The Moral Right of the Author Has Been Fully Asserted

Such is the life

My son

Always

A bed of roses

All characters in the publication are fictitious and any resemblence to real parties, living or not is but purelu coincidental

The moral right of the author has been fully asserted

This noncommercial edition is released in cooperation with

Rainbow QueenNonprofit and may directly be order at:

Rainbow Queen is nonprofit humanitarian legal entity

where the revenues and contributions were to be sent

into help and assistance to the programs aiding most

sensitive categories of children, such as parentless

or the children from national minorities or from the

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to provide for their own requirements and needs.

duced, stored into a retrieval system, or transmitted

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recording or by no other means, without prior consent

by the author.

D. Duke

MOSQUITOSOLDIERS

American comedy

Play in 4 acts

CHARACTERS

In order of the stage appearance

ALEN JOKER BRENT, Major

KEVIN WEST, Colonel

Dr. GABRIEL SCHOFIELD, Colonel

ALISTAIR O’NEAL, Captain

ROBERTO MEDINA, lawyer

HELENA O’NEAL, Alistair’s mother

CHRISTIAN STANSKI, First Sergeant

Mr. PRIVATE X

PATRICK RHODES, General

HELEN BRENT, Alan’sdaughter

ROBERTA MEDINA, Roberto’s daughter

ACT 1 SCENE 1

(In Washington DC, on Wednesday, March 10, 2004Major

Alan Joker Brent at writing desk in his small 4th floor

office at the Defence Department’s InternationalLegal

Section appears quite absorbed by going through morning

newspaper. He is short and rather thin middle-aged man,

with huge glases over his face, dark hair and wearing at

least one size toolarge navy blue uniform)

COLONEL KEVIN WEST

(With his nose hardly appearing at doorway.He is tall

very handsome looking man in his late thirties with wide

smile on his smooth all sun-tanned face and well build

body inelegant tailor-like madeolivegreenuniform)

I knock… knock… knock at.My Major

Alan… Alan… Alan Joker Brent.

ALAN BRENT

(Leaps on his feet, overturning one chairdown, his

cap along with the newspapers fallsoff to floor. He

instinctively tries to stoopdown, then changes his

mind, clicks heels, holds his right handup in whatit

looked like a pretty clumsysalute, speaks in slightly

muttering fashion)

Yessir!In… in you get. My dearest

and only Colonel Kevin… Kevin West!

KEVINWEST

It’s almost a noon time yet, and so

I figure it might still not be very

late to engage into a petty chat.

(Picks the cap off the floor by tips of his fingers)

And I’d guessthat this little thing

actually belonged to you, didn't it?

ALAN BRENT

Indeed sir!That… that thing used to

belong to me since… since before the

the Great Flood sir.

Mosquito Soldiers ACT 1 – Scene 1

KEVIN WEST

(Thoughtfully)

It doesn't seem that old to me. And

you see, there’s really no point in

salutingany time we see each other.

After all, we’re all fellowlawyers

here, aren’t we?

ALAN BRENT

Yeah, lawyers… doctors… or cavalry

commanders… all the same. We still

do… do the professional soldiering

for… for our living.

KEVIN WEST

I liked the cavalry sequence though.

I guess that was where our good old

G.A. Custer used to be helluva good

at.

(Puts the nearest chair in upright position, sits down,

tiltsinto horse riding like position, rolls right hand

high up over his head, screeches in an undertone)

Gee up, my boys, gee ho… giddup… on.

(Abruptly cools down, whiffs his thick mustache)

It seemstoo hard to make thenoon

time battle cry. But ifustwo had

happened to be down at my place, I

would surely long asked our Ruthie,

Ruthie,Ruth! It’s due for the hot

coffee to cook!

ALAN BRENT

(Glancestowards door)

What about the machine made one? I

guess I… I better get some at once.

KEVINWEST

Oh no, no dopes today, please. Well,

I know I'm quite new in our Section

and stillI guessyou won’tmind us

arriving to a first nameterm, will

you? 6

Mosquito Soldiers ACT 1 – Scene 1

ALAN BRENT

Not if you said so,sir! Colonel Sir!

I mean Kevin West! I mean Kevin! And…

and good morning to… to you too sir.

KEVIN WEST

Good. Very good. So I guess we may

now focusto ourorders of the day

a bit more eagerly though. And the

orders of the day are…

(Lolls his feet up over the desk, puts one paper file

with sign CLASSIFIED right atop the desk)

Are right in here, you see.And by

the way, I do guess that you're in

whatever petty touchtothe actual

developments in Iraq, aren't you?

ALAN BRENT

(Raises his feet right next to Kevin’s)

I… I can think of nobody who dared

not… not to be. Since last year.

KEVIN WEST

(Drops his feet back to floor)

But still I do doubt that the place

called Ramadi might ring some bells

in your memory.

ALAN BRENT

(With his feet down)

No… I don’t think so. Not… really.

KEVIN WEST

No wonder though for it belongs to

small and not too charming slum by

hundred or moremiles fromBaghdad.

And now it got its own flag aboard

our war map, I’m afraid.

(Gets up to his feet,paces by a bit restlessly)

Mosquito Soldiers ACT 1 – Scene 1

KEVIN WEST

Barely a few months ago we set the

Al-Ihram detention center in there.

And now, now we seem as running to

the deep shit where… where Captain

Alistair O’Neal actually shot dead

one youngArab inmate.As Sergeant

Major Stanskiwas fortunate enough

to get away slightly hurt.

ALAN BRENT

(Swallows a gulp, looks down at Kevin’s shoes)

Ugh-huh, that’s what I’d call deep

shit too. But still… I wonder what…

what's that got to do with us and…

KEVIN WEST

(Pops in tune of El Condor Pasa)

And…YES IT DOES! IT SURELY DOES!

Oops!

ALAN BRENT

(Paper file falls off to floor, he rubs hisglasses,

kneels below the desk, goes through documents enclosed)

Well, it…it does sayjust as you

said it'll say. Signed and sealed

by General Pat Rhodes himself. I…

I do wonder though what…what was

it to make him engage to… to such…

such… I mean you know what I mean,

don't you?

KEVIN WEST

(Sits down, hits his feet up the desk, smiles widely)

Well, I'm not quite sure if to say

this or not. Just a few days ago I

met him in private, andby the way

he held his eyes I realized it had

to do with anything political, you

know.

Mosquito Soldiers ACT 1 – Scene 1

ALAN BRENT

(Coughs uneasily, thrusts his feet next to Kevin's)

Ugh-huh! And yet… yet, why… why us?

KEVIN WEST

(Shrugs)

He said he will trust our judgment

the very best and sohe expects us

to go through all facts once again.

And come overwith our opinion and

advise. If the matter is to remain

where it is right now, or the full

military investigations would have

to be called upon eventually.

ALAN BRENT

Oh no… no, don't you give me that…

that guilty look please. It makes

me feel like it… it was me you’ll

ask me to take on this yucky post.

KEVIN WEST, grinning

It is yucky no doubt.But still I

kind of hoped that you might give

me a hand in that one.

ALAN BRENT

But… but why me out of plenty of

fast horses in… in our stable? I

guess that a guy with bit higher

personal profilemight prove far…

far better for that job.

KEVIN WEST

(Lowering his feet down)

I’m the cavalry guy, remember, not

a painter to deal with profiles. I

did have to look at every track of

every single guy in ourdepartment

but… but only to find youmatching

the task 200%.

Mosquito Soldiers ACT 1 – Scene 1

ALAN BRENT

(With his feet down)

C’mon, I… I am the guy sitting in…

in same rank for 12 years now. It

looks as… as if my career kept on

flowing with no success nor taste,

for… for… forever long.

KEVIN WEST

To me ranks are not the key event

in the entire gallaxy. Personally,

I believe that our trade could be

separated into two main branches.

The second one was about mosquito

soldiers who always leave a stain

after every job they do engage to.

And as for you I found no shit or

a dash of an air even in 32 years

of the service.

ALAN BRENT

(Grinning)

I guess it… it’s a good news then.

KEVIN WEST

(Solemnly)

To me the best there is.

ALAN BRENT

And yet thought, in my years I saw

so… so many times to doubt that we

got sort of obsessed by our careers

andranks… careers and ranks alone.

KEVIN WEST

No, not all. To me there always is

an officer, a manthat comes first.

As at the end of all ends it’s him

that truly counts. Only him.

Mosquito Soldiers ACT 1 – Scene 1

ALAN BRENT

(Grinning from ear to ear)

Aye, aye sir. I recall that Officer

and the Gentleman movie so… so well.

It… it was with Richard Gere athis

best, wasn't it?

KEVIN WEST

(In half tone)

Idid prefer Julia Roberts though.

ALAN BRENT

And say that we… wedo agree here,

I wonder if I… I could still count

on youstanding by my side? No… no

matter what.

KEVINWEST

(Jumps upon his feet, shakes his head quite firmly)

Oh no, Major sir! I’m in charge for

the rosy side of that hill alone!

ALAN BRENT

(Holds his breath)

And… and what about the other one?

KEVINWEST

(Bursts laughing, gets down to his chair again)

It goes without saying that we'll

walk the very same rope here.

ALAN BRENT

(With relief)

Aye, aye sir that was all I needed

to squeeze out of you right now.

(Takes upon paper file, it slips off to floor again)

Wow… it appears that even the hot

potatoes need to… to… to be taken

by… byfirm embrace these days.

Mosquito Soldiers ACT 1 – Scene 1

KEVIN WEST

(Gets up, offers to shake, speaks in tune of El Condor)

YES IT DOES, IT SURELY DOES.

Good day my Major dear. That is

the top priority stuff and thus

do drop by anytime. Anytime you

feel like eventually.

END OF SCENE 1

ACT 1 SCENE 2

(In Washington DC, on Thursday, March 11, 2004 Alan

Brent in blue uniform awaits in reception room of the

Military Memorial Hospital,painted in dull white with

thick metal bars over huge windows, two chairs and one

table with jug and coupleof glasses atop it)

COLONEL Dr.GABRIEL SCHOFIELD

(Approaches from behind, he is of Alan’s height but a

bitchubby for his early sixties, wearing white upto

knees long cotton coat, white bow-tie, and all white

surgeonlike cap. Speaks in very low rustling tone)

Good afternoon to you, Major Brent.

ALAN BRENT

(Startles, almost falls offhis chair, smiles curtly)

Wow! You… you sureare Dr. Schofield,

Colonel Gabriel Schofield. I had not

even heard youcoming.

GABRIEL SCHOFIELD

You were not supposed to though. It

is the ghost waywetalk or walk in

our daily routines. For the sake of

our patients I’d claim. In any case

on behalf of the MMH I’m pleased to

have you here today Major Brent.

ALAN BRENT

(Whispering)

It… it’s so kind of you sir and I do

thank you for obliging me on such an

awfully short… short notice. And yet,

I don’t really recall if ever before

I came across the place as… as quiet

as this one.

GABRIELSCHOFIELD

Though it ought to be this way, you

know. Tobenefitof our patients of

course. But now since we arrived to

the subject I wonder if youthought

of engaging a therapist of your own.

I mean as yet. 13

Mosquito Soldiers ACT 1 – Scene 2

ALAN BRENT

(Shakes head)

But no… no!I never… ever though I

needed one in… in the first place.

GABRIEL SCHOFIELD

Thoughyou should, you know. And so

should everyone else I suppose.

ALAN BRENT

And you?You too?

GABRIEL SCHOFIELD

Whow! I’m on the course for nearly

30 years. You see, I got one small

mirror fixed up over my bed and so

that I can talk to my shrink twice

a day at least. Anyhow I do wonder

if you happened to be on religious

side for yourself?

ALAN BRENT

(Shrugs his shoulders, thinking for little while)

Well… I guess I could say so. But…

but observing no particular branch,

I am afraid.

GABRIEL SCHOFIELD

I hope you won’t ask me how, but I

do sensea bit of the Jewish roots

in your family tree.

ALAN BRENT

My old man was a Jew for sure.

GABRIEL SCHOFIELD

(Clicks his fingers)

Yes,yes! It was the nose that…

ALANBRENT

(Instinctively touches over the tip of his nose)

What nose? You mean my nose? What…

what’s wrong with it anyway? 14

Mosquito Soldiers ACT 1 – Scene 2

GABRIEL SCHOFIELD

(Shakes head)

Nothing wrong. It just looksJewish,

that’s all.

(Fills glasses from jug, drinksfrom his in big gulps)

You know, I use plain water as my

favorite therapy technique. Books

call for half a gallon a day, but

I’d go for at least twice as much.

It’s good for both, body and mind

to get a good swim sometimes. But

back to our Brent subject…

ALAN BRENT

You mean Brandt? David Brandt?

GABRIEL SCHOFIELD

(Claps his hands)

UghI see. Not a big deal though. I…

I personally knewbig bunch of guys

who went changing their names in an

aftermath of the last war.

ALENBRENT

(Hesitatesa bit, takes up a few gulps from his glass)

He did his part in late spring of

1948 after a long journey by slow

steam boat from Haifa toNew York.

GABRIEL SCHOFIELD

(Fills glasses, leans forward with palms between knees)

Alright. And yet, we got the Joker

parttodealwith.

ALAN BRENT

(Nodding)

Well… for that we must first go a

way backto… to winter of 1942 to

meet… meet 15 years old David on…

on his slow train trip to… to… to

Treblinka. 15

Mosquito Soldiers ACT 1 – Scene 2

GABRIELSCHOFIELD

(Chokes, water drops burst off his mouth, he takes a

paper tissue, dries up stains from Alan’s uniform)

It’s awful! I got no words. Awful!

ALAN BRENT

(Confused, takes one napkin as well, rubs water stains

off Gabriel’s coat)

And there he… he survived for over

3 years because of… of his ability,

or… or the God’s given gift to… to

entertain. To tell jokes, you know.

GABRIEL SCHOFIELD

(Bites his lips very hard, gets up, runs to onecorner,

throws water off his mouth to the buck, returns back to

table)

He? what? I… I don’t quite get it.

ALAN BRENT

He… he was singled out of the gas

chamber line by a Nazi… Nazi chap

who liked the joke he heard David

said to his inmate the day before.

GABRIEL SCHOFIELD

(Takes his cap off, slams it over his lap in huge rage)

Damn it!Bloody bastards, do mind

not my tongue though. And what’re

the jokes wetalk about here?

ALAN BRENT

(Sighs deeply)

Very funny I’dguess.Since not a

one… the single one was to… to be

repeatedtwice.

GABRIEL SCHOFIELD

(Whistles bythe teeth, puts the cap atop his forehead)

Mosquito Soldiers ACT 1 – Scene 2

GABRIEL SCHOFIELD

It means that in 3 years, or 1000

days he was supposed to memorize,

or innovate 10,000 jokes or more.

I guess that with such a sense of

humor he could make a naked stone

laughing to its tears.

ALAN BRENT

(Thoughtfully)

Though I… I recall him as of solemn

kind of a guy. Or perhaps he turned

to such after he… he met with Helen.

Helen Hartford.

GABRIEL SCHOFIELD

Where? Here in New York?

ALAN BRENT

On some Broadway show, sometime by…

by late fall of 1949. They’d never…

neverparted since.

GABRIEL SCHOFIELD

(Chears up a bit)

And so you were finally blessed by

beingborn as the child of love.

ALAN BRENT

(Hides his eyes aside)

I… I wish it took a bit… bit longer

though.

GABRIEL SCHOFIELD

Why? Why’s that?

ALANBRENT

(Lowers his head, drinksthe rest of water from glass)

Mosquito Soldiers ACT 1 – Scene 2

ALAN BRENT

What… what a cruel twist of fate it…

it turned out to be. He… he endured

it all through the Treblinka horror.

While she survivedhugeLondon bomb

smashingher… her family… neighbors.

Then came her incredible journey to

America and all that just to… to be

wiped awayby a postal truck at the…

the northernend ofBrooklynBridge

in… in New York.

GABRIELSCHOFIELD

Oh no! No! No!!!

(His face stiffens, tears showin his eyes, he gets up

towards window, weeps aloud, then quickly cools down)

I’m sorry, there’s no fool like an

old sentimental fool. And still, I

don’t really know what to say.

ALAN BRENT

(Gets to his feet)

I guess we… we may as well turn to

ourfellow Captain Alistair O’Neal

for… for a change.

GABRIEL SCHOFIELD

(Punches his left palm onto forehead, rubs the tears

off the corners of his eyes)

Of course, but of course. Such so

horribly careless wayit would be

to treatthe only son of our late

General KenO’Neal.

ALAN BRENT

(Chocking)

Ugh-huh-huh!I… I admit that such

thought did not arrive to my mind

not… not once before.

Mosquito Soldiers ACT 1 – Scene 2

GABRIEL SCHOFIELD

I’m surprised that it didn’t.But

still, I know some cleverfellows

saying that nothing ever gets too

late to cope with.

ALAN BRENT

I…I thought of paying him a short

call, if that’s fine with you too.

GABRIEL SCHOFIELD

It’s alright, but before you did, I

need to tell that his health record

readshighly poor at the moment. It

appears like destiny didn’t work in

favor of the youngchap most lately.

Commencing with too tragic death of

his own father.