Four old men, sitting on the porch in their rocking chairs, reminiscing about days gone by.
The first man asks the second man:
“Did ya ever sleep with a blonde? I mean a real blonde?”
“Yeah,” he chuckles, “yeah, I sure did.”
Some time passes and then he asks the third man:
“Did you ever sleep with a black haired gal? A true natural jet-black haired gal?”
“Yep,” is the reply, “I sure did. Hmmmm. Yep. Sure did.”
A bit of time passes. Finally, he says to the fourth one:
“Have you ever slept with a redhead? A true-born redhead?”
Some more time passes, and finally the fourth man replies:
“Nope. Not a wink.”
(courtesy of Dean what-a-wit Chamberlain:
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Two friends, a blonde and a redhead, are walking down the street and pass a flower shop where the redhead happens to see her boyfriend buying flowers.
She sighs and says, “Oh, crap, my boyfriend is buying me flowers again....for no reason.”
The blonde looks at her quizzically and says, “What's wrong with that, don’t you like getting flowers?”
The red head says, “Oh sure.....but he always has expectations after giving me flowers
and I just don’t feel like spending the next three days on my back with my legs in the air.”
The blonde says: “Don’t you have a vase?”
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A lawyer and a redhead are sitting next to each other on a long flight from LA
to NY. The lawyer leans over to her and asks if she would like to play a fun game.
The girl just wants to take a nap, so she politely declines and rolls over to the window to catch a few winks.The lawyer persists and explains that the game is really easy and a lot of fun. He explains: “I ask you a question, and if you don’t know the answer you pay me $5, and visa-versa.”
Again, she politely declines and tries to get some sleep. The lawyer, now rather insistent, says, “Okay, if you don't know the answer you pay me $5 and if I don’t know the answer, I will pay you $50,” figuring that since she is a redhead he will easily win the match.
This catches the redhead’s attention and, figuring that there will be no end to this torment unless she plays, agrees to the game. The lawyer asks the first question: “What’s the distance from the earth to the moon?”
The redhead doesn’t say a word, reaches into her purse, pulls out a five-dollar bill and hands it to the lawyer. Now, it’s her turn. She asks the lawyer:
“What goes up a hill with three legs, and comes down with four?”
The lawyer looks at her with a puzzled look. He takes out his laptop computer and searches all his references. He taps into the Airphone with his modem and searches the Net and the Library of Congress. Frustrated, he sends emails to all his coworkers and friends he knows. All to no avail. After over an hour, he wakes the redhead and hands her $50. She politely takes the $50 and turns away to get back to sleep.
But the lawyer, who is now more than a little miffed, wakes her up and asks:
“Well, so what is the answer!?”
Without a word, she reaches into her purse, hands the lawyer $5, and goes back to sleep.
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... more to come – contributions welcome!!
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