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MOVING INWARD: PRAYING TO A HIDDEN GOD
Sermon in Dialogue by Nancy S. Cushman & Sarah Cushman
Psalm 13 John 14:8-14
May 14, 2017 Mother’s Day North Scottsdale UMC
SETTING THE CONTEXT
Last week we used the metaphor of the Good Shepherd to talk about the intimacy between Jesus and his followers. This week we see that intimacy nurtured and nourished through prayer. As I’ve overheard the prayers of our spiritual ancestors, one of the things I’ve learned is that we can bring anything to God through prayer. We can bring our happiness and gratitude; we can bring our frustration and anger. Today’s reading from Psalms is a form of prayer that we don’t use much in church- it is a way of praying for those times when we don’t feel God’s presence, when God seems hidden and absent.
The psalm is attributed to King David; there are a number of these kinds of psalms where he is crying out for help. King David spent much of his life at war; he had many experiences of being surrounded by enemies. In this prayer, we see an intimacy with God that allows David to express all of his fear freely and honestly.
Read Psalm 13
What we just read is a classic prayer of lament or prayer of complaint. In the prayer of lament, a person is completely honest with God pouring out disappointment while holding on to reverence, mounting despair while yearning with dogged hope.
Reading 2: Today’s Gospel reading is set in a long teaching after Jesus has washed the feet of his disciples during his last supper with them. Judas had gone out to betray him. With his disciples gathered, he does one final teaching. In this chapter, Jesus tells them he is going away to the Father and the disciples are trying to understand what that means.
Read John 14:8-14
Jesus tells Philip that he is a reflection of God. We see God through him. When God feels hidden and distant, I think it is helpful to look at Jesus- to read about his compassion, his care for those who were struggling.
THE SERMON
Nancy: Since this was Mother’s Day Sunday, I have been thinking about being a parent. Sometimes being a parent is really hard especially when you see your children struggling.
Sarah: And the Lord knows she didn’t have an easy child to raise. (pause for laugh)
Nancy:When it comes to times of struggle, as you know, I have a really hard time not jumping in immediately and trying to fix things. A real turning point for our relationship was when you started saying to me,
Sarah: “I don’t need you to be a Pastor right now, be my mom and stop trying to fix it and just listen!”
Nancy: I can’t tell you how many times I’ve heard that. But it’s hard because as a parent we love our children and we don’t want you to struggle or to be hurt.
Sarah: I heard this story the other day. On a small twig there was a caterpillar. It was his time to make his chrysalis. A little girl walked by and watched as the caterpillar wove his chrysalis. She was so excited for the caterpillar to come out, so she waited and watched. One day she saw that there was movement inside. Something was struggling to get out. She got so excited and could not wait any longer. She took and ripped open the chrysalis. Inside was a beautiful butterfly. The little girl was so happy to see the butterfly and could not wait to see it take its first flight. What the little girl didn’t realize is that because the butterfly never struggled to break itself out of the chrysalis, it’s wings never became strong enough for it to ever fly.
Nancy: Wow, that is an amazing parable and something I’ll hold onto for a long time.
Sarah: Something that has been a hard lesson to learn, especially for parents, is that if we do not struggle, we do not strive. In order to transform we must struggle. What’s important for us to know is that struggle is needed for us to become strong.
Nancy:That is a good lesson as a parent.Instead of struggle being a negative thing it is sometimes a necessary thing. So what is the best thing for a parent to do when a child is struggling? It seems like there is this balance between supporting your child and letting them grow through struggling.
Sarah: And this is something that will be different for every parent-child relationship and every situation. But always letting us children know that we are loved and that you will always be there as a supporter helps us in the end. As much as we want you all to be genies and grant our wishes with a snap of a finger, we would never grow, we would never understand what it meant to become an adult, or what you were trying to teach us before we reached adulthood.
Nancy:We talk about God as a Father or Parent. I think this parable speaks about that as well. Sometimes we expect God to jump in and fix everything for us. I know that there have been times when things didn’t happen when I wanted them to or I wasn’t sure that they would ever happen and I got so frustrated with God. God seemed hidden and unresponsive.
Sarah: We have all faced or will face times where we feel God has deserted, become absent and abandoned us. As people of the church and faith, we all have questioned where he has been for us. We have called and cried out in our prayers for the answers. But what do we do when they don’t seem to come when we want them?
Nancy:The old writers spoke about the Deus Absconditus- the God who is hidden. Perhaps though it is really “the God who is allowing us to strengthen our wings.” When you read the Bible stories so many people have experienced times where God seems absent or disinterested. Like David, they didn’t hide their frustration, they prayed a prayer of complaint or lament.
Sarah: The psalmist talks directly to God. There is no “wonderful and gracious God,” he starts with “How long? Will you forget me forever?”
Nancy:I remember a time when you were little. I was busy doing something and you were talking to me. At one point, you grabbed my face and turned it to you and said, “Mommy listen to me!” A prayer of lament feels like that to me, “God listen to me! How long will you ignore me!” In the prayer of lament, we share with God our disappointment and distress honestly and openly. It’s like we verbally shake our fist at God even as we want God to hold us close.
Sarah: It changes from what sounds like fear and anger, to a praise of God. David speaks about singing and knowing that God is always there.
Nancy: In some ways, it reminds me of when you all were teenagers and you would be pushing us away some moments and wanting us close other moments. It was bewildering; that’s why when you started telling me what you needed from me it was so helpful because we are so different and I am clueless sometimes on how you need me to communicate with you.
Sarah: It took some time for us both to figure it out. I didn’t know how to talk to you either. My talking turned into yelling and yelling got us nowhere…. Except me… I got grounded. But once we figured it out it has changed and strengthened our relationship to something I didn’t realize was possible. #bestfriends :) <3
Nancy:I don’t think God gets bewildered like a human parent, but I think we need to tell God what we need or want or just pour out what’s really going on with us. There is something very powerful in that honesty. When I prayed for a husband for years, I would get so frustrated with God, I prayed many prayers of complaint or lament, but now I can look back and see that we needed that time to be ready for each other. We were each in our own chrysalis and God had us meet at just the right time.
Sarah: When God seems hidden and distant, we can not only look at Jesus, but everyone else that God lives in and works through. We as a faith community, as a family are reminders that God is always there when we may not see him. It is the love and support that the church makes visible.
Nancy: Yes, when we had a very rebellious teenager, I remember older folks in the church reassuring me, “It is going to be OK. They do come through it eventually.”
Sarah: Which rebelling teenager? Josh or myself? As hard as it was, you were still patient and supportive. I remember being that rebellious and so angry. What was really interesting is that there were times when I was struggling and thought I needed you and dad to step in and fix everything, and when you didn’t come in and fix it all I thought that your support was hidden. Just as we sometimes feel God’s hidden. But you weren’t, you were allowing me to understand the lesson I needed to learn, you were letting me grow and you were always being supportive.
Nancy: When you started college,you didn’t work very hard on the school part. After a couple of years, you came home defeated, feeling like you weren’t any good at school. We had to really encourage you to take the CAN (Certified Nursing Assistant) course.
Sarah: Oh, that CNA course. So much work in such a short time. But at least we know I can almost save a life now… well at least treat an owie! But in the time before going to get my CAN, there was a lot of time that you and dad had to wait and trust in the plan God had for me. Trusting that God’s work was guiding me to the path that I needed to be on.
Nancy: It was really hard to watch you go through that. We knew your potential and it felt like you were wasting time, but it wasn’t a waste; it was like time in the chrysalis. You were so defeated when you moved back home. In the CNA course, you learned with some work you could be successful. And look where you are now. An A student in a doctoral program! And you can manage a budget! Would you have believed then how you are soaring now?
Sarah: I know! I will say being this successful is very tiring though. I could use a nap. Having learned my lessons and now accepting the new lessons that come my way, it has made life a lot more enjoyable because I am welcoming the struggle because I know that there will be change and growth. It also makes me appreciate seeing the struggle and growth in those around me or the growth that our family goes through.
Nancy:Exactly, like how last week, we went to Damian’s (my grandson’s) black belt testing. He has worked since he was 4 years old to accomplish this goal of getting his black belt. It wasn’t an easy road; it took hard work and dedication. What really impressed me was that his training teaches him how to strive, work hard, to be pushed to his limit, how to fall or take a punch and get up and get back at it. It really is incredible training for life and it was amazing to see that through his perseverance and struggle, he accomplished something so amazing.
Sarah: In life there will always be struggle, we will all face times where things seem hard, impossible, or unfair. It is in these moments we will question why us? And where is God because he seems hidden. It is in these times and trials that we will struggle and struggle. While we are in that time of struggle we can pray the prayer of lament, we can be honest with God. Hopefully at some point we will see, it is in the struggle where we transform and build our strength that will allow our wings to fly. My mommy and I gave you butterflies when you came in today to remind you of that parable and to encourage you. Amen.+