Development-Behavior Pediatrics

BOOK REVIEW

Reviewer’s Name:
Karen Effinger / Date of Review:
11/2/06
Book Title:
Setting Limits with your Strong-Willed Child / Author:
Robert J. MacKenzie, Ed.D.
Intended audience for the book:
Parents of strong-willed/spirited children who are difficult to parent / Publisher:
Three Rivers Press

Content Summary:

Robert MacKenzie is a psychologist with a doctoral degree in counseling who is also the parent of two boys, one who could be classified as cooperative and one described as strong-willed. He was part of a research study on teacher effectiveness that allowed him to observe ways teachers communicated in their classrooms. He adapted these methods at home with his sons and after seeing the overwhelming results began to teach workshops for teachers and parents that have now turned into three books.

Setting Limits with Your Strong-Willed Child is divided in two parts, the first to help identify the problem with parenting “strong-willed” children and the second to teach parents skills to discipline these children. The book describes the meaning of temperament and how it affects behavior and the parent’s ability to discipline. It then describes the ways in which strong-willed children are able to learn and different ways parents try to teach their children. The author uses many personal and situational examples to concretely portray the terminology that he applies to describe both learning and teaching styles. MacKenzie dedicates a chapter to discussing parental limitations and uses many examples of how soft limits can lead to problems parenting strong-willed children. He then gives a guide to compare these types of poor parenting skills to firm limit setting that will help the strong-willed child. Then he places these problems in the context of the entire family and portrays how different teaching styles affect the entire family dynamic. After spending the first half of the book helping the parent understand the problems related to raising strong-willed children and how/why these dynamics are established, the author then spends the second half of the book educating parents on how to change these ineffective teaching methods to more easily care for their difficult children. He stresses the importance of giving clear messages and stopping the power struggle established within the family. MacKenzie stresses the importance of giving the child limited choices, and remaining firm in their rules. Another tool that parents are introduced to is the importance of immediate, consistent consequences to help the child realize what happens when the rules are broken or ignored. In this chapter, he describes the proper use of the time-out both at home and in public. The book ends with several chapters about how to motivate the strong-willed child using positive reinforcement, how to teach these new skills for coping with situations, and what to expect as the parent tries these new methods. The author also includes a timeline for parents to reference different chapters as they try to apply these methods to different aged children.

Strengths of the book:

-Straightforward without excess medical jargon

-Many cases/examples to illustrate points

-Tables and graphs to summarize key points along with large text boxes

-Written by a parent who also has a strong-willed child who draws on personal experience and experiences of those he has counseled

-Repeated acknowledgement of the difficulty in disciplining these children and encouragement to the readers

-Good chapter summaries

-Outline at the end to give parents a timeline for teaching skills to children of different ages

Weaknesses of the book:

-Points are usually made by giving examples/cases, which may be hard for individuals who like an exact plan to follow.

-Somewhat hard to extract teaching points from the commentary

-At times oversimplifies the situations and the difficulty of these tasks

Would you recommend the book?

12344.55

NOHighly Recommended