Emotion coaching in practice: Case study in a Children’s Centre 2 ½ year old boy

Maria is an early years practitioner and works in a Children’s Centre in a disadvantaged rural area and tells the following story where emotion coaching worked like ‘a magic bullet’ as she calls it:

We have a 2 ½ year old boy who attends our ‘play and stay’ group at my children’s centre. He has with global developmental delays and comes from a difficult back ground

This incident happened at the end of the group, when he and his carer had to leave with his younger sister. His immediate reaction was to throw himself into the ball pit tent, facing the wall and scream and bang his head on the wall. His carer, who was struggling with the baby girl, shouted at him to get out at once. There was no response.

At this point I offered to take over and crawled into the tent. I said his name and said that I could see that he was very upset and that I would be upset too if I had to go home after having so much fun. At this point he stopped banging his head but was still sobbing quietly, facing the wall.

I gave him a little time and just sat with him reminding him that it was ok to feel upset about leaving the fun toys. Then I added:

‘Well, I will be here next week, and so will all the toys’.

By now he had stopped crying and was looking at me sideways. I then said,

’I know! If we put all the toys away in their special boxes then we can make sure they are all there for you to play with again when you come to the group, do you think that’s a good idea?’

He nodded and took my hand to lead me out of the tent then proceeded to help me put the trucks in their blue box. While we were working together I also talked about how banging his head might hurt him and that we could think of different things to do when he felt upset.

After lots more positive reinforcement we went and got his coat and he let me put it on. I repeated that I would be there the next week and that by putting the toys away we could find them to play with again.

He hasn’t had that reaction to going home since. The emotion coaching really seemed to get through to him instantly, I think it was because I managed to get to the situation before it escalated so he was quick to calm.

From: Rose, J. and Gilbert, L. (2012) The 0-19 Melksham Resilience Project Report, Bath Spa University