Crucial Conversations
ERVP, Becky Swails, Independent Consultant
Arbonne International
Crucial conversations are on-going in your business. The reason they are crucial is because they can cause a turning point with the people that you work with. I hope that each one of you will be able to take this information and be able to build stronger teams and have better communication. The good thing is that these principles can be applied across the board in your life.
· Have you ever asked yourself the question, “Who is REALLY on my team?”
· Have you ever wondered why your team members don’t call you when you tell them that you are available?
· Have you talked with people and they say they want to do this and then don’t get into activity?
· Have you sponsored people and then they “fizzle out” and you don’t know why or what happened?
· Are you having meetings and no one is showing up?
· Are you holding conference calls and no one is attending?
If you answered YES! to any of these questions, then there is a CRUCIAL CONVERSATION that you have NOT had with your business builders. And I have the answer for you!
I learned this conversation pretty late in building my business and IF I could start all over again, then I would have this conversation with EVERYONE that I sponsored in the business and that told me that they wanted to do this.
The purpose of this conversation is to communicate what successful people are doing and what is necessary for their success. And also to get their commitment of what they commit to do for the success of their business.
Remember, our intention as a sponsor is to help each one of our team members be successful. We don’t want them to waste their time with activity that won’t produce results and we want them to know what activity and commitments are NECESSARY for the success of their business. We HAVE to be HONEST with them and STRAIGHTFOWARD.
You need to posture yourself with your team FROM THE BEGINNING.
· If you want your team to NOT take you seriously, then be non-chalant. Don’t have this conversation. You will be asking the questions at the top of this email VERY QUICKLY about your team.
· If you want your team to take you seriously, then you need to treat your business like a million dollar business. You may not be getting the checks of a million dollar business, but you will be! Would you hand a million dollars over to someone if they are not ready to handle a million dollar business? NO! Ask yourself: DO PEOPLE TAKE YOU SERIOUSLY?
Here is how the conversation goes:
When somebody tells me, “Becky, I want to do this. I want to go all the way to the TOP in Arbonne.” Then I say, “GREAT! I’m excited for you and know that you can do it! I do want to communicate to you what I “require” of my team. And I use the word “require” only because this will help you be successful. But it doesn’t mean that I’m going to come chase you down and bother you if you don’t meet it because I don’t have time to do that. J These “requirements” are: (for local people): to show up to 1 Team Meeting a month, 2 Opportunity Meetings a month and any of the conference calls that we put together as a team. (for out of town people) to get plugged in to all the conference calls that we have as a team, to attend and complete at least 1 Arbonne University modules each week, and to connect with your sponsor for 30 minutes one time each week.”
Then I ask them this question: “Will you commit to doing this for the success of your business?” And I wait in SILENCE while they answer.
When they say: YES! I say: GREAT! And then tell them, ”Now remember, this is for the success of your biz, and if anything EVER changes, that is ok. Just communicate it to me and I’ll adjust my expectations and then I’ll meet you where you are at. This allows me to know where to spend my time.”
If they say: “I’m not sure what I can do.” Then I communicate to them it is only for their success and these are important events to help their business grow. It is their decision. And then I help them work out a plan of activity for events that they can commit to in order to help them succeed. At least we both know what to expect. (AND I also say what I said above about if anything ever changes to just let me know and I’ll adjust my expectations.)
So, you ask: “Who do I have this conversation with? What if they are a good friend of mine?
I don’t want to come across as being pushy.”
You cannot be a friend and a coach at the same time. You will need to put on your “Manager Hat” in your business. If you want your team to be successful, then you have got to be direct and honest with them about what it will take to be successful EVEN if they are your friend first! Many times we stray from the system because “oh, they are my friend and I want to do it differently with them because I understand how they will get this information.” Expect that they will do the SAME thing with their business because you are TRAINING them from the FIRST MOMENT you introduce Arbonne to them. STICK TO THE SYSTEM NO MATTER WHAT. It works! Don’t make exceptions. Posture yourself and take your business seriously.
So now, I’m sure you get it… and you might be thinking, “But what about the people that are already on my team? How do I have that conversation with them? What if someone decides to quit their business after I have that crucial conversation with them?”
GREAT! Better to quit now then to quit later. If they are going to quit over a conversation that defines expectations between you and your team and describes behavior that will help them succeed, then they were going to quit anyway.
When I first grabbed hold of this understanding, I was at Candice’s Nation Celebration. I heard her team making comments like, “Oh yeah, we know that we need to show up to events to get the help that we need to succeed.” I started asking questions… I wanted to understand this. Candice talked to me about posturing yourself, communicating expectations and getting their commitment so that you knew what was expected. It was AWESOME!
But then… I thought – WHAT IF I LOSE MY TEAM? Because it felt like I was just throwing my whole team away. But I trusted what I was seeing happen with Candice’s team (and I was coachable). They were SERIOUS and COMMITTED. I wanted that for our team too because I SAW the success that they are having. And that is my heart’s desire for YOU! To see you succeed! To look in your bank account and see a huge check. To drive that Benz and have your REALITY become what your current DREAMS are! We are in the business of changing lives and I know that this will help someone change their life.
I encourage you – take this information – apply it to your team – help them KNOW what it takes to succeed. You WILL create a team of STRONG COMMITTED individuals and if there is EVER a change in what they want to do, you won’t wonder… because you have ALREADY set up the lines of communication to talk with them about it and adjust your expectations of what they want to do with their biz.
After you have this conversation and you notice that your team member is not calling you or showing up at the events, then it is time for a check up. You now have a POINT IN TIME where you were given the commitment and expectation of what this person’s efforts would be. SO, you can “check in” to see if anything has changed. Remember, it is ok if something has changed, you are just asking so that you can adjust your expectations.
The conversation might go something like this:
“Hi Mary! I’ve been thinking about you a lot lately and I wanted to touch base with you to see how you are doing. I noticed that you haven’t been on the conference calls or at the events and I remember that you had committed to do that for the success of your business. So, I’m just checking in with you to see if something has changed for you. If so, that is ok! I would love to know so that I can adjust my expectations and know how to support you. Has anything changed for you?” Then just listen and support them. If an adjustment needs to be made, then you can agree to a new commitment at that time.
Go after this – it will make a huge difference in your business. Do not be afraid of running someone off. As their sponsor, you have a responsibility to educate them about what it takes to be successful. Help support your team and help them know that you are there to help them succeed. This will help you not only in your business, but also your life. When you communicate and agree upon expectations, then you know the framework in which to work and ANYTIME you need to renegotiate that framework, you can!
I believe in you – you can do this! Please talk to your upline if you have ANY questions about this information. If you have NOT committed to your plan of action with your sponsor then take OWNERSHIP and INITIATIVE and have this conversation with them. It will be HUGE for your business’ success.
Love you!
2