Why ‘Modern’ Feminism Confuses me
clearhaven / March 29, 2014
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The first time I came across the word ‘Feminism’ was in my first year(four years ago) at the university, in my writing class. It was an old article written about the role of women in the movie industry in the 90s. Based on the article’s portrayalof Feminism, it came off as women having the right to live up to their full potential and at the same time, still possessing self-restraint. I realized then I already stood for and was practicing some of the things self-proclaimed feminists were practicing(fighting against the unfair lack of privileges and exploitation women in the society) – and I wasn’t even calling myself a feminist then.
I still am not. I mean, I still don’t call myself one.
I believe in gender equality for all genders although I am more inclined towards the female gender not because I am female, but because the society beliefs and laws that have been imbibed for so long have been and still are unfair to my sex. Regarding this issue, progressionvaries significantly amongst women from different societies which therefore impliesthere is still plenty room for improvement. As a result, it would have been so easy to don the ‘Feminist’ cloak just because my beliefs tally closely with the higher idealsof feminism. Nevertheless I am wary of doing just that and here are my reasons.
1) Too many people have their own interpretation of what feminism is: According to ora-Google, this is the definition of feminism:
What Wikipedia said:
A collection of movements and ideologies aimed at defining, establishing, and defending equal political, economic, and social rights for women – Wikipedia(Feminism)
more
I have seen other definitions of Feminism especially on the internet, and some of them are so unrelated you’d think they were defining different terms. Some say its a term a bunch of angry women came up with to overpower men. Some say it’s specifically regarding female equality welfare in the society, just like the ora-Google and Wikipedia defined, others say it involves both genders. Some say only women can be feminists. Others say even men can be feminists. it goes on and on. There is so much drama and misinformation surrounding the term that there is little wonder it’s ideals are often misunderstood because there doesn’t seem to be a universal definition accepted by all.
2) Too many women advocate it differently:
Apparently there is real and fake feminism?
I remember seeing an article that was about Feminist activists going bare chested in the name of equal rights. I have also heard of women protesting to have the right to do what men do such as being promiscuous and not getting tongue-slayed by the society, and having the right to have multiple partners. Meanwhile, other Feminists protest about different things such as female children having the right to education, women having to take more political positions, women having the chance to try atjobs that are believed to be better suited for men. In essence, you find thatthere are indeed different shades of Feminism and while sometimes they intersect, other times they stand apart. Hence, you find that although these women are allaiming for the same thing, they may not necessarily agree with each other on how they ought to go about it.
3)Too many weird opinions about feminine empowerment: These days, and it has been happening alot, I get confused by women/girls tagging the heavy sexualization and glamorization of female musicians in today’s music(especially pop) industry as feminine empowerment . When you have a song saying ‘I want to be the kind of girl you like‘, and then the same musician of the song steps out and says that was a feminist song, it sure as hell gets one mind-boggled. I got the idea that Feminism(now this brings up the previous problems) required women to focus/worry less about their image, their ‘wiles’ , their acquisition of things that made them rely wholly on their gender. Ergo I thought it was more about a woman stepping out of the “I can do it as awoman”, into “I can do it despite being a woman” – forget about my anatomy, my natural wiles and focus on my intelligence and my ability to do great things too. I understand these songs have great videos and themes but I just don’t get the ‘feminism’ vibe that they either ‘claim’ to have or their fans ‘impose’ on them.
4)The ‘do as thou wilt with your body’ clause: I get it – everyone has the right to do whatever they want to with their body but you see that clause right there, it’s very misleading. I say this because it is open-ended and as such, leaves room for some women to misinterpret however they like, whenever they like. The thing is this: we women are still heavily objectified in the society. We are mere objects to drive an agenda be it in advertisements, movies or music videos. We are always needed for our parts; probably a hand, a butt cheek, a thigh, one eye(in the case where the two are not needed). This has gone on for so long that it has slipped into normalcy, and with the way things are going, I honestly do not think things are going to get better. So you see why that clause is deceptive, because some ignorant women would read it as ‘you have the right to objectify yourself. If you love it, go do it!’. This clause is the very same reason why such women cannot be told/advised they are wrong, because they feel they have every right to do these things.
Well technically they do, but still…it sort of defeats the purpose of Feminism don’t you think? What really is Feminism without self-respect? Or has it been remolded to something entirely different yet still bears the same name?
Then there’s the fact where some women/girls are using the term because the movement has become very popular and the bandwagon seems to offer free seats to anyone including those whoreally haven’t grasped the concept. In the end, some of these women end up turning the word ‘Feminist’ to a mere moniker that does not have much meaning and depth.
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I understand society has been mean(an understatement!) to us women. Boys/men are unconsciously taught that they rights over women which some interpret as mistreating a woman becausethey can,or rather because they should. We women have fought and are still fighting such revolting beliefs – andit is one hell of an arduous fight.
I just had to insert this here
I say it is arduousbecause they(some of these men who harbor such beliefs) believe we often send mixed signals: look – but do not touch, admire – but do not desire, approach – but only if he‘acts’ like a gentleman(even if he’sreally a wolf in sheepskin). That we expect them not to ogle us when we dress out of turn inpublic yet hope they notice us when we do since that is the point for dressing that way. These.., and then some other archaic and insipid reasons they have are why I say so.
Nevertheless…
Wedon’t leave the door unlocked just because no one has the right to walk in. Do we?
The basis of all this is that Feminism was intended to dispel such notions about women, and in someway I believe to protect us from the subset of men that cannot be reasoned with. However, the way some women practice Feminism of today only seems to aggravate the situation and strengthen the resolve of those kind of men regarding their treatment of us. It has not only aggravated the rate at which we women are treated as objects, but has increased the rate at which some of us want to be objectified because some of us cannot seem to find discernmentbetween unabashed expression of freedom, and self-restraint.
We choose what we wish to see and believe, and just because some things seem empowering to some females and ‘significant others’ are in agreement, does not make them so. I say this because what passes off as feminism often fails to support women in the ways they need it to when facing the challenges of womanhood in the 21st century[1].
In the end, what matters is not whether one does/does not call him/herself as Feminist. Rather, more emphasis should be placed how these people go to advocatetrue feminine empowerment that encompasses all women.
Like someone said, there are and will continue to be numerous definitions of Feminism just as there are different types of women in the world, who come from different backgrounds and have different beliefs, and different experiences. Hence, more emphasis should be placed on actions and intentions and not just on the title.
“The idea that we’re all just a bunch of well-meaning schlumps, trying to get along, is the basic alpha and omega of my world view. I’m neither ‘pro-women’ nor ‘anti-men.’ I’m just ‘thumbs up for the six billion.’”
- Caitlin Moran