Make Mums day ideas

Celebrate being a family

Yes, being a mum is tough – but can you think of a better thing to be than a mum? The only thing I can think of is being a grandmother! And that has to follow the first. There are only a few special people in this world who can call you mum, and once you are a mum, that’s it for life.

The challenges don’t stop, it’s a job that never finishes, we are always looking for answers to tough questions, we will always wish we had a magic wand to wave, we will always wish we were better at the mothering job – but when you have time to look back, when the children are sleeping and you are not totally exhausted, know that you are a special person who is helping to develop wonderful young people – and enjoy!

Anthea Donaldson

A tip from the day that didn’t seem to fit anywhere but here:

Have family get togethers when you all sit down to eat together – could be weekly, but maybe we won’t all manage that. At this time, have “good news minute” when everyone has a turn to share.

Managing TV and Computer time

· No TV or computer in children’s bedrooms

· Restrict TV time

· Plan what to watch on TV – don’t just turn it on

· Using a timer to shut down the computer after the allocated time

· Taking the iPad away

· Have rules about use of technology

· Supervise use of computer

· One group identified times of between 30 – 90 minutes a day for children between 4-14 yrs.

· Have children take turns on computer

· Promote other healthy activities like going to the park, bike riding…

· Homework first, then games (computer)

· No homework -> no TV

· Spend time with your children (on computer/ watching TV?)

· Choose educational programs, Apps

· Divide time between watching TV, computer, playing, studying.

· Try to avoid watching TV and using the computer while children are at home (adults?)

· Organise playtime with friends

· Plan outside activities

· Parents set the example – try a no technology day for the whole family (or at reduced?!)

· Encourage / appreciate / reward children for doing things not involving technology

· To share the computer, have book where they “book” a ½ hour time slot. Homework has preference over games.

Working too many hours / lack of time

· Share chores in the family

· Negotiate with boss some flexibility in working hours.

· Make time to rest – have some “me time” during the week.

· Family planning

· Do a timetable for home

· Talk to children about the week ahead

· Have messages on a calendar on the phone

· Be organised, have routines

· Delegate jobs to family members

· Work as a team

· Prioritise

· Make the children independent. (Let them!)

· Have family fun time.

· Get support from extended family / friends eg tag team drop off and pick up.

· Try to work school hours

· Be flexible

· Organise a “walking bus” to get children to and from school.

Issues between husbands and wives

· Don’t interfere when one parent is disciplining a child.

· Homework should be shared between husband and wife.

· Honesty between partners

· Listening objectively.

· Be responsible and take the initiative to help out.

· In front of children parents show united agreement about issues – if they don’t agree, discuss this in private away from the children.

· Make time once a week with partner to discuss children and their issues.

Household chores

· Share between partners.

· Take individual responsibility for things

· Assign tasks to children.

· Go on strike to make family realise what you do!

Conflict between children/sibling rivalry

· Try to let them sort it out themselves – give advice if needed.

· If they want to remain silent, let them

· Don’t engage in their anger by getting angry too.

· Allow children to express anger as long as it is safe. Ie: It is OK to be angry about something, but it is not OK to hurt or abuse someone when you are angry.

· Talk to children when they (and you) have cooled down.

· Try to distract them from conflict situation

· Involve grandparents

· Reason with eldest child

· Remove the item causing the problem

· Explain

· Distract

· Separate

· Create joint activity – where they have to learn to cooperate

· Explore the issue

· Time out

· Take arguments outside

· If a child is hurt in conflict, the uninjured one becomes the “slave” to help the injured child.

· Conflict at school –

o talk to children

o know their friends

o talk to teachers

o get children involved in sport – teaches them strategies

Guilt (over working?)

· Have “me time”

· Keep up good communication with children

· Have a set time to spend with children

· Be at their level and show it.

· Apologise

· Decide what is important and what can wait

· Give time to children and do your stuff once they are in bed

· Involve child in what you need to do, like preparing dinner

Food issues

· Vegetarian food should be available everywhere so that working women can find it easily (maybe we need to share ideas…)

· Try to explain to your child the dark side of junk food.

· Provide guidance on eating healthy food.

· Have “sometimes” food for treats, not every day.

· Cook healthy snacks with children at the weekend for recesses.

· Just say NO to junk food and put up with the tantrum (won’t go on forever!)

Looking after yourself

· Take a shower

· Have coffee with friends

· Talk to family

· Take time to look good

· Go shopping

· Anything on the 85 presents list!

· Communicate with other mums at school, make friends

· Learn to say NO!