The Purpose of the Leader’s Guide
This Leader’s Guide was designed to be used in a group that is viewing the DVD’s of the Freedom From Addictive Behaviors Conference. The purpose is to present the truth that sets you free and discuss how they can appropriate that truthin their lives. For many long years I struggled with the bondage of addiction. I tried everything I knew of and what anyone suggested -- all to no avail. I was fifty-one years old and had been a Christian for 18 years before I found my freedom. I was also a seminary graduate and a former pastor. Since I discovered the truth that sets you free in 1988, it has been my privilege to share it with others.
Jesus said “Then you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free."
(John 8:32). I had mistakenly believed that freedom was something I had to strive
to attain. I didn’t know that it was part of the package when I became a Christian.
I didn’t know freedom was my birthright as a child of God and my rightful inheritance. I find that most of the people struggling with addictive behavior don’t understand this truth either. These messages presented and these discussion questions are designed to point the person to Christ, who said,"If the Son sets
you free, then you are free indeed” (John 8:36).
The purpose is to drive home the fact that “truth sets you free” and that all
of our sincere efforts will not do it. My desire is to point the person to Christ who
has done everything necessary for us to be free and live in peace and joy.
My prayer for you and the ones who participate in this is “that the God of our Lord Jesus Christ, the glorious Father, may give you the Spirit of wisdom and revelation, so that you may know him better. I pray also that the eyes of your heart may be enlightened in order that you may know the hope to which he has called you, the riches of his glorious inheritance in the saints, and his incomparably great power for us who believe.” (Ephesians 1:17-19).
Mike Quarles
Director of Grace Walk Recovery Ministry
Discussion Questions for the Following Messages
#1 The Strange Odyssey of A Legalistic Preacher Who Became A Drunk, Discovered Grace andWas Set Free -- Mike Quarles testimony of how he found freedom from the bondage of addictive behavior.
#2 How A Wife Found Her Freedom by Facing Her Husband’s Alcoholism -- Julia Quarles testimony of how she found freedom from the addictive behavior of codependency and performance-based acceptance.
#3 The Problem Of Addiction -- A Biblical understanding of the problem of addictive behaviors so that we can lay a proper foundation for recovery.
#4 The Price For Freedom -- The requirement for experiencing freedom and why so few are experiencing it.
#5 God’s Answer For Addiction -- Understanding God’s clear, definitive and complete answer for addictive behavior is freedom in Christ
#6 Strongholds Of Addiction -- The lies we believe that keep us in the bondage of addictive behaviors
#7 Forgiveness Your #1 Ticket to Freedom -- The hardest and most liberating thing that you will ever do is to forgive from the heart.
#8 How To Walk Free And Stay Free -- How to walk in freedom by renewing your mind and win the battle for the mind.
#9 The Basics of Recovery to Freedom In Christ -- A summary of the truth that sets you free and keeps you free.
Presented by Mike And Julia Quarles
Mike and Julia Quarles are on staff with Grace Walk Ministries and are the Directors of the Grace Walk Recovery Ministry. They teach the Freedom From Addictive Behaviors Conference. Mike is a former pastor and a graduate of Reformed Theological Seminary. After leaving the pastorate and returning to business, he struggled with alcoholism for eight years. He has served as a counselor with Grace Ministries International in Atlanta. Prior to coming with Grace Walk Ministries, Mike and Julia served as the Directors of the Freedom in Christ Recovery Ministry for 12 years. Mike and Julia are the parents of three grown children and have seven grandchildren. They live in Roswell, Georgia.
Mike and Julia have written a book with Dr. Neil Anderson, Freedom From Addiction, in which Mike tells how he finally found his freedom and Julia, tells how she found her freedom from codependency. Also with Dr. Anderson they wrote a Freedom From Addiction Workbook. It takes you through an intensive personal appraisal to show you the lies you believe that are keeping you in bondage and contains an in-depth inductive Bible study that shows you the truth that sets you free. A Freedom From Addiction Video Seminaris also available that introduces each session of the Workbook. OneDay at a Time is a devotional for overcomers coauthored with Dr. Anderson.
In 2012 Harvest House published Mike Quarles and Steve McVey’s book on Helping Others Overcome Addictions. Part 1 tells how to help others who are struggling with addictions with information on codependency and Part 2 lays out steps, guidelines and principles for setting up a recovery ministry where people find true and lasting freedom in Christ.
How to Use This Leader’s Guide
There are ten discussion questions for each message presented on the Freedom from Addictive Behaviors Conference. After viewing the message, the leader should begin by asking the first question. There are two types of questions. One is a question that is based on the message just viewed. There is really only one correct answer, but there may be other facets and different ways of framing the answer. To make sure that you do not stray too far, there is a KEY after each one of these questions. This is for you to help bring them back to the truth if they get off track and it can be used for a summary after the discussion winds down.
The other question is an open question and has no correct answer as it calls for the person’s opinion. The open questions can be recognized, as they do not have a KEY after them. These questions could stimulate the most discussion, but you may need to remind the group from time to time that the purpose is not to air their opinions, and/or discuss their problems but to get at the truth that sets free and discover what God says.
Each member of the group should have a Freedom from Addictive Behaviors Conference Manual which is basically an outline of the message to follow along during the message. The Conference Manual can be downloaded for free at
It is really fairly simple. Your biggest challenge will be to keep them on track and help them get to the truth that is presented.
Guidelines in Leading the Group Discussion
1. Keep in mind that though the truth does set you free, some will be living in such deception that they will need someone to help them deal with their issues so they can believe and appropriate the truth. If they need counseling you can go to aelm.org and click on members that offer Christ-centered counseling. We also have a list of Christian Treatment Centers for substance abuse.
2. Don’t let one person dominate. Always point them back to the truth that is presented. You may need to say, “Let’s give others a chance to share also”. If you need to, you could meet with them individually between meetings.
3. Don’t be afraid to confront people with the truth. We should always “speak the truth in love”.
4. Ask some in the group to look up the Scripture references and the quotes from the Conference Manual and read them.
5. If one of the group seems reluctant to participate, ask them “What do you think?” on one of the open questions. However if they are unwilling to participate, don’t push them.
6. This is primarily the first step in a study that Grace Walk Recovery Ministry has designed for those who desire to be free from addictive behavior. Other resources include the Freedom From Addiction book, the Freedom From Addiction Workbook, the Freedom From Addiction Video Seminar and the One Day at a Time Devotional for those who are serious and want to go deeper.
7. Don’t focus on the problem. Focus on the solution. Don’t allow people to spend too much time on their problems. Remind them they are there to find the truth that sets free.
Session #1 The Strange Odyssey of a Legalistic Preacher
Who Became a Drunk, Discovered Grace and Was Set Free
Goals of Session
(1) To show the devastating effects of addiction
(2) To give a practical illustration of how programs and methods will not set you free
(3) To give a personal example of how knowing and believing the truth will set you free
Discussion Questions
1. Why couldn’t Mike answer the policeman’s question, “Why do you do it?”
KEY - Addiction is bondage and he is unable to stop doing it on his own.
2. What did alcohol do for Mike?
KEY - It did something for him that nothing else had been able to do. The
primary things it did for him were: a. It enabled him to overcome his self- consciousness, b. Escape pain and stress and c. Feel better about himself.
3. What did your addiction do for you that nothing else had been able to do?
4. Why did Mike turn back to alcohol after leaving the pastorate even though he was a Christian?
KEY - He had never learned to look to God to meet his needs for acceptance and
worth and didn’t know who he was in Christ and he saw himself as a total failure.
5. Why didn’t any of the 30 things work that Mike tried ?
KEY - He was depending on what He did (programs, methods, steps, etc.) and was operating in the flesh and only Christ can set you free ( see John 8:36).
6. What good things have you tried in the past that didn’t bring you freedom because you were
depending on what you did (doing your best, trying hard, etc.)?
7. Is it possible that you, like Mike, have struggled because your theology (your beliefs about
yourself, God and life) are wrong? (See John 8:32).
8. What was the truth that set Mike free?
KEY - Romans 6:6,7 - The old sin-loving sinner had been crucified. We are now new creations who have died to sin, are freed from it and alive to God- See 2 Cor: 5:17.
9. Mike says there is only one thing that keeps you in bondage and only one thing that sets
you free. What are they?
KEY - Lies keep you in bondage and truth sets you free.
10. What are some lies you have believed about yourself that have kept you in bondage?
Session #2 - How a Wife Found Her Freedom by Facing Her Husband’s Addiction -
Julia’s Testimony
GOALS - (1) To understand that the same truth that sets you free from addiction sets you free from codependency and all addictive behavior. (2) To understand how to relate to someone struggling with addiction in a loving and redemptive way. (3) To understand that the main issue
in life is your relationship with Christ, not your relationship with another person.
1. Why was it so difficult for Julia to take a stand and not tolerate sin and ungodly behavior?
NOTE - Only one woman in ten will leave a husband who has addictive behavior.
KEY - Codependency is trying to get your needs met through another person and how
they respond to you by what they say or do. She was looking to Mike to get her basic needs met.
2. What was the most loving and redemptive thing Julia did during Mike’s addiction?
KEY - She finally took a stand and kicked him out of the house.
3. How was Julia able to reach out in love to Mike after all the hurt he had done to her?
KEY - By faith. She didn’t feel like it, but she trusted God and reached out (see Phil. 2:13).
4. What truth did Julia learn that enabled her to be free in Christ?
KEY - Her identity in Christ.
5. What do you think were the most important truths that Julia learned about God, herself
and life?
KEY - She had worth and value because she is in Christ -- God doesn’t require a wife to put up with sinful behavior -- Sometimes love must be tough and say no -- Taking on someone else responsibility only fosters more irresponsibility -- Only God can change someone else -- The past is past, but the pain from it can only be dealt with through forgiveness -- We’re unconditionally loved and accepted by God and do not have to perform for His love and acceptance.
6. What did Julia accomplish in all her sincere efforts to change her husband?
KEY - Nothing, in fact it was counter-productive.
7. Why was Julia’s goal to have a happy home and marriage not good and led to unhappiness? KEY - A goal is not a good or achievable if it depends on someone else. Goals should only
involve ourselves to be achieved. Our main goal is to know Christ and abide in him.
8. Julia said that she knew Christ had died for her sins, but she learned something else that
happened at the cross that changed her life and enabled her to find freedom. What was it?
KEY-That she died with Christ and died to sin and was now free from sin (see Rom. 6:6, 7).
9. Julia learned that Christ didn’t want to strengthen and improve her flesh and change her life,
but He wanted to do what?
KEY - To exchange her life with Christ’s life so she could trust Him to live His life
through her. To understand that Christ was her life.
10. How do you think knowing your identity in Christ and that you have died to sin and are freed
from it can enable you to be free of whatever your struggle is?
Session #3 - The Problem of Addiction
GOALS - (1) To gain a biblical perspective of addiction and to learn what it is. (2) To understand how addiction develops. (3) To understand why addiction is so difficult to break.
1. What is addiction?
KEY - Addiction is spiritual bondage (see Prov. 23:29-35; 2 Pet. 2:19 and page 9
FIC Manual).
2. Addiction develops from what two basic God-given needs that we have?
KEY - Acceptance (love, security, and belonging) and Worth (value, significance, importance).
3. What does the Bible call it when we try to meet our needs in our own resources, independent
of God?
KEY - Flesh (the self-life) (See page 8 FIC Manual).
4. Mike believed that he was insecure, inadequate, inferior and guilty. What have you believed
about yourself that has helped keep you in bondage to your addiction?
5. Mike gave an example of a pro baseball player as an example of how flesh patterns operate.
Can you think of any more examples?
6. What do you do that makes you feel better about yourself (such as making money, performing
well, looking good, having new clothes, being in a relationship) etc.?
7. How do you protect and defend yourself: succeed, cope, deal with problems and failure,
and escape?
8. What is the biggest reason that addiction is so difficult to break?
KEY - It is connected to how we find life and identity (that is how we meet our needs for
love/acceptance and worth/value).
9. What does Oswald Chambers say is Satan’s counterfeit for the fullness of the Holy Spirit?
KEY - Drunkenness, high on drugs and the sexual experience (See Eph. 5:18).
10. What is the essence of addiction? What would be the answer for that?
KEY - The essence of addiction is self-consciousness and the answer is God-consciousness. That is understanding who God is, how much He loves you, what He has done for you, who you are in Christ, that you are dead to sin and alive to God, and Christ lives in you and is your life.
Session #4 - The Price For Freedom
GOALS - (1) To understand why so few people get free from addiction. (2) To understand what
the price for freedom is. (3) To understand how our basic inclination works against our finding freedom.
1. According to Mike’s teaching on John 5, what are most people depending on to get free?
KEY - Another person (counseling) and/or an experience (program, treatment,
spiritual zap).
2. What have you depended on in the past?
3. What does Mike say are the three conditions of freedom?
KEY- 1) Desire above all else, not to stop, but to get right with God. 2) Desperation- give up on self and everything else. 3) Depend on Christ alone, not Christ plus a program, 12 Steps, etc.