The Secret to Your Success

Part One

Your Letter of Commitment

Michael Lovas, C.Ht.

[Jeff – this section is just the teaser]

Teaser:

Question: I’ve worked with a coach for more than a year, but can’t seem to make any more money than I did before. What am I doing wrong?

Question: I read all the new books on self-help and sales, but I don’t make any more money, and I’m not any happier. What gives?

Answer: Those two questions epitomize a problem that nearly every person in business experiences. Can you relate to them? Want to know the solution? Click here

[Jeff – please insert the link to the article here]

Question: I’ve worked with a coach for more than a year, but can’t seem to make any more money than I did before. What am I doing wrong?

Question: I read all the new books on self-help and sales, but I don’t make any more money. What gives?

Answer: Those two questions voice a problem that nearly every advisor experiences. Simply, the benefits from coaching and reading excellent books bounce off you like sauce on Teflon. Here’s the essence of why most people can’t get the pay off from their effort.

  • Very few of the self-development or life-strategies coaches I know of have a background in sales. While they may be able to guide you through some self-development processes, they’re not logical choices to help you improve your business.
  • Very few of the sales coaches I know of have a background in self-development. If you need to get past self-defeating tapes or painful memories, your sales coach is probably the last person to trust for that.

The missing ingredient in both of those situations is options. Anyone can learn a system and follow a set of processes. Anyone can learn and ask a list of questions. However, what happens when the system doesn’t solve the problem? That requires other options, other approaches, other techniques. And, those require a lot of training and experience.

Think of this like your vocabulary. Even if you know many words that are multisyllabic, that doesn’t mean you force them into inappropriate situations. Rather, if your lexicon is that capacious, it means you possess more options. In other words, you review your options and then break out the right words for the right situations. Coaches should possess skills and training broad enough to afford them greater options to help you when standard approaches fail.

Enough about coaches. Let’s look at how you can get help fast.

When people come to me for help to increase sales or get past an emotional problem, I ask some intriguing questions. My purpose here is two-fold.

First, I want to learn some information about you. I look for patterns in your behavior and language. I look for inconsistencies in the patterns. And, I make sense of the inconsistencies. This way, I develop an understanding of how and why you see things like you do and behave like you do.

Second, I want to gauge your level of commitment. If you simply “try” to improve, you’ll fail – probably every time. If you intend to learn about improving, rather than actually improve, you’ll fail – probably every time. So, the message here is to pick your battle and fight to the death to achieve your victory. Make the commitment - that’s how you improve. Sounds simple, doesn’t it? The idea is simple. The application can be daunting if you’re by yourself.

Let’s look at the questions. And, if you want to improve your life and your business, answer the questions!

First question: Who are you? Most people tell me about their career. Wrong. That’s what you do – not who you are. Other people tell me about their families. Wrong. That’s not who you are.

Want to improve? Get a piece of paper and write your own answer to that question: who are you? There is a follow-up to that question – who do other people think you are? If those two are not the same, then, whoa boy, you’re in trouble. Many people in sales try to be whatever the prospect wants them to be. That’s called “tap dancing.” And, the name we assign to tap dancers is, “Genuine Simulated.” It means your life lacks congruence and continuity; it’s out of synch, and that is a formula for heartache and frustration.

If you’re a tap dancer, other people see right through your inconsistency. No matter what words you use, your nonverbal cues shout the truth at them. Research in unconscious perception shows that when your words don’t match your nonverbal cues, the other person almost always trusts the nonverbals.

Second question: What do you want? Most people tell me that they want to make more sales. Wrong. Making sales is part of a process, and a process can’t be a goal because the process never ends. What do you want to be right now? What quality do you want to possess right now?

The other wrong answer to this question is, “I don’t know.” Obviously, if you don’t know what you want, you’ll probably get something you don’t want. Isn’t that what you have right now? Or as Yogi Berra said, “If you don’t know where you’re going, you could end up someplace else.”

Now, did you get out a piece of paper and answer the questions? If not, you might as well stop reading now because you’re not going to get any benefit from this article by merely reading it. Reading rather than doing might be a pattern in your behavior. People who read and don’t do are what we call “dissociated.” They’re disconnected from significant parts (or all) of life. It’s like they’re standing on the side of the road watching the rest of the world parade by but never getting on the road themselves. That, my friend, is a formula for failure.

So, make a little commitment; take a little action – get a piece of paper and write your answers. In a way, it doesn’t matter what you write. The important thing is to do it. That could be your first step to great rewards!

Every formula for success includes this basic and essential element: Commitment! And commitment requires you to answer these questions:

1)Who are you

2)What do you want?

3)What’s the most important thing about you? And, how to you know?

4)As for what you want – have you ever had it? If not, how will you recognize it when you finally get it?

5)Use your right arm as an indicator. On a scale of 1-5, how committed are you to get what you want? How do you know? And, can you convince anyone else?

Now, it’s time to put your commitment to the first test. Get out a second piece of paper and write your Letter of Commitment. Your Letter of Commitment contains three elements and as many as ten statements.

1)Your contract to be. This is your statement of the kind of person you are capable of being. This is your statement of the you that you aspire to be on a day-by-day basis. It’s the statement of who you are that you need to stretch to live up to. Who are you? It’s the person you want to be at the end of today. Who are you? Are you a strong person? A committed person? A worthy person? A loving person? An honest person? How can you prove it?

2)Your contract to do. This is your announcement to the world of what people can trust you to do. This is your statement of what you are capable of doing. Do you focus on your goals? If not, don’t say you do – it would be a lie. Do you focus on discovering who you are? If so, say that. This isn’t a list of the skills you already employ in your job. It’s a proclamation of the behaviors you want to believe you’re capable of. It says, “The best in me believes that this behavior represents the best I can do!”

3)Your purpose statement. This is your vision of what drives you or pulls you forward. If you plant a flag on the hilltop and show the world why you’re on this planet. Is it to be a doormat to someone else’s whims? No! Is it to be a victim to parasites? No! Or, is it to serve humanity by growing every single day? Is it to teach, to sing, to build, to guide, to enlighten? Only you know what your purpose is. If you could be seen as the best you can be, what is it. This statement is the torch in the future that is so compelling it is irresistible to you.

Here is a sample:

Letter of Commitment

Contract to be. I am a strong and committed man. I am a resourceful and creative man. I am a guardian of truth.

Contract to do. I work tirelessly and intelligently to accomplish my goals. I am focused on my vision. I always do whatever it takes to maintain my vision of my future and bring it into reality.

Purpose statement. I help people make sense of the people around them, connect with people who are important to them, and communicate with them in a meaningful way.

I commit to achieving this first goal:______

I commit to achieving it by (date)

Your signature goes here ______

Today’s date goes here ______

Now, make an additional copy of your Letter of Commitment. Mail one copy of it to yourself, and mail the other copy to someone who believes in you.

Your Reward: If you’re committed enough to take the time to write your Letter of Commitment, and you want me to check it for psychological and linguistic consistency, just give me a call at 214.366.0919.

Michael Lovasis a Clinical Hypnotherapist who helps advisors achieve what is important to them. If you feel frustrated or stuck, email Michael and ask for his AboutPeople Coaching Quiz. If you need to read first and make contact second, look at Michael’s books at: [Jeff – please insert my ProducersWeb products link here]

Michael holds two prestigious certifications; he is a Clinical Hypnotherapist and NLP Master Practitioner. He operates an active coaching practice to help professionals (like you) raise the level of their success and do it fast!

As a professional comic and musicianfor about forty years, Michael is a very different kind of trainer.As you can imagine, he delivers fascinating keynotes and workshops in the US and Canada. His topics include: 1) “The Emotional Connection in Presentations,” 2) “Credibility-focused Magnetic Marketing,” and 3) “Face Values – how to read people and influence them in less than 3 minutes.”

To book these programs for your firm, call: 214.366.0919.

To attend one of Michael’s workshops, select from the following schedule:

Emotional Connection
January
Seattle, Washington / Emotional Connection
February
Raleigh/Durham, North Carolina
Credibility-focused
Magnetic Marketing
March
Athens, Georgia / Emotional Connection &
Magnetic Marketing Intensive
March
Dallas, Texas
Emotional Connection
May
New York City / Credibility-focused
Magnetic Marketing
June
Denver, Colorado

Michael Lovas

AboutPeople, Inc.

10718 Morning Glory Dr., Dallas, TX 75229

(214) 366-09