Includes Formative Assessment Strategies

‘Valentine’

Carol Ann Duffy

Pupil Unit

Critical Essay: Poetry

‘Valentine’

Carol Anne Duffy

By the end of this Unit you will be able to write Critical Essays on the poem ‘Valentine’.

You will be able to write relevantly about the centralconcern(s)/theme(s) of the poem and be able to support your views by reference to appropriate poetic techniques.

You will learn about/revise the following techniques:

Imagery

Tone

Word Choice

Structure

Symbolism

You will be able to adapt your knowledge of the central concerns/themes of the poem and the techniques used to answer questions which ask you to choose a poem…

‘…which you feel is particularly relevant to a teenage audience.’

‘… in which … a seemingly unimportant incident acquires increased significance by the end of the poem.’

‘… in which you feel there is a significant moment which reveals the central idea of the poem.’

‘… which creates a sense of menace.’

‘… on the subject of love.’

‘… in which there is a noticeable change of mood at one or more than one point in the poem.’

Activities in this unit are designed to be performed in classroom conditions involving discussion, peer assessment and written assignment. The teacher will facilitate the lessons and discussions giving appropriate advice and modelling when appropriate.

‘Valentine’

Carol Ann Duffy

Not a red rose or a satin heart.

I give you an onion.

It is a moon wrapped in brown paper.

It promises light

like the careful undressing of love.

Here.

It will blind you with tears

like a lover.

It will make your reflection

a wobbling photo of grief.

I am trying to be truthful.

Not a cute card or a kissogram.

I give you an onion.

Its fierce kiss will stay on your lips,

possessive and faithful

as we are,

for as long as we are.

Take it.

Its platinum loops shrink to a wedding-ring,

if you like.

Lethal.

Its scent will cling to your fingers,

cling to your knife.

The poem is not about an onion.

You have 2 minutes to discuss with a partner what the poem is about!

Focus of Close Analysis

‘the positive aspects of love conveyed in the poem and how Duffy has conveyed her speaker’s positive attitude through imagery, word choice and symbolism.’

Pupil

‘Valentine’ by Carol Ann Duffy

First we are going to examine the positive aspects of love conveyed in the poem and how Duffy has conveyed her speaker’s positive attitude through imagery, word choice and symbolism

Duffy uses the extended metaphor of an onion to show her speaker’s positive attitude to love.
Working with a partner, complete the table below.
Model your responses on the two that have been done for you.

Context/
Understanding / Evidence/Quote / Analysis/
Evaluation/
Personal Response
The title of the poem suggests that it will deal with fairly conventional notions of love. / ‘Valentine’ / Connotations of hearts/flowers/romance – we all like the idea that someone loves us and cares enough to show it through giving us gifts
Yet unconventional gift offered - an onion. / ‘It is a moon wrapped in brown paper.’ / Excellent metaphor -moon is a conventional symbol of love – suggests romance; ‘brown paper’ – no fancy wrappings to disguise the object – truth/honesty. This is very believable.
Positive aspect of love - optimism at the beginning of a relationship / ‘promises/light’ / HintComment on the word choice of ‘’promises?
Is this ‘convincing’?
The longer a relationship lasts it will become more serious and may lead to marriage – a commitment which is not to be made lightly. / ‘Its platinum loops shrink to a wedding-ring,’ / [cc1]Hint
What does Duffy’s persona suggest about the relationship in this metaphor?
Is this ‘convincing’?
Positive aspect of love - optimism at the beginning of a relationship – love has many layers. / ‘It promises light
like the careful undressing of love.’ / [CC2]Hint
Strength and power of the relationship. / ‘…faithful,
as we are, / [CC3]Hint

Mini Essay

Your teacher will model how you should use the information from one of the rows of the table to suit a “line of thought” and how you should link the information ensuring that whenever a statement is made there should be analytical and evaluative comment made

The following can be done in pairs, each pairtaking one or two rows from the table:

Write your paragraphs and swap with another pair or group.
The other group should consider whether anything else can be added.
Use your notes from the template to help you.
Your mini-essay should show understanding (context), reference to the text (quote) and evaluative response (analysis and personal comment).

Examine the model below to see how you can structure and link your ideas in your response to the task above:-

Context/
Understanding / The title of the poem suggests that it will deal with fairly conventional ideas of love:
Evidence/Quote / ‘Valentine’
Analysis/Evaluation/Personal Response / In this word there are connotations of romance. We all like the idea that someone loves us and cares enough to show it through giving us gifts like flowers and chocolates.
Context/
Understanding / Yet Duffy’s speaker offers an unconventional symbol of their love to their partner. The gift of an onion is presented by the persona as a positive expression of their feelings for their partner:
Evidence/Quote / ‘It is a moon wrapped in brown paper.’
Analysis/Evaluation/Personal Response / The moon is a conventional symbol of love and this metaphor suggests romance, tenderness and sensitivity. The ‘brown paper’– the skin of the onion – shows that there are no fancy wrappings to disguise the object implying that the relationship will be based on truth and honesty. This is very believable as we would all like to think that our partners will not only treat us sensitively and tenderly and keep the romance alive in our relationship but also that they will have no secrets from us.

Peer Assessment

How did you get on? Working with a partner, use the checklist below to assess whether or not you have included all necessary information in your mini-essay.

If you have used all the information from your table and the model which your teacher provided, you should have very little to improve in your mini-essay.

Context/
Understanding / Evidence/Quote / Analysis / Evaluation / PR / ‘line
of
thought’
‘Valentine’
‘It is a moon wrapped in brown paper.’
‘Its platinum loops shrink to a wedding-ring,’
‘promises/light’
‘faithful,’
Technical Accuracy
Topic Sentence
Full stops/capital letters used properly
Varied sentence structure
Quotes set out properly
Spelling correct
Linkage used eg In addition/furthermore/moreover/yet etc

Focus of Close Analysis

‘The negative aspects of love conveyed in the poem and howDuffy has conveyed, through imagery, word choice and tone, that her speaker/persona becomesincreasingly frustrated by their lover’s rejection of the gift of the onion and eventually adopts a threatening attitude.’

Pupil

‘Valentine’ by Carol Ann Duffy

In this section, we are going to examine ‘the negative aspects of love conveyed in the poem and how Duffy has conveyed, through imagery, word choice and tone, that her speaker becomes increasingly frustrated by their lover’s rejection of the gift and eventually adopts a threatening attitude.’

Negative aspects of relationships conveyed in the poem

Duffy uses the extended metaphor of an onion to show her speaker’s increasing frustration that the gift of an onion has been rejected. Eventually, the speaker adopts a threatening attitude as their lover refuses to accept the gift.
Working with a partner, complete the table below.
Model your responses on the two that have been done for you.

Context/
Understanding / Evidence/Quote / Analysis/
Evaluation/
Personal Response
The onion represents a relationship which may ocasionally cause you pain. / ‘It will blind you with tears
like a lover.’ / Simile – truth/honesty – suggests love can cause distress; Word choice suggests pain and grief. Believable – in relationships, one partner can often be cruel/ hurtful.
The onion is like a mirror – but the image may be distorted.. / ‘It will make your reflection
a wobbling photo of grief.’ / Extended metaphor – ‘wobbling photo of grief’ – pain/tears/distress can be caused by relationships/ truth/honesty; word choice suggests pain and heartache. I am certain that this is the case – relationships are not always completely agreeable.
Powerful love is very difficult to forget as is a brutal/violent relationship. / ‘fierce kiss will stay on your lips,’ / [cc4]Hint
Strength and power of the relationship – a change in the relationship. / ‘possessive and faithful,’ / [cc5]Hint
The longer a relationship lasts it will become more serious and may lead to marriage – which may become a restrictive relationship. / ‘Its platinum loops shrink to a wedding-ring,’ / [cc6]Hint
Intense relationship may lead to violence. / ‘Lethal.’ / [cc7]Hint
Powerful love is very difficult to forget and may lead you into dangerous situations where the final outcome may be brutal/violent. / ‘Its scent will cling to your fingers,
cling to your knife.’ / [cc8]Hint

Mini-Essay

The following can be done in pairs, each pair taking one or two rows from the table:

Write your paragraphs and swap with another pair or group.
The other group should consider whether anything else can be added.
Use your notes from the template to help you.
Your mini-essay should show understanding (context), reference to the text (quote) and evaluative response (analysis and personal comment).

Examine the model below to see how you can structure and link your ideas in your response to the task above:-

Context/
Understanding / The onion represents a relationship which may ocasionally cause pain:
Evidence/Quote / ‘It will blind you with tears
like a lover.’
Analysis/Evaluation/ Personal Response / The speaker’s desire to be truthful and honest is shown by the use of the simile which implies thatlove can cause distress. Similarly, the word choice used to show that an onion will make you cry suggests that love will cause you pain and grief. At this point, I feel that the speaker is not actually trying to offend their partner but simply ensuring that their partner understands what the onion represents. There is no malice in this statement as the speaker only wants to make sure that their partner does not misunderstand the message contained in the gift of an onion. This is entirely believable as in relationships one partner can often be cruel or hurtful, even without intending to upset the other person.

Peer Assessment

How did you get on? Working with a partner, use the checklist below to assess whether or not you have included all necessary information in your mini-essay.

If you have used all the information from your table and the model which your teacher provided, you should have very little to improve in your mini-essay.

Context/
Understanding / Evidence/Quote / Analysis / Evaluation / PR / ‘line
of
thought’
‘It will blind you with tears
like a lover.’
‘It will make your reflection
a wobbling photo of grief.’
‘fierce kiss will stay on your lips,’
‘possessive and faithful,’
‘Its platinum loops shrink to a wedding-ring,’
‘Lethal.’
‘Its scent will cling to your fingers,
cling to your knife.’
Technical Accuracy
Topic Sentence
Full stops/capital letters used properly
Varied sentence structure
Quotes set out properly
Spelling correct
Linkage used eg In addition/furthermore/moreover/yet etc

Focus of Close Analysis

‘HowDuffy has conveyed, through structure, that her speaker/persona who offers the gift of an onion as a representation of their love for their partner, becomesincreasingly frustrated by their lover’s rejection of the gift and eventually adopts a threatening attitude.’

Pupil

‘Valentine’ by Carol Ann Duffy

In this section, we are going to examine ‘How Duffy has conveyed, through structure, that her speaker/persona who offers the gift of an onion as a representation of their love for their partner, becomes increasingly frustrated by their lover’s rejection of the gift and eventually adopts a threatening attitude.’

Structure

Duffy uses structure to show that her speaker/persona who offers the gift of an onion as a representation of their love for their partner, becomes increasingly frustrated by their lover’s rejection of the gift and eventually adopts a threatening attitude.’
Duffy has used FREE VERSE in this poem – there is no obvious rhyme scheme or rhythm.
The poem shows one side of a conversation.
Working with a partner, complete the table below.
Model your responses on the two that have been done for you.

Context/
Understanding / Evidence/Quote / Analysis/
Evaluation/
Personal Response
Central idea of the poem is the central line / ‘I am trying to be truthful.’ / Central line – very direct statement; attitude of speaker before this line is mainly positive/gentle; after, more brutal, threatening. Very personal – note use of first person ‘I’.
Speaker immediately dismisses conventional symbols of love and repeats this later in poem / ‘Not a red rose or a satin heart.’
‘Not a cute card or a kissogram.’ / First line – verbless sentence – direct statement – dismisses coventional symbols of love; note that the word ‘not’ starts each sentence so that there can be no doubt that the persona does not wish to show their feelings through overly sentimental conventional symbols. Repetition of similarly structured line reinforces speaker’s sincerity/desire to be truthful/candid. Entirely convincing – Valentines – materialistic/superficial – many people look for a different way to express devotion and the persona has done exactly that.
Speaker is insisting that lover will accept gift of an onion. the speaker is almost challenging the person she is talking to,
keeping the emotion controlled yet strongly connected with love: / ‘Here.’
‘Take it.’ / [cc9]Hint
The speaker, overwhelmed by the rejection of the gift, resorts to threatening, almost violent language / ‘Lethal.’ / [cc10]Hint
Powerful love is very difficult to forget and may lead you into dangerous situations where the final outcome may be brutal/ violent. / ‘Its scent will cling to your fingers,
cling to your knife.’ / [cc11]Hint

Mini-Essay

The following can be done in pairs, each pair taking one or two rows from the table:

Write your paragraphs and swap with another pair or group.
The other group should consider whether anything else can be added.
Use your notes from the template to help you.
Your mini-essay should show understanding (context), reference to the text (quote) and evaluative response (analysis and personal comment).

Examine the model below to see how you can structure and link your ideas in your response to the task above:-

Context/
Understanding / Duffy has chosen to place the central idea of the poem right in the middle of it. The speaker has dismissed conventional symbols of love in an effort to show their partner just how much love they feel for them. The speaker is very open and frank – they simply want to show their partner that there is no dishonesty in their feelings:
Evidence/Quote / ‘I am trying to be truthful.’
Analysis/Evaluation/ Personal Response / This line is a very direct statement – a simple sentence.Before this line the persona has spoken of their love in mainly gentle terms which shows the sincerity of their feelings. Yet, after this line, despite the sincerity of the sentiments previously expressed, the language of the speaker becomes more brutal, more threatening thus reinforcing the speaker’s truthfulness and integrity. By the use of the first person, Duffy conveys that the speaker feels very strongly that they want honesty in their relationship.

Peer Assessment

How did you get on? Working with a partner, use the checklist below to assess whether or not you have included all necessary information in your mini-essay.

If you have used all the information from your table and the model which your teacher provided, you should have very little to improve in your mini-essay.

Context/
Understanding / Evidence/Quote / Analysis / Evaluation / PR / ‘line
of
thought’
‘I am trying to be truthful.’
‘Not a red rose or a satin heart.’
‘Not a cute card or a kissogram.’
‘Here.’
‘Take it.’
‘Lethal.’
‘Its scent will cling to your fingers,
cling to your knife.’
Technical Accuracy
Topic Sentence
Full stops/capital letters used properly
Varied sentence structure
Quotes set out properly
Spelling correct
Linkage used eg In addition/furthermore/moreover/yet etc