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Memory returned to me in 2-3/74 and things looked the same, not different. The voice didn’t say, “make things different” but “look different.” Merely look. It is a seeming change. Permutations of seeming, of appearance. But it’s counterfeit. The “things” are really a constant (e.g. the Empire). The goal: to make it appear (sic) that time has passed, but not time has passed. (v. “Stigmata” and the counterfeit worlds in which no time passes). He (“James-James”) has the power to cause changes. It’s like a movie in which the illusion of motion is created artificially. Here, there is a flow of change – of looking different – from which we falsely (are induced to) assume the passage of time, but for me in 2-74 I remembered that it still is c. AD 45.
1.) This is not necessarily true, about the axis. There may be no axis and no motion, just a progression of lookings different. Our brains are signaled as to these appearance changes with the result that we see what looks like USA 1974 but is not. The situation is worse than I
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had thought. I don’t know if even Gnosticism covers it. “Thomas” is not a former life but my actual life now. 1) It covers the standard amount of years (of a normal human lifetime). What happened in 3-74 is that I woke up to reality. But it has these counterfeit accretional layers over it. Our sense of time – of the passage of time – is the result of our scanning the changes of appearance, we record the changed along a linear memory-strip, sequentially (digitally). We derive the idea of time from sequential memory (of permutation or fluctuation): it is linearized in our brains. Our brains are so constructed as to linearize sequences so sequential seeming (i.e. aspect) permutations of an actually supratemporal constant trick our brains into this linearization (sense of actual passage of actual time). We derive our sense of how much time (whatever that may be) from the rate of change; therefore if change could be speeded up to ∞, thousands of years (sic) could be compressed into an actual month (so so). Use of LSD has brought this to our attention.
This makes me think of the furious rate of permutation of the phosphene “graphics.” Was the entire remainder of the “Karmic” tape run? It could be – have been – hundreds or thousands of years of tape – “burned up” and hence abolished. However much remained. Well, in that case I’m spared living all my future lives.
1.) “Ignorance can be thought of as forgetting the true self.” – Eliade[1]
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So rapid-firing aspect changes give the deliberately misleading impression of time-passage. All that is necessary is to cause things to look different (i.e. in sequence). This accounts for the perplexing synthetic quality of the two space-time continua which simply cannot be explained if there is true change and true time. The goal is to simulate time [passage]. Why? To give the spurious impression that the Second Advent did not occur. “…so it’d appear time has passed.” The basic lie, then, is not the “reality” but the impression vis-à-vis time that that “reality” gives; i.e. century after century of [what is really false] time. Meanwhile, like in “Stigmata,” we are prisoners of the master magician to do with as he wishes – except for the in-breaking (as in “Ubik”) of salvific messages and aid (specifically aid which extricates -- a primary form would be the awakening of us to our true situation * true selves (our true selves are inhabitants of Rome c. A.D. 45, i.e. Acts)). (and Acts is our true world.)
True self and true world can’t be separated nor can false self and false world.
In the age of iron Siddhartha (Brahman) sleeps, we sleep also. As we awake, he awakes; we’re him (He is us). But the age of iron does not progress into the age of gold sequentially; rather, the landscape of the age of iron wakes up and is transmuted into gold along its extent (orthogonally), like a sort of brain whose stations turn from dark to light the new heaven and the new earth replace the old (are substituted for).
The phosphene activity would be what I call the inner tape (ego) firing into a void, totally out of synch with the outer tape (world) which continued at its normal rate, thus it used itself up.
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I must keep in mind that this happened after I experienced anamnesis the month before (i.e. woke up briefly – that was the day I received the Sodium Pentathol[2]). The Bardo Thodol[3] lights/colors came before the phosphenes: the between lives period. So it was already running ahead. Yes, I was programmed to die soon after March 1974, but the 2-74 anamnesis interrupted that.
Meanwhile, I was left with a world which I was not inner-out synch-locked into. Meanwhile, full memory returned – of Acts, and of my celestial self and life, and I could see the savior/messenger who now attacked the outer “tape” – i.e. causal trains – i.e. external world, since the menace to me emanated there (the Xerox missive and various illnesses). Nothing I have ever seen was as startling as to see Zebra melting causal trains, reality itself. So once the inner tape had been run out at fast forward the outer tape was attacked. However, this left me rudderless in the world. During the interim period “Thomas” ran things – he seems to have spring up from deep inside me, released and restored by virtue of anamnesis. Possessing the wisdom he possessed, he did not need to be driven by a tape. Yet I am advised not to think of this as an override, but as the culmination of a long process: “You were doomed to be saved. There was no other possibility. Determinism determined determinism to end.” The tape consumed itself – it programmed itself to switch to unsynched fast forward and so play out all future lives in a matter of light hours. It was planned from the beginning to meet the Xerox missive with Thomas, not with the tape. Mind confronted the Xerox missive, as if it (mind) has trapped the trapper, has cured it premeditatively.
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The thing is, I would never have seen (or used) the Xerox missive as an opportunity on my behalf. This was impossible since I did not know who had sent it – could not know: it was masterfully disguised – in fact perfectly. No internal evidence gave any clue to its source & hence its meaning or intent: i.e. what it was. I am now told that it was a U.S. Army forgery, and so the meaning and intent can be inferred unerringly – and what response (out of all possible ones) would benefit me (in the normal spectrum none would have). Since lying is impossible by the divine, I had to be sincere in what I wrote the Bureau. Therefore I could not know at the time what I know now. (Even then I recognized my occlusion as necessary but did not know why.) Had I known, I would have had to engage in artful duplicity, which the divine ruled out. It waited years to tell me, when knowledge was academic.
Since it was a U.S. forgery, it was to my advantage, & mine only, to sense it to the Bureau. No KGB agent was flushed – the U.S. Intelligence Services did not benefit, as they would have had it indeed been Soviet, as I supposed it to be. I was the sole beneficiary; thus the mind-response was for my sake. Unless I am to suppose mind overruling itself (monism) I must assume a dualism: divine mind vs. the [evil] adversary, for which read Xtianity vs. the Empire. It must be kept in mind that my published writing presents the saving gnosis (truth about ourselves and our actual situation). In particular, the fifth
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savior is being prepared for (Part II of the Siddhartha book). “Tears” probably contains ciphers referring to this (King-Felix). Then I am a messenger. My writing is a letter designed to subliminally remind people, but only in conjunction with the other messages, not by me.
Recognizing my role as messenger I can make more sense out of the anomalous – or nearly anomalous – fact of my 2-3/74 anamnesis and all it brought me. I merely passed over from unconscious messenger to conscious (as in “Deus Irae”). My maximus opus “Valis” will be consciously formulated: restored man, redeemed Xtian superman, with his powers, knowledge and faculties intact – and the process of metamorphosis. It could not be written from an unconscious standpoint. Maybe it can’t be written at all.
Wait. Siddhartha. There is the handle: to cast it in a non-Xtian but Gnostic mold – rather than Empire-dominated orthodoxy. I will present it was the Buddha, or, even better, as it is: I will depict the fifth savior not identifying him with any of the previous four. He, the 5th savior, must supersede the previous four and be unlike them (be Pantocratos[4] [[?]])/ But what a task! Am I Elijah coming before him & preparing the way, as John the Baptist did? Elijah must come first – and, as I told Tom Disch[5], I originally felt it was Elijah who had taken me over – maybe it was, and for this purpose.
Yes -- consider my overwhelming intuition
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at the time – I was sure of it. I knew it. And the Elisha & “Alto Carmel” dreams. The way I figured it, he had returned as John the Baptist and hence was so afraid of the Romans, despite his fiery vigor. And I put out the cup for him – and I bought that book which told how he enthused people at Easter time. And the dream about Elias! (Bowed in sorrow at the Xerox letter not being returned to those who sent it.) I still have the drawing of Elijah up on my bedroom wall.
Then Elijah scourged this land (re the Empire, i.e. Nixon) to pave the way for the 5th savior who, uniquely, will be Lord and Judge.
Thus, almost 5 years later, I return to my original, initial view about who took me over – but this time on scriptural ground; viz.: because I know it prepared the way for the 5th savior who is soon to come, or has been born already.
I long have forgot the ferocity of “Thomas” – he was anything but meek. He was like a whirlwind. He was like the IRA itself. After all, he hurled down the Western Empire, pitting himself against the modern King Ahab. He made the land acceptable to God.
“A record was written before [the Lord] of those who feared him and kept him name in mind. They shall be mine… and I shall spare them as a man spares the son who serves him… the day comes, glowing like a furnace; all the arrogant and the evil-doers shall be chaff… but for you who fear my name, the sun of righteousness shall rise with healing in his wings, and you shall break loose like calves released from the stall. On the day that I act you shall trample down the wicked
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for they shall be ashes under the soles of your feet. Look, I will send you the prophet Elijah, before the great and terrible day of the Lord comes…
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In “Deus Irae” I identify the Xtian God with Apollo. (“The head Apollo is about to return.”)
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Elijah will come first – before the Messiah and “restore all things.” Vis-à-vis 2-3/74 I felt that everything I had lost had been restored; v. the trophy and washerwomen dream. Well, it was my state of exculpation – exemption from suspicion by the state, the authorities – was restored, etc., and much more. And the pain of those bad earlier years washed away.
And it was Elijah who heard the “still small voices” such as I hear.
It says in 1 Kings that Elijah “was afraid and fled” and he was suicidal at times. Mainly, he stood in opposition to the government (King Ahad), he sent back two parts of his spirit to Elisha.
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EB:
“Victory over astral determinism is a victory over time (and destiny) [1]. This info is important, since, for me in 2-3/74, the breaking of “astral determinism” over me was accompanied by what appeared to be a dysfunction or perturbation or even dissolving of time (i.e. it was no longer 1974), and because of this I viewed time as irreal (it became so for me, anyhow). The lower level (reality) of necessity, of immutable (yin) cause and effect was invaded for volitional mind. This stamps my sense of the breaking of “astral determinism” with the seal of authenticity.
[1] and according to the E.B., this is the main purpose of Gnosticism.
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Q: What is the relationship between “astral determinism” and time? It is because causality functions within and only within time?
E.B. on time perception:
“A hypnotized subject may be exposed to two clicks that delimit an objective. 10 second interval but is told that it lasts 10 minutes. On being asked to count objects for 10 minutes he may report having counted several hundreds without difficulty over what the experimenter’s stopwatch shows to have been 10 seconds.
(An objection, “He only thinks he counted several hundreds” is meaningless, because we are talking about perception, not time itself. And this is what I am talking about – not time but our perception (experience) of it.)
E. of Ph.: (time, consciousness of)
“Our consciousness of time: ‘Flow’ is our consciousness of things changing.”
To quote the AI voice again:
“He causes things to look different so it’d appear time has passed.” Let’s totally analyze this, since it agrees with the E. of Ph.
1) He. There is a conscious, volitional entity with the power to cause.
2) causes. His power.
3) things to look different. Not “be” but “look”, i.e. look to us, appear to us phenomenologically.
4) so very important. Purpose; what for follows.
5) it’d appear. He deceives us.
6) time has passed. Since it only appears to, it must in fact have not. “things to look different.”
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Stances for “observable change.” We deduce from the “observable change” – which is really him causing things to pass through successive changes of appearance to us – that “time has passed.” Now, is it possible to imagine any way that things could be caused to look different (to us) without them actually changing? Yes. Examples:
1) Under the influence of a drug, a completely unchanging object can look successively different.
2) Viewpoint of the observer can cause an object or objects to look different as that viewpoint changes.
3) Summary: changes in the observer can cause “things to look different,” i.e. change. Limited to and in the observer.
But maybe “look different” isn’t = to “look different to us.” They actually do look different i.e. present changing aspects. The notion of time is abstracted from things changing? No, from things looking different; these two statements are not identical. There stands between them a universe. A study of the proposition “our consciousness of time’s ‘flow’ is our consciousness of things changing” is inaccurate: “things looking different” is correct. We can’t say they change, only that they look different (or, appear to change; but “appear to change” doesn’t equal “change”). The proposition should read, “our consciousness of time’s ‘flow’ is our consciousness of things looking different.” Which, as I wrote supra, we linearize. But suppose it is a revolving sphere. Well, we linearize that, even though it repeats its looking different. Linear time is a conception, not a perception (v. the cyclical concept of the Great Year.)[6]
However, the thrust of the AI voice’s statement is that “he” wants us to think time has passed; this is the objective, his purpose. Causing
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things to look different is a stratagem, a means to that end. Here the 10 second-10 minute hypnotized subject’s ability to count objects in the hundreds comes in, only it is reversed: he is told that more time exists, and because of that he can see (effect) more changes. What of his experimenter has said, “You will count 300 objects and when you have finished, ten minutes will have passed,” – or rather, “300 objects will pass before you, and when the 300th has passed, 10 minutes will have elapsed” – and then, first, 300 objects are shot past in 10 seconds of RET, and then one hour of RET.
Still, the experiment as stated proves that we can be made to experience time in elastic ways. But the way our time perception [rate] is actually controlled is by the causing of things to look different: this is the regulator. I say, if the rate of things looking different speeds up we will think more time has passed, because we have no other yardstick (e.g. a hypertime) to measure it by. Here, the E. of Ph. statement essentially agrees with the AI voice, and is borne out by the E.B. experiment. In fact, the E.B. experiment is grotesque because it is not possible to count objects in the hundreds in ten seconds – so what really happened? Either the subject imagined he counted in the hundreds or –well, it’s absurd, like a dream. Reality itself, including the subject, is abolished, he is no counting at all. This proves that lacking the regulator of “things looking different” he would have no time sense – not just a faulty one but none. Time would cease, and with it reality as we know it. The E.B. experiment bears out what I present in “Stigmata,” by the way, which is the real point I’m getting at, if it can be demonstrated that many events can be experienced in little or no RET, then
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what is meant by “time”? Simple things looking different. But (as I say) since this looking different is the sole regulator, without which time ceases, then flow-rate is only a tautology for rate at which things look different, and what is this rate measured against? If it speeds up, what does it speed up in relation to? Or if it slows down, in relation to what? Clearly the things looking different is the sole arbiter, and is not in relation to any other standard.