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Memorial Drive

2/28/16

MARRIAGE: Living Out Our God-Designed Roles

Ephesians 5 …

Intro –

... THE MARRIAGE TEXT IN ITS CONTEXT

“Therefore BE CAREFULhow you walk, not as unwise men but as wise, making the most of your time, because the days are evil. So then DO NOT BE FOOLISH, but UNDERSTAND what the will of the Lord is. And DO NOT GET DRUNKwith wine, for that is dissipation, but be filled with the Spirit,speaking to one another in psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, singing and making melody with your heart to the Lord; always giving thanks for all things in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ to God, even the Father; and be subject to one another in the fear of Christ.” (Eph. 5:15-21)

... PAUL’S LEAD-IN: Four Imperatives That Warn

How does Paul introduce his instruction on marriage?

  • Be careful!
  • Don’t be foolish!
  • Understand!
  • Don’t get drunk!

“Therefore” tells us this relates to what has gone before, “submission” transitions into the teaching on marriage! This is serious business!

... PAUL’S LEAD-IN: One Final Imperative That Establishes a Critical Necessity

  • Be filled with the Spirit

Being “filled with the Spirit” essentially means allowing God’s Spirit to so fill our hearts and minds, our desires and our thinking, that He becomes the controlling influence in our lives.

When it comes to this thing called marriage, we need to understand thatat its core it’s

a highly SPIRITUAL matter! Marriage As God Intended It cannot be lived out as

if it’s independent of my spiritual condition and relationship with God!

So how are our spiritual lives in general?

  • Disciplined time in the Word?
  • A disciplined life of communication with God in prayer?
  • Other matters of my spiritual life that God wants to deal with?

... PAUL’S LEAD-IN: Filled With the Spirit – “Mutual Submission”, and Its Relationship

ToPaul’s Instructions for Marriage

What It Looks Like to Be Filled With the Spirit …

A final command … “be filled with the Spirit”

“… SPEAKING to one another in psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, SINGING and MAKING melody with your heart to the Lord; always GIVING thanks for all things in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ to God, even the Father; and BE(ING) SUBJECT to one another in the fear of Christ.” (Eph. 5:19-21)

Two Quick Notes …

  • Being “Spirit-filled” also results in being “subject to” others
  • “Mutual submission” is pertinent to the instruction on marriage

Two Reasons Why “Mutual Submission” Is Pertinent to Paul’s Instruction on Marriage …

  • “Submission” is carried over into the instruction on marriage

“andbe subject to one another in the fear of Christ, wives to your own

husbandsas to the Lord.”(Eph. 5:21-22)

  • The idea of “mutual submission” is used by some to annul the teachings of submission in Eph. 5:22-33

THE ARGUMENT: “Since mutual submission is the rule for all believers, it also applies to all husbands and to all wives who are believers … We conclude that mutual subjection … renders hierarchical distinctions irrelevant within the Christian communities of church and family.” (Quoted Biblical Manhood, 202, 494)

This “Submitting To One Another” Doesn’t Mean Every Christian Submitting To Every Other Christian In Exactly the Same Way …

Some say: A wife’s submission to husband is no different than God’s call

to a husband to submit to his wife. No hierarchy, no roles, no problem!

Notice the use of the word for submission in these texts: Luke 2:51 (Jesus to parents); Luke 10:17 (Demons to the disciples); Romans 13:1, 5, Titus 3:1 (Citizens to government); I Corinthians 15:27 (The Universe to authority of Christ); I Peter 3:22 (Unseen powers to Christ); I Corinthians 15:28 (Of Christ to the Father); I Corinthians 16:16, I Peter 5:5 (Of members to church leaders); Ephesians 5:22, 24, Colossians 3:18, Titus 2:5, I Peter 3:5 (Of wives to husbands); Ephesians 5:24 (Of church being subject to Christ); Titus 2:9, I Peter 2:18 (Of servants to masters); Hebrews 12:9, James 4:7 (Of Christians to God)

“The word is never ‘mutual’ in its force; it is always one-directional

in its reference to submission to authority.” (Grudem, 493)

Submitting to One Another In 5:21 Means Appropriately Submitting To Those God

Has Placed Us in An Authority-Submission Relationship TO

  • Appropriate submission in marriage: Wives to husbands (5:22-33)
  • Appropriate submission in families: Children to parents (6:1-4)
  • Appropriate submission in workplace: Servants to masters (6:5-9)

Paul doesn’t annul in 5:21 what he teaches about marriage, family, and workplace in 5:22-6:9

This is serious business! We must be wise, not foolish, and Spirit-filled in our marriages. This includes living out our roles by submitting to one another in appropriate ways!