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Room Assembly 2016
Cast
Child 1 Reece
Child 2Sarah
Child 3Alex
Red Hiding Hood
Grandma Jesse
WolfTyra
Red Riding HoodKaelyn
The Karate Granny
GrandpaMolly O
Grandma Lachie
WolfElla
Red Riding HoodToby
Blue Driving HoodMiller
Cindy Goes to Town
Fairy God MotherBen
CindyJamie
PrinceKyan
Prince’s friendDenham
Ugly Step Sister 1Daniel
Ugly Step Sister 2Reece
Don’t Mess With My Mummy
Little Billy GruffAnnie
Medium Billy GruffTrinity
Troll 1 (child)Amalia
Troll 2 (mother)Kaysa
Troll 3 (sister)Abigail
Big Billy GruffKyan
Smelly Socks and the 3 Bears
Daddy BearSummer
Mummy BearBrooke
Baby BearMolly T
Jogger 1Travis
Jogger 2Jarvis
Alternative Fairy Stories
Child 1Hey, what you up to tonight?
Child 2Not much, probably watch some tv or something. There’s an awesome alternative version of the three little pigs on Channel 7 later called The Wolf Was Framed – the real story of the Three Little Pigs.
Child 1 The Real Story?
Child 3 Well, not all stories have to be traditional. Some stories are alternative, or different.
Child 2 Just like you mate…different!
Child 1I know what a traditional story is, it's something like Little Red Riding Hood or Cinderella, but what is an alternative story?
Child 3Well it's a modern version of an old story where lots of unexpected things can happen.
Child 1I'm still not sure what you mean.
Child 3The easiest way to explain is to show you. Here are two clips from Little Red Riding Hood. One is from the traditional story and the other is an alternative version. See if you can tell which is which.
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Little Red Riding Hood
GrandmaMy dear granddaughter, Little Red Riding Hood, should be here soon.
The wolf knocks on Grandma's door.
WolfHello Grandma, it's Little Red Riding Hood, I've brought you some cakes.
GrandmaOh do come in my dear, the door is unlocked.
The wolf enters.
WolfGrrr, grrr, grrr, grrr, grrr, grrr!!!
The wolf grabs Grandma and she falls to the floor.
GrandmaHelp! Help! Save me, save me, a vicious wolf is attacking me!
The wolf eats Grandma up and licks his lips.
WolfThat was a delicious meal. Now I'll dress up in Grandma's clothes and wait for Little Red Riding Hood.
The wolf puts on Grandma's clothes.
Red RHYoo-hoo Grandma, it's me, Little Red Riding Hood.
WolfDo come in my dear, I've been waiting for you.
Red RHOh Grandma, what big eyes you've got!
WolfAll the better for seeing you with my dear.
Red RHOh Grandma, what big ears you’ve got!
WolfAll the better for hearing your sweet voice my dear.
Red RHOh Grandma, what big teeth you’ve got!
Wolf All the better for chomping on you…my dear.
The wolf chases Little Red RH off stage.
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Child 2That was funny as.
Child 1 Yeah, that wolf played Little Red Like a boss.
Child 3Now watch version number two, it's called: "The Karate Granny".
The Karate Granny
Grandma is practicing karate kicks.
GrandpaI’m off to work now sweetie. Don’t you hurt yourself.
GrandmaOk love, have a great day.
Hiii yaaaa!!
The wolf knocks on the door.
WolfYoo-hoo Grandma, it's Little Red Riding Hood, I've brought you some cakes.
GrandmaJust a minute kid, while I unlock the door. Ya have to be careful these days, there are so many crazy people around.
The wolf rushes in and grabs Grandma's arm.
WolfGrrr, grrr, grrr, grrr, grrr; a nice juicy Grandma, just right for my supper.
GrandmaOh no ya don't - you old fleabag!
Take that! (chop) and that (chop) and that (chop).
Wolf falls unconscious to the floor.
Well that taught him a lesson. No one messes with Grandma Hood.
Grandma drags the wolf off stage.
Little Red Riding Hood comes rushing in.
Red RHGrandma what's going on? I heard growling it sounded as though there was a fight going on. Are you all right?
Blue DHYeah Granma, it sounds like a UFC battle in there.
GrandmaDon't worry kid, I've just been making myself a new fur coat.
Grandma goes off stage and puts on a fur coat and comes on again.
What do you think of it then?
Red RHGrandma, you're amazing!
Blue DHShe’s one in a million our Granma.
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Child 2Oh, now I see what you mean. Instead of Grandma being the stereotypical sweet Grandma, she's tough and can do karate.
Child 1These alternative stories are fun, do you know any more?
Child 3Yes I do. This one's called "Cindy goes to Town", see if you can tell which fairy tale this story comes from.
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Cindy Goes to Town
CindyBoo-hoo, boo-hoo, I'm so miserable! My stepsisters are going to the party at the palace tonight and I can't go because I've got nothing to wear.
Fairy Godmother enters.
Fairy GMDon't cry Cindy, of course you can go to the party.
CindyWho are you?
Fairy GMI'm your fairy Godmother. Now go and fetch me a pumpkin and I'll turn it into a beautiful coach.
Cindy searches and returns with a banana.
CindyOh dear all I can find is this banana, will it do instead?
Fairy GMMmmm, well I'll see what I can do ……………. Abracabanana!!! Now go outside and look.
Cindy returns with a motor bike.
CindyWow, this is great, I've always wanted a motor bike. It's much better than a
soppy old coach.
Fairy GMI'm glad you like it. Now let's do something about those tatty clothes…………
Abracadabra, alacazam!!
Cindy changes clothes behind screen.
CindyThis is perfect for the palace party, thank you so much. I must be going now or I'll be late. Bye.
Cindy rides off and Fairy Godmother leaves stage.
Later - the clock strikes ten. Cindy comes on followed by the Prince.
PrinceCindy, come back! Why are you leaving so early, it's only 10 o'clock.
Prince’s FShe’s a total babe my prince. Don’t let that one go.
PrinceI agree, I’ll do my best. Cindy, come back………….
CindyThis is the most boring party I've ever been to.
PrinceBut Cindy, I want to marry you. You could become a princess.
CindyI don't want to be a princess, I want to have some fun. I'm going to the Diamond Club to meet my friends. Bye eeeeeee.
Cindy rides off.
Prince(Sighs and shrugs). Maybe life was better as a frog!
Ugly SS 1You who, handsome prince! We are still here.
Ugly SS 2Hello sexy, how about a kiss?
He’s so cute! I could just kiss him all over.
Ugly SS 1Like totally!
Prince Like I said, I’d rather be a frog. (pretends to be sick). Yuck!
Prince leaves stage.
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Child 3So, can you tell which fairy story that clip was from?
Child 1Ummm, that’s a tough one.
Child 2Of course, "Cinderella", that was easy as.
Child 3Let's see if you can guess this one, it's called: "Don't Mess with My Mummy"
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Don't Mess with my Mummy!
Little BGListen you guys, I'm tired of eating these dried weeds. I'm going over the bridge to try out the juicy, green grass in Safa Park.
Med. BGOkay, but take care; watch out for the troll.
Little Billy Goat walks onto the bridge.
Troll 1STOP!!! Whoever's walking over my bridge is about to be gobbled up.
Little BGOh you don't want to bother eating little old me, I'm such a skinny wimp. Why don't you wait for my big brother who will be coming this way soon?
Troll 1Okay, I'll let you go, you are rather puny looking.
Little Billy Goat walks across the bridge.
Medium Billy Goat walks onto the bridge.
Troll 1STOP!!! Whoever's walking over my bridge is about to be gobbled up.
Med. BGOh you don't want to bother eating little old me, I'm such a skinny wimp. Why don't you wait for my big brother who will be coming this way soon?
Troll 1Okay, okay, you've persuaded me, off you go. Your big brother had better make a good meal though.
Medium Billy Goat Gruff walks across the bridge.
Big Billy Goat Gruff walks onto the bridge.
STOP!!! Whoever's walking over my bridge is about to be gobbled up.
Big BGI am Big Billy Goat Gruff, the roughest, toughest, meanest goat in town. You'd better watch out you big, ugly, wart faced troll.
Big Billy Goat puts his head down ready to charge.
Troll 1Oh help!
Troll 2Who's calling my lickle wickle baby a big, ugly, wart faced troll?
Troll 3What’s up bro? Everything cool?
Big BGEr……………… what the? (Points behind)
Troll 2We don't like people who call each other nasty names do we dear?
Troll 1No we don't mummy.
Troll 3We certainly don’t. You’re in for a whole lot of pain.
Troll 2MMM, I'm afraid we are going to have to EAT YOU!
All three trolls grab Big Billy Goat and take him away to eat.
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Child 3So, can you tell which fairy story that clip was from?
Child 1Easy-peasy, it was "The Three Billy Goats Gruff". I wasn't expecting to meet an extra troll in the story though.
Child 2Yeah, that ending freaked me out a little. What’s with the 3 trolls instead of 1?
Child 3That's the fun thing about alternative fairy stories, anything can happen. Watch what happens next in: "Smellysocks and the Three Bears".
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Smellysocks and the Three Bears
Daddy Bear and Baby Bear are sitting at the table.
Daddy BHave you made us some yummy porridge for breakfast this morning dear?
Mummy BNo. It's Friday morning and I'm not in the mood for cooking. Let's go to Macca’s for a McMuffin and hash brown.
Baby BOh yes, yes, that sounds like a good idea, let's go.
Bears go off to Macca’s.
Two joggers are jogging around the woods - they stop outside a cottage.
Jogger 1Let's stop for a rest, my feet are killing me dude.
Jogger 2But we've only been running for 2 minutes man.
Jogger 1At least let's ask the people at this cottage to fill up our water bottles dude.
Jogger 2Okay man.
(Knocks on the door)
Maybe they can't hear us, let's go inside man. Hello, is there anyone at home?
Jogger 1There's no one home dude. I'm sure they won't mind if we have a drink dude.
Jogger 2My feet are killing me man. I'll just take my sneakers off okay man.
Jogger 1 Me too dude. (Take sneaker off) Ahhh, that feels better dude.
Jogger 2Pooh, your feet stink man.
Jogger 1No they don't, it's your feet that stink dude!
Jogger 2(Yawns) I'm tiredman, let's go and watch TV for a while man.
Jogger 1Okay dude.
They go into the other room.
The three bears return home.
Daddy B(Sniffs) What's that awful smell?
Mummy BIt's terrible, what on earth could it be?
Baby BCould it be this? (Holds up a trainer).
Hey look, someone's been drinking our orange juice.
Mummy BLet's investigate, all we have to do is follow the smell.
They go to the TV room.
Daddy BAh ha! This is where the smell is coming from. Hey you two.
Joggers wake up, scream and run away.
Baby B(Shrugs) Well they may have had smelly feet but at least they didn't smash the house up like that horrible girl Goldilocks.
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Child 3So you guys get it now, stories can be traditional or alternative.
Child 2All these alternative stories are great but whatever happened to the fairy tale of the Dockers winning the AFL Premiership?
Child 1Well, that’s a tale for another day.
Finish
Ugly Step Sister 1Well, well, well what do we have here?
Ugly Step Sister 2 Anyone you think is sexy and want to kiss?
Ugly Step Sister 1 MMM, there are a few sexy ones that’s for sure.
Ugly Step Sister 2 Anyway, we are really here to thank the audience for being so attentive and ask them to listen to their awesome teachers.
Ugly Step Sister 1 That’s right! Well, mmmway (kiss the crowd). Have a great day and
BothThanks very much for watching!