Cat and Chris
November 11th, 2015
Christmas Farm Inn
11:11 a.m.
Welcome:
On behalf of Chris and Cat, I would like to welcome you all here and thank you for joining us on this magnificent day in the White Mountains. For many of you, it was not easy to get here – we realize New Hampshire is quite a trek – and the couple wishes to thank everyone who could make the journey.
Your presence here, to be witnesses on this day, shows this couple how much you care about them, and it means a lot to them. Whether you were born into their families or you have become family through years of love, laughs, and liquor, know that from here on out their love will be distributed based on the retail value of your gifts.
Intentions:
Chris, will you have Cat as your wife, in times of good fortune as well as adversity, forsaking all others to be a kind and faithful husband?
Will you base your life with Cat on love, caring, and understanding?
Will you embrace her adventurous spirit and be considerate of her wishes and desires?
Will you allow her free access to nom the bite-ton?
Chris says: I will
Cat, will you have Chris as your husband, in times of good fortune as well as adversity, forsaking all others to be a kind and faithful wife?
Will you base your life with Chris on love, caring, and understanding?
Will you embrace his adventurous spirit and be considerate of his wishes and desires?
Will you massage his feet when they are littered with bunions and his toenails look like corn chips?
Cat says: I will
Vows:
Chris, please repeat after me
Cathy, you are my best friend and soul mate.
I have drafted you to be my teammate
To explore many new exciting adventures together
And be there for each other
for all of our numerous misadventures
I will do my best to share my feelings from here on in
And listen to you when you need to just vent
andto let you watch Buffy freely.
I look forward to growing together,
getting to know you more and more,
and falling in love a little more every day.
May the heavens fall, nations crumble, or comets strike the earth,
May I get yellow jaundice, scurvy, the shakes,
cleft eyeballs, long foot and Norwegian Bloat.
This I vow to you
Cat, please repeat after me
Chris, you are my deviant partner in crime
You are the Butthead to my Beavis
I choose you to be my husband
To give you my love and compassion
in all its random forms
To always honor and obey
unless you are clearly mistaken
To adore and cherish you and our happy little family
From fun scenic views to crazy Veek blizzards
and everything in between.
Chris you are my love and my heart
For forever to the power of getz
Ring Ceremony:
The rings you are about to exchange, symbolize the integrity in your relationship. May they also provide a reminder to share freely in the giving and receiving of joy and love in your marriage together.
Chris, please repeat after me
Cat, I give you this ring
as a symbol of joining our hearts and spirits
May you wear it with peace and joy.
Cat, please repeat after me
Chris, I give you this ring
as a symbol of joining our hearts and spirits
May you wear it with peace and joy.
Pronouncement:
And now it gives me great pleasure to say, by the power vested in me by the State of New Hampshire, I now pronounce you husband and wife!
(Kiss!)
Thank you all for attending. Please head to the main building to enjoy some wine and cheese before lunch.