Tickling the Monster: Jealousy-induction in Relationships

- 2 types of jealousy-induction goals:

  • relational rewards

- improve relationship

- help boost self-esteem

- increase relational rewards

  • relational revenge

- punish partner

- need for revenge

- desire to control partner

- 3 types of jealousy-induction tactics:

  • relational distancing
  • flirtation façade
  • relational alternatives

- 3 types of partner-response to jealousy:

  • aggressive
  • withdrawal
  • relational compensation

*both relational compensation and withdrawal lead to relational improvement*

- People sometimes intentionally attempt to make their partners jealous

- What is jealousy?

  • a complex of thoughts, emotions and actions that follows loss or threat to self-esteem and/or the existence or quality of the romantic relationship

- What is romantic jealousy?

  • a set of thoughts emotions and responses following perceived threat to a romantic relationship by a rival

-Jealousy always results from predispositions and a triggering event

-Jealousy complex:

  • comprised of anger, fear and sadness
  • associated with loss of affection, rejection, suspicion, insecurity and anxiety

- Jealousy is more prevalent in couples in love due to their emotional dependence

- Jealousy is motivated by certain strategic goals; goals followed by tactics to elicit certain jealous responses

goals:

  • to hurt their partner or cause emotional distress
  • to gain partner’s attention
  • to increase partners’ commitment
  • mate-retention strategy
  • to test the relationship
  • to boost self esteem and confidence

tactics:

  • talking of past/current relationships
  • flirting
  • dating or sexual contact with another
  • lying about the existence of a rival
  • sexually/emotionally spending less time

responses:

  • negative affect expression (crying)
  • solution-oriented communication
  • aggressive/negative communication
  • active distancing
  • avoidance or denial
  • violent threats or behavior
  • surveillance
  • manipulative attempts

- the more influential partner responses tend to be improvement and withdrawal

- the tactic and goal help moderate the response

- jealousy is influenced by biological sex, relational involvement, and commitment

- more females used withdrawal responses than males in other studies

(though equal responses were found in this study, and inconsistent elsewhere,

this cannot be proven)

- measures of study were newly developed and require further study in order to validate

information

- individual perceptions were taken opposed to hearing both sides of the story

DISCUSSION QUESTIONS:

1) Do you consider jealousy to be an adequate form of communication considering partners develop jealousy-inducting tactics to gain attention from each other?

2) In which ways can one increase their partner’s commitment using jealousy? And what may be some healthier alternatives?