How Do We Become Wise Or Gain in Wisdom? Confucius Once Said

Wisdom for Life

Being wise is said to know the right thing to do when the rules don’t apply. Most of life’s decisions are not moral or ethical dilemmas; they are not choices between right and wrong. But the many decisions we make heavily shape our success in our relationships, in our work, in our communities and in our own sense of satisfaction with our lives.

How do we become wise or gain in wisdom? Confucius once said,

“By three methods we may learn wisdom:

First, by reflection, which is noblest;

Second, by imitation, which is easiest;

and third by experience, which is the bitterest.”

This is a study that reflects on the wisdom contained in the book of Proverbs in the Bible which is one of the classic wisdom texts in ancient literature. Mostly written by King Solomon for prep school boys in the 9th century BCE, the text not only contains pithy timeless truisms but the underlying message is that to truly be wise, you need to have a deep understanding of the essence of human nature, desire, emotion and drives.

In this series, Dr. Tim Keller[1] demonstrates how this ancient text is so relevant in our current age. Since wisdom is gaining competency with regard to the realities of life, he applies not only Solomon’s wisdom but the wisdom of the whole Bible about relationships, emotions, our work, self control and many other topics to the situations that dominate our lives where we need wisdom that God provides.

True Wisdom - What is wisdom and why is it so important?

Training in Wisdom - How do we develop and grow in wisdom?

Wellspring of Wisdom - Where does wisdom come from?

Strangeness and the Order of God - If wisdom is competency with regard to the realities of life, what are the realities of life?

Knowing God - Knowing God is the foundation for having ultimate wisdom. What does it mean to fear the Lord and why is it so foundational?

Anger: The Healing of Anger - A requirement of being wise is understanding anger, both in yourself and others.

Sex: The Temptation of Beauty - To have wisdom, you must understand and manage the power of sexuality.

Money: Scattering Gathers; Gathering Scatters – Money is far more than the ability to buy things and create experiences. It is a power and unless you understanding its power in your life, it will be difficult to make wise decisions with your money.

Envy: The Evil of Envy - Envy has the ability to suck all joy out of our lives. Proverbs gives us wise answers to address envy.

Pride: Haughty Eyes - One of the most critical character traits to becoming wise is humility. A Biblical theme is that if you think you are wise, you are a fool. Paradoxically, only when you understand your foolishness do you become wise.

Work: Sluggardliness - Today there is more pressure on and less boundaries drawn around the topic of work. Proverbs talks positively (diligence) as well as negatively (sluggardliness) about work.

Self Control: A Broken Wall - A man or woman without self control will not live a wise life. They are like ancient cities without walls, vulnerable to invading armies.

Emotions: The Wounded Spirit - We all need wisdom to deal with our difficulties with our inner feelings, our psychological life.

Decisions about our Future: Your Plans, God’s Plans – Our future is made or lost on the basis of choices. How do we know what God would have us choose?

Learning Wisdom by Studying Foolishness: What kind of Fool are you? - God makes foolish the wisdom of this world. Understanding the cross will forever change what you see as wise and what is foolish.

Social Justice: Creation, Care and Justice - At the core of what it means to be wise is a concern for social justice. You aren’t wise unless you are living a life passionately committed to justice.

Success and Suffering: The Two Great Tests - Success and suffering are situations that create both danger and opportunity in our character and spiritual life.

Words - How you speak and the words you use will radically shape your relationships and your life.

Friendship - You won’t live a wise life unless you are good at choosing, forgiving and keeping terrific friendships.

Repairing Relationships - Right relationships will make or break your life. Maintaining these won’t happen unless you know how and why relationships break down and how you can repair them.

Family - In the area of family, unwise choices can be devastating. Proverbs provides timeless guidance for spousal relationships as well as the relationships that parents have to their children and adult children to their parents.

The best way to discover how these truths can be applied in our lives is through discussion. Prior to our weekly sessions, we will individually listen to the talk on the selected topic and then spend our time together discussing the topic and sharing our thoughts and experiences with each other.

We hope you join us in our quest for wisdom for life.

Wisdom from Proverbs

Tim Keller

1. True Wisdom / Proverbs 8:10-16; 22-31 / What is wisdom and why is it so important?
2. Training in Wisdom / Proverbs 3:1-12; 30:1-4 / How do we develop and grow in wisdom?
3. Wellspring of Wisdom / Proverbs 4:11-22 / Where does wisdom come from?
4. Strangeness and the Order of God / Proverbs 5:16-23; Revelations 21:1-5 / If wisdom is competency with regard to the realities of life, what are the realities of life?
5. Knowing God / Proverbs 3:5-6, 9:10, 16:6, 19:23, 20:9, 23:17-18, 28:14 / Knowing God is the foundation for having ultimate wisdom. What does it mean to fear the Lord and why is it so foundational?
6. Anger:The Healing of Anger / Proverbs 14:29-30, 15:1,18;16:32;19:11,19; 24:28-29; 25:21-22 / A requirement of being wise is understanding anger, both in yourself and others.
7. Sex: TheTemptation of Beauty / Proverbs 5:15-19; 11:16, 22; 30:18-20 / To have wisdom, you must understand and manage the power of sexuality
8. Money: Scattering Gathers; Gathering Scatters / Proverbs 10:15-16, 22; 11:1, 4, 24, 26; 13:21, 23; 30:8b-9 / Money is far more than the ability to buy things and create experiences. It is a power and unless you understanding its power in your life, it will be difficult to make wise decisions with your money.
9. Envy:The Evil of Envy / Proverbs 23: 17-18; Psalms 73: 1-3; 20-26 / Envy has the ability to suck all joy out of our lives. Proverbs gives us wise answers to address envy.
10. Pride: Haughty Eyes / Proverbs11:2,12; 13:10; 15:25,33; 16:18-19; 21:4; 28:26 / One of the most critical character traits to becoming wise is humility. A Biblical theme is that if you think you are wise, you are a fool. Paradoxically, only when you understand your foolishness do you become wise.
11: Work: Sluggardliness / Proverbs 8:1-4; 10:4-5; 12:10-11; 15:19; 22:29; 27:18 / Today there is more pressure on and less boundaries drawn around the topic of work. Proverbs talks positively (diligence) as well as negatively (sluggardliness) about work.
12. Self Control: ABroken Wall / Proverbs 18:10; 23:19-21; 25:28; Titus 2:11-14 / A man or woman without self control will not live a wise life. They are like ancient cities without walls, vulnerable to invading armies.
13. Emotions: The Wounded Spirit / Proverbs 12:25; 13:12; 14:10,13,30; 15:4,13-14; 16:2; 18:14; 28:1 / We all need wisdom to deal with our difficulties with our inner feelings, our psychological life.
14: Decisions about our Future: Your Plans, God’s Plans / Proverbs 11:3; 12:5,15; 15:22; 16:1-4,9,25,33; 21:5; 27:1 / Our future is made or lost on the basis of choices. How do we know what God would have us choose?
15. Grace and Glory / Psalm 113: 1-9 / This is the Christmas sermon that is not part of the series.
16. Learning Wisdom by Studying Foolishness: What kind of Fool are you? / Proverbs 1:22, 32-33; 8:27-32; 14:15; 15:5; 16:25; 19:25; 21:24 / God makes foolish the wisdom of this world. Understanding the cross will forever change what you see as wise and what is foolish.
17. Social Justice: Creation, Care and Justice / Proverbs 3:17-20, 27-32; 11:10-11; 19:17; 29:7 / At the core of what it means to be wise is a concern for social justice. You aren’t wise unless you are living a life passionately committed to justice.
18. Success and Suffering: The Two Great Tests / Proverbs 3:9-14; 10:16, 25; 24:10-12 / Success and suffering are situations that create both danger and opportunity in our character and spiritual life.
19. Words / Proverbs 10:18-19, 31-32; 12:13-14, 17-18; 15:1, 4; 16:23, 28; 18:13, 21; 24:26; 25:11, 15 / How you speak and the words you use will radically shape your relationships and your life.
20. Friendship / Proverbs 17:17; 18:24; 25:17,20; 26:18,19; 27:5,6,9,14,17; 28:23; 29:5 / You won’t live a wise life unless you are good at choosing, forgiving and keeping terrific friendships.
21. Repairing Relationships / Proverbs 10:18; 11:12-13;17:9;24:17-18, 28-29; 25:7b-10,21-22;27:5-6 / Right relationships will make or break your life. Maintaining these won’t happen unless you know how and why relationships break down and how you can repair them.
22. Family / Proverbs 2:16-17; 3:11-12; 5:18-20; 12:14; 13:4, 21-22; 17:2; 18:22; 20:20; 22:15; 23:22-25 / In the area of family, unwise choices can be devastating. Proverbs provides timeless guidance for spousal relationships as well as the relationships that parents have to their children and adult children to their parents.

1. True Wisdom

Proverbs 8:10-16; 22-31

What is wisdom?

The Importance of Wisdom (v. 10-11)

Wisdom is more important than gold, silver and rubies. More important than fame, riches and all the other things society tends to value.
Wisdom is not the same thing as moral goodness. Related to moral goodness but not the same.
Wisdom is not less than being ethical, but so much more.
For most decisions in life, simply knowing the rules or having knowledge won’t help you.
You can be brilliant, well informed, well read, morally upright or highly disciplined but wisdom trumps them all.

The Definition of Wisdom (v. 12-16)

v.14 “sound judgment” – knowing how things really work
v.12 “prudence” – knowing how things really are
v.15 “By me Kings rule” – knowing what to do about it
Wisdom: competency with regard to the realities of life
Wisdom: knowing what to do when the rules don’t apply

The Problem of Wisdom (v.22-31)

All non-biblical creation accounts are results of a random accident or a power struggle between the gods. The biblical account has creation as a result of wisdom.
This means there is a well thought out order to creation. The world is an intricately woven fabric and has a pattern.
Example: An object that obeys the rules of aerodynamics will fly. Just like there are physical realities that must be followed, there are relational and spiritual realities that must be followed or there will be breakdown.
Foolishness is going against the pattern that God established
To be wise, you must know two things:
There is a pattern to the world
You cannot know it all
Proverbs is broken up into two parts. Chapters 10-15 explain principles and what will usually result when you follow the pattern established by God. Chapters 16-31 talk about the exceptions to these principles.
A liberal fool: “There is no pattern to the world. I have to determine what is right for me.”
A conservative fool: “I can see the whole pattern. If you live right, then good things will happen to you.” Example: Job’s friends – trying to figure out the sin that created the bad things.
We all have tendencies toward being a conservative or a liberal fool. As a nation, we are divided on this and it is pushing us into more foolishness.

The Clue to the Solution

No one proverb gives you the whole story. Each one provides you with a perspective but to see how they all fit together, you need a community to work through how wisdom is applied in everyday life.
In proverbs, wisdom is personified. What if wisdom is not learning moral rules or a body of knowledge but a person you could know and love? What if wisdom was in the form of a person who could counsel you?
Christ: “I am the wonderful counselor. I am wisdom. A relationship with me is the path to wisdom.”
John 1: “In the beginning was the Word (reason, wisdom)” and the wisdom of God became flesh and truth in the form of Jesus Christ.
Three truths of God’s wisdom:
Wisdom of God to you –Jesus is the argument for the existence of God.
Wisdom of God for you - In some ways, Jesus was like a sage but instead of simply giving advice, he gave himself when he died for us.
Wisdom of God with us – Even when you can’t see the wisdom of God, it is there.

1. True Wisdom

Proverbs 8:10-16; 22-31

What is wisdom?

Questions:

Was there anything in the talk that provoked a new thought or idea or that you found disagreeable or hard to swallow?

Who is the wisest person that you know and why do you think they are so wise?

Wisdom is defined as competency with regard to the realities of life. Can you provide any examples of where this is true?

What is the difference between wisdom and knowledge?

Verses (8) 22-31 provide a poetic creation account. What does this teach us about wisdom?

Proverbs personifies wisdom (e.g. “by me Kings reign.”) Is this merely a literary device?

How can those of us with moralistic (conservative) tendencies be foolish? How can those of us with relativistic (liberal) tendencies be foolish? Can you provide example where you see this in action?

2. Training in Wisdom

Proverbs 3:1-12, 30:1-4

How do we gain wisdom?

Wisdom is the ability to know the right thing to do in the 80% of life’s situations where the rules don’t apply. The sermon discusses how we get or develop wisdom. How do we grow in wisdom?

The Path of Wisdom

v. 6 “he will make your path straight” Wisdom is likened to a pathway
Walking down a path is done by boring mundane activities. Right foot, left foot, right foot, left foot—over and over again.
According to Proverbs, who you become is not so much a function of the big dramatic decisions and events but from all those little choices that you make. You become wise by taking on a certain set of repeated disciplines.
Wisdom is a pathway, not a door. You don’t enter into wisdom with a technique (a door), you enter into wisdom by slowly becoming the kind of person who through God’s guidance you become the person who makes wise choices (a pathway).
CS Lewis (Abolition of Man): Sages of old said you learn how to conform your soul to the world’s reality through wisdom. Today, we want to conform reality to our own wishes through a technique.

The Process of Wisdom (the practices that will make you wise)

Knowing God (v.3 “love and faithfulness”) – It is not enough to know God loves you, if you want to become wise you must find ways to pound it into your heart that he is absolutely committed to you. Wise people have an internal calm and poise which come from knowing God is committed to you.
Knowing self (v. 5,7) – To be wise, you need to know you own weakness and besetting sins. If you don’t know these, you will make stupid choices. If you need approval or have fear of failure, you will deny your flaws and make excuses. You need ruthless yet non-traumatic self-examination.
Knowing your friends (v. 1) – You’ll never find wisdom by yourself. You need mentors, friends, counselors. The fool is an individualist but a wise person is always asking for help. You only get wisdom through communication, you only get information through a class. The discipline of letting others speak to your issues is part of the path.
Knowing God’s best practices (v.1) –“my teaching….my commands (Torah)” You’ve got to master the Scripture. You’ve got to master God’s database of best practices. The Bible speaks to our words, emotions, money, family, etc. Practicing these are the right/left, right/left of the wisdom.
Knowing trouble (v.11-12) –Wisdom does not avoid suffering, it transforms suffering into more wisdom. Don’t despise or reject suffering but let trouble teach lessons of wisdom. During troubled times you learn wisdom faster.

The Man off the Mountain

Thinking of trouble as a teacher of wisdom is a not a sufficient answer to those who are experiencing devastating suffering.
Agur, a wise man say in Proverbs 30, “I am lost, not wise. We need another to interpret the wisdom. Who has come down? What is his name and the name of his son?”
Jesus says, “I have come to bring you the ultimate wisdom but not in an abstract proposition but through the cross.”
Jesus lived an absolutely perfect life, he personified wisdom and all his decisions were wise. Yet he experienced the worst kind of suffering.
Jesus doesn’t tell us the theory of dealing with suffering; he suffers with us.
The cross is the beginning of wisdom. You have to take the cross into your heart and see that Jesus’ wisdom is upside down to what the world says. You win through losing. You rule by serving. You become wealthy by giving your money away. That is the cross’ wisdom.

2. Training in Wisdom

Proverbs 3:1-12, 30:1-4

How do we gain wisdom?

Was there anything in the talk that provoked a new thought or idea or that you found disagreeable or hard to swallow?

CS Lewis points out that sages of old said that we learn to conform our souls to the world’s reality through wisdom. Today we want to conform reality to our own wishes through a technique. What does this mean and do you think that you see this happening in our culture? Can you think of some examples?

Is your natural inclination to think of wisdom as a door or a pathway? What are some personal examples of thinking of wisdom as a door? Is this necessarily a bad thing?

Knowing God: What does Keller mean when he says that wise people have an internal calm and poise in life’s situations? Do you see that in practice with people you consider wise? Why or why not?

Knowing self: What does it mean to have “ruthless yet non-traumatic self evaluation?” How close do you get to practicing this? How can we encourage each other in this regard?

Knowing friends: “The fool is an individualist but a wise person is always asking for help.” Do you agree with this and if so, how do we create a community where we can help each other become wise? Think of some practical ideas.

Knowing God’s best practices: What is the difference between best practices and rules? Are you a “best practices” or a “rules” kind of person? How differently do you approach each?

Knowing trouble: Do you have examples where trouble helped you become wiser and be willing to share them with the group?

How has understanding the cross helped you become wise? Are there any practical suggestions on how we can rub the oil of the cross’ healing powers into the chambers of our heart?

3.Wellspring of Wisdom