THE BITS…
Neil Patrick Harris now claims that there were no computer graphics used when he went onstage at the Academy Awards in his underwear. However, he did admit to having an Oscar statuette stuffed inside his briefs.
Acclaimed astrophysicist Stephen Hawking now says that in order for mankind to survive, we've got to colonize outer space. Sure, now that a guy wins an Oscar for playing him in a movie he thinks he’s some sort of scientist.
Alex Rodriguez showed up at the New York Yankees spring training facilities in Tampa yesterday. For the first time in recent memory, hecklers were the only things needling Rodriguez.
The Atlanta Braves’ B.J. Upton says he’s going back to his birth name of Melvin Upton Jr. Hopefully, he doesn’t go back to asking his girlfriend for melvins.
Veterans Affairs Secretary Robert McDonald has apologized for falsely claiming he served with the Special Forces. Out of force of habit, McDonald was suspended for six months by NBC News.
As of today, marijuana use is legal in Alaska. Just imagine what Sarah Palin will be seeing from her house now.
Mattel is introducing a new version of Barbie that connects to the internet. Unfortunately, she then gives Ken a computer virus.
Mattel is introducing a new version of Barbie that connects to the internet. The problem is that after you connect Barbie to the Internet, you can’t get her to stop uploading nude selfies.
SON OF THE BITS…
According to a new study, spending time in a sauna may help you live longer. Apparently Jacuzzis can also help you live longer. The guys in Hot Tub Time Machine 2 went 10 years into the future and they still look the same.
A British woman claims that she hasn’t smiled or laughed for 40 years in order to prevent wrinkles. The woman says she’s able to keep from laughing by watching Adam Sandler movies.
A British woman claims that in order to prevent wrinkles she hasn’t smiled or laughed for 40 years. The woman says it’s been easy not to smile or laugh for that long because she’s been married 40 years.
A woman in Mexico was arrested after she was caught pleasuring herself in a movie theater showing Fifty Shades of Grey. The good news for the woman is that thanks to policeshe got to experience handcuffs.
A woman in Mexico was arrested after she was caught pleasuring herself in a movie theater showing Fifty Shades of Grey. The strange thing is she did it before the movie while they were showing the trivia questions.
Scientists now say that penguins can't taste the fish they eat. It’s sort of like when people eat at Long John Silver’s.
A new report says online news websites are purposely posting false stories just to get people to visit their sites. At least that’s what I read on an online news website.
Researches now say that early exposure to peanuts helps prevent allergies in kids. However, they said there was no benefit in exposing kids to Wizard of Id.
TODAY’S BITMAN AUDIO…
Today on the Bitman audio feed we have clips from The Bachelor, The Voice season premiere, Better Call Saul and a late night roundup with Dave, The Jimmys,Seth, Conan and the Late, Late Show.
It’s all at
Not hearing anything? TV Sound bites are available at BitmanComedy.com! If you need access to the site, contact Adrienne Munos at United Stations Radio Network at 561-381-7598 or
TINSELTOWN TATTLER…
Make that 100 problems for JAY Z! An old photo of Jay Z and Wanda Satterthwaite has surfaced. She’s the woman claiming to be the mother of his son, Rymir. A source tells an online gossip site, “Jay Z knows he used to smash Wanda [regularly] back in the day,” adding that “Wanda told Rymir that Jay Z is his dad.” Rymirand his godmother Lillie Coley have taken legal action against Jay, demanding that he take a paternity test. This isn’t a first for Jay Z as a model named Shanelle Scott made similar claims a few years ago and he reportedly cut her a seven-figure check to go away.
The battle over BOBBI KRISTINA BROWN continues as Nick Gordon tweeted a screen grab of a text he sent Bobby Brown saying, "Man to man I love your daughter... I don't know why you won't let me see her...Your daughter is going to hate you when she wakes up. It's not like you know her anyways. What's her favorite color? What's her favorite smell, movies, food. You don't know. I forgive you she won't." However, Brown's lawyer says Nick apparently isn’t too desperate to visit Bobbi Kristina, otherwise he’d talk to authorities regarding their criminal investigation. The Brown family has reportedly told Nick he could visit her if he comes clean about events surrounding the bathtub incident.
Fellow passengers aboard a JetBlue flight earlier this month from Los Angeles to New York are dishing about what it was like to fly with LADY GAGA!They say she made herself at home in the business-class Mint section of the flight with her French bulldog Asia, who was wearing what looked like a diamond necklace. While the dog visited passengers in nearby rows, two men stood guard near Gaga for the entire flight. About 30 minutes before landing, a team of makeup and wardrobe personnel began working on Gaga. A source said, "There were wigs flying around and one "landed on a passenger's lap."
TINSELTOWN TATTLER 2…
If there is anything to those RIHANNA and LEONARDO DICAPRIO romance rumors, CHRIS BROWN is giving it his blessing. In an interview, Brown said of the possible relationship, "I respect her enough to respect her privacy and her space, because I can't believe everything I hear in the news. But what I see, I'll be like, 'OK cool, there might be something else going on.'" Brown added, "Ain't nowhere else you could have went though. High five. You can only go up, and that's the upper, upper echelon...I'm not even a hater. I'll give you a slap on the back, booty, everything, 'Hey, do your thing. Good game.' In that situation, I just tip my hat. I'm not a hater. I'm not envious, I don't feel jealous. Do your thing. I can't have it all, brotha." (Hear here)
Some people are grumbling over the Oscars ‘In Memoriam’ segment. Melissa Rivers was upset about her mom, JOAN RIVERS, being snubbed. While Joan wasn’t known for movies, she did appear in several films and covered the red carpet for years. Conrad Negron is also upset that his brother Taylor Negron, who appeared in "Fast Times at Ridgemont High" and "The Last Boy Scout," was left out. Negron said, "They'll have Neil Patrick Harris come out in his underwear but not take a few seconds to honor my brother."Taylor's cousin, Three Dog Night’s Chuck Negron, added "They'll let Patricia Arquette go on and on forever but they won't give Taylor the 15 minutes he deserved."
There were a couple of Oscars wardrobe malfunctions. While EMMA STONE walked the red carpet she lifted up f her gown and exposed what was below. Luckily for Emma, she wasn’t going commando! Meanwhile, at the Vanity Fair afterparty, Victoria's Secret model BEHATI PRINSLOOsuffered a nip slip!
What’s next for TOM BRADY after his football career comes to an end? Following his cameo in the movie Ted 2, he reportedly wants to pursue acting. However, rumor has it that wife GISELE BUNDCHEN doesn’t like the idea of him cozying up to other actresses on set.
TINSELTOWN TATTLER 3…
Celebrity chef GUY FIERIpresided over a mass wedding for 101 same-sex couples at Miami’s South Beach Wine & Food Festival this past weekend. Fieri married all of the couples in honor of his late sister, who was a lesbian.
Star Trek actor LEONARD NIMOY was reportedly rushed to the hospitallast week with severe chest pains. Last year Nimoy revealed that he had the lung ailment known as COPD due to smoking in his younger days.Nimoy has been in and out of hospitals several times in the last few months. No word on whether he’s out of the hospital yet, but Nimoy is tweeting and signing off those tweets with his trademark‘Live long and prosper.’
BEN WOOLF, who plays Meep on "American Horror Story: Freak Show," has died from injuries suffered last week when he was hit by a passing car in Hollywood. The official cause of death was a stroke that he suffered yesterday afternoon while under heavy sedation at Cedars-Sinai Medical Center.Woolf got clipped in the head by the side view mirror of an SUV as he was jaywalking.
DATELINE HOLLYWOOD…
New Movies on DVD:
Big Hero 6 - An animated robot tale.
Horrible Bosses 2 - Jason Bateman, Charlie Day and Jason Sudeikis kidnap their investor's son.
New TV on DVD:
Mountain Men: Season 3
Sons of Anarchy: The Complete Series
The DANCING WITH THE STARS celebrities will be announced this morning on Good Morning America and openly gay football player Michael Sam will reportedly be one of them.
The TV ratings for THE ACADEMY AWARDS were down 16 percent from last year with an average of just 36.6 million viewers tuning in. It was the lowest ratings for the Oscars since 2009 when Slumdog Millionaire was the big winner.
WESLEY SNIPES has joined the cast of the NBC pilot Endgame. The show is set in Las Vegas and follows a former sniper-turned-security expert who's drawn into a mysterious conspiracy that forces him to complete a series of challenges in order to save innocent lives.
CALISTA FLOCKHART has joined the cast of the CBS pilot Supergirl. She’ll play the owner of the media empire that Supergirl works for under her secret identity. GLEE'S MELISSA BENOIST will star as Supergirl.
MUSIC NOTES…
New Music in Stores Today…
The Airborne Toxic Event - “Dope Machines”
Alien Ant Farm - “Always and Forever”
Big Sean - “Dark Sky Paradise” (guests: Drake, John Legend, Kanye West, Lil Wayne, etc.)
Black Rebel Motorcycle Club - “Live in Paris” (CD/DVD set)
Chris Brown & Tyga - “Fan of a Fan: The Album”
Gang of Four - “What Happens Next”
Mat Kearney - “Just Kids”
Kid Rock - “First Kiss”
Andy Kim - “It’s Decided”
Scorpions - “Return to Forever”
Rick Springfield - “Stripped Down” (CD/DVD; from recent acoustic tour)
Reissues (CDs / vinyl)
Chicago - “Live in ’75” (two-CD set)
Led Zeppelin - “Physical Graffiti (Deluxe Edition)” (1975 album; remastered, with bonus material)
Melanie - “Candles in the Rain”
Vanity Fare - “I Live for the Sun: Complete Recordings 1968-74"
White Plains - “The Deram Records Singles Collection”
DVD / Blu-ray
The J. Geils Band - “House Party: Live in Germany [DVD]” (filmed at the Grugahalle in Essen on April 21, 1979, for the German TV series “Rockpalast”)
The Who - “Live: Calgary Alberta CA 10/05/06 [DVD],” “Live: Holmdel NJ 09/21/06 [DVD],” “Live: London ON CA 09/30/06 [DVD],” “Live: Vancouver CA 10/08/06 [DVD]”
MUSIC NOTES 2…
THE DARKNESS will release their next album, called Last of Our Kind, on June 1st. They also rolled out a new animated video for the first single "Barbarian," described as a tale of medieval violence. The band will also embark on what they call "a small but perfectly formed tour" in March.
BEN HARPER got married on New Year’s Day to social advocate Jaclyn Matfus, although they kept it under wraps until now.Harper and actor Laura Dern divorced in 2013. Harper also announced plans to reunite The Innocent Criminals and they’ll kick off a world tour on May 25th in San Francisco.
To celebratetheir 40th anniversary, RUSHis reissuingalbums from their Mercury Records catalog in chronological order every month in 2015. For March, it’ll be their classic 2112 that includes a hologram of the album art when played. Look for it on March 17th. (See here)
SAM SMITH has announced plans for a North American tour. Smith kicks the tour off on July 17th at the Forecastle Festival in Louisville. Tickets will go on sale beginning Friday.
LORDE is getting set to hit the studio in the next few weeks to begin working on her next album. Collaborator Joel Little said, “I think we're just going to start writing and when it starts to feel right, we'll know that it's right."
KELLY CLARKSON’S new album Piece by Piece hits stores next week and she’s released the second single, “Invincible,” which was written by SIA. (Hear here)
SIAactually showed off her face for cameras at Elton John's Oscar-viewing party. While it wasn’t the first time she’s shown her face, it's been awhile. (See here)
MUSIC NOTES 3…
Will KANYE WEST and RIHANNAtour together? Live Nation in Finland recently posted a show billed to "Kanye & Rihanna" set to take place on July 25th in Estonia. The on-sale date was listed as March 5th, but the post was later removed. Rihanna opened for Kanye on his Glow in the Dark tour in 2008.
A Cleveland TV news anchor found herself in hot water after commenting on LADY GAGA’S Sound Of Music medley at the Oscars. Beauty queen-turned-news anchor Kristi Capel said, "It's hard to really hear [Gaga's] voice with all the jigaboo music that she does, or whatever you want to call it. She has a gorgeous voice -- I never knew!" Kristi later said she had no idea it was really a word or that it was an old racial slur.
An expanded version of 1983’s MOTOWN 25 TV special will air on PBS this Saturday. That’s the special where MICHAEL JACKSON unveiled the "Moonwalk." PBS will offer up a new seven-CD box set of classic Motown hits, album tracks and rarities for those who pledge, although the set will also be sold elsewhere.
If you’re looking for a new house, RONNIE DEVOEof NEW EDITIONand BELL BIV DEVOE fame has just opened DeVoe Real Estate in Georgia and plans to open a branch office in L.A. and partner with established brokers in the area.
KANYE WEST says that the other night when he went out to dinner with Taylor Swift the restaurant was playing the Grammy-winning BECK album in the background. Kanye says, "I was like, 'Man, this is kind of good. I ain't gonna lie.' I got his number, and I'm supposed to call him, but just keep forgetting."
TUBULAR…
Daytime:
GMA: ``Dancing With the Stars'' celebrity cast announcement
Today:Kid Rock performs; Tiffani Thiessen
Kelly & Michael: Martin Short
The View: Guest hosts Stacy London and Samantha Ponder; Kate Walsh
The Talk: Entertainment reporter Jessica Radloff
Ellen:Will Smith; Little Big Town performs
Primetime:
Fox: Master Chef Junior Editionseason finale
NBC: The Voice blind auditions continue, plus the series finale of Parks and Recreation.
ESPN: College hoops Wisconsin at Maryland and Texas A&M at Arkansas
ESPN2: College hoopsTexas at West Virginia
NBC Sports: NHLFlyers at Hurricanes
Late Night:
Jimmy Kimmel: Will Forte; Bella Thorne; Prince Royce performs
David Letterman:Matthew Broderick; JD McPherson performs
Jimmy Fallon: Josh Duhamel; Gabrielle Union; Charlie Wilson performs
Late, Late Show:Guest host Billy Gardell; TV host Jeff Probst
Seth Meyers: The cast of Parks and Recreation
Conan: Victoria Justice
THE WATERCOOLER…
United Airlines recently goofed and accidentally posted $50 fares for first-class overseas flights. A bunch of people snapped them up before United realized the mistake and the airline said it wouldn’t honor the tickets. The people that bought them went to the U.S. Department of Transportation arguing that United should be bound by the agency's consumer protection rules requiring airlines to honor so-called mistake fares.However, the hopeful travelersare out of luck as the departmentruled United was off the hook in part because customers "had to manipulate the search process" to produce a "conversion error" to get the low fares.
Smoking, growing and possessing marijuana becomes legal in Alaska starting today. Alaska has becomethe third state to legalize recreational marijuana thanks to an unlikely coalition of libertarians, individualists and small-government Republicans. Voters approved legalizing marijuana last November by a margin of 52-48 percent. However, smoking marijuana in public is still banned and while adult Alaskans can keep, use, transport, grow and give pot away, they can’t sell it. A regulated and taxed marijuana market won't start until 2016 at the earliest.
If you’re worried about the dangers of marijuana – don’t be. New research finds that among things people take to get high or drunk, marijuana is the least fatal. Researchers compared lethal doses of various recreational substances to the amount people normally consume and found that the deadliest is alcohol, followed by heroin, cocaine, tobacco, ecstasy, and meth. The conclusion was that marijuana was 114 times less likely to kill you than alcohol. In fact, the study found that marijuana is the only drug that posed a low mortality risk to its users. However, researches noted that marijuana is still addictive, you shouldn’t smoke it while pregnant, and it may be a threat to cognitive functioning.