THOUGHTS OF THE TWENTY-FIRST CENTURY
EDITION THREE April 2016
TABLE OF CONTENTS
When It Rains It Pours …………………..Phillip Wilsons
The Shoe …………………………………,,,,….Lyra Shorts
Oceanus……………………,,…….…SteveingtonCorreos
The Runner’s Shoe ……………,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,…………….Kay
A Little Insight on Volodymyr’s Loafers….Sarah Lopez
WHEN IT RAINS IT POURS by Phillip Wilsons
Why does everything bad keep happening to me? Why not Sam? Why not Joe? Why not my Boss? It’s not like I do anything bad! If I did I’d deserve this awful rain! But everything I do I do great! I pay my bills and my taxes, I go to work, I exercise, and I get a full ten hours of sleep! My job is HARD! I play video games all day, and only get three hundred grand a year! It’s hard to relax in my indoor hot tub knowing that I only make that small amount of money! Just yesterday my electricity-powered, all-terrain mustang got a scratch on its new paint job! Gah! Darn it! Darn this stupid rain for reminding me how bad I have it! I’m going to take a nap in my king-sized bed! Maybe when I wake up this horrible day will finally be over! GAH! I stubbed my toe!
This author’s interests are video games, traveling, space football volunteering, reading
THE SHOE by Lyra Shorts
Greetings, I am a shoe. A red Chuck Taylor Converse to be exact. I am what you call a ‘pessimist’. I hate other shoes and socks so much. The only thing that keeps me from getting worn out is the love of being worn. By Master-I-Do-Not-Know-The-Name-Of to be precise.
I am deeply sorry for being grumpy. Actually no, I am not deeply sorry and I regret nothing. I also hate everything and everyone with the exception of being worn by Master-I-Do-Not-Know-The-Name-Of. I hate sleeping while all you smelly feet and insolent socks and shoes love it. You see I have what you feet call insomnia and when I do sleep I am plagued by nightmares of being worn by smelly feet. I hate rainbows and adorable puppies. I hate mud and the rain. I loathe sandals but I want to be one so I don’t have to deal with bothersome socks. I also hate children. They are loud and annoying. Music is one of the banes of my existences since Master will dance causing me to do too much exercise. Television programs are obnoxious, movies give me migraines and books think they are intellectual.
If I were a human I would have the job of firing people. I would be perfect for the job because of my sole-less personality. Hahahahahahahahahahaha. I made a pun.
This author’s interests are the color turquoise, sleeping, eating, talking, running
OCEANUS by: SteveingtonCorreos
Chapter One
Tiger Lily
In 3058, Mia watched as the Hundred Isles of Oceanus got closer. Most of the colonists were in the Hundred Isles. The other group of island were the Iron Islands, from all the iron there. There were 7,501 colonists in the Hundred Isles. The Iron Islands had 2,014 colonists.
At John’s house, Mia looked at the size of it. John Lickleburg was the Governor of Oceanus. John pulled up a map of the Erdas Solar System.
“Nilo’s closet,” John started, “Stetriol has the most iron and steel. Amaya has the most land. Eura has huge forests. Oceanus has a lot of water. Zhong has the most colonists. Artica’s the coldest.” Zhong was close enough even being the sixth planet in the system it coldest temperature was only -69 degrees fahrenheit at the poles.
John showed Mia all the swimming techniques in the New Pacific Ocean. Later Mia found her sister she never knew she had.
“I don’t like the you can’t leave your homeworld until you’re 13 rule,” John said. On the way to Oceanus The United Republic of Earth (URE) changed the law that you can’t leave your homeworld till five to that you have to be thirteen to leave. Mia went back to Concorba, and John waited for eight years.
Tiger Lily Stacy Lickleburg was born on Oceanus. But Shela and BronLickleburg had to leave to Concorba. John would watch Tiger Lily. Mia was born at 1360 hours on Concorba. The “You can’t leave your birth planet till 13” separated the sisters for a long time.
Chapter Two
The Truth
At 1956 hours Tiger Lily woke up. She heard Mia wake up and knew it wasn’t a dream that did it. The noises that woke them were coming from the living room.
Tiger Lily and poked their heads out.
“I don’t care what you say,” the woman said, “She coming back with me.”
“What’s she doing here,” Mia said. Tiger Lily realized this was their mother.
“She likes it here, especially Lil,” John said using her nickname.
“Then they’re both coming,” Shela said.
“When are they leaving?” John asked, shocked.
“0650 hours, Concorba City time,” Shela said. That was 0305 hours in Ilis.
“They must never know the truth,” Shela said.
“Like you’re their mean aunt,” John said.
“What?” The twins said.
“Your mother was CorbaLickleburg, the seventeenth baby born on Concorba,” John said, “I met her at the Lemurian Bar.” It was home to the only extraterrestrials on Concorba, or at least Mia said.
“We married and had you ten years ago,” John looked sad, “She died giving birth to you.
“Shela took Mia when I came to get you. She left Tiger Lily behind,” John looked very sad, “She wanted a child.” He pointed a finger at Shela.
Two Nova Corp officers, police force of the Human Federation, came in. They arrested Shela under charges of abduction of a newborn. John was happy he had both of his daughters. Mia contacted Bron, her “father,” and said she was staying at Oceanus.
Lil was happy to have Mia go to Ilis Junior High. She was really smart. She was good at basketball. She led the Sharks to their first ever playoffs and a title. The Sharks were 19-2 in both regular and postseason. They beat the No. 1 Zhongese Junior High Warriors (20-1) 70-63 for the 3058 Erdas System Basketball Championship on Zhong. They lost the Crown Sector playoffs to the Concorba City Colonists, 80-62. It was still Lil’s best year ever.
This author’s interests are writing about the human race in space, history, math
The Runner’s Shoe by Kay
Nikey was a small shoe with a big dream. And that dream was to compete in the American Marathon. But his big brother Sketcher thought it would be impossible. Yet every day at 4:45 pm Nikey would go out and practice running as fast as he could. And every night he would watch his favorite show, which was the American Marathon. In fact that was all he thought about. But of course he couldn’t practice on his own,Nikey had a little help from the sock twins Perry and Hefty.
Every day he would practice with the sock twins at exactly 4:45 pm. One day, he was on the roof of the house he lived in. And he saw a bright star and wished he had a chance to run in the American Marathon. The next morning he was lying on the sidewalk, when he saw a man named Max, who was sitting the curb saying, “Come on Max you can still compete in the American Marathon.”
And that’s when everything changed for Nikey.
This author’s interests are history, dinosaurs, basketball
A Little Insight on Volodymyr’s Loafers (questions answered) by Sarah Lopez
~What are the shoes’ personalities? Do they get along with each other? How about with the socks?
~They are constantly being pointed out by their “friends” for being a different nationality. They cannot STAND each other, and the polka dotted socks constantly break up fights between the two.
~What do the shoes dream about at night? What would their nightmares be of?
~They dream of Ukraine finally being free. Nightmares consist of bald eagles, Putin, and sour borscht.
~What do your shoes aspire to be?
~They aspire to be co-leaders of a free Ukraine.
~What are a few of your shoes’ pet peeves?
~When people mistake them for Russians, when a bald eagle cry comes inconspicuously from nowhere, and silent lunch.
~What are your shoes’ favorite song, book, movie, and TV show?
~ “Silly Goose” -A traditional Ukrainian folk song.
~ “Sillier Goose” -Book based on the song.
~ “Silliest Goose” -Movie adapted from book.
~ “Goose” -TV show derived from movie.
~What qualifications do your shoes have, if applying for a job?
~Bilingual, in Ukrainian and stupid.
~Excellent taste in music, plays Ukrainian reject radio ads 24/7.
~Extra Fun Facts~
~Always carries a can of borscht in back pocket.
~The song “Silly Goose” is stuck in head 24/7.
~Can recite the Ukrainian Bill Of Rights from memory… There are none :(
I am VolodymyrTarasovichPloskanych and I APPROVE THIS MESSAGE.
From this author:
My shoe size is 9
I use Suave Professional Rosemary and Mint shampoo and conditioner
Homemade blueberry and banana muffins are yummy
Bow ties are cool.
They don’t understand.