Farmer and the Chicken
"THE FARMER AND THE CHICKEN" by Kirk Henneberry
CHARACTERS
· One clown will be the farmer.
· All other clowns will be all other characters simultaneously.
STAGING
· Between scenes, all characters stand with their backs to audience.
(The farmer turns around like he is going to do some work in his garden)
Farmer: (In a country voice) "I'm a farmer from (name of your home town) and it's such a nice day, I think I'll do some work in my garden. Now where did I leave my hoe... Oh, there it is."
(Farmer picks up imaginary hoe and starts working in his imaginary garden)
Chickens: (Turn around start acting like chickens; flap their wings, arms & hands tucked under armpits, walking pigeon toed with toes scratching the ground,bobbing heads & cackling.)
Farmer: (A little startled) "Hey, who do you think you are?"
Chickens: "Why we are chickens."
Farmer: What makes you think you are chickens?"
Chickens: "Why we've been in the chicken coop three whole weeks!"
Farmer: "Well, just because you've been in the chicken coop three whole weeks,doesn't make you chickens."
Chickens: (Instantly freeze as reality hit & reluctantly say)"It doesn't?"
Farmer: "Why no!"
Chickens: (Drop all chicken characteristics & depressingly say) "No wonder wecouldn't lay any eggs." (chickens get back in line)
Farmer: "What's this world coming to anyway. Look at my garden. Now I reallyneed to work on this place. Now where did I leave my hoe?" (He finds his hoe &starts to work again)
Train: (Turn around from the line with the shorter person in front & every otherperson holding on to the others elbows of the one in front of him. The train doesvarious chug' chug' & whistling sounds)
Farmer: "Who do you think you are?"
Train: "Why we're a Train." (Still in character of train)
Farmer: What makes you think you’re a train?
Train: "We've been in the train depot for two months!"
Farmer: No it doesn't, just because you've been in the train depot for two monthsdoesn't make you a Train."
Train: (Instantly freeze as reality hits & spokesman says,) "It doesn't!?"
Farmer: "No"
Train: "No wonder we couldn't get on the right track." "No wonder we couldn't get on the right track." (All drop Train Characterizations & get back in line.)
Farmer: "No wonder we couldn't get on the right track." "No wonder we couldn't get on the right track." (All drop Train Characterizations & get back in line.)
Airplanes: (Turn around from the line with arms & hands fully extended making engine noise & circles around the farmer two times. One ends up on either side of the farmer & slows down to idol position still sounding like an idling engine)
Farmer: (Drops his imaginary shovel & ducks down in excitement of the planes)
"Hey stop it, cool it, come on, settle down...... Hey, who do your think you are?"
Airplanes: "Why we're airplanes."
Farmer: "Airplanes, what makes you think you're airplanes?"
Airplanes: "We've been in the airplane hanger for two years!"
Farmer: "Just because you've been in the airplane hanger for two years, thatdoesn't make you an airplane."
Airplanes: (Freezes & stops motor noises) "It doesn't?"
Farmer: "No!"
Airplanes: (Drop Arms) "No wonder we couldn't get off the ground."
Farmer: "Oh, look what's happened to my garden. It's completely ruined! I guessI might as well dig it up for next year."
Christians: (Turns around from the line with hands folded together & says with a
very pious voice) "Amen, Amen, Amen."
Farmer: (Looks up from his work with a searching gaze & ask) "Who do you think
you are?"
Christians: "Why we’re Christians!"
Farmer: "What makes you think you're Christians?"
Christians: "I'm an American; I go to church twice a year, on Christmas & Easter,
& I give to charitable organizations. That's what makes me a Christian."
Farmer: "Just because you are an American, go to church on Christmas & Easter,
& give to charitable organizations, all that doesn't make you a Christian."
Christian: (Bewildered) "It doesn't!?"
Farmer: "No, all those things are good to do, but to be a real Christian you need to have a personal relationship with Jesus Christ. You need to repent of your sins & ask Jesus into your heart. Come on, Ma has some vittles on the griddle. We can go up to the house & talk some more about it." (Start walking toward the line) "You see God loved you so much that He gave His only Son …"
Proceed with invitation to receive Christ. Lead in Sinner’s Prayer.