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Sample Theological Blueprint for Ministry Remodeling

What’s Happening?

Super Sidekicks of iLIFE Youth Ministry at *** Cumberland Presbyterian Church is in its second year. An adult volunteer from the congregation is paired with a youth to be a positive, Christian, adult influence and presence in the life of the youth. The requested commitment of the adult isto be in prayer for the youth, to send a birthday card, to attend an extracurricular activity, to plan a meal or other outing together, and to attend iLIFE meetings quarterly on a scheduled date.

This partnership was started for the following reasons:

  1. To support youth through a positive, Christian influence and presence with an adult from the congregation other than the youth group volunteer leaders,
  2. To provide an opportunity for adult members of the congregation to have a relationship with a particular youth who is a faceless body in a group of youth whom they support spiritually and financially,
  3. To give youth who have few adults in their life an opportunity for another positive, Christian adult resource, and
  4. To enrich the life of the congregation through intergenerational relationships and for both persons in the partnership to acknowledge and embrace more intimately the parts of this particular body of Christ.

Both the youth and adult are provided basic information about their Sidekick, including contact information, social media participation, school/place of employment, activities, and hobbies. The adult is encouraged to contact the youth’s parents to introduce themselves (before direct contact with the youth is made), pray for the youth consistently, and to contact or meet the youth as much as possible, but minimally with a birthday card and by attending iLIFE meetings quarterly.

The only change in Sidekick guidelines in year two is the added request for adult Sidekicks to attend a scheduled iLIFE meeting quarterly. This was added thinking it would help adult Sidekicks connect with their youth in person, more easily, rather than trying to attend an activity of the youth or set up a time to meet. During these youth meetings, the typical schedule is followed, but particular attention is given to the type of community building activities planned so that Sidekicks can get to know one another better.

Some adult Sidekicks go above and beyond what is requested of them; some do less than what is requested. This creates differences among the youth: some feeling like they are left out or not liked because their Sidekick did nothing to make connections during the year, or only minimally so, while another youth received birthday and Christmas presents, nights out for pizza and a movie, and visits at their ball games or concerts. For something that is supposed to be a personal, relational ministry, the hurts a youthsustains from feeling overlooked are damaging and the integrity of the ministry is impaired.

Because fewer adults were willing to participate in year two, some of those who did volunteer have partnered with two youth. This places a higher level of commitment on these adults and potentially decreases the depth of the relationships with the youth by the adult being “split” between two.

Why is itHappening?

There is a decreased participation in the number of Sidekick volunteers in year two because, at least in part, of increased commitment in the addition of a quarterly youth meeting. Some who volunteered in year one declined to volunteer in year two, saying they did not want to come to a youth meeting, though wouldn’t explain why that was a hindrance. Another reason for decreased participation is youth who aren’t members of the congregation, but attend youth group, are viewed differently by some congregants whoare only interested in being partnered with youth who are members of the congregation. Also, perhaps congregants feel that the youth leaders are called to teach, lead and minister to youth, so why should they invest personal time into a relationship that isn’t really necessary?Of course, not having enough adult Sidekicks could be due to poor communication on my part in explaining the meaning and purpose of adult Sidekicks or the need for them, or the belief that they just aren’t needed.

What Should be Happening?

The original plan isn’t providing much benefit to our youth or to the congregation. There was great difficulty in adults agreeing to become Sidekicks and we were well into the year before we had all youth partnered with an adult, some sharing an adult Sidekick. The Sidekicks vary greatly in the amount of time spent in contact with youth, and the overall commitment level has declined.

In the Cumberland Presbyterian Church, the congregation takes a vow during baptism. After vows are taken by the person being baptized, or by parents of an infant child, the minister asks the congregation, “Do you, the people of God, members of Christ’s church, promise to share with this new member the good news of the gospel, to surround (him/her) with compassion, and to support (him/her) through prayer, fellowship, and direction?”[1]Following a prayer, the sacrament of baptism is administered. “After the act of baptism, the minister shall charge the congregation with respect to their responsibilities.”[2] The vow taken by members of the congregation seems to commit them to being spiritual guides or co-journeyers in life and faith with the young person who was baptized. And the final charge by the minister to the congregation, reminding them of their responsibilities, emphasizes the importance of this vow.

We make baptismal vows and we talk about Jesus journeying with us through our life and faith: “And surely I am with you always, to the very end of the age,” (NIV Ma. 28:20b) but then we expect adolescents to walk through their teen years alone when we know that they are in critical emotional, physical, and spiritual developmental stages. Why can’t we understand why so many young adults leave the church or practice spirituality in ways other than within a Christian community? We’ve dismissed them, we’ve been too busy for them, or we’ve decided their care is not our responsibility, and in doing these things, we are guilty of passing on some mutant, or incomplete at best, version of Christian faith and discipleship.

Give Practical Guidance

Some form of spiritual friendships should be planned for and encouraged between iLIFE youth and congregational adults.Friendships require emotional investment. Emotional investment requires time. There is no emotional investment when you wave as you drive by, or swing by a baseball game to clap for a great play, or even drop a birthday card in the mail. These are cordial, even thoughtful, gestures, but these alone are not friendships, yet this is the kind of thing our Sidekick ministry was asking folks to do—just drop by when it’s convenient; you don’t have to stay long. Well…you do. We do. Even in year two, asking adults to come to youth meetings once a quarter was a half-step in the right direction, but it wasn’t enough, even though some adults were too afraid or unwilling to invest that much of themselves. The Sidekicks ministry needs to be much more intentional and request an even greater commitment from adults than before. Sidekicks need to become spiritual friends (John 15:12-17).

In addition to an emotional investment and time commitment, a spiritual friendship “…requires intentionality, discipline, humility, sensitivity, prayer, and discernment: pointing out divine fingerprints here, surfacing a spiritual tussle there.”[3]Adults asked to join this ministry as spiritual friends would need to practice all these things, possess certain characteristics, and would need to be willing to attend orientation and training sessions prior to launching this ministry.

Youth also have much to offer adults in spiritual friendship.It seems that in every circle of the church encountered, whether board meetings at various judicatory levels or youth ministry conferences or in the grass roots of congregational life, I hear that youth are the future of the church. How can so many educated church leaders and biblical scholars overlook who makes up the body of Christ, the numerous teenagers in the Bible called by God for specific service, or Jesus’ actions and words regarding children, “But Jesus called the children to him and said, “Let the little children come to me, and do not hinder them, for the kingdom of God belongs to such as these”? (NIV Luke 18:16). Some youth advocates are screaming, “Youth are the church now!” but it hasn’t yet taken a predominating hold in the church.

God promised Abraham, “I will make you into a great nation,and I will bless you;I will make your name great,and you will be a blessing” (NIV Genesis 12:2).The concept of being blessed in order to be a blessing is often used as a theological stone upon which to stand. The idea of being a blessing to others and being blessed in the process is something often expressed by persons who have been on mission trips or who regularly volunteer and who serve with the intention of helping or blessing another, but then feel they end up receiving more than what they have given. We need to broaden the general view of“being blessed to be a blessing” to include our whole lives (not just “missions” or “service projects”) and each encounter with another living being or thing.

Ministry Practice Redefined

Many would judge a relationship between a youth and an adult as being an imbalanced one, assuming the adult would be doing most of the blessing and most of the giving. However, if we believe in true spiritual friendships, healthy relationships, youth as full members of the body of Christ, and Abraham’s example and God’s calling of being blessed to be a blessing, then the Sidekicks ministry should be redesigned. The ministry will be renamed Blessed2Bless and will focus on building spiritual friendships between an iLIFE youth and an adult (identified as Spiritual Friend) from the congregation and also focus on creating a web of care for each iLIFE youth with two additional adults (identified as Sidekicks).

The expected number of regular iLIFEattendees for the 2012-13 year is 27. Each youth will enter into a spiritual friendship with an adult (Spiritual Friend) from the congregation. This friendship would continue throughout the youth’s teen years and, formally through this ministry, until high school graduation.Also, each youth will have two additional adults (Sidekicks) who will covenant to pray for them and to connect with them in a casual way during congregational services and activities.

The adults sought as spiritual friends would be those adults who are willing to commit to the emotional investment, time and purpose of this ministry. They need to be willing to be completely honest and genuine or teenagers will dismiss them in short order.Exercising qualities of humility, sensitivity, patience, and general integrity would be most helpful. Youth should exercise these same qualities, and both adults and youth engaged in spiritual friendship should be willing to share their story as part of God’s story and help the other share theirs as well. Adults sought as prayer partners and encouragers would be those who are unable to physically commit (due to age or health) or unwilling to commit (for whatever reason) to being a spiritual friend.

The purpose of Blessed2Bless ministry hinges on three scriptures:

  1. “I will make you into a great nation,and I will bless you;I will make your name great,and you will be a blessing.” (NIVGe 12:2)

2.“If one part suffers, every part suffers with it; if one part is honored, every part rejoices with it.Now you are the body of Christ, and each one of you is a part of it.” (NIV 1 Co 12:26-27)

3.My command is this: Love each other as I have loved you. Greater love has no one than this: to lay down one’s life for one’s friends. You are my friends if you do what I command. I no longer call you servants, because a servant does not know his master’s business. Instead, I have called you friends, for everything that I learned from my Father I have made known to you. You did not choose me, but I chose you and appointed you so that you might go and bear fruit—fruit that will last—and so that whatever you ask in my name the Father will give you. This is my command: Love each other. (NIVJn 15:12-17)

Threeobjectives replace the four original reasons for starting this ministry:

  1. Spiritual Friends, both adults and youth, will co-journey with one another through committed, Christian lifestyles.
  2. Sidekicks will pray for and encourage youth through casual encounters in the life of the congregation and community.
  3. The life of the congregation will be enriched by these relationships through the intentional andintimateembracing ofthese members of this particular body of Christ.

Asking adults to attend iLIFE meetings is replaced with quarterly activities or projects with a purpose and scheduled at a time other than regular youth meetings. One-on-one contact between spiritual friends will be encouraged through this ministry, but initiated by those in friendship. Suggestions will be given to Spiritual Friends if they seek ideas.As Spiritual Friends and Sidekicks are sought as ministry volunteers, the purpose of this ministry and role expectations will be explained as well as provided in writing. (See Appendix 1)

Ministry Practice Obstacles

Four obstacles have been identified:

  1. Seeking a long-term commitment from Spiritual Friends and bucking the post-Christian, postmodern culture,
  2. Including youth who are not members of the congregation,
  3. Understanding it is not just the youth leaders’‘job,’
  4. Improving communication.

One way to counter the first obstacle is with education for the church body. One announcement in every congregational service, one reminder in every bulletin and newsletter, and frequently changing banners on the church website to convey theological and sociological messages of importance for this ministry. Quotes from youth and participating adults could also be communicated and might carry more weight than any comment from a youth ministry expert.This educational process should also include an emphasis on the three scriptures of purpose for the ministry and the benefit to the congregation by fulfilling these purposes: a congregation who is enriched by the gifts of its members, blessed by being a giving and blessing body, and is growing spiritually by the intentional seeking of Christian community and witness.

Orientation and training is necessary for the participants and would include the following areas:

  1. Adult Spiritual Friend Orientation and Training
  1. Introduction to Blessed2Bless ministry and three key verses of purpose
  2. Child Safety training
  3. Incarnational ministry (theology & scripture)
  4. Body of Christ (CP doctrine & scripture)
  5. Adolescent development
  6. Context and culture
  7. Grand metanarrative discussion
  1. Sidekick (prayer partners and encouragers) Orientation and Training
  1. Introduction to Blessed2Bless ministry and three key verses of purpose
  2. Child safety training
  3. Mini incarnational ministry (theology & scripture)
  4. Body of Christ (CP doctrine & scripture)
  5. Mini adolescent development
  6. Context and culture
  7. Grand metanarrative discussion
  8. 20 minute connections discussion
  1. Youth Orientation and Training
  2. Introduction to Blessed2Bless ministry and three key verses of purpose
  3. Child safety awareness
  4. Incarnational ministry (theology & scripture)
  5. Body of Christ (CP doctrine & scripture)
  6. Grand metanarrative discussion

The second obstacle to be countered is the full acceptance of youth group attendees who are not members of the congregation, but attend other congregations for worship or none at all. Some members of the congregation feel that preferential treatment should be given to youth who regularly attend or are members of our congregation. God made each of us gifted and with purpose to complete the body of Christ. We are equally loved and grace-bestowed. We are to love and serve in humility, taking the place of a servant, and we should not think more than this of ourselves, or expect more than this for ourselves.

The third obstacle, thinking it is only the youth leader’s “job” to spend time with youth, flies in the face of the biblical concept of the body of Christ, Cumberland Presbyterian theology, and baptism vows. Additionally, there is research and academic support on the importance of positive adult influences in the lives of youth and the difficulty, if not impossibility, of the youth leaders’ physical ability to meet all needs of the youth. All of this should also be touched upon in the education of the congregation.

The fourth obstacle is perhaps the one youth leaders have the most control over: improved communication. The preceding ministry was organized and communicated at the beginning of the year, but there was no ongoing communication to the congregation or to the volunteers. With the revised ministry, all forms of communication would be used: face-to-face and one-on-one, announcements to the congregation in worship or via other small groups, and information printed in bulletins, newsletters, and on the website. The number of media used would be an improvement, and the frequency would also be an improvement by being very regular, either bi-weekly or monthly and dependent upon the ministry participant (Spiritual Friend, Sidekick, youth)and whether a member or leader of the congregation(see timeline below). Also part of communications will be the seeking of feedback on the revised ministry from spiritual friends (both adult and youth), Sidekicks, and leaders of the congregation to aid in evaluation of the ministry and necessary adjustment to ministry components (see timeline below).