Captain Hook
Page 12
On board Hook’s ship
There is a backcloth of the side of a ship, and stairs up to a platform. On the platform is the ship’s wheel, with a
skull-and-crossbones flag flying above. Various mops, buckets, and an anchor lean against the side of the ship
Chorus Pirates start mopping the deck etc.
Captain Hook is standing by the wheel, taking all the applause from the audience
Hook What would the world be like without Captain Hook?
He spots Rum & Coke and starts walking down from the poop deck
Ahh, there you are, you pair of snivelling, scurvy-ridden scallywags, you know what I want! Peter Pan, have you found his hideout?
Rum Well …
Hook Of course you haven’t, you barnacle-bottomed buffoons. Who is the only one capable of finding Peter Pan’s hideout?
All Pirates HOOK!
Hook Who is going to capture Peter Pan and the Lost Boys?
All Pirates HOOK!
Hook Who is going to squash the Lost Boys like flies?
All Pirates HOOK!
Hook Who is going to gut Peter like a fish?
All Pirates HOOK!
Coke Put your hands together for …
Rum HOOK!
All other Pirates stay silent
Hook HANDS! How dare you! Oh I hate being disappointed, and I hate living in this flawed body, and I hateliving in Neverland, and I hate ... I hate … I hate Peter Pan!
Rum and Coke stand SL and mimic this whole speech as if they’ve heard it a hundred times. Hook sees them and
approaches them
Rum, Coke, be good fellows and fix the plank -
He pauses, and they start to go and do it
- so I can make you walk it!
Rum (pleading) No, no, sorry, Cap’n!
Coke (pleading) We have news!
Hook You have five seconds or -
He slides his hook across his throat with sound effect
Rum We saw Peter flying -
Coke He had a girl with him -
Rum He’s bringing her to Neverland!
Hook A girl? He’s found a mother. I need a mother. Gather round, I have a plan.
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Hook All those years of you being such a good friend to Peter, then Wendy comes along and you are just cast
aside like an old forgotten toy. He has no need for you anymore.
Tinkerbell (starting to cry) Oh don’t say that, Peter wouldn’t … (cries)
Hook Oh, come now, sweet Tinkerbell, don’t cry. You can join us.
Tinkerbell Never, I will never join you.
Hook Never is an awfully long time, especially if you’re on your own, which you are, aren’t you, Tinkerbell?
You’ve been replaced.
Tinkerbell Everything was fine until she came along, I hate her, I wish she would disappear.
Hook Let me help you. We’re your new friends, and want to help you. Let us take care of Wendy for you, with
her out of the picture, Peter will be all yours again.
Tinkerbell How are you going to do that, what do you need from me?
Hook Just tell us the location of Peter’s hideout and leave the rest to us.
Tinkerbell Oh I don’t know, you won’t hurt Peter, will you?
Hook I won’t lay a hand on him, I promise, pirates’ honour.
Tinkerbell (to audience) What do you think I should do? Should I trust Hook?
Audience No!
Hook Oh yes she should!
Audience Oh no she shouldn’t!
Tinkerbell Oh I don’t know, I’m so confused.
Hook Don’t worry, it’s not your fault if you’re not brave enough. After all you’re just a fairy, not a real girl like
Wendy.
He goes to walk away, he knows he’s got her
Tinkerbell I am brave.
Hook Oh you are? Brave enough to tell us?
Tinkerbell whispers to HookOh, okay, um.
As soon as he has the info he turns nasty and as he talks he’s backing her into the cage
You pathetic little creature, how easily manipulated you are, but then again, that’s the case for most women.
Look at you, did you honestly think we would help you? You did? Oh my heart bleeds. But you’ve helped me, and that’s what really matters.
She is in the cage, he slams the door shut
Men! Let’s go and get Peter!
Rum All lads, together!
Hook (shoving them off) Agh!
Tinkerbell You won’t get away with this!
Hook I already have.
Tinkerbell You promised you wouldn’t lay a hand on Peter.
Hook (showing his Hook) And I won’t.
Audience Boo!
They exit SL and help turn revolving set as they go
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Hook Peter Pan is…
Peter, Tinkerbell and Wendy enter through the audience
Peter Right over here!
Hook Peter Pan! It’s not possible.
Peter Anything’s possible, we’re in Neverland.
Hook (to Rum and Coke) I’ll deal with you two later.
Peter Tinkerbell, release the Lost Boys.
Tinkerbell runs onto the stage and goes to the Lost Boys. Wendy goes with her, Peter gets his sword out and he
and Hook start circling each other
Hook I’m actually glad you survived the poison, now I get to kill you with my own hand.
Peter What? That one or the one Tick Tock ate?
Peter steps back into the group of lost boys who attach the flying wire if using flying, otherwise fight stays on
the ground
Hook Look at you, the boy who never grew up, now you’re going to have to fight a real man.
Peter I’d rather be young and loved, than old and lonely like you.
Hook Prepare to die, Peter. (Gets his sword ready)
Peter To die would be a grand adventure. (Thigh slap)
Hook Death is the only adventure you have left.
Sword fight on the ground first, then Peter rises and they fight one up, one down, then Hook goes up to the top
of his ship and they fight both up
The Lost Boys and Pirates start fighting in pairs, the fight is choreographed like a dance with music
Chief and Tiger Lily enter SL
Tiger We are with you, Peter!
During the routine Tiger Lily and Mama Chief start rounding the Pirates up into the middle and tying them up.
By the end of the routine all the Pirates are tied up in the middle and the Lost Boys, Nana, Tiger Lily and Mama
Chief are victorious. Peter and Hook are still fighting. Peter gets Hook into a hold so it looks like Peter has won
Sound effect of clock ticking, Peter starts backing Hook onto the plank with his sword
Hook Not Tick Tock, that crocodile will not get another piece of me. Please, Peter, don’t feed me to Tick Tock!
I’ll do anything, I’ll be nice, help me Peter. You’ve won, I will leave you alone, I know I can’t defeat you.
Peter (starting to feel bad talks to the audience) What do you think I should do? Shall I help him?
Audience No!
Peter lowers his sword and holds out his hand to help Hook. Hook pulls Peter towards him to try and push
Peter into the water. Peter realises this, lifts his sword again and pushes Hook into the wings SR. At the same
time giant crocodile jaws come on from the side SR and close so it looks as though Hook as walked straight into
the mouth of the crocodile
(This bit can be done in slow motion or with strobe)
Hook Mummy!