Gathering Together in Love

GATHERING TOGETHER IN LOVE

Hospitality and Welcome

A Congregational Retreat

University United Methodist Church

Rev. Paige Eaves, Pastor

May 13, 2017

Mary J. Scifres

Congregational Coach & Retreat Facilitator

949-715-4630

INVITING SOMEONE TO CHURCH

Inspired by an article by David Cannella, Existence Church

INVITING THOSE WHO ARE CLOSE TO YOU

Family, friends and those in your inner circle at work - Foster friendships first

Keep it as simple as any other kind of invitation to hang out.The key is to be real and ask from the heart by integrating something tangible from your relationship into the invitation.

• “Hey Steve I’ve told you about how this church has been impacting me in my life. Why don’t you come this Sunday with me and then we’ll grab some brunch after?”
• “Sara, you know how I told you I have been kind of depressed since my Dad died? Well this church has really helped me get through this season. We are doing a message series and I think you would like it. I’d love for you to come with me this Sunday.”
• “Dan, remember how you told me you and Susan were having some parenting issues? I think this series would really help you. Why don’t you come with us and then we can have lunch afterward.”

THOSE WHO ARE NOT CLOSE TO YOU

Co-workers, acquaintances, neighbors, household employees – Foster friendships first

Use more of a general friendly invitation. They will be honored that you actually thought of them and even if they don’t come, it will still move your relationship forward. Keep it light and casual but don’t let fear stop you from asking a question that could change the course of their spiritual direction.

• “Darrell, you do such a great job on our lawn and I’m not sure if you have plans for this Sunday, but I have been attending this really cool, relevant church and I’d like to ask you come check it out with us soon. No big deal if you can’t but I was thinking of you.”
• “Maria, I love the spirit you bring to our classroom meetings. You remind me of our Education Director at church, who runs this really cool Messy Church on Thursday nights. Would you like to attend our with me sometime and let your children check out our Messy Church or some Sunday morning and they can try out KidJam while you and I worship?

THOSE YOU DO NOT KNOW

Passers-by, occasional acquaintances – Foster kindness first

Keep it casual, short and sweet.

• “Is this your neighborhood? I go to church right around the corner. Would you like to with me and check it out some Sunday?”
• “Are you new to his area? I know a great church, in case you’re interested.”
• “I noticed you’ve been quieter these last couple times I’ve been in your shop. Is there anything I can do to help? Or anything perhaps my church could be praying for?

INVITATION IS AN OPPORTUNITY

Imagine the day when someone you know is worshiping God with a smile of joy as they stand next to you. Can you see their face as they sing out of love to the one who has given them peace that passes all understanding, sent them on a new mission and purpose and life, and satisfied their soul the way only God can? Can you feel the warmth when they’re receiving a hug from another church member who’s helped them through a tough time? Can you sense the enthusiasm as their child runs up with a KidJam drawing? That picture can be real, but it starts with an invitation.

GREETING GUESTS & NEW FRIENDS WITH EASE

Mary Scifres, Congregational Coach & Retreat Facilitator

Introduce yourself, rather than waiting to be introduced

Seek out the “stranger” and help them to feel welcome

Allow people to go at their own pace

Take initiative in sharing information

Recognize that much of church stuff is “new” to many guests

Don’t assume people know where to go or what to do

Avoid using “churchy” language or language distinctive to our building when giving directions (i.e. Rather than saying “Pastor Paige is up by the pulpit,” point to her & say, “That’s our Pastor Paige Eaves up front.” Rather than saying, “Messy Church is in the Williams Building,” point to the building, saying, “We meet at the end of that building on Thursday night for Messy Church. Do you want me to meet you out front?”)

Give understandable, clear directions (i.e. “After worship, many of us hang out on the patio for coffee & refreshments. Do you want me to wait for you after worship so we can have a cup of coffee together?”)

Help people to feel comfortable with our worship style (If screen isn’t working, find the hymn page # and hand your neighbor an open hymnal, pointing out where the song begins. If it’s greeting time and you see a newcomer unsure of what to do, approach them, offer a greeting, and explain that this is a time when we briefly greet one another before returning to our seats for worship.)

Notice People

Respond to what you notice

Does a new guest look confused? Ask if you can help or answer a question

Does a parent look overwhelmed? Help them hold children’s hands & get children settled in to worship

Is a person struggling to help with their spouse with a mobility need? Ask how you can be of assistance.

Does a person look lonely? Help them find someone to sit with.

Is a person struggling with the hymnal or worship handout (bulletin)? Help them find the right page or point out where we are in the order of worship.

Let people know they’ve been noticed (in a non-threatening manner)

Find a box of facial tissue & hand it to someone who seems teary-eyed

Invite people who seem to enjoy singing to come to choir rehearsal next week, or introduce them to a choir member during coffee hour

Comment on how well-behaved someone’s child was during worship, or help someone to feel comfortable when their child is squirmy

GREETING GUESTS & NEW FRIENDS WITH EASE

(continued)

Know your church and its resources

Read worship handouts, announcements, newsletter, bulletin boards, flyers

Listen to announcements

Visit various church events

Pay attention to more than just the details that you’re interested in so that you can help guests who have other interests and needs)

Know where things are located & share that information

Bathrooms

Changing table in Williams Hall women’s or nursery in Education Building

Rocking chair for parents with babies - Family Space

Family Space includes guest packets, crayons & coloring paper for children

Education Building, Williams Hall, classrooms or meeting rooms

Sanctuary for Worship

Church Office for questions or to leave messages for staff or pastor

Handicapped Parking

Patio for Coffee Hour – beautiful new configuration coming soon!

Kitchenettes in all buildings for someone who needs a drink of water

Encourage guests to visit Welcome Table for more information & to sign up for mailing list

Sanctuary open weekdays from 9-1 for Preschool Parents, but all are welcome!

Upper Room, guest packets, or other resources available on sanctuary back table and in church office and on front desk of Education Building;

Books available for review or borrowing in the church library alcove of office

Know the Sunday morning schedule& help people to fit in

9:15 Check in for 9:30 Kid Jam & Childcare in Education Building

9:30 Morning Worship in Sanctuary

9:30 Youth in GLOW or Worship in Youth Room/Student Center

11:00 Dream Church Worship in Sanctuary (beginning June 4)

10:45ish Coffee Hour, Refreshments, & Time for Socializing on Patio

10:30 Noiseful Joy rehearsals during school year

1:00 p.m. Nozomi Japanese UMC - Worship or Fellowship

GREETING GUESTS & NEW FRIENDS WITH EASE

(continued)

Know upcoming events & church programming details

Summer & Christmas Choir Concerts

Movie Sermon Series in August

Vacation Bible School June 19-23

Wednesday Evenings 7:30 Choir Rehearsal (break for August)

Messy Church last Thursday of every month 5:30 in Fellowship Hall

Methodists on Campus (MOC) meets Thursday, 6 pm at Eureka Burger (breaks in summer for a Sunday lunch group; time, date & location to change in fall)

Sisters Book Group – last Tuesday of every month in homes

(MUMs) - Methodists Uniting Moms, 2nd & 4th Thursdays, 9 a.m. Education Building, starts again Oct 25

Wednesday morning Devotions Bible Study – 7:30 in Church Office Parlor

Sunday morning Men’s Bible Study – 8:30 in Education Building

The location and content of KidJam

Pastor Brandon hosts frequent Bible studies as well (most in Korean)

Lunch Bunch – 11:30 - Tuesdays after Disciple Bible Study, open

Quilters Ministry - Usually in Fellowship Hall on Saturdays)

Upcoming luncheons or social events

Special seasonal worship services

Annual Women’s Retreat

Annual Mission Trip

Youth Sierra Service Project

Youth (GLOW) Schedule

Review the church calendar printed in the worship handout, particularly to notice changes in the regular schedule so you don’t send a guest to an event that’s been changed or cancelled

Church Office Hours are Monday - Thursday, 9-5, always staffed by office volunteers

Church Phone 949-786-8354,

How can someone join the Prayer Chain? (Diane Masenten, )

How can someone request a prayer? (Call church office or email Diane.)

How can someone request a visit from Pastor? (Call church office or email Pastor Paige)

How can someone check out a book from the library? (Fill out card & put in check out file)

When is the next “big church event”?