Psychological Stresses and their Confrontation:
A Psychological researcher:
SamanSiwaily
Nowadays psychological stresses have occupied a clear place above the list of causes of bodily and psychological diseases. People of this era are not patient in terms of psychology generally, their sleeping is not perfect, their appetite for eating is not normal, social relations are about to die out, and there is complexity there among them, getting pleasure from the pleasures of the globe has decreased, youngsters and youth feel alienated much more; however human being in the different communities of mankind will face such kinds of stresses, we can say this period is the time of psychological stresses but the way of confrontation of these stresses is different from one person to an other and from one culture to another.
American surveys shed light on that, which %80 of American diseases their causes are those stresses and in the European countries especially in Scandinavian countries the rate of those who have psychological diseases, the rate of suicide is in a high level. Here we are not going to talk about the causes of this state and comparison between the east and west.
Today in Kurdistan the difficulty of life and being very busy with providing living and increasing of goods and technological products in the markets, and their bad use and getting benefit from them and their high prices, and lack of income, and baseless compete for collecting more interest, these are all in one aspect, the absence of social justice, corruption and deforming of the shape of common rituals and the rapidness of the changes in all levels, in the other side in average it makes a crowd and a stress for men that no one can escape from them without being suffering. A kind of suffering that in those sorts and grades will be different by the persons. The answer of men for these stresses and crowds is based on some factors, from them: the level of personal literacy, its social and economic sides, and the previous experiences of that person, sex, age, family education, belief, and instinct, etc.
The replies that each single may have it according to the differences which were pointed to: psychosomatic and psychological diseases, suicide, and family separation, and resorting to drug, fierce, crime and deviation, corruption and immigration, etc. though human being is the possessor of psychological balance and a suitable mechanism for being suffering equal to that the quantity of being suffering is going to decrease on him.
The sources of making stress:
1. Technology: The bad using of technological products has made problemsfor the majority of the children, youths, and youngsters, in terms of psychology, body, education, wasting time, addicting, being late at school and deviation in terms of behavior, etc.
2. Mobile: We all know the fact that mobile and the other products are made for serving human being and made facilities for us in life. But when the same product is used badly, not that is not useful but it is also harmful. Nowadays mobile is very common in a way that always that is with children too, or there are many people who have two or more than two. Unfortunately a vast amount of the youth and youngsters, use mobile in a bad way, even they get addicted to it without knowing its harms.
Now I would like to talk about some of the harms of mobile briefly, when using it badly will make us face some fearful situations:
1. Those people who use mobile very much or put their mobile close to their head while sleeping, they may get cancer in the brain cells, and their brain cells will get harmed, in this will be so especially among children and the youth.
2. Using mobile too much will be the cause of not letting one sleep easily, and it is clear that students need to have to for sleeping so as to give relief to their minds and have power of comprehension and concentration for studying, on the contrary if not sleeping well, it will make bodily and psychological problems for human being.
3.Using mobile too much will be the cause of lacking in concentration, and awareness, that is why we know that a huge part of the students nowadays have that sort of problem and say that they look at the teacher and the classroom white board in order to concentrate but we become absent minded, or they say when at home trying to study we soon become unaware of the book. In fact this causes so many problems in the field of study.
4. Those people who use mobile too much, they addict to it in away that they waste their times with it which does not give them any benefit except for harm.
5. Unfortunately, some times it is heard that because of photos and videos many social problems, and defaming occurred, which is generally has a bad reflection on the psychology of each single person.
6. Using mobile too much will make an economic stress on each person and the family, and some times the youth resort to steal some of the units of his siblings and parents without their agreement, and this will be regarded as a behavior deviation.
Dear Parents: For keeping away of yourselves and your children, we advice you:
1. Do not buy mobile for children.
2. If it is possible, do not buy the teenagers mobile, but if they were bought mobile, they must be advised to use it only for their job and necessary moments, not always be in their hands and wasting time with it, and not to make themselves busy with it, they must be taught that this mobile is only used for good communications.
3. It is not possible to put one's mobile in the sleeping room, or not to be put near one's head with the justification of alerting them for the next day ,when it is turned on, this is because the magnetic waves of mobile are very harmful for men especially for children and youngsters. Mobile must be switched off, and instead of it one must use a normal clock which works with battery.
4. It is better to answer mobile calls in the left ear rather than the right ear.
5. Those who wear eye glass and the framework of their glasses is mineral, it is better when they answer calls, to wear off their eye glasses because the mineral of the framework of the glass will absorb the magnetic rays of the mobile and then release it, and because eye is the closest from these rays it will cause short eye sight.
6. It is better not to pick up your calls unless after it rang three times, due to the numerous waves that go out from the mobile in the beginning of the ring.
7. If you do have not bought a mobile for your child, every now and then look at the private places of your child, because some times his / her friends will make him / her buy it, and deviate.
8. Try hard to strengthen the social relations among the family in order not to make your children alienated, and not to make them obliged to fill that gap via phone calls.
9. You must be aware of the money that you provide for your children in order not to make extravagancy in buying units for his/her mobile, because if he/ she get addicted to it then he/she will get it by any way.
Television:
Unfortunately in our society many families have more than one television at home, in a way even they have TVs for each room and in the corridors, too. That is why each member of the family will be busy with one channel, and as a result the relationship within the family will decrease, and the decrease of bringing in a psychological situation for children and the youngsters which is in the science of psychology called alienation. One of the psychological needs of this stage is to get passion and love and offer it. When parents make themselves busy with watching TV For along time especially in the night (especially watching the translated series that some family watch more than one in different channels and make themselves completely with watching TV) and do not give time to offer their love and passion to their children, at that time they will be obliged to seek for love and passion.
The writer ( Raswli Hamzatoz) says " those who will not get love at home, will seek for love on the street and outside the family".
That is why many times because of this state our youth will face problem in this field; they are exploited by the opposite sex. Finally, the children will be victims of carelessness of family and in terms of psychology and social the task of family will be hard. Unfortunately, part of the families buys special TV. For their children even some times with special satellite and put it in their special rooms. This behavior is completely against the educational principles because TV must not be in the room of children and teenagers, but they must watch it under the care of the family and specify time for them and not to give them freedom from watching any channel they want.
One of the new academic researches in this field is that research that a group of researchers and scholars that was implemented in Mississippi university of the United states of America., from it is clear that those children who are under three years who watch TV. For two hours they will face the problem of losing their concentration and this is %20 when reaching to the age of seven more than those children who do not watch it. These experts in their research discovered that for each one hour this rate will be %10 more and it means that those children who watch TV for five hours the rate will be %50 in comparison to those children who do not watch it. Therefore when children go to school they will face these problems in studying and then school and family will face this problem to solve it.
The other researchers proved that those children and teenagers who watch TV very much are more aggressive than their friends and the children's development of their thought will be delayed.
Moreover sitting and watching TV will be the cause for the children and youth's fatness because many times they eat so much food and do not move and spend the energy lesser than others. There is no doubt that we must not forget those magnetic waves of TV because they have negative affects on the health of men and it is necessary on parents to:
1. Try to have only one TV, and let it be in the living of the family, because in this way we can all sit together and this is better in terms of social, passionate and psychology and will offer much more patience and security to your children but not let them sit a lone in a room.
2. You must put private TV in the room of your daughter or son or your children but they must be under your care.
3. You as parents be a good pioneer for your children, if you did not have left any spare time because of watching TV, then the gap will be made for your children. They probably for fulfilling those social and passionate gaps (especially passion) resort to other things, or if not they are similar to you waste so much time on watching TV, and they will be late in studying and preparations for their studies.
4. When teenagers realize that their parents are much worried about a series in TV rather than them, a root of revolt will grow up within them, and they will not do what the parents want them to do, since they think that they are marginalized.
5. Do not make children in the early age of their childhood be busy with TV, but rather to make them busy with games and mixing with the other children and reading magazine of children, and you yourself be present for watching TV, talk with them and give them information about the visible subjects but do not leave them alone watching TV.
6. Specify time for your children to watch TV and do not let them to sit and watch TV for a long time according to what they like, try to have a system for studying, when they finished their duties, let them watch TV for a specific time. Play station:
It is one of those games which nowadays made children and youths get addicted because this very charming for their world, in a way that children or teenagers when spending several hours for them it is like one minute.
Look at the children and teenagers how they sit during the time of this game, they do not care whether it is healthy or not healthy, unfortunately many times it will have a bad result for the organs of body especially the backbone, and watching and playing games too much in the play station will have a bad effect on eyes, and it will make the eyes weak, too. It also makes children be introvert and not to mix with the other children, and separate them from their social environment, and more than these, is that the CDs which have many users are those which are about aggression, and they have bad effects for the behavior of children and teenagers. Unfortunately, several times one can see that the family encourage their children to sit and waste their time with these things, and addict them with the plea of saying in order not to go out and mix other children, and be patient at home or lest interrupt the parents in watching TV that they like, that is why the older members buy a small TV for the children and send them to a special room, the children or teenagers till they become tired play it there and then they sleep soon, and this is without the attention of family for this bad state. It is seen that children and the teenagers are busy with these kinds of games during the time of study, probably they study for one hour but four or five hours they will be busy with the games, and this very fearful in terms of education , psychology and social aspects.
Some times the youngsters spend a huge amount of money in the purpose of buying CDs for their Play Stations, and they become an economic stress for their families, but what is very strange and odd is that if the family will not be aware of the type of the CDs and their contents.
An expert made a research on the effect of aggressive films on the behavior of children, he prepared two group of children of the same age, each group were put in the same hall, and for each group there were some dolls, they showed an aggressive film for one group and a scientific film for the other group, after showing the movies and the researcher via secret camera in the two halls saw that the group which show the aggressive movies started hitting each other and the doll too, but the other group very patiently played with the each other and the things around them. From this the effect the aggressive films will be very clear on the behavior of children and youngsters, this is also has a bad effect on children and will make them lose their concentration on children and teenagers. Those children who waste much time with playing on play station will be fat because they do not move. Dear family it will not be better if you surrender to your children and teenagers that is willing to spend many hours with play station and spending their time and make them late from their studying, that is why it is necessary for the parents to behave in this way:
1. Specify time for your child, that not to be more than one hour especially if they are under six years.
2. Look after the CDs that your child or your teenager use them and try to provide scientific and useful films and try to make him far away from aggressive films, as much as you can.
3. The children and youngsters must be taught that after finishing the school duties they have the right to play games, not to neglect his duties for playing the games.
4. Encourage him for those plays which contain body movement and the social ones especially with his friends, since in one way he will learn the social disciplines and in the other way he will learn how to gain and spend and how to offer and respect the other people with him and moreover the potentials of children will grow in the plays which have movement and will be very beneficial for his muscles and the energy the children and teenagers possess will be spent.
5. It is possible in the process of debit and bonus getting benefit from this machine, for example when children or teenagers do some thing against the rules and disciplines, it is better to prevent him from this machine and on the contrary when doing some thing good letting them using it thirty minutes more, and clarifying it for him that it is because of that good behavior he is being offered with what you offer him.