THE CHOICE IS YOURS, REALLY? By Mini P. Thomas Story Dated: Tuesday, February 4, 2014 13:50 hrs IST
The last thing she remembers is picking up the shiny piece of metal to stick on her jeans. Then came the explosion. And the world of 13-year-old MalavikaIyer changed forever.
She lost her arms and her legs sustained multiple fractures. There was nerve paralysis in the right leg and loss of sensation in the left when the bomb shell that came from the ammunition depot at the Army area in Bikaner exploded in her hands. As she was recuperating, all that the avid dancer and swimmer wanted to do was climb the stairs that led to her room.
She knew her seemingly simple wish would take long to come true, but she was not one to sulk. She concentrated on her studies and was the class 10 state topper in 2004. The 24-year-old is now doing her PhD on disability and the need to change societal attitudes and perceptions towards individuals with disability.
There were times when she felt defeated. “But then I would look at the mirror and smile at myself. That would totally cheer me up,” says Iyer. She now uses prosthetic arms and can't walk for more than five minutes at a stretch. Does she miss her life before the accident? “No. My life has become more happening now. I'm living the life of a rock star,” she says.
The young girl is a winner because between crying over her loss and challenging life head-on, Iyer chose the latter.
Tea or coffee?Jeans or skirt?Jam or peanut butter? Life seems like an endless string of choices. What makes you choose what you choose?
“Sometimes we have a major dilemma while making a choice,” says Dr Sheena S. Iyengar, S.T. Lee Professor of Business at Columbia Business School in New York, in an exclusive interview with Health. When it comes to studies on choice, Iyengar is a pioneer. “We think we know what we want, but more often than not we don't actually know what we want. And what we want keeps changing,” says Iyengar. Even if you know what you want, making a choice can be a complex task. There should be suitable options to choose from and then one has to make trade-offs. Iyengar's book, The Art of Choosing, gives insights into how we make choices in our daily life and how we feel about them later.
There are times when you keep chasing an elusive choice. “It can leave you unfulfilled and lead to all kinds of problems,” says Iyengar. She has studied how people from different cultures respond differently to choice. “Americans love choices. They want more choices, even if they are very similar to one another. People in India or Europe don't necessarily want more choices, they want more directions,” says Iyengar.
Ethnicity can play a major role in the choice you make and the way you define them. When Iyengar asked American and Japanese students to record all the choices they made in a day, the Americans mentioned even things like brushing teeth and hitting the snooze button. Interestingly, the Japanese didn't consider them choices.
The number of options also seems to influence one's decision. The more choices people have, the more confused they get and they make worse choices, observes Iyengar. That was one of the key findings of her famous jam study at Draeger's supermarket in California in the late 1990s. Iyengar set up her own tasting booth at the supermarket for the study. Her team offered samples of British jam to the customers. There was an assortment of 24 flavours and another small group of just six. Many shoppers checked out the large assortment but only 3 per cent of them bought it, while among those who tasted from the small assortment, 30 per cent ended up buying. Iyengar's findings: people are attracted to stalls that offer more flavours, but they are more likely to buy if there are fewer options.
Studies say that a shopkeeper should offer five to nine options. That is the cognitive limit of the human brain.
Suppose you have decided to buy XYZ flavour jam. Sitting at your dining table, would you wonder if ABC was a better flavour? These are decisions that may not have far-reaching consequences, but experts say that a problem in the brain area associated with decision-making can lead to bad decisions. “There is a clear-cut region in the brain called ventromedial prefrontal cortex associated with such impairments,” says DrKeshav Kumar J., associate professor and consultant neuropsychologist at the neuropsychology unit of the department of clinical psychology at the National Institute of Mental Health and Neuro Sciences (Nimhans) in Bangalore. “Ventromedial prefrontal cortex is involved in decision-making. Those who have a disruption in this area don't gain from experience. They have myopia for future. They have high risk behaviour, too, and they need immediate gratification. In such people, the limbic system takes control over the regulatory frontal lobe. So the executive function and decision-making are always driven by emotions. When the emotions overrule thinking, decisions go wrong and they make wrong choices.”
One cannot certainly ask for a peek of the brain for that perfect choice, but asking one's well-wishers, especially on matters of life and living, can help make good decisions. “Think of the pros and cons,” says Iyengar. “Ask your friends and family for their advice. Try to generate more choices. Find options which are better than the ones you have. All these can help you have what your heart yearns for.”
MonalishaGantayat of Orissa recently decided to adopt a baby instead of getting married, but not before discussing it with her family. “I discussed it with my parents. They are quite cool about it. In fact, they wanted to adopt a child when I was small. But then I wouldn't let them because I was insecure,” says Gantayat, 24. “It is not because I'm not able to conceive or want to be a mother. I would rather be a mother to a child who needs a home. I think that will make my life more meaningful than getting married.”
When Alex Paul Menon, deputy chief electoral officer, chose to stay in Sukma even after being held hostage by the Maoists for 12 days, many wondered whether it was a wise decision. “It was in fact a choice between staying selfish and running away from responsibilities or staying back in an hour, where the staff and the poor people who had come out in support of releasing me, needed me the most. I chose the second. To me the essence of civil service is Gandhiji's talisman. That decides many of my choices,” he says.
While long-term decisions are thought many times over, it is often the simple day-to-day choices that are difficult to stick to. Like following a diet or exercise regimen to a T. It takes sweat, determination and hard work, says AarthiSudeep, a homemaker from Gonicoppal, Coorg, about her gym schedule. “But I work out every day, even if it is late hours up to 9 p.m. If nothing else, a long brisk walk is a must for me,” she says. Exercise pays off—Sudeep, in her early forties, has a flat tummy, a toned body, with no love handles. Her eat-outs are few and far between and she ensures there is no junk food or sweets at home. “Timely food also keeps me away from temptations,” she says. As for the mind, she maintains a reasonable reading habit and communicates with friends.
Your choices determine your physical and mental well-being, as well as how you fare in life. Even the simple choices you make every day can have a cumulative effect. So how can one choose better? Be aware that your choice can easily be manipulated. The way information is presented to us, the advertisements, the emotional appeal, all these can have a huge impact on what we choose. That may even turn against our best interests. Keeping this in mind can help us make better choices.
What if you are forced to choose against your best interests? “Look at the choices you have and zero in on the best you can out of it,” says Iyengar.
That is exactly what Iyengar did herself. Having lost her eyesight to retinitis pigmentosa during childhood, her choices were limited. But she made the most of them.