Trainworld Tribune
“The Voice of The Island” MARCH 29, 1954 25¢ Daily, 75¢ Sunday
Ancient City Found in Frostbite Mountains!
Famed Local Archaeologist Finds Ancient City, Occupied by Penguins
Trainworld City; Story by Dustin Ink: Famed local archaeologist, Kyle Boyat – better known by his trade moniker, “Minnesota Stones” has discovered ancient ruins of a penguin city high in the Frostbite Mountains. Stones was actually looking at artifacts and relics of the abandoned mining encampment of Stannard Peak when he travelled further east of the mountain and came upon the find. “The warmer weather must have melted much of the snow that was hiding these ruins. I’m surprised that they haven’t been discovered earlier,” said Stones. The ruins appear to be those of an ancient city – complete with temple and igloo type dwellings that were built by the ancient ancestors of the modern day Great Frostbite Penguins – some of whom still dwell here. “I was “greeted” by several penguins while exploring the grounds. It’s quite apparent that some still live here, or at least return here,” said Stones.
(L) Photographer Roger Nesje and explorer Kyle Boyat encounter penguins among the ruins. ( R ) Penguins wander about the abandoned mining town of Stannard Peak
Stones was working alone, but when he came upon the discovery, he radioed to Trainworld City for freelance photographer Roger Nesje of Nesje Photography to helicopter into the site and photograph it. “I was very surprised when I got the call”, said Nesje. “I’m glad I went. It’s quite astonishing. The ruins seemed quite old, yet there were still penguins around the ruins.”
Stones believes the city was actually fairly large, with most of it still yet to be excavated. “I’ve encountered what appears to be several temples, some type of altar, dwellings and other structures. It’s fairly well laid out,” he said. He also added that although the penguins seemed friendly, they were also very protective, not allowing him or Nesje near certain structures. “We came close to the largest structure, the temple or oracle, and they wouldn’t let us near it. They stood in front of the steps and kept making some sort of “noot noot” noise. It’s apparent they still have some reverance for these structures,” Nesje added.
Dr. Boyat wouldn’t reveal the exact location of the site, in order to further document the site before looters or others decimate it, and to protect it’s “inhabitants”. “I’m pretty sure these particular penguins still live here, and are possibly the decendants of those who may have built these structures. I owe it to them to protect their city. They may be penguins, but it’s their town.”
“Minnesota Stones” was only able to make quick drawings of key structures and take notes, and Nesje took as many photographs as he had film before they took the helicopter out of the site due to an approaching snow storm. Stones said he would return at a later date to further document the site. “This site may hold some of the keys to evolution of the Great Frostbite Penguins, which today are as intelligent as humans. But these penguins at the site didn’t appear to posses those skills, so it’s an assumption that these breed of penguins are different than the Great Frostbite Penguins, although they look similar in appearance,” said Minnesota Stones.
Among the domestic Great Frostbite Penguins on the Island, the Praetor of the Republican Senate Chilly D. Pen Gwynn, has said that the find represents a great significance to the history of the penguins. “It helps us bridge a gap, and determine where we came from,” said the Praetor. “There are many of us who long have wondered just how we advanced to be able to talk, read and such. And the age old question, at least for us: how did a penguin species end up this far north? This discovery may begin to answer those questions,” Pen Gwynn said.
When European settlers first landed on the Island in 1809, they discovered large walking and talking bears, known as the Yddet, and large talking penguins, now known as the Great Frostbite Penguins. Both species have long puzzled researchers and despite efforts to try and discover their heritage, no one yet has been able to verify as to where they came from and how they got this far north from the natural habitat of penguins, the far southern hemisphere. Most of the penguins on the Island are nomadic, or roaming. To find an actual city, presumably built either by them or for them, is an amazing footnote in the chapter of these creatures.
(L) Ruins photographed by Roger Nesje of the settlement at the site. ( R ) Nesje and Boyat explore the ruins.
Minnesota Stones did however say that it is too early to speculate if the settlement was built by the penguins. “These are very large and heavy structures. It’s possible they were built by some native tribe of humans that had lived on the Island, or the Yddet race. I’m not saying that it’s impossible, but the average size of the Great Frostbite Penguin is about 4 feet tall. Some of these structures are huge and bulky to move. They’ve been put in place with precise calculations, and decorated ornately. Whether or not the penguins built it is one thing, but the biggest question I have is actually, who DID build this settlement, for what purpose, and why here?” said Stones.
With little time to explore the settlement, Minnesota Stones has said his work is cut out for him. “In my short time there, it proved to be a fascinating place. I could see artifacts protruding from the snow in some areas, and others that appeared to be hidden by it. There’s a lot of questions to be answered by this find and I look forward to returning to begin that process,” Stones said.
Dr. Kyle Boyat is the professor of Archaeology and History at Abnormal State University. He studied under famed archaeologist Dr. Henry Jones Jr at Marshall College in Bedford, Connecticut and participated on several digs and expeditions with him. It was Dr. Jones who gave him his nickname, “Minnesota Stones”, in reference to Boyats birthplace, Duluth, Minnesota in the United States.
If You Booked Us, You’re Pretty Much Screwed
Sports
NATIONAL HOCKEY TOURNAMENT RESULTS
Frostbite Falls, Boldon set to collide for Championship
The Penguindrome, Frostbite Falls; Story by Tim Cahr: Jimmy Gribbs saved his best shot for last, scoring an empty net goal from center ice with just over a minute left in regulation to seal the deal for the Frostbite Falls Penguins in yesterdays National Hockey Tournament semifinal. The junior forward intercepted a puck at the blue line after Fitzgerald Mariner pulled goaltender Jeff Sumner with 2:12 remaining for an extra attacker and Gribbs hit paydirt to give the Penguins a 5-3 win over the Mariners to advance to the National Title game against Boldon. Brian Buskalava, the Fallsnetminder, played a stellar game in nets and was tested often making amazing save after save. Fitzgerald Mariner’s Jackie Sinclair scored two goals 49 seconds apart in the second period to make it a 4-3 game after Paul Powel started a two goal scoring frenzy for the Falls in the first period with Frank Jensen adding another late in the period to make it a 3-1 game following a late goal by Mariner forward Jon McTell. Fitzgerald fought a good game, but the power of the Penguin first line of Jensen, Johnson and Powell was too much to overcome. Shots on goal were almost even with an advantage titling to Falls, 26-24. Mariner will take on the Mustangs of Maidaville Memorial tomorrow in the Third Place game.
Frostbite Falls: 5
Fitzgerald Mariner Memorial: 3
Frostbite Falls and Fitzgerald Mariner make a game of it in the National Tournament Semi Finals
In the other semifinal game that evening, it was the fifth ranked Bombers from Boldon to edge the Mustangs from Maidaville Memorial., 3-1. Both Kenny Gracco and Bill Berg scored two goals in the second period for Boldon to erase a 1-0 first period deficit by the Mustangs Michael Bae. It was as close as Maidaville got as Johnny O’ Connor put the finishing touches on at 7:44 of the third period to ice the cake for the Bombers who go on to face their Chippewa Range foe, Frostbite Falls for the Championship. Memorial will play for third place tomorrow against Fitzgerald Mariner Memorial, in a match that guarantees that one “Memorial” school will win.
Boldon: 3
Maidaville Memorial: 1
In the Consolation bracket, it’s been the tournament of upset for # 2 ranked Saint George Academy, as they lost 3-2 in overtime to Trainworld City Park. For the Dragons, it’s been the second gut wrenching overtime loss in two days – losing yesterday in the quarterfinals to Fitzgerald Mariner Memorial by the same score. “It’s been heartbreaking, no question about it. We came in here with high hopes of winning it all, and to be thrown out in the first round….it’s a tough pill to swallow right now,” said sophomore Joey Padden. Park scored first and fast, with Zach Jeckich scoring with 2:57 seconds into the first period, and Jeremiah Lucas following 22 seconds later making it a 2-0 game early on. Padden scored both goals for Saint George in the second period tieing the game, which is how it remained until overtime, when Pete Morrison scored the game winner at 5:23 of overtime to defeat the Dragons. The Trainworld City Park Wildcats, now 17-7, advance to meet Trainapolis Apollo, a 5-1 victor over the LaSalle School of Railton in the other Consolation semi-final. The Trojans scored three goals in the first period and never looked back. The Lions lone goal came on a power play in the third period by Ted Lonsdale, who put it past Apollo goaltender Paul “Pottsy” Pompansario at the 8:14 mark. The Dragons end their season 18-6.
Trainworld City Park and Saint George Academy tangle in the Consolation semifinals yesterday at the Penguindrome.