Writing Your Life: a journey of discovery
Patti Miller Allen & Unwin 2001, pgs 78 -81
Chapter Six
Workshop 3
Memory as poet
As well as communicating in symbols, memory is also stored in a poetic way; connections are made through imaginative association rather than logic. Memories are not simply stuffed in like rubbish, but neither are they ordered under logical topic headings like School days, Parents, Friends. Many people are disappointed that the stories of their life become flat and dull when written down under such headings. This flattening happens because they are accessing the logical, orderly part of the mind, the left brain if you like, rather than the imaginative, poetic right side of memory.
Your memory is a poet; it has stored experiences in imaginative patterns where the sound of marching music will lead you to the school verandah and the teacher leaning over you smelling of ink and the boy pulling a face in the next seat who later died in an accident. Go into life writing via this door of memory, rather than the door of topics, and you are entering into the imaginative, creative part of yoru mind. You are much more likely to write with vividness and clarity.
How to remember
So how do you open this `gate' in the mind? The answer lies in the way in which memories are stored. We all know that certain sensations, especially smells, will bring back events as if we were there. This means that sensory experience is stored `alongside' our impressions of events¿"¿the two are associated. All memories, in fact, are stored in association with other memories. So it is that one memory can trigger another¿"¿especially, I have found, if you write it down. The very act of writing seems to unsettle the apparently silent spaces around the memory and nudge other memories out into the light. Some suggestions for retrieving memories are:
· Listen to the music of the era you want to recall and let it `take you away'.
· Gaze intently at photographs taking in all the details; try photographs of places as well as people from your past.
· Take a trip back to where you used to live; if you are lucky you may even be able to go inside.
· Take a trip to your old school or workplace; look at the physical details with care because they will jog memories of how you felt and what you thought.
· Re-read books you read in the past; books from childhood are especially powerful in their associations.
· Go to the library and read old newspapers; select both local and national papers and remember to look at the advertisements as well.
· Talk with family members and old friends; they can often remember fragments that will jog your memory.
· Touch old dresses or favourite ornaments¿"¿it's amazing what our finger-tips, indeed, all our senses can remember.
· Smell fragrances, perfumes, flowers; any smells which you associate with particular times in your life.
There are some memories that we would rather not retrieve. They may be too painful or too hurtful to others or simply too embarrassing to recall. You may decide you do not want to write about them. This is always your decision. If you want to let memories lie undisturbed, you are free to do so. Still, it is true that facing memories again can lessen their power to disturb.
A number of workshop students have written about distressing memories¿"¿of childhood abuse, adoption, the death of a parent, parental divorce¿"¿which they had previously left unexamined. All but one have said that writing down those memories gave them a sense of release. The one who didn't said the memories of violence against her mother were still too disturbing and she decided not to continue her writing. (She did, however, keep coming to class.) It was her decision and it is certainly yours if you wish to let some memories lie. You alone will know if you are ready to face the emotions they may stir up.
Memories can be emotional. They can also be sensual or symbolic. Sometimes it is the feeling of joy or fear we remember, sometimes the smell or sound, sometimes a clear image. We may remember a whole sequence of events, or just a tantalising fragment. Exploring and writing down your memories can be one of the most exciting journeys of your life.