MIDDLE SCHOOL ENGLISH INSTRUCTION: Unit 6, Lesson 51

Focus of the lesson: revising for word choices

  • Revise for clarity. Choosing the right words to say what you mean makes your writing more precise and more vivid. As you revise for word choices, you need to:

Look for words you’ve used too often. Find synonyms for each of these words and use them as replacements.

Look for words that are common or weak. Weak verbs are usually too general; instead of walk, use a word that more precisely describes the manner of walking: amble, teeter, stroll, stride, skip, bounce, etc. Weak verbs don’t tell enough about the action described. Sometimes a simple word is best, but often you can find a more precise or colorful word to replace it.

Look for weak modifiers such as very or so. Replace them with stronger words. If a beast was very ugly, he probably looked hideous. The weather wasn’t just very hot; it was sweltering.

ACTIVITY 6-5-1

Complete the activity on using precise words that begins below.

Using Precise Words

Here's the Idea: Choosing the right words to say what you mean makes your writing moreprecise and more vivid. In looking for the right words, be aware of synonyms and antonyms.Check their meanings in a dictionary or thesaurus.

Synonyms are words that have nearly the same meanings. Nibble, devour, and gulp aresynonyms for eat. Yet there are slight differences in meanings. You aren't very hungry if younibble something. You're starving if you devour it. You're in a hurry if you gulp it.

Antonyms are words with opposite meanings. They include such pairs as pleasure-painand cold-hot.

DIRECTIONS: Read each of the following sentences. Write the synonym that is most appropriate in the context of the sentence. Use a dictionary, if necessary.

1. Tony decided to ______his trip to Antarctica until December.

retainretard postpone slow

2. The car is coated with a special paint that will ______rust.

resistoppose withstand combat

3. Uncle Ted ______the property next to ours.

got acquired gained obtained

4. The possibility of rain posed a ______to our garden party.

threat danger warning menace

5. The guard's job was to ______the rear entry.

superintend chaperone patrol supervise

6. Peter intended to ______the house to its original condition.

reorganizeconvert reinstate restore

7. Harmful gases are ______through the exhaust pipe.

expelledexcluded ejected evicted

8. May needed a special ______for her role in the school play.

dresscostume attire outfit

9. The endless, boring speeches served to ______the meeting. extend protract prolong lengthen

10. The baseball player had to quickly ______the ball from the outfield all the way to home plate.

toss fling cast hurl

ACTIVITY 6-5-2

Click on the link below for practice with replacing weak verbs. Be sure to do the activity—“Now it’s your turn,” Parts A and B.

Verb Worksheet

ACTIVITY 6-5-3

Complete the activity on pp. 3-4 of the lesson for practice with eliminating awkward, repetitive phrasing and language. Sentences 1 and 2 have been done for you.

PRACTICE WITH REVISING TO ELIMINATING AWKWARD, REPETITIVE PHRASING & LANGUAGE

REVISE EACH SENTENCE BELOW. THE FIRST TWO HAVE BEEN DONE FOR YOU.

1. Our expectation was to establish new tolerance levels.

We expected to establish new tolerance levels.

2. There were expectations by the governing committee that their report submission would meet the deadline.

The governing committee expected that their report would meet the deadline.

3. The governor’s refusal of the request is a necessity.

4. More accurate measurements of the thorium half-life were conducted at that time by independent investigators.

5. There was no independent business-sector analysis of the cause of the trade deficit.

6. There was uneasiness among management over the survey.

7. The discrepancy in the data demands checking by the insurer.

8. The performance by the police of an investigation into the affair occurred without delay.

9. It is my belief that there should be consultation by the administrators with the student body before changes in rules are made.

10. The President’s recent assertion in regard to the chronic inability of the press to present information accurately and fairly is an insightful description of press reporting in the Middle East today. Indeed a comparison of the coverage of different events in the region will reveal the inaccuracy of his statements.

  • Revise for vivid language. Your word choices should enable your reader to see, hear, taste, smell, and feel—to experience vicariously whatever you are writing about.

ACTIVITY 6-5-4

Click on the link below for practice with selecting vivid language. Do the exercises on pp. 25-28.

Selecting Vivid Language

ACTIVITY 6-5-5

Now reread your paper to make sure that your word choices communicate what you want to say in the best way possible. Revise to make sure that word choices are appropriate, precise, specific, and vivid.