Resources
- Bereavemement & Loss stories
- Feelings & emotions
- Workbooks
- Stories & poems worth knowing about
- Information & reference books
- Games and other resources
Bereavement & Loss stories
Durant, Alan (2003) Always and Forever. London: Random House Children’s Books.
ISBN 0552548774. Price: £5.99 (paperback). Age range: 5 to10.
When Fox dies, his friends think that they will never get over their great sadness. Through the winter a great silence falls on them and they are all inconsolable. When spring comes, they begin to remember the funny things that Fox used to do, and realise that he is still in their hearts and memories and will be always and forever.
Halliday, Nicholas (2006) The Lonely Tree.London: Halliday Books in association with The Child Bereavement Trust and The Tree Council. ISBN 0953945987, Price: £7.99. Age range: 5 to 8 years.
This is a life affirming tale of how love and friendship can help to heal grief. After a long, cold and lonely winter, spring brings both sadness and joy to the evergreen as he finds ways to adapt without oak who has died.
Harris, Robie H. (2001) Goodby, Mousie. London: Simon & Schuster.
ISBN 0 743 46213 0. Price £4.99. Age range: 3 to 6 years.
A young boy can’t first believe his pet mouse has died. But gradually, with the help of his parents he expresses his feelings and comes to terms with the death. A gentle introduction to death for young children.
Perkins, Ginny (1996) Remembering my brother. London: A & C Black (Publishers).
ISBN 0 7136 4541 5. Price (£3.25 Amazon: out of print). Age range: 5 to 11 years.
A true story with photographs, young Greg tells how he and the rest of his family remember his older brother, Chris, who died. Sometimes Greg is sad thinking about his brother but realises that’s part of loving him.
Perkins, Ginny (1996) Remembering Mum. London: A & C Black (Publishers).
ISBN 9780713644326. Price: £7.99. Age range: 5 to 11 years.
A true story with photographs, showing two young boys and their dad carrying on with ordinary events of life alongside the trauma they feel; emphasises the importance of talking about bereavement and of remembering
Sunderland, Margot (2003) The Day the Sea Went Out and Never Came Back. London: Speechmark Publishing Ltd. ISBN: 0 86388 463 6. Price £7.99. Age range: 5 to 8 years.
Eric the sand dragon, who loves the sea, experiences the deep pain of loss when the sea doesn’t return. With the help of a friend, Eric finds a way through his sadness and hurt.
Sunderland, Margot (2000). The Frog who Longed for the Moon to Smile. Oxon: Winslow Press Limited.
ISBN: 0 86388 304 4. (New edition) Price: £7.99 Age range 5 to 8.
Frog yearns to see the moon smile again. In yearning for something he cannot retrieve and focusing on the loss, he is missing the joy and friendship near him. A persistent friend helps Frog see what he is missing.
Simmonds, Posy (1987) Fred.London: Random House Children’s Books.
ISBN: 0 09 926 412 9. Price £4.99 Age range: 5 to 8 years.
Fred is a cat that is much loved. He has died. Sophie and Nick share sadness and loneliness, and the joy they experience when joining in the cat community to celebrate the dear memory of Famous Fred.
Smith, Walter (2007) Grandad’s Ashes. London: Jessica Kingsley Publishers.
ISBN: 978 1 84310 517 6. Price £9.99. Age range: 4 to 8 years.
In a search to find grandad’s favourite place to scatter his ashes four children and their grandma face many challenges, and come to remember the good times with grandad.
Varley, Susan. (1985) Badger’s Parting Gifts. London: Picture Lions.
ISBN: 0006643175. Price: £4.99. Age range: 5 to 10 years.
When old Badger dies, his friends think they will be sad forever. But gradually they are able to remember him with joy and gratitude and to treasure the gifts he left each one of them. A sensitively written, highly acclaimed book which helps children come to terms with the death of someone they love. Available in other languages.
Viorst, Judith (1971) The Tenth Good Thing About Barney. New York: Prentice Hall
ISBN: 0689712030. Price: £4.00. Age range: 5 to 10 years.
A touching look at death of a pet from the perspective of a child. Attention given to helping children deal with the reality of any death.
Feeling/emotions books
Series from Wayland Publishers. Illustrated by Mike Gordon Age range: 4 to 9 years.
Moses, Brian: I feel jealous; I feel angry; I feel sad; I feel frightened; It’s not fair; I’m lonely; I’m bored;
I’m worried.
Bryant-Mole, Karen: I’m happy; I’m shy
Green, Jen: I feel bullied.
Brownjohn, Emma (2003) All kinds of FeelingsLondon:Tango Books Ltd.
ISBN: 978 1 85707 596 0. Price £9.99. Age range: 4 to 8 years.
Lift the flap book that explores different feelings and shows that its okay to accept and trust your feelings. Includes ‘feeling game’ with a spinner & wipe-clean board blank face for readers to explore their own feelings.
Holmes, Margaret M. (2000) A terrible thing happenedWashingtonDC: Magination Press.
ISBN 1 55789 642 8. Price £ 4.99. Age range: 4 to 8 years.
The young raccoon saw something terrible, tried to ignore it but began to feel nervous, angry and do mean things. With the help of a kind adult, he begins to express and talk about the feelings and experience. Expressive illustrations.
Mundy, Michaelene (1998) Sad Isn’t Bad and Mad Isn’t Bad. St. Meindra Indiana: Abbey Press
Sad ISBN: 0870293214. Mad ISBN 978 0 87029 Price £4.99. Age range: 6 to 9 years.
These books offer children reassurance, promoting the idea that challenging feelings are normal and healthy, and you can do something about them. By reading together, adults may support children.
Oram, Hiawyn (1993) Angry Arthur. London: Red Fox
ISBN: 0 09 919661 1. Price £4.99 Age range: 4 to 8 years.
A story that addresses something known to every child but not much spoken about: deep frustrated rage. A topic that needs addressing with some children, but the story’s ending might require creativity from the adult reader to encourage the child to create a further ending, or else Anger might simply meant distruction.
Rosen, Michael (2004) Michael Rosen’s Sad Book. London: Walker Books
ISBN 978 1 4063 1316 1. Price £7.99. Age range:
The author’s personal heartbreaking honest account of grief and how to cope with it, supported by expressive and emotive illustrations by Quentin Blake.
Silver, Norman (1999) Temper, Temper. Hove: Macdonald Young Books.
ISBN; 0 7500 2704 5. Price TBC. Age range: 4 to 9 years.
A boy and his temper – presented as a hairy monster – and how he overcomes it by simply ignoring it. An honest story with clear brightly coloured illustrations.
Viorst, Judith (1972) Alexander and the Terrible, Horrible, No good, Very Bad Day. New York: Aladdin Paperbacks. ISBN: 0 689 71173 5. Price £5.99
Alexander shares his very bad day. “Some days are just like that,” says his mom. A story that helps children understand that sometimes you can have a bad day without giving a reason.
Workbooks
Crossley Diana (2000) Muddles, Puddles and Sunshine Gloucestershire: Hawthorn Press.
ISBN: 1869890582. Price: £4.99. Age range: 5 to 10 years.
Offering practical and sensitive support for bereaved children, this appealingly illustrated book suggests a series of creative activities and exercises. This workbook aims to help children make sense of their experience by reflecting on different aspects of their grief.
Gilber, Shelley (2004) Grief Encounter London: National Children’s Bureau Publications
ISBN: 1 904787 21 5. Price: £22.00. Age range 5 to 11 years.
A workbook to encourage conversations about loss between children and adults
Goldman, Linda (2006) Children also grieve: talking about death & healing. London: Jessica Kingsley Publishers.
ISBN: 1 84310 808 9. Price: £15.99. Age range 8 to 15 years.
An interactive story book with photographs has Henry the pet dog sharing the family’s story of grief and asks questions to prompt the reader to work through their grief; memory book The second half of the book is a “memory album” designed to be filled in and dedicated to the person who has died.
Heegard, Marge (1988) When someone very special dies. Minneapolis, MN: Woodland Press
ISBN: 0 9620 502 02. Price £9.95. Age range 9 to12 years.
Statements and questions invite a child, with the supervision of an adult, to illustrate their feelings and thoughts about death, and to encourage the child to identify support systems and personal strengths.
Stokes, J. & Oxley, P (2006) Out of the Blue. Stroud, Glosc.: Hawthorn Press.
ISBN: 1 903458 71 4. Price £7.99. Age range: 11 to16 years.
A collection of tried and tested ideas to help young people express their thoughts and feelings and to remember the person who died.
Turner, Mary (1998) Talking with Children and Young People about Death and Dying: A WorkbookLondon: Jessica Kingsley Publishers
ISBN: 1 85302 563 1. Price: £9.95. Age range 9 to11years.
Simple questions with black and white illustrations are used to help promote discussion and expression of feelings, fears and thoughts. Space is given for the child’s own drawings.
Stories & poems worth knowing about
Browne, Anthony (1984) Willy the Wimp. London: Walker Books
ISBN: 0 7445 4363-0. Price £4.99. Age range 4 to 8 years.
Illustrated with Brown’s usual wit and unique eye catching illustrations which appeal to children, telling the humorous story about a wimp who changes his image. Useful for children struggling with self esteem, or to lend some light entertainment during bleak days.
Holzwarth, Werner (1989) The Story of the Little Mole.London: David Bennet Books Lmt.
ISBN: 1 85602 101 7. Price £4.99. Age range: 4 to 11 years.
The plucky little hero sets out to find out who has left their sausage shaped business on his head. Read this entertaining story on a topic rarely spoken about with a child may be a step in building a trusting relationship.
Hughes, Shirley (1988) Out and about. London:Walker Books Ltd.
ISBN0 7445 1422 3. Price £4.99. Age range: 4 to 11 years.
Poems about romping through the changing seasons, experiencing the different elements and weather with detailed pictures of every day life. Changing seasons can be a useful metaphor for loss.
Phillips Mitchell, Rita (1998) The Gotcha Smile. London: Orchard Books.
ISBN 1 86039 064 1 (hdbk), ISBN 1 86039 951 7 (pbbk). Price £9.99 (hdbk). Age range: 5 to 8 years.
Transitions and change are challenging. Clarine looked forward to her first day at school and with help discovered that there was a special way to make friends. Useful for lonely children to see how they might change.
Information and Reference books
*Crossley, D. & Stokes, J (2001) Beyond the rough rock: supporting a child who has been bereaved through suicide. Gloucester: Winston’s Wish.
ISBN: 0 9539123 3 7. Price £4.50. Age
*Stokes, J. & Crossley, D. (2005) A child’s grief: supporting a child when someone in the family has died. Cheltenham: Winston’s Wish.
ISBN: 0 9539123 6 1. Price £5.99. Age range: adults supporting children
*Stokes, J. & Crossley, D. (2001) As big as it gets: supporting a child when someone in their family is seriously ill. Gloucester: Winston’s Wish.
ISBN: 0 9539123 2 9. Price £4.50.
* From Winston’s Wish: A series of booklets each giving helpful suggestions about the sorts of things parents might say to children at various times and practical activities. Illustrated with photos, children’s drawings and quotes.
Keene, M. (1997) Examining Four Religions. London: Collins Educational.
ISBN 0 00 322135. Price £13.99.
A clearly presented, easy to dip into text or reference book about Christianity, Hinduism, Islam and Judaism with information on worship, celebrations, holy books, life cycles, worship and beliefs.
Matlings, S.M. (ed.) (2000) The perfect stranger’s guide to funerals and grieving practices. Woodstock, Vermont: SkyLight Paths Publishing.
A clearly and concisely written handbook on how to respond appropriately when someone dies what ever their faith or denomination. An American book but still with much relevant and applicable information.
Meryl, J. (1998) Faith facts. Birmingham: The Festival Shop Ltd.
ISBN 0 9535269 0 9. Price £5.95
A guide to six of the major faith communities’ customs on such topics as: birth, names, diet, language, dress, visits, marriage and funerals (including what to wear).
Ross, M. (2004) Rites of passage: funerals. Oxford: Heinemann Library.
ISBN978 0 431 17712 0. Price: £6.99
Looks at the different funeral traditions of different faiths; includes case studies, information and a glossary and index. Photographs illustrate the text. An educational resource for pupils and quick reference for adults.
Games and other resources
Jenga: players remove a wooden block one at a time from the tower of blocks.
Players: one or more. Age: 5 and up. Playing time: 10-15 minutes
Skills require: manual dexterity, a steady hand. Turn taking.
The collapsing tower can be a metaphor of a grieving child, of their experience of coping and not coping: life is a bit wobbly and suddenly it collapses.
All about me by Barnardos: Brightly coloured board game with jungle motif. Question cards help players take turns to talk about themselves. Facilitator can select appropriate cards from the pack to target individual children.
Players: two or more. Age: 5 and up. Playing time: 30min+ depending on discussion and number of players
Useful tool for getting to know each other.
Upside Down Divorce Game (2003): Cartoon characters board game prompts players to pick up cards: question cards help player express feelings about divorce, idea cards help players become more self reliant, upside down cards help players to learn and practice new problem solving and coping skills related to divorce. Flip cards add some fun and create practical opportunities to overcome present problems.
Players: two or more. Age 8 to 11 years. Playing time: 60min, depending on discussion and number of players
Ungame: Brightly coloured board game with a circular path with no beginning and no end. Light-hearted and serious question cards help players to get to know each other. Blank cards available to add one’s own questions.
Players: two or more. Age 8+ years. Playing time: 60min, depending on discussion and number of players
Grief Game: A dull-coloured board game rich with cards to spur on players to discuss feelings, thoughts, wishes, dreams, memories and factual aspects about grief.
Players: two or more. Age: 6 to 16. Playing time: 60min, depending on discussion and number of players. Depending on players, it might be more appropriate to be played by only one adult and one child/young person
Emotions/feelings poster: photos of children expressing a variety of feelings.
Available from Festival Shop (tel 0121 444 0444; fax 0121 441 5404; email: click here
Bear Cards: Coloured drawn illustrations of bears depicting a range of emotions: happy, confident, shy, sad, energetic, tired, noisy, caring, grumpy, big, little and more.
Available from Incentive Plus Ltd (tel 0845 180 0140; fax 0845 180 0141; email:click here)
We welcome hearing about other bereavement & loss resources. If you know of something that you think should be on our list, click here to contact us.