human species understand it. Unlike English or French or Swahili, we don’t have to learn to speak it. We’re born with the capacity to laugh.
One of the remarkable things about laughter is that it occurs unconsciously. You don’t decide to do it. While we can consciously inhibit it, we don’t consciously produce laughter. That’s why it’s very hard to laugh on command or to fake laughter. (Don’t take my word for it: Ask a friend to laugh on the spot.)
Laughter provides powerful, uncensored insights into our unconscious. It simply bubbles up from within us in certain situations.
More...
Posted by: cj on May 27, 04 | 8:40 am | Profile
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Wed May 26, 2004
Posted the song: Don't Vote For John Kerry:
It's a 1 hour demo but a think it is fun... It is the first song on the page:
Johnny Fubar
Posted by: Yarbz on May 26, 04 | 9:33 pm | Profile
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MC DONALDS - NOW RENTING DVDs
I guess finding a way to make food the tastes good would be out of the question. Now you can get shitty food, and a movie. Guess they feel good knowing that people will not only be able to buy a McHeartattack, but now they know that said fat ass will be at home stittin on the couch gettin fatter.
5 Big Macs, 7 Quarter Pounders, 12 large fries ,6 extra large Cokes, 12 apple pies, and Lord of the Rings...to go please. Oh, and can ya throw in a tub of lard please.
Posted by: The Theorist on May 26, 04 | 8:27 pm | Profile
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BUSH GETS IT WRONG AGAIN
Lies, lies, and more lies. Will it ever end.
And he approved the lies...
Posted by: The Theorist on May 26, 04 | 7:07 pm | Profile
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AT LAST...THE TRUTH
Midge Decter, Neo-conservative Rant Queen, fianally decided to tell the truth. For those of you who don't know who she is, here is her latest book. Nice how the Heratige Foundation (assholes) is advertising it for her. Back to what she said:
"We're not in the Middle East to bring sweetness and light to the world. We're there to get something we and our friends in Europe depend on. Namely, OIL."
5/21/2004
Seems as though at least one of the neo-CONS finaaly let it slip. Now, we all know thats the reason we are there, and the people who still think it for National Security are still fooling themselves.
Posted by: The Theorist on May 26, 04 | 5:54 pm | Profile
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THE BUSH FAMILY SURE LOVES VACATION
Ah, The Freedom of Information Act. Seems you can still use to get a little info on our Presidents, past and present. Lets take a little look at just how much vacation time Bush took between Jan 2001 and August 2003. 250 offical vaction days in less than one term. 250. In that time he was in office for a total of 973 days and 695 working (week) days. Now I'm not so good at math, but thats about 40%. Lets take a look at our last 5 Presidents and see just how much vacation time they took.
Jimmy Carter (D) - 1 term, 79 vacation days
Ronald Reagan (R) 2 terms, 335 vacation days
George H.W. Bush (R) 1 term,543 days
Bill Clinton (D) 2 terms, 152 days
Shrub (LOST) less than 1 term, 250 days
So lets see here, Carter, Regean, and Clinton served a combined 5 terms and took a total of 586 days off.
The Bush guys served less that 2 years and have taken (as of 8/03) 793 days off.
No wonder these guys will go down as the worst 2 Presidents we have ever had. Maybe if they spent a liitle more time working, and a little less time fucking around and playing cowboy they would have been able to finish what they started. You would think the George Jr. learned a litlle something from his daddy. Well I guess he did. Seems the it was the wrong thing though.
Posted by: The Theorist on May 26, 04 | 5:18 pm | Profile
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January 1, 1958-August 23, 1984 "Our Loving Sister"
Someone said, "Prepare yourself cj. Someone wants to talk to you." The next thing I know I am in front of a white church and am not in my body. I am a whispy thing, same as the whispy thing standing next to me. I look at the whispy thing and then at my arms and see that I am back in my body again and the whispy thing beside me has turned into my best friend, Kim, who is 23 years old.
Kim and I hug and then I tell her how much I have missed her and asked if Jerry, her ex-hubby, did this to her. "No he would never do that, we argued about money and his running around every night, but he would never do this to me," she said. I am satisfied and we discuss things I cannot remember now.
A huge clap of thunder wakes me up, yet I didn't know I was dreaming. That could not have been a dream. Hard rain immediately starts pounding the tent and I wake up my husband to help put the rain fly on the tent. More...
Posted by: cj on May 26, 04 | 12:47 pm | Profile
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Does it Take Long?
I'm looking at an ad sheet and found this coupon for a free hot dog or polish sausage and 12 ounce fountain drink with $10 or more gasoline purchase. The ad also says "Call in Order Available". WTF? Everytime I see a convenience store selling hotdogs and polishes they are on a roaster thing going round and round. Why would you have to call in a hot dog order? Maybe they run out quickly since it doesn't take long to spend $10 on gas nowadays.
Posted by: cj on May 26, 04 | 12:37 pm | Profile
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Actual bumper stickers found on cars and trucks!
· Constipated People Don't Give A Shit.
· Practice Safe Sex, Go Screw Yourself.
· If You Drink, Don't Park; Accidents Cause People.
· Who Lit The Fuse On Your Tampon?
· If You Don't Believe In Oral Sex, Keep Your Mouth Shut.
· Please Tell Your Pants Its Not Polite To Point.
More...
Posted by: cj on May 26, 04 | 9:16 am | Profile
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Weapons Found
For you Yarbz
Posted by: DaneBramage on May 26, 04 | 8:25 am | Profile
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The Manatee Mambo
I just couldn't resist posting this.
Years ago, on a family vacation with my parents, we went to Manatee Springs, a state park in Florida. While taking a tour of the place, the ranger told us that despite the name, Manatees had never been seen in the clear water to his knowledge. Two minutes later, we asked what the giant mammals in the water were if they weren't Manatees. Sure enough, there was a mother and a calf eating hyacinths and swimming about. They are huge and hideously ugly creatures, but like some dogs that are so ugly they are cute, Manatees are just chock full of cuteness. More...
Posted by: FloridaBill on May 26, 04 | 7:03 am | Profile
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Finally, the truth:
The New York Times announces to the world that they suck big donkey dicks.
The FoxNews Story Here!
Posted by: Yarbz on May 26, 04 | 6:47 am | Profile
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Yarbz New Deck Colors:
After slaving away Friday, Saturday and Sunday, here are the results:
Posted by: Yarbz on May 26, 04 | 5:53 am | Profile
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I was up at 4 AM writing and recording this:
G------D------
Don’t vote for John Kerry
Am------G---
He’s really such a stupid ass
-----Am------G------Am------D---
And when he opens up his mouth he spews out flatulent gas
Don’t vote for John Kerry
He’s got no plan for you
Excepting that he’ll reach down in and grab your cash from you
Don’t vote for john Kerry
He doesn’t have a clue
He’ll say things that you want to hear but that he’ll never do
Am--D
John Kerry
Am------D---
Stay away from me
Am---D
John Kerry
Am------D------
And the Ketchup queen
Am------D-----
Better stay away
Am-----D------G----
Or I might have to kick your ass…
Don’t vote for John Kerry
He’s tall and looks like Lurch
He big and slow and lumbering and evil in the eyes of the church
Don’t vote for John Kerry
He’s friends with "drinkin’ Ted"
And if you dare go ride with him you might just end up dead
Don’t vote for John Kerry
He's thinks he's a war hero
He stabbed his commrades in the back three cheers for General Ho!
John Kerry
Stay away from me
John Kerry
And the Ketchup queen
Better stay away
Or I might have to kick your ass…