Guspicks up Three of a Kind

July 1962

GUSPICKS UP THREE OF A KIND

byMartinBunn

"Brokenanylawslately,Boss?"

GusWilsonlookedquizzicallyatStan,hisassistant. "Withsomanyonthebooks,whoknows? Why?"

"ChiefEldonjustparkedoutside."

SamEldon,aleanmaninaloose-fittinguniform,whosesaggingjowlsgavehimtheappearanceofadowncastbloodhound,enteredtheModelGarage.

"HiSam. Wouldacupo'coffeelightenthisdarkdayforyou?"askedGus.

TheChiefofPolicetiltedbackhisgoldbraidedcap. "Ifthattaryoubrewdoesn'tkillme. Let'stryit."

Mugsinhand,theylookedateachotherinthecomfortofGus'soffice.

"SureisadarkdaywhenIhavetoaskhelpfromanoldfraudlikeyou,Gus,"beganEldonmorosely.

"Alwaysreadytohelpyoukeepthejobyougotbycheatingonthepolice-schoolexams."RetortedGusamiably.

"Gotaproblemconcerningacustomerofyours-SilasBarnstable."

Gusgrinned. "WebothknowSilas. What'shissquawkthistime?"

"SilaswantstochargeyoungTommyBarneswithmaliciousmischiefonhiscar. Tommyhadmeans,motive,andopportunity,soI'vegottolookintoit."

Gusfrowned. "What'sitallabout?"

"YouknowtheBarneshouseisnexttoBarnstable'swithdrivewayssidebyside. Thekidworksonhishotrodinhis. Aweekago,themufflerblewout;,thecarmadequitearacket."

"Hecameinhereandboughtanewmuffleraboutthen,"saidGus.

"Iknow,BarnstablecamedemandingthatIarrestTommyfordisturbingthepeace. SeewhatImeanbymotive?"

"No,Idon't,"saidGus. "Tommy'dhardlydamageSilas'scarforthat."

"Itsmotive,"saidEldon. "BarnstablejustgotasecondhandPlymouthsix. DayafterIwarnedBarnes,thiscarwasinBarnstable'sdrive. Whenhewenttostarttheengine,therewassomekindofexplosionunderthehood. "ThenhenoticedTommywatching.

"Grinninglikeafiend,"asSilasputit."

"Didthecarstart?"

"NoSilaslookedunderthehood. Somethinghadblownoffthedistributorcap. Hemademelookatit. Therewasnopaper,wadding,wire,oranythingelsefromadetonator,Iputthecapbackon. Theenginestarted.

"NowwhatIwanttoknow,Gus,"saidEldonwithalugubriousexpression,"iswhetheryou'verunacrossanysuchthingthatplainlywasn'tsabotage?"

"Sure,"saidGuspromptly. "Onthesamemodel,threeorfouryearsold. Whatusuallymakesithappen...

"Stowit!"interruptedEldon,gettingup.

"AllIneedtoknowisthatitcanhappeninnocently." Theshrewdhound'seyesgazedatGus. "Samemodel,hey? I'mgoingtotellSilastoshutup."

AnangryhornblastbroughtStanoutfromunderthecarliftasadust-coveredpaneltruckrolledintoastopbesidehim.

"Anybodyawakehere?"snarledthebeefyyoungdriver.

Stancheckedaretort."Anythingwecandoforyou?"

"We?" Theyouthlookedaround,"Isupposeyou'vegottenmechanics,onlytheothernineareouttolunch? Youcanfixmylefthandblinker,Golook."

Hejerkedathumbbackwards. Goingaroundthecar,Stansawthelefttaillightcomeonandglowsteadilyunderencrusteddirt. Asitwentout,therightonebeganblinking.

"Gotit?"askedthedriver. "Right,yes;left,no. Fixit. Copinyourjerkwatertowntaggedmefornotsignalingaleftturn. AndI'vegoteightdeliveriestomakehere,"

Stancheckedthewires. Nonewerecrossedattheflasherorshortingtoothers.

"Bulbcouldbebad,"hesaid.

"Justputanewoneinmyself. Tryanotherflasher."

Standid. Theleft-turnsignalanditsmateupfrontlitbutdidnotblink.

Hetriedtheparkinglights. Bothlampsglowedunderthedirt-coveredlenses.

"Itoldyoubothfilamentsareokay." Growledthebelligerentyouth.

Stanrecheckedthewiringandflasherconnections. HehadfoundnothingwrongwhenGusreturnedfromlunch.

Stanexplainedtheproblem. "I'dsayheputthebulbinupsidedown,"hefinished,"exceptthatit'sthekindofoffsetpinyoucan'tputinwrong."

"Takeoffboththosedirtylensesandlookagain."Gussuggested.

Stanremovedthem. Theleftbumpburnedmorebrightlythantheright.Heswitchedofftheparkinglights,hadthedriverholddownthebrakepedal. Theleftstoplightwasdim,therightbright.

"Wouldyoutakeoutthatbulbyouputin?"Stanaskedthedriver.

Hetried. Surprisedhegrunted,putagloveonhishand,andtriedagain. Thelittleglassglobedidn'tbudge. HeshookhisheadandglaredatStan.

"Crummysocket'sshot;Ihadadevilofatimeputtingthatbulbin. WhyshouldItakeitout?"

"Becauseyoubullheadeditinupsidedown!"snappedStan. "Itshouldbeimpossible-thebasepinsarespacedtofitsteppedshotsinthesocket-butyoudidit. I'llhavetobreakthebulbtogetitout."

"Soleaveit!Itlightsupontheturnsignal. Justmakeitflash."

"Theflashertakesacertainamountofcurrenttomakeandbreak. Thislow-candlepowerfilamentdoesn'tpullenoughjuicetoworkit. Youwantthebulbputinrightornot?"

Gus,hisbackturned,saidnothingbutmentallyapplauded. Fiveminuteslatertheleft-turnsignalworkedfine.

"SergeantGillspeaking,"saidthephoneinGus'sear. "ChiefEldonasksifyou'dcometotheBarnstablehouse."

Gusgroaned,butfiveminuteslaterhewasatSilasBarnstable's. Nexttothechief'scarstoodatruckfromanewcut-rategarage. ItsoveralleddriveraswellasChiefEldonandSilasBarnstable,sour-visagedasever,werewaitingalongsideSilas'scar. Alittleapartwasskinny,tow-hairedTommyBarnes,tryingnottolookscared.

"MeetEdHickson,Gus,"saidEldon,"Silaswantedhisownexpert."

Thestrangerwavedahand.

"Halfanhourago,"Eldonwenton,"Silashappenedtolookouthere..."

"Happened?Iwaswatching,'causeIknewhe'dtryagain,"growledSilas.

"HesawTommycrawlunderhiscarandstayseveralminutes. Sohecalledme. Whenwetriedtheengine,somethingblewoffthedistributorcap. We'reheretofindoutifTommy'sresponsible."

"I'mnot!"protestedTommy. "Oneofmychromedheadnutsfellandrolledunderhiscar. Ittookmethatlongtofindit." Heheldoutagleamingnut.

"Bah!"rumbledSilas. "Hereachedupanddidsomethingtomyengine."

EldonturnedtoHickson. "Youthinkthiscapcouldblowoffbyitself?"

"Notlikely. Thatstoryaboutalostnutsoundsprettythintome..."

"You'renotheretojudgethat,"snappedEldon. "Couldithappen?"

Hicksonshrugged. "Ifabreather'splugged,orthere'sblowbypasttherings,crankcasepressuremightcomeupthedistributorshaft. I'vefixeditbydrillingaone-eighthholeinthecaptoletthepressureout.

"But,headdedwithasideglanceatSilas. "IcheckedthecompressiononthiscarbeforeMr.Barnstableboughtit. Ringsareokayandthebreather'sclean."

"Howaboutthat,Gus?" askedEldon. "Isheright?"

"Howwouldtherebebackpressure,"askedGus,"beforetheenginehasstarted?"

"Maybecrankingdoesit,"saidHicksonquickly. "Anyway,thesesixeshaveweakdistributorclips. I'vehadtobend'embacktoholdthecaptight."

"Letstryourluckandseeifithappensagain,"suggestedGus.

Gentlybendingacurvebackintothestraightenedclips,heputonthecap. AtanodfromEldon,Silascrankedtheengine. Therewasasmallexplosion. Thecaplifted,settledbackundertheclips.

"Lucky!"exclaimedGus,snappingoffthecap. Bluesmokedriftedup.

"Smellslikeexhaust!saidTommy.

"Whynot?"askedGus. It'sfromanexplosionofgasvaporandair."

"Ohsure,thiscarpullsgasintothedistributor!" sneeredHickson.

SilentlyGuspulledoffthedistributorand,astheotherswatched,tookoffthevacuumadvance. Carefullyheopenedthistoexposethediaphragm.

"Takearealcloselook,Chief."

Thechiefdidso. "Lookslikealotofpinholesinthediaphragm."
"Onesideofit'sconnectedtotheintakemanifold,"explainedGus,"socrankingtheenginecansendgasvaportoit. Somegetsthroughthosepinholesintothedistributor. Whenthere'sjustenoughgasandair,thesparkatthepointscansetitoff."

"Hicksonfixedthat,"saidSilashotly.

"WhatdoyouthinkI'mpayinghimfor?"

"No,sir-theholedrilledinthecaponlykeepstheexplosionfromblowingthecapoff."RepliedGus.

ChiefEldonturnedtoSilas. "StillwantTommybooked?"

"I-uh,no. SeemsmaybeI'mwrong."

Guslaidthevacuumadvancebesidethedetacheddistributor.

"Hey,now!"roaredBarnstable. "Who'sgoingtoputmycartogether?"

"MaybeGuswill,"saidthechief. "Afteryou'vepaidhimforaroadcall."

"I'lltakecareofit,"putinHickson.

"That'llbefivebucksinall."

"Billmesomeyear!"snarledBarnstable.

"NexttimeIwantanotherbotchjob,I'lllookyouup... Hey,Gus!"

Gus,onthewaybacktohiscar,pausedandturnedaround.

"I'llpayyouforcomingoutifyou'llputonanewvacuumdiaphragm,"whinedSilas. Gusgrinned. "Bringitinnexttimeyou'reintown."

Silasturnedonwhathebelievedtobeaningratiatingsmile. "Nowdon'toverchargemebecauseImadeamistakeaboutyoungBarnes,"hepleaded.

"Okay,Silas."Gussaidwithasigh. "Butyou'rethethirdtoday."

"Third? Thirdwhat?"

"Screwball,"saidthegrinningchief.

"Stanhadthefirst,"saidGus. "Hicksonwithhishole-in-thecapcurewasthesecond.

You'rethethirdtohaveallthefactsbutinsistonputtingthemtogetherupsidedown.

END