The Joy Of Banking Quiz December 16, 2011
Banking is a joyous occupation. Please take this quiz together with your friends and family to test yourselves to see if you understand just how much joy bankers spread around the world.
1) Which of the following are examples of the absolute joy of being a banker?
A) In June of 2010 the US deficit was 68 billion dollars but the bankers sold 211 billion dollars in Treasury bonds and pocketed the 143 billion dollar difference.
B) Bankers have special access to all federal government computers and are allowed to steal up to 4 billion dollars a week which the politicians and the voters are not allowed to audit.
C) Because the schools are not allowed to teach the difference between an interest bearing currency and a debt free money bankers are paid 500 billion dollars a year in interest. That is 500 billion dollars a year because your money says Federal Reserve Note and not Treasury Note.
D) All of the above.
2) To practice the joy of banking government must have sympathetic regulators. Which of the following are examples of sympathetic regulators?
A) David Cameron allows rampant re hypothecation which is the practice of a banker reusing the collateral pledged by its clients. Cameron allowed 4 trillion dollars to be created through the magic of re hypothecation in London banks which appeared as assets on the books of American banks.
B) Ben Bernanke must have final say on which banks become Primary Dealers and act as NY FED counterparties. Bernanke certified MF Global as being qualified for this honor just three months before it went bankrupt and stole billions from its customers.
C) Wachovia-Wells Fargo laundered 378.4 billion dollars and paid a 110 million dollar fine with no jail time.
D) All of the above.
3) Which of the following bankers should be given the Presidential Medal of Freedom for spreading democracy and for demonstrating the joy of banking in dangerous situations?
A) The anonymous banker who went into Tripoli under fire and stole 144 million ounces of gold and 20,000 shoulder fired rockets.
B) The anonymous banker who on September 10, 2001 stole a billion dollars in gold and silver bullion from the COMEX vaults at World Trade Center Tower 4 the night before Towers 1, 2 and 7 were taken down by controlled demolitions.
C) Mario Draghi, Lucas Papademos and Mario Monti for taking over the European Central Bank, Greece and Italy and squeezing trillions of dollars out of Europeans for the benefit of Goldman Sachs, the Bilderberg Society and bankers everywhere. Please note they did this while the commoners were rioting in the streets of Europe.
D) All of the above.
4) Not all banking transactions are joyous. Which of the following transactions demonstrate the joy of banking?
A) Laundering 500 billion dollars a year in political bribes knowing that bribes make the world dangerous for honest men and women everywhere.
B) Laundering 400 billion dollars a year in illegal weapons sales knowing that bankers killed almost 80,000 Mexicans over the past five years in drug wars.
C) Laundering a trillion dollars a year in drug money knowing that you are killing 30,000 people a year in Russia.
D) All of the above.
5) Bankers are especially proud of their training program for young bankers that teaches them how to spread the joy of banking. Which of these following junior executive bankers deserved their 2 million dollar bonuses this year?
A) The Bank of New York Mellon employees who clip pensions funds on every transaction with look back pricing on foreign exchange. Please note the bank has 25 trillion dollars in pensions funds to play with.
B) The Goldman Sachs employees who clip every transaction on the NYSE. They are notified of every incoming transaction and buy the stock only to sell it micro seconds later at a higher price to the suckers in the pension funds.
C) All the young bank employees everywhere who mastered the art of Look Back trades. An example would be the young man who made 4 big trades in one day. He looked back over the trades of the day and assigned the three losers to widows and orphans and put the sole big winner in his trading account to meet his quota qualifying him for a 2 million dollar bonus.
D) All of the above.
6) Ben Bernanke stands alone in the history of banking as a giant amidst mere mortals. He is to be inducted into the Banking Hall of Fame just as soon as he has hyper inflated the dollar, the pound and the euro to zero value. Afterwards he will retire to the Cayman Islands. Which of the following should he cited as examples of Ben Bernanke spreading the joy of banking when he receives his much deserved reward?
A) Bernanke created 16.1 trillion dollars and gave 6 trillion dollars to European bankers to buy back fraudulent mortgage backed securities to keep American bankers out of jail.
B) Ben Bernanke loaned 7.7 trillion dollars at 0.01% interest to bankers.
C) Ben Bernanke used Quantitative easing to buy trillions of dollars in worthless securities from bankers.
D) All of the above.
If you guessed ‘D All of the above’ for every question, you won the right to do the following: 1) Print up and wear a Tee-shirt saying ‘You must have less so bankers can have more’ on the front and ‘I passed The Joy Of Banking Quiz’ on the back. 2) You have won the right to administer this quiz to friends and family, to radio talk show hosts, to your email friends and to complete strangers.
Warning: I am not responsible if a banker gets mad and puts you on a terrorist list qualifying you for a one way ticket to Guantanamo. Author’s Notes: This first article below explains more about bankers stealing money: LOL!! I Stole 3.5 Trillion Dollars From You. I Dare You To Do Something. This essay cites the case of the missing billion dollars in bullion from the COMEX vaults. 911: Short And Powerful Questions