Positive parenting | A guide for parents and carers of children aged 0 - 4 years

Encouraging good behaviour

Establishing good behaviour early on

Every day, your child learns new things. It is what makes childhood so exciting. You have an important job in teaching them about values and beliefs and by being a good role model. Start early and see your hard work pay-off.

Using positive feedback is a great idea. Build up self-esteem by talking about their strengths. Being too critical can damage confidence. When they do something good, praise them and explain why. Rather than saying “Good boy” try saying, “You are a good boy for helping me”. It’s our actions and what we do, not what we say or moan about, which impacts on a child for life.

You can use positive feedback when they are misbehaving too. Tell them you are upset about their behaviour, not them. That way they will not see themselves as a bad person and know they have the power to change the way they act. It is up to you to set boundaries and rules in their life, which will change as they grow. Discuss your parenting styles early on with your partner so you both set consistent rules.

Life is busy but it is important to make time to spend together. Ask for help if you need it, there are many professionals who can give you hints and tips to help. Training and group work is available.

Positive feedback

  • Use positive feedback to build up self-esteem.
  • Praise your child when they do well and explain why you are pleased with them.
  • Children are happier if they have rules to follow.
  • Use play to teach your child good behaviour.
  • As they grow, change the way you encourage them.

Being a good role-model

Having a child means a lifelong commitment to someone who will need your care and support. If you are a parent then you are responsible in the eyes of the law for the safety, well-being and upbringing of your child. Your children are a reflection of you and your parenting. The most effective parenting tool we have is the example we set as good role models early on. This will help your child grow into a responsible, healthy and happy adult.

One

My child’s self-esteem seems low. They may say things like “I cannot do this”.

Two

Have you discussed this with your child’s Nursery Nurse or Teacher? Ask about training and group work

Three

Praise them where you can. Try to focus on what they are good at.

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