Silence. Darkness.
A womAn sitting at a restaurant table. Sun shinES down on HER. SHE WEARS A STYLISH WORKOUT ENSEMBLE.
AFTER A MOMENT, A YOUNG WOMAN ENTERS AND SITS ACROSS FROM HER. THEY STARE AT EACH OTHER IN A LONG SILENCE.
FIRST WOMAN IS ABOUT TO SPEAK AS THE YOUNGER WOMAN JUMPS IN. FIRST WOMAN REMAINS SILENT.
YOUNGER WOMAN
...wow, you're even early. 'S impressive.
(BEAT) So, is this what you wanna do, sit here and stare at each other for however long? Is that it? Because I can, I can do that if you're--but it's not getting very much accomplished. You know? Not too much at all. (BEAT) You tell me. Lemme know if this is working for you and I'll--thanks for coming, though, I do appreciate that. I know it's middle of the day and you've got all sorts of...don't you have pilates in a little while or something like that? One of those cycling classes or whatever? Seems like it. I can't remember for sure, but it's one of those. Thursdays. During the afternoon. (BEAT) Isn't that weird, that I'd know that? Well, if anything, this is just gonna keep getting weirder, over the next little while, it is, so yeah...sorry about that. (BEAT) I was never gonna be the one to tell you all this stuff, to bring you up to speed or however you'd call it--that was supposed to be him. He was gonna do all that crap, so I'm just saying that this is, like... unexpected for both of us. You know? It is for me, too. (BEAT) I thought we'd be married by now--not you & me, obvious- ly, that would be crazy, but him and me, I'm saying, me and your husband (God, your head's probably just going, like, 'what the fuck?') but I'm serious here. I really did think we had a chance at one of those spring weddings. And you're in this place where you don't even know what the hell I'm talking about, right? That's true, isn't it? Yep. I can tell. (BEAT) God, guys can be such dicks sometimes... You know? Totally.
YOUNGER WOMAN TAKES A SIP OF HER ICED DRINK. FIRST WOMAN SITS AND WATCHES HER. SILENCE.
YOUNGER WOMAN (CONT'D)
I've been to your house, by the way. That is why I know about your classes and all--I've read through the little calendar on your desk there. The floral one, you got from the Boston Museum thingie--not the actual museum but the shop they have over in the airport. He got it for you, didn't he? That's what he told me. That is was a little gift. For you. And he got me some earrings there, from that same place... These, in fact. (SHE POINTS TO HER EARS) Isn't that--that's a bit odd, huh? That'd I'd be wearing them today, when we meet for the first time...it is to me, anyway. Strange. (PLAYS WITH THEM FOR A BIT) Any-how, yes, I've been to your place. I've slept in your bed, if you really wanna know. Because I would. I mean, if I heard that much, that somebody had been to my--then yeah, I'd wanna know the whole damn thing. Right? Maybe that's just me, but I'm completely that way. The need-to-know type. And I've imagined you, that face of yours, so many times--I've always stopped myself from looking at your pictures but I've imagined every inch of you... (BEAT) But hey, let's just cut to the, whatever, chase, ok, and get to, umm--your husband sent me a text today, this morning, on his way to work. (GETS OUT PHONE) See? (READING) "CANNOT WAIT TO SEE YOUR HOT PILATES ASS TONIGHT, BABY. LUV U." (BACK TO THE WOMAN) Yep, I was right, it was pilates...wasn't it? And so that's how I knew. That's how I knew that text was for you and not me--it was for my boyfriend's wife, whom he, quote: fucking hates and can't wait until it's over or she's dead. He said that. Dead. And now...this. All about your 'hot pilates ass,' so obvious-ly, you know, I'm a bit confused. To say the least. So this is where I'd normally confront him and we'd fight and he'd say that you two are through and he's just living there to save money and the papers are just about to be signed and...." this is the way I live my life now...this is the kind of bullshit I hang my hopes on. The promises of your husband. And that's why, this time, I decided to call you, ask you down here for coffee--or ice tea, I guess, is that what you're--that's what I thought might work best. I took your number out of his phone months ago just for a day like this, and here I am using it. Because I am a young woman, yes, it's true, but my life is ticking away and, frankly, I'm starting to think that he might just be full of shit. So! I'm just gonna sit here now, because I can do this for hours, running off at the mouth--but I'm stopping now and I wanna hear what you think. (BEAT) I really am curious and you seem as 'in the know' as anybody could be--so, what's up with your fella there? Any chance the two of you are getting a divorce or is he just lead-ing me down the ol' garden path? I know he likes fucking me, I do know that much. And oral sex. You? Does he like to eat your pussy because I can hardly keep him off me down there. You'd think it was the fountain of youth! (LAUGHING) Is he like that with you? Sure sounds like it. We certainly know he likes that 'hot pilates ass' of yours, which, I've gotta say--and I don't feel like this is just me being catty or anything, but--I don't really see it. You seem kinda heavy in the ass, no offense. (BEAT) But hey, that's really not my--it's your turn now. I'm ready to shut up and hear your side of things... promise. Seriously, this is me going...
YOUNGER WOMAN DOES A "ZIPPER" THING WITH HER MOUTH. LOCKS IT AND PRETENDS TO TOSS AWAY "THE KEY." SHE STARES OVER AT THE OLDER WOMAN, WHO KEEPS WATCHING HER.
YOUNGER WOMAN (CONT'D)
Go on, I can take it. I'd really like to know what's going on. From your point of view. Please tell me. Go-on. I dare you. I do. I dare you. (BEAT) I really do...
YOUNG WOMAN SMILES AND SITS BACK IN HER CHAIR. SHE TAKES A SIP OF HER DRINK.
FIRST WOMAN LOOKS AROUND, SEARCHING THE RESTAURANT WITH HER EYES. SHE TRIES TO SPEAK SEVERAL TIMES BUT NOTHING COMES OUT.
YOUNGER WOMAN SMILES. EYES LIGHT UP BUT THEY JUST MIGHT BE DEAD INSIDE.
AFTER ANOTHER MOMENT, THE FIRST WOMAN FINALLY SPEAKS.
WOMAN
...I'm not actually married, so...
JUST THEN, ANOTHER WOMAN ENTERS THE RESTAURANT. LOOKING VERY HESITANT. GOES AND SITS IN A CORNER. CHECKING HER WATCH. SHE TOO IS WEARING WORKOUT CLOTHES.
YOUNG WOMAN SUDDENLY REALIZES HER MISTAKE. SHE GOES LIMP AND TURNS BACK TO THE FIRST WOMAN WITH A SHIT-EATING GRIN ON HER FACE.
YOUNGER WOMAN
...oh fuck. That's--I'm sorry. Shit... that's my bad. Seriously. I hope that I didn't--you have a nice day, ok? Really.
SHE GETS UP AND WALKS OVER TO THE NEW WOMAN. SITS. STARES AT HER. SILENCE AS THE TWO WOMEN SIZE EACH OTHER UP.
YoUNGER WOMAN (CONT'D)
...so.
THE SUN BEATS DOWN ON THE LITTLE TABLES AND CHAIRS FROM ABOVE.
SILENCE. DARKNESS.