Are you in an abusive or controlling relationship?

Psychological abuse

Criticise you, call you names
Tell you that you are stupid
Make fun of you
Blame you, make you feel guilty
Twist your words
Lie to you or deny what he’s done
Not let you go out where/when you want
Sulk
Ignore you, blank you, refuse to listen
Not let you speak, exclude you from conversations
Prevent your contact with family and friends
Make you account for every minute of your time
Accuse you of having affairs/other relationships
Withhold information
Deprive you of food or sleep
Tell you you’re mad
Threaten or attempt to commit suicide
Misuse, drugs or alcohol
‘Ogle’ other girls or women
Tell you to leave
Tell you what to wear
Not keep to agreements
Publicly humiliate you
Act like “Lord of the Manor”

Financial Abuse

Not negotiate how money is spent
Make you ask or beg for money
Give you an “allowance”
Make you account for every penny you spend
Withhold money, be secretive about income

Other Abuse

Get angry if you don’t want sex
Touch you sexually without permission
Spy on you, stalk you or check up on you
Use threats to obtain sex
Use pornography
Threaten to harm you
Threaten to harm other family members
Threaten you with weapons or objects
Threaten to kill you
Rip your clothes
Swear or scream in your face
Throw food or objects around
Smash up possessions
Drive fast or recklessly
Not leave when you ask him to
Stand over you, stop you leaving the room
Do degrading things to you, make you do them
Discuss your sexuality with others
Buy presents to convince you he’s sorry

Physical Abuse

Push, pull, trip you
Hold, grab, shake you
Slap, punch you
Bite you
Kick you
Pull your hair
Push you down stairs
Tie you up, lock you in
Burn or scald you
Twist your arm or leg
Bang your head
Choke or strangle you
Smother you or hold your head under water
Head butt you
Cut or slash you with a knife
Rape you
Hit you with a weapon or object
Set fire to belongings etc
Violence to friends or other family members
Violence to family pets