Child Bereavement UK
Working with bereaved children and young people 2016/2017
Group Flipcharts
UNIT 1
OUR GROUP
Hopes for the course
New activities
Deeper grasp of theory
Self-reflection
Different ways of thinking
Develop creativity
Learning bout different types of bereavement
Learning from breadth of experience in group
Support
More confidence
Honesty
All share
Concerns
Anxieties over I.T. and other skills
Time management
Adapting to academia
Opportunity for case study
Travelling
Staying away from home
Lots of sitting – bad back
Staying in comfort zone
How we will work together
Participation
To be heard without interruption
Confidentiality
Respect/kindness
Non-judgemental
Honesty
Supportive
Homework
Sharing resources
Humour
Safety
Challenge with support
BUDDIES/PEER SUPPORTERS
Mary and Angela
Jane and Ceinwen
Lisa and Cath
Clare, Shelley and Alison
HOME GROUPS
MARYJANE
LISA
CLARE / ANGELA
CEINWEN
CATH
SHELLEY
ALISON
FEEDBACK
What is feedback?
Criticism?
Fact or opinion?
Evaluation of you; your practice; your skills
Constructive/helpful
ENDINGS
What makes for a good ending?
Planning
Control
Preparation
Recognition it is a process, not an event
Clear communication
Partnership
Calmness
Choices at end
Achievement
Expected – no shocks
Expectations shared
Managed
Acknowledged
Recognition that there may be multiple endings
What’s important in ending with children? (own examples of how work has ended)
A treat
Memento
Opportunity to reflect on work done/original hopes and fears/achievement
Presentation/affirmation
Sharing their wisdom
Validation
DEVELOPMENT
Development is an evolutionary process, an unfolding – not only for the physical child, but of the child emotionally and cognitively
Silverman
What are the key requirements for healthy development into ‘well adjusted’ human beings?
Love/affection
Stability
Boundaries
Security
Respect
Trust
Honesty
Emotional needs met
Physical needs met
Psychological needs met
Social needs met
(adequate finances for these needs)
Spiritual needs met
Cultural needs met
Religions needs met (as child evolves)
Maslow’s Hierarchy of needs (Maslow, A. H. (1943). A theory of human motivation. Psychological review,50(4), 370.)
- Food/shelter
- Safety/security
- Warmth/love
- Self-actualisation
- Success
- Achievement
- Valued
- Fulfilled
- Content
(Lower needs must be satisfied for self-actualisation to be possible)
DEVELOPMENT
What can impair a child’s development?
Illness – own or family members
Brain damage
Family dynamics – divorce, instability
Cultural and spiritual dynamics/beliefs
Abuse – sexual, emotional, physical
Neglect – lack of food
Attachment issues – lack of love, emotional nourishment
Parental mental health
Sibling dynamic
Trauma – death, loss
Lack of stimulation and experiences
Over-protection/parental anxiety
Parental role models re behaviour/attitudes
THEORIES/MODELS OF GRIEF
Our knowledge:
William Worden’s tasks of mourning
Elizabeth Kubler Ross – stages of grief
Colin Murray Parkes – phases of grief
Stroebe and Schut – dual process model
Lois Tonkin – growing around grief (circles model/fried egg model)
Klass, Silverman and Nickman – continuing bonds
Bowlby – attachment
Richard Wilson – whirlpool of grief
Freud – detaching from deceased
Tony Walters/ Dennis Klass – narrative/biographical theories of grief
Robert Neimeyer – grief as a meaning-making process
Therese Rando – 6 R’s model (recognise, react, recollect, relinquish, readjust, reinvest)
OUR EXPERIENCES OF LOSS
Feelings and needs in an experience of loss
I felt…. / I needed….Guilt / Understanding
Shock / Time
Confusion / Understanding
Relief / Support
Shock / Time
Sadness / Closure
Sadness / Sort out practical aspects
Sadness / Closure
Sadness / Comfort
Powerless / Time
Confusion / Understanding